The Best Cute Questions to Ask a Guy You Like (Exactly What To Say) post image

Ever get the tongue-tied feeling when talking to a guy you like? Do you dread those awkward silences that tend to creep in and wish you knew fun, interesting ways to keep the conversation going?

Well, look no further! You’ve come to the right place. When getting to know a guy you like, it’s important and very handy to have an arsenal of interesting questions to ask him, questions that go beyond “So what did you do today?”

A lot of people have a hard time connecting in an authentic way. We hold ourselves back, maybe because we don’t know how to get in there or maybe as a protective measure, and a connection can hit a wall at a certain point as a result.

MORE: The Ultimate List of Questions to Ask a Guy to Get Closer

To help you break through that barrier and really get to know someone, we’ve come up with the ultimate list of cute questions to ask a guy you like.

[Click here to keep reading…]

50 Personal Questions to Ask a Guy (That Really Open Him Up!) post image

In the age of texting as a main mode of communication and using emojis and memes to express how we feel, it’s getting harder to build a deep connection. A lot of us are afraid of vulnerability and there are certain places we just won’t go … and few realize that this is the reason so many people have a hard time building genuine connections.

Asking the right questions can push past someone’s walls and get them to open up. You can learn a lot about one another and really form a deep bond and really get to know someone.

MORE: 225 Questions to Ask a Guy- The Ultimate List 

The following list includes all types of personal questions. Some are fairly mild and others really get in there. Pick and choose what you feel comfortable with, and what you think your guy will be comfortable with. The most important rule is to not push too hard. Know when to back off and let it go when he doesn’t feel comfortable answering something, even if you might really, really want to know the answer.

And with that, here are 50 personal questions to ask a guy to get him to open up:

[Click here to keep reading…]

55 Signs a Guy Likes You (For Sure!) post image

You will find tons of content on how to tell if a guy likes you here on A New Mode. The reason? It’s probably the number 1 question women have when it comes to dating and relationships.

We’ve all been hurt in the past, many of us have experienced the pain of wanting someone who doesn’t like us back. And it hurts. It’s hard not to take it personally.

MORE: How to Know If a Guy Likes You For Sure

Sometimes it’s clear as day when a guy likes you, other times it’s a little hard to tell. He seems like he’s interested, but it’s hard to be totally sure, and you don’t want to come right out and ask him and risk embarrassment or rejection.

That’s why we’ve created this handy list which includes every sign that a guy definitely likes you. You have to take the full picture into account. If he’s showing maybe 1-2 signs then he probably doesn’t have strong feelings for you, he may be somewhat interested. If you find yourself checking yes to most of these, then he definitely likes you.

[Click here to keep reading…]

30 Amazing Questions to Ask a Guy Over Text post image

Texting is our main mode of communication these days- it’s just the way it is, so much so that when someone actually calls you think there must be an emergency.

Asking the right questions can really open the gates for a deep, profound connection. But there is a huge difference between talking in person and chatting via text. When texting, you can’t really ask questions where answers will be long detailed stories, or where there are a lot of nuances.

Texting also isn’t the right forum to have a heavy or deep emotional conversation because a lot can get misinterpreted or lost in translation.

MORE: 225+ Amazing Questions to Ask a Guy- The Only List You Need

Texting isn’t the time to get someone’s full life story, but you can still learn a lot about another person … when you know the right questions to ask,  questions that are little more creative than:“Hey whats up?” and  “How are you today?”

And with that, here is my compilation of the absolute best questions to ask a guy (or girl) over text.

[Click here to keep reading…]

Fun Questions to Ask a Guy (That Open Up His Playful Side) post image

Conversations have a way of becoming quite dull- maybe it’s because the art of conversation has mostly been lost in the digital age of hiding behind our screens and communicating via gifs and emojis.

Asking the right questions is a powerful way to galvanize a conversation and create a connection. These fun questions cover a range of topics and are great for asking a guy you like, a guy you’re dating, a friend, a co-worker, anyone really!

MORE: The Ultimate List of Questions to Ask a Guy to Get Closer

Some questions will reveal shocking information that may surprise you, some will bring out a hilarious story or maybe an embarrassing moment, some may open the door for deeper conversations.

Either way, they will steer you into interesting new directions.

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12 Subtle Signs of Emotional Abuse in Your Relationship post image

The signs of physical abuse are pretty cut and dried because they always involve unwanted bodily contact or physical force of some kind that’s meant to harm or intimidate.

If he touches you physically in any way that harms or traumatizes you, it’s physical abuse. The most obvious example of physical abuse is hitting, but other forms of unwanted contact also apply, such as pushing, grabbing, kicking, pinching, restraining, and even unwanted sexual contact when you’ve said no or are being coerced into doing things with your body that you don’t want to. Physical abuse often starts with the use of less immediate violence meant to intimidate, such as reckless driving, throwing things, and hitting walls, but this is usually a prelude to more direct violence against you like hitting.

MORE: 5 Warning Signs You’re In a Toxic Relationship (And It’s Killing You) 

Emotional abuse takes a much more subtle form and isn’t so easy to detect. Since there isn’t physical evidence, we can rationalize and reframe experiences to fit the reality we want instead of the reality we have, keeping ourselves in a state of denial.

[Click here to keep reading…]

Funny Questions to Ask (That Make You Look Charming and Hilarious) post image

Everyone loves to laugh, that’s just a given. Humor is a great way to connect with anyone- from a guy you’re seeing to a friend to an employer. It is one of the best ways to bond and just let loose and have some fun.

Being funny comes easily to some people, and is not as easy for others. And everyone has a different scene of humor. Some people are silly, some are raw, some have a dry sense of humor, some have a perverted sense of humor, different strokes!

You don’t need to be a natural comedian to be funny. Sometimes asking the right questions can lead to some belly-aching laughter.

MORE: The Ultimate List of Questions to Ask a Guy to Get Closer

To help you connect with a guy, or anyone really, using a little laughter, we came up with a list of the best funny questions to ask. They’re pretty universal, but you should also use your judgment and tweak as needed based on your relationship and the person’s sense of humor.

These questions are open-ended enough to spark some great conversation. You can either slip these questions into a conversation or tell him you found an awesome list of funny questions to ask someone online and why don’t you give it a try?
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The Hot and Cold Guy: Why Is He Hot and Cold (And What to Do About It) post image

Let’s talk about men going hot and cold.

Is there anything more unsettling and frustrating? You’re seeing a guy, everything seems to be going great, he seems super into you … and then he’s not. Something suddenly shifts. You try not to worry too much, but you can’t help but wonder what you may have done. But then he’s back like nothing ever happened. And just when you’re getting comfortable, he disappears again. Or he shuts down. Or he withdraws.

You have no idea where he stands. Is he into you or not? Some days it seems like he definitely is, other days he acts like you’re some sort of nuisance. Some days he’s warm, affectionate and sweet, other days he shuts you out in the cold and leaves you shivering from his icy behavior.

MORE: The Top 3 Reasons Why Men Pull Away

You may try to talk to him about it, but that effectively gets you nowhere. He either acts like he has no idea what you’re talking about or gives you some vague excuse.

So let’s dive in and look at the real reasons some men run hot and cold.

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21 Questions Game: The Absolute Best Questions to Ask post image

The 21 Questions game is a fun and easy way to get to know someone. The rules are pretty simple. You just ask someone 21 random questions and enjoy finding out the answers. Then they can follow by asking you 21 random questions.

You can play it in a group, but I personally think it’s much better one on one, or maybe with three people max. If you go beyond that, it can get a bit tedious. The best way to play if you are going to do it as a group is to just go around the circle with each person having to answer one question.

But like I said, that’s not as fun. Games like Truth or Dare or Never Have I Ever or Would You Rather are much better suited for groups.

MORE: 225 Amazing Questions to Ask a Guy

21 Questions is the perfect game to play with a guy you like, I think it’s the ideal. It’s a great way to break outside the typical flirty banter and really connect on a deeper level.
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How to be Charming (and Charm the Man You Want) post image

“It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious.” – Oscar Wilde

Everybody wants to be charming. When you see someone who seems to easily captivate the attention of anyone in a room, it’s natural to want to emulate that. While it can seem like something that you either have or you don’t, the reality is you can become that person if you want to.

People who are magnetic don’t just roll out of bed and attract others like moths to a flame. It takes effort, and the better you get at it, the more effortless it will look. This doesn’t mean manipulating anyone – in fact, forcing false qualities or playing mind games will repel others.

MORE: How to Seduce a Guy

If you want to become one of those people who seem to be able to talk to anyone, and charm any man you meet with ease, you can. Some people are effortlessly charming, others need a little help, and that’s where this article will come in.

[Click here to keep reading…]

The Best Dating Tips and Relationship Advice: 15 Life-Changing Tips You Need to Know post image

“You have to kiss a few frogs before you find your prince!”

How many times has that phrase been cheerfully offered after a bad date (or three)? Dating can be so stressful that it sometimes feels like you’re taking a year off of your life every time you put yourself out there. There may be many times when you’re tempted to quit. Times when you want to just call the whole thing off, where you resign yourself to the fact that maybe you’ll just end up alone.

You may commiserate with your single friends by swapping dating horror stories. While these can be comical when told to an audience afterward, living through them is boring, at best. At worst – it’s frightening and sometimes downright torturous.

MORE: The Truth About Playing Games and the Chase

We come up with positive clichés to pass around in the hopes of making the exhausting struggle seem commonplace. Sometimes this works, and other times it just feels more depressing.

But the truth is, there is a way to make dating more enjoyable and to gain from the experience, rather than feeling like you’re losing your dignity and your mind. With the right tips and the right things to keep in mind, you can actually learn a lot about yourself, and maybe even find that special someone.

Here are some tips for navigating modern dating.

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How to Respond When Your Ex Texts You: The Perfect Response For Every Scenario post image

You and your ex have been broken up for a little bit, or maybe even a long bit. You’re moving right along, trying to put the pieces of your life back into place … and then he texts you. How do you respond?

This can be a really nerve-wracking situation, especially if you want him back. If you don’t want him back, well you just want something quick and short to send him the message loud and clear that it’s done.

Your ex can resurface for any number of reasons. He’s bored, he’s lonely, he’s horny, things aren’t going well with his new girlfriend, he’s still in love with you (read this article for the exact signs he is), or he just misses you…

(If you want to know how to get back together with him, be sure to read this article.)

Whatever the reason is, I’ve come up with the perfect response for every scenario. I’ve also given you options of what to say if you do or don’t want him back. Just follow these scripts to take all the stress out of wondering what to say when your ex texts you.

Here we go:

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Exactly How to Know If a Guy Likes You FOR SURE post image

“Does he like me?” is by far the most oft-asked question amongst girls in the dating world.

They discuss with their girlfriends, they read articles about what “signs” to look for, they analyze every interaction, every text, every facial expression, all in the hopes of finding that elusive answer.

The sad fact is, this is a huge waste of time and energy because deciphering whether or not a guy likes you is incredibly simple. In fact, I can sum up this article in one sentence: when a guy likes you, it’s obvious!

Every day, on Facebook, in the comments section, in the forum, in my inbox … day in and day out I hear variations of the same question: Does he like me? How does he feel about me? Is he committed to me?

And really, when you get to the heart of it, if you have to ask … you already have your answer.

It really is as simple as that, but I know people love to look at signs, because that just makes it more tangible and easier to see. So I will give you a list of signs that a guy likes you, and then we’ll go a little deeper and talk about the number one thing to look for, the thing that matters more than anything, as well as why women get so confused by these situations. We’ll also look at ways we set ourselves up for heartbreak. Let’s begin.

[Click here to keep reading…]

225+ Amazing Questions to Ask a Guy: The Ultimate List post image

Breaking the ice with a guy you like can sometimes be challenging. It can also be tough to break past the typical flirty banter and really get to know each other.

I don’t know about you, but nothing is more painful to me (in a not physical pain sort of way) than awkward silences, especially on a date. And talking about the same old things can get tedious.

I started keeping a list of cool and interesting questions to ask a guy a while ago in an attempt to avoid awkward silences and generic conversation. Early on when I started dating my husband, we had a “questions” date night and it really brought us closer and helped us discover things about each other, and ourselves.

And this is something important to keep in mind about conversation in general.  Conversations aren’t meant to impress another person, but to discover them. Most people don’t take this approach and that’s why dating can feel so stressful and overwhelming. You can’t just be, instead you try to be what you think the other person wants. The best approach is to go in without an image of them, and without wanting to seem a certain way in their eyes. It’s to see them as a blank pice of paper and see how they fill in the blanks.

MORE: 20 Questions to Ask a Guy to Get Closer

And with that, here is my ultimate list of questions to ask a guy to bond, connect, and just have a laugh! Some are silly and lighthearted, others are deep and serious and will really force him to step out from behind the mask and share his true self… and that is what creates a connection and real intimacy.

I gave a little bit of explanation for the first 50 questions, just to show you why they are such good questions to ask and what they will reveal about a person. For the remainder, I just listed everything out.

All of these questions will open the gates to a deeper connection and bond, something so many people struggle with in this day and age. So enjoy the list, jot down your favorites, and have fun going through them with a guy you like.

[Click here to keep reading…]

Guy Talk: 10 Undeniable Signs a Man is Ready To Commit post image

You are ready to commit … but is your man on the same page?

It’s a very common question that plagues many women so let’s get into it and talk about the signs a man is ready to commit because no one wants to waste their time, right?

There is this idea that men are commitment-phobes. The second a guy hesitates about his feelings for a girl, he’s branded a “phobe.” But that’s not true. Most guys aren’t commitment-phobes, they’re bad relationship-phobes. Is that a thing? I think we should make it one!

Guys aren’t afraid of relationships, we’re afraid of bad relationships. Most guys don’t go out seeking commitment. We’re not usually on a quest to find a relationship. We date around and then when we meet a girl who just makes everything better… we want to be around her more and more. And before we even realize it, we’re in it. We’re committed and can’t imagine life without her. It’s as simple as that.

But what are the signs he’s ready? How do you know if you’re dating a guy who is ready to commit, or if you’re wasting time on a dead end?

Here is how to know:

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When a Guy Says He Never Wants to Get Married … post image

So he said he never wants to get married … ouch! Now what?

I recently wrote an article on the signs a man is never going to marry you. And they are all true. But you don’t need a list of signs if a man flat out tells you he never wants to get married (the same applies if he says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship), you need to just believe him and take it at face value.

So why is it so confusing then? Why do women stay in these dead-end relationships?

The reasons vary. Maybe she doesn’t want to end this relationship and start all over with someone new because that’s just exhausting. Maybe she thinks there’s a chance she can change his mind … that if she sticks it out a little longer he’ll realize he absolutely can’t live without her (hate to break it to you, but that only happens in the movies).

She thinks maybe he’s just saying he doesn’t believe in marriage, but he doesn’t really mean it. She thinks maybe his ex really did a number on him and now he’s all messed up and he needs her love in order to heal, and then he’ll give her the commitment she wants.

MORE: 5 Signs He’ll Never Commit

The fact is, the human mind is a master at coming up with rationalizations when presented with a reality we don’t quite want to accept. It can convince you of anything. And so you stay.

Maybe part of you knows this is the wrong call. And maybe that’s how you landed on this article.

So let’s dive in a little deeper and talk about exactly what to do when he says he never wants to get married.

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Exactly Why Men Withdraw from Relationships post image

Almost every woman has experienced the panic and uncertainty that occur when her man starts pulling away or withdrawing. Maybe it happens out of the blue, maybe something sparks it, either way, it’s a miserable feeling, one that leaves you feeling powerless and painfully insecure.

You question what happened, why he’s doing this, and what you may have done to cause this sudden shift. The most common questions we get involve some variation of a guy suddenly backing off and the girl going into a tizzy over it and trying to figure out what happened and what she did wrong.

What usually happens when a man starts to pull away is the woman starts spinning her wheels trying to figure out why and what she can do to get him back. She stresses over it and works herself up and this usually makes the problem worse, not better

But let’s dive a little deeper and take a closer look at the exact reasons why men withdraw (or pull away or take space), and what you can do when this happens so you don’t sabotage the relationship.

[Click here to keep reading…]

5 Hidden Signs Your Ex Still Loves You (Even If He Says He Doesn’t) post image

“The hottest love has the coldest end.” -Socrates.

Breakups are never easy. In fact, knowing you might never hold the person you love again is one of the hardest things a person can do.

After a breakup, you might feel helpless and scared he’s gone forever. You may have realized you made a big mistake or wish you’d done things differently and could rewind the clock to have another chance with him.

As for him? His post-breakup behavior might be confusing. For example, on the one hand, he texts and calls you telling you how much he misses you… and on the other hand, he ignores you and purposefully posts pictures of himself with another woman on social media knowing you will see it. Or he blocks you on Facebook and then sends you an emotional text while he’s drunk one night.

You might ask yourself: “Does he still have feelings for me or not? I just want to know!”

I am going to give you the “hidden” signs that your ex does still have feelings for you.

In addition to giving you the signs, I’m going to give you tips underneath each sign so that you can have the best chance of getting him back (if this is what you want).

[Click here to keep reading…]

26 Amazing Goodnight Texts and How They Work to Melt His Heart post image

A goodnight text is different than a regular text. There is something extra special about hearing from the person you care about at the end of a long day, as you’re starting to wind down and make your way into bed. It gives you one final smile for the day and a wave of tingly butterflies.

Men aren’t immune to the power of a goodnight text, it has the same dizzying effect on them as it does on us ladies.

I’m going to be honest with you, and I don’t mean to brag, but I’m something of a texting master. I have the do’s and don’ts of texting down pat and always get an eager response. (And if a guy doesn’t text back, here’s why.)

[Click here to keep reading…]

Why Men Pull Away: 5 Steps to Stop a Man From Withdrawing post image

When a man starts to withdraw or pull away, a lot of women reflexively panic and try to do whatever they can to reel him back in. Although they have good intentions, most women inadvertently end up pushing their guy even further away.

It is a crushing, miserable feeling. You feel powerless and scared and have no idea what the right move is. (MORE: What to Do When He Says He Needs Space)

There is something magical about meeting a guy that you actually click with. It doesn’t come around every day, so when it does you latch on tightly and feel grateful, and at the same time, afraid. But your fears are soon put to rest because things seem to be going so well.

The chemistry is strong, the vibe is good, you spend a lot of time together, you know he cares about you…and just when you’re starting to settle in and relax, he seems to be pulling away a bit.

Maybe he doesn’t text as often… he doesn’t seem as enthusiastic about you or the relationship…or maybe it’s nothing you can put your finger on, just a feeling in the pit of your stomach.

The first question when this happens is always: why?

[Click here to keep reading…]

5 Surefire Ways To Know When A Relationship Isn’t Right For You post image

One of the hardest relationship skills to master is recognizing when a relationship isn’t right and walking away. In theory this is easy, but in reality it can feel almost impossible. You know something is off, that this isn’t what you want, but you can’t quite pull the plug because … what if you’re wrong? What if you’re being overly dramatic? What if you never find better? No one’s perfect, and maybe your expectations are unrealistic.

You can stay stuck in the wrong relationship for months, even years, sitting on the fence, unable to move in one direction or the other. People act as though being alone is the worst possible thing, but I beg to differ. Being stuck in the wrong relationship is a much worse fate, a worse kind of being alone.

I believe the amount of heartbreak you experience when it inevitably ends is in direct proportion to how long you allowed things to drag on. Breakups are hard enough already, but when you add the element of mourning the loss of all the time you wasted, time you can never get back, then getting over a breakup can be unbearable. To help save you time and heartache, here is how to know when a relationship isn’t right for you.

Your relationship isn’t right for you if …

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5 Signs You’re Not Ready for a Relationship That No One Wants to Tell You post image

Wanting to be in a relationship doesn’t mean you’re ready for a relationship. It could mean you’re lonely or that you have some other issue in your life that you’re overlooking, and you believe a relationship will be your cure-all.

As women, we’ve been told for as long as we can remember that love will save us … that a relationship is that missing piece we need to complete our lives. It’s no wonder so many women focus on this so intently and think a relationship is all they need to make them happy.

I’m not denying the power of being in an amazing relationship. It can be transformative, and the benefits are immense. But before you can enjoy those benefits, you need to be in the right place internally. Unfortunately, this sometimes takes work.

I know better than anyone what this is like. During my chronically single years all I could think about was how badly I wanted to be in a relationship. I focused on my wanting, on the lack of decent, available men, on how hard it is to date in New York City, on how unfair the whole thing is … but not so much on whether I was even ready to be in a real relationship. And for most of that time, the answer was no. It took a few years and many epiphanies before I got to the right place internally and sorted through what needed sorting.

So trust me, I’m the last person to pass judgment. But I’m also the first person to give you a dose of honest truth and help you along the sometimes daunting road to get to where you want to go.

And with that, let’s take a look at the most glaring signs that you aren’t ready to be in a relationship.

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Everything You Need to Know If You Want Love That Lasts Review post image

After writing two books devoted to understanding men, “He’s Not That Complicated” and “10 Things Every Woman Needs to Know About Men,” I decided it was time to write a book about you, specifically, everything you want and need to know to have the relationship you’ve always wanted.

Do you wonder why your relationships always fall apart? What pushes men away? Are your expectations about love too high…or too low? How can you recognize dead-end relationships and stop wasting time on them? What are the signs he’ll never commit? What are the red flags you should never ignore? What factors decide whether a relationship succeeds or fails? What do men want from a relationship? What are the most common relationship mistakes women make? Why do men lose interest? And most importantly, what are the real reasons you can’t find lasting love?

My new book, “Everything You Need to Know if You Want Love That Lasts” will answer all these questions and more and provide you with everything you need to know to find and keep love that lasts. (The book was just released today and is available here.)

Writing a book is a big learning process and I always come away with many new epiphanies. As a launch day treat, I pulled a selection of my favorite, and what I consider to be the most important, insights from each chapter, the tidbits that would have saved me a lot of heartache and pain had I learned them sooner!

Here you go:

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Why the Guys You Want Don’t Want You post image

One of the most frustrating and puzzling relationship issues is determining why the guys you want don’t seem to want you.

A lot of our readers are in these types of situations; that’s probably what led them to A New Mode to begin with. They are involved with a guy who just doesn’t seem to be as interested. He’s into it, he’s attracted, he likes hanging out with her, but he’s not quite there. She, on the other hand, has gone all in and the fact that he isn’t at the same point leaves her with a constant feeling of unease just beneath the surface.

If you have been in several situations like this, you might start to wonder if it’s you, if you’re doing something wrong. But then how can that be when all these other guys, the ones you don’t want, are desperate to date you? Why is it that the commitment and the proclamations of love and devotion only seem to come from the guys you don’t want and not the ones you do?

[Click here to keep reading…]

Link Love post image

Link Love


10 Ways to Know You’re Dating a Keeper – Em & Lo 

5 Small Things That Will Bring Big Happiness to your Life – Your Tango 

8 Questions You’re Too Embarrassed to Ask Your Gyno – Her Campus

5 Relationship Resolutions That Will Bring You Love in 2016 – Elite Daily 

Why Good People Ghost: The Rise of a Dishonest Dating Culture – Thought Catalog 

5 Signs He’s Not The One post image

5 Signs He’s Not The One


The most difficult relationship skill is recognizing when something isn’t working and summoning the strength to walk away. Love isn’t enough to ensure a relationship stands the test of time. Two people can love each other very much and still not be right for one another. We’d all like to believe that all you need is love, but the truth is, it’s a lot more complicated than that.

If a lasting, committed relationship is what you want, you need to be able to recognize the warning signs that indicate a relationship isn’t built to last.

Here are the top five signs that he isn’t the one:

[Click here to keep reading…]

10 Things Every Woman Needs to Know About Men Review post image

We’ve been telling you about this for a little while and now it’s finally here… our new book, “10 Things Every Woman Needs to Know About Men” is available on Amazon for Kindle and in paperback.

If there is anything I’ve learned over the last seven years spent writing about men and relationships, it’s that knowledge is power. It is also freedom. It grants you freedom from being stuck in dead-end relationships, from racking your brain trying to figure out what he’s thinking and how he feels. It frees you from the stress, insecurity, and worry that come with not knowing.

This book takes a look at the most common relationship scenarios- the ones that cause the most confusion- and explains everything. It provides a breakdown of the male psyche while also giving you a lot of insight into yourself and into your relationships. While the book was written by me and in my own voice, Eric worked closely with me as my trusted advisor and man decoder and provided invaluable insights into the male mind that I never could have uncovered on my own.

To give you a little taste of what you’ll learn, here are the 10 things you need to know as well as small samplings of what you’ll find in each chapter.

[Click here to keep reading…]

20 Questions to Ask a Guy You Like to Get Closer post image

In this age of endless connection, we are more disconnected than ever and most relationships don’t go very far beyond the surface. Maybe it’s because we hold ourselves back or maybe it’s because we no longer have the tools to genuinely connect, like face-to-face and via conversation.

In order to build the foundation for a relationship, you need to create a meaningful connection, and this comes when you truly connect with who the other person is.

A little while back, I discovered this site called Thought Questions and I started keeping a list of some of my favorites. When my husband and I were still dating, I pulled up the list one night and suggested we play the “questions game.” We also mixed it up by seeing if we could guess what the other person would answer. It was a lot of fun, but also a very profound experience and we ended up learning so much about each other (and about ourselves!), which brought us even closer. To this day we make an effort to spend time asking each other deep, meaningful questions that go beyond ‘how was your day?’ And every time we do this, we discover new and interesting things about each other.

MORE: 225+ Amazing Questions to Ask a Guy

In his book “The Seven Principles of Making a Marriage Work,” famed relationship researcher John Gottman (the dude who can predict whether a couple will get divorced with something like 95% accuracy after watching them interact for only a few minutes) cites “enhancing your love maps” as the first principle. A love map is essentially knowing all relevant information about your partner’s life, from small things like the name of their first pet to big things like significant experiences that shaped who they are. He explains that couples who have detailed love maps of each other’s worlds are much more equipped to cope with stressful events and overcome conflict.

The point is, knowledge is power and asking the right questions can unlock the gates for a meaningful connection and deep understanding of one another. It doesn’t matter what stage of a relationship you’re in, it could be the first date or your 10th year of marriage, people are deep and complex and always evolving so there is always something new to learn.

To help you tap into the power of knowing, here is a list of my favorite bonding questions to ask your guy in order to get even closer and more connected.

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5 Signs He’s Not That Into You post image

There is nothing more exasperating in the world of dating than a guy who seems really interested, but then also maybe not…but then yes…but no again. I’ve been there, and I know most of you have based on the comments and e-mails we receive.

When a guy really likes you, it’s usually pretty obvious. So too when a guy doesn’t like you. The uncertainty usually runs rampant if a guy seems to fall somewhere in between.

He disappears for days at a time and then texts you the sweetest message you’ve ever received. He says he really cares about you, but doesn’t really act like it. And while you’re on this topsy-turvy ride, all you want to know is does this guy like me or not?! You see, a guy can be somewhat interested, but not into it. Instead of seeing it for what it is, women make up excuses and justifications to rationalize the bad behavior away. They say he’s sending mixed messages or playing games or is afraid of getting hurt.

Ladies, my many years of dating and writing about dating have taught me one thing: there are no mixed messages. Either he’s into you or he’s not.

Here are five tell-tale signs that he’s not:

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11 Undeniable Signs He’s In Love With You post image

He loves me … he loves me not … if only finding the answer were as simple as plucking petals off a flower. So what makes it so hard to determine if a man truly loves you?

A lot of us have ideas about what love should be, what it should look like, and how it should feel. A lot of the time these ideas are plain wrong (we can thank romantic comedies for that). Because of that, some of us might not recognize the real thing when it comes our way. Maybe it’s because of these grand visions of love that have been implanted in our minds, but it could also be the result of being burned too many times in the past and having walls up when it comes to either giving love or being able to receive it.

The point is, love is a tricky thing. A guy can say he loves you and not truly mean it, and a guy can love you a lot but not be ready to say it.

Love, as beautiful as it is, can also be scary, and a lot of us keep our guard up until we’re sure he feels a certain way in order to keep from getting hurt. As the saying goes, before you fall in love, make sure there is someone there to catch you. The trouble with this is that when you get caught up in trying to figure out if a man loves you, you can no longer be present in the relationship. Instead of connecting, you are stuck in your own worried thoughts, and those thoughts produce fears and insecurities that ultimately block you from getting the love you want.

So how do you know if a man is truly in love with you? If he shows these 11 signs, then it’s pretty safe to say he is.

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