5 Telltale Signs He Likes You post image

5 Telltale Signs He Likes You


He likes me, he likes me not…. now that is the real question.

Eric and I say over and over again that when a man likes you, it’s obvious. (That phrase was even the title of the first chapter of our book “10 Things every Woman Needs to Know About Men.”)

However, given the high volume of questions we receive from readers asking us to decipher whether a guy likes them or not (and the fact that “Does He Like Me?” is the most popular article on the site), it obviously isn’t so obvious to you when a guy likes you.

Even though I write about relationships for a living, I also used to get tripped up back when I was single and would catch myself spinning into analysis mode while trying to figure out how guys felt. You analyze the texts, you replay your interactions with him over and over in your mind, you cling tightly to the compliments and kisses…and are more quick to part with some of the red flags and bad signs.  When you add emotions (and a bit of ego) into the mix, it can be hard to see things clearly. Instead, you’re seeing the situation through a lens of wishful thinking and sometimes a bit of self-deception.

Trust me, I know how confusing and frustrating it can be at times but the fact remains that when a guy likes you, it is obvious … especially when you know what signs to look for.

Read on for exactly how to tell if a guy likes you: 

1. He initiates.

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If you’re at a party, he comes up to you and strikes up a conversation. If you’re not in the same immediate vicinity, he reaches out to you. Finding an excuse to talk to you doesn’t require much creativity. If he wants to get your attention, he’ll think of something.

If a guy likes you, he might ask you for things he didn’t necessarily need to ask you, or start a conversation he didn’t need to have with you. Maybe his company is hiring and he asks if you know anyone looking for a job, or he knows someone looking for a roommate and he asks if you know anyone, or he asks if you have any recommendations for a place to take his parents for dinner. When he wants to get your attention, he’ll think of something, even if he just makes it up.

If he doesn’t demonstrate any interest in talking to you–he doesn’t initiate or maybe he cuts the conversation short and makes an exit–then it’s a clear sign he probably doesn’t like you in that way.

Initiating is only phase one, though. If a guy likes you, he will take it beyond that and actually ask you out. If he doesn’t, then he may just see you as a friend, or maybe he’s interested in hooking up with you but he’s not interested in dating you. If a guy likes you, he will usually ask you out and make an effort to be with you. (For more on this, read The Only Way to Know if a Guy Likes You For Sure.)

2. He listens to what you say and remembers the details.

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When we like someone, we can’t get enough. We want to know every detail, every story, even the insignificant ones. If a guy asks you a lot of questions about yourself and your life and shows a genuine interest in who you are and what you like, he is investing in you.

You’ll get further confirmation of this if he remembers the things you told him: where you went to high-school, your major in college, the name of your first pet. He will also want to share himself with you. You may notice he talks about himself a lot (especially the good parts, like areas where he is succeeding). This is because when a guy likes you he wants to impress you, he wants you to think highly of him.

Now some guys might just do this because they have fragile egos and something to prove. So watch out for guys who only talk themselves up. But if a guy shows a serious and genuine interest in learning all about you, then that is a big sign he likes you.

QUIZ: Does He Like Me?

3. Body language cues.

know-if-he-likes-you-3A guy might come across all slick, but his body language can tell you a lot about how he really feels.

Mirroring is one way to assess if he’s into you. If you notice that he mimics your body language, it means he’s trying to connect to you and is completely focused on you. Other body language cues to look out for is if he leans in when talking to you, points his feet towards you, and  maintains eye contact. Usually when  guy likes you he’ll give you that deep penetrating stare, it’s the kind of thing that you just know when you see it.

Also, notice if he looks at you after he makes a joke or does something funny. If he likes you, he’ll look to see your reaction right away. Many experts claim that a guy’s pupils will dilate if he’s interested but this can be kind of tricky to assess. Another strong tell is if he finds ways to touch you. It could be “accidental” like brushing against your arm, seemingly innocent like a high-five that lingers a little longer that it usually would, or intentional like putting his hand on your when you’re telling a story.

If he avoids eye contact, positions his body away from you, doesn’t encourage conversation or volunteer anything about himself, or maintains distance from you, he’s not feeling it.

4. Acts different around you.

know-if-he-likes-you-4If a guy likes you, he’ll act a little different when he’s around you. He might seem a bit nervous and fidgety, or maybe he tones down his usual “macho” attitude.

You may notice he seems a little flustered or maybe even blushes a bit when you talk to him. If he behaves differently with you than other people in his life it’s a sign that he holds you in a different regard. Pay attention to the way he is with his friends and other people to get a baseline for how he usually acts.

For example, if he flirts with everyone or is super friendly and attentive when he talks to anyone then it won’t necessarily mean as much if he acts that way with you.

Some guys just have flirty personalities, it’s who they are.  This is where a lot of girls get confused. They get all wound up because some guy totally swept them off their feet. He got their number, they had a flirty conversation, she texts him and…Nothing! Where did he go?

The problem is, that particular guy flirts with every girl. That’s just his way of being.

Flirting doesn’t always mean anything; he might just be working on his flirting skills. Also, flirting can be exciting and fun.

If he likes you, then the way he is with you will be different than his normal state. A guy who is usually pretty flirty may become shy and reserved in your presence. Or maybe he’ll be even more flirty than his baseline level of flirtiness.

Personal Confession:  Way back in my single days I met a guy who seemed perfect for me in every way. He was funny, kind, successful, not to mention, almost uncomfortably attractive.  We have mutual friends so I’d run into him here and there and he was always pretty flirty with me and would say really sweet things that led me to believe the interest was reciprocal…that I was beautiful, cool, great to talk to, stuff like that. It drove me absolutely crazy because it seemed like he liked me but he wasn’t asking me out, or even asking for my number.

I knew conventional wisdom would say that he just wasn’t into me, but it didn’t feel that way! I would obsess over this endlessly and would always draw different conclusions:

Maybe he didn’t think I was interested in him and he was afraid of being rejected, maybe he’s intimidated by me, maybe he’s worried about it being weird because we have so many mutual friends, maybe, maybe, maybe. One night I brought a girlfriend to a birthday party that he was also at. When he saw my friend, I noticed a look in his eye that he never had with me.

They got to talking and it was obvious that he was super into her. He got her number and called to ask her out a few days later. Suffice to say I felt like a total idiot for thinking we shared this secret connection for all these months. I had to face the facts, while he liked flirting with me, he just didn’t like me. When he met a girl he did like, it was obvious all and he didn’t hesitate to make a move.

5. He compliments your appearance.

know-if-a-guy-likes-you-5Every guy I spoke to while gathering intel for this article said complimenting a girl’s appearance is the clearest sign that a guy is interested. If a guy is into you, he’ll pay close attention to your appearance and won’t be shy about letting you know it.

Compliments are his way of telling you he notices you and wants to make you feel good.

The only caveat is if it’s a guy who is already a close friend of yours. In that case, he might be complimenting you to be nice and doesn’t think you’ll take it the wrong way. Men are visual creatures, much more so than women. The first thing that will spark a guy’s interest is a woman’s appearance, that’s just the way it is (a woman, on the other hand, may be interested in something about the guy). If he notices your appearance and compliments you, it’s a pretty clear sign he likes you.

MORE: How to Get Out of the Friend Zone With a Guy

So there you have it, the strongest indicators that a guy is interested in you. Hope this gives you a bit of clarity and clears up any confusion for those grappling with the age old does he or doesn’t he question. Above all else, when a guy likes you it’s obvious. Usually if you have to ask, you already have your answer. The signs listed in this article can help you know what to look for, but when a guy is really into you, you won’t have to look that hard. You’ll just know, it will just be clear.

I hope after reading this article you’re totally clear on the signs a man likes you. In my years of writing about relationship I’ve found that there are two major moments that determine if you will last as a couple, or if you will be left heartbroken so it’s really important that you take the next step and read this article. At some point he’s going to ask himself: Is this the woman I want to spend my life with? That answer will shape everything. Do you know what inspires a man to commit, and what men look for in a long term partner (rather than a passing fling). If not you need to read this next: The #1 Things Men Desire in a Woman

The second problem is one most women have lived through … at some point he starts pulling away and seems to be losing interest. He isn’t as responsive, he isn’t as excited by you, he just isn’t as present and you’re afraid he’s going to leave. Do you know what to do when this happens? If not you run the risk of making a major mistake that could push him further away so read this now so you don’t risk losing him If He’s Pulling Away, Do This...

This Is How to Tell If a Guy Likes You:

  1. He Initiates.
  2. He listens to what you say and remembers the details.
  3. Body language cues.
  4. Acts different around you.
  5. He compliments your appearance.
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Written by Sabrina Alexis

I’m Sabrina Alexis, the co-founder, and co-editor of A New Mode. I love writing relatable, insightful articles that help people understand relationship dynamics and how to get the love they want. I have a degree in psychology and have spent the last 10 years interviewing countless men and reading and studying as much as I can to better understand human psychology and how men operate. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Instagram.

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Lino

Ok so i never took notice of this guy. He was nice so me being a nice person i return the favor. I heard rumors he was gay and was always an issue with everyone. One fine day he need help so i agreed to do so knowing no one was willing to help him. I carried some boxes he needed to bring down to the basement where the car that was taking him was going to be i helped him down while unloading i was so busy i didn’t realise where he was i kept unloading the boxes and i felt a hand run against my waistline. At first i was so shocked i didn’t know how to react so i continued unloading the boxes after that was completely i got the trolley and walked towards the lift. I walked straight to my manager and advised her of the happening and she jokingly said lino, make him a man! Ok i brushed that aside and continued like nothing went wrong. A couple of months later i was walking past the same guy and he was humming my favorite song so i decided to hum with him and he started dancing and i mimicked him. I guess to me was i was releasing stress. Anyways the weekend came and i kept wondering why i was thinking of him on Saturday. Just to find out on Monday he sent a song on Saturday. He had rewritten the lyrics of the song “hula hoop” puting his own words in and my full name in the chorus. On the email he said lino this song will not be the same again and i hope this puts a spin on your dial.. a couple of days later i wore my hair out not wanting to comb. At the same time he approached me i was eating a shared lunch with my manager and a colleague. We were all shocked he came up to me saying lino i like it when you have your hair like that pointing to my current hair do. At the end of year party he was asking us to wave our hands in a pattern cause he wanted to take a video. Everyone in line were tired. I advised him am sorry were all tired and hot. What happened next i wasn’t expecting! He came so close to my face i could smell is breathe took off my hat and put it on him and told me i can make you hotter. I seriously didn’t know what to do! I just pretended to laugh and got back my hat, embarrassed too! Anyways i went home forgetting that. So i went on leave and when i returned i was moved to level 9 to take up the reception duties which his also on that floor.days later i ket him in the kitchen he kept taking about the virus and its news, between his talking of the topic he swhiches to lino i have noticed you have not been around and before i could answer he continues with the covid top! So i just listen to him.then he tells me if am interested i could give him the flash. Which i gave an am i had to wait. Recently his been coming and sitting with me and we talk about Coronavirus only. I did ask him and he just said his got a gf. On Friday he said he was a loner?? And i was a loner too cause i told him i just go home and watch tv. Could you tell me after reading what i have been experiencing. Am confused.

Reply July 10, 2021, 10:03 am

Soumya

I mean he did most of the signs except for initiating a conversation..what does that mean?

Reply July 23, 2020, 12:41 am

Taylor Fairclough

I’ve been talking to this guy for 2 months not met for a date (cancelled due to family issues) but we speak every night on the phone or FaceTime. Always compliments me. But he always says we r just mates and he isn’t ready for a relationship. Next minute I get asked out by a guy respectfully reject him cos I like this guy n he said show him a pic of me and say I’m ur fella…. Always compliments my figure and the fact I was training to be an accountant ect. He has even cried on the phone to me and says I’m the woman he should go for because u can read him really well. Even to the fact of not calling him back once I sensed he was annoyed n upset. He said god I’ve finally found a woman who understands me but doesn’t want me as a girlfriend and says nothing will ever happen. Yet when drink tells me he wants to sleep with me

Reply March 31, 2019, 4:09 pm

Aria

So my sister found out my crush likes me. But he doesn’t really act like it. I see him looking at me. But he never texts me first. He kinda ignores me. why does he act like that. How can I find out he truly likes me. And how can I get him to show if he doses or not?

Reply April 2, 2018, 1:51 am

Marie Torp DDS

Thanks so much for sharing

Reply December 29, 2018, 7:18 am

Roxy

Well it all started I’m at the guy five months ago And we’re friends with benefits but I find myself thinking that he had a crush on me for a while because he asked me hey I think you have feelings for me and I said no and I Street put them on the front them ever since it feels like I think he liked me and now I find myself liking him now I have no way of trying to figure out if he actually still does like me like he did before I put him in the friend zone and actually push them away and have no way of telling him how I feel now

Reply February 17, 2018, 12:13 pm

Kim

How the hell am I supposed to know if the guy I’m with likes me or not as he shows me no signs of affection . he says he really really likes me . he won’t let me hug or kiss him or even hold his hand .he used to do those things even smack me on the bum . I’ve noticed he has mostly stopped doing it since I lost weight. I don’t see the point in staying he doesn’t want me to leave. Then why am I here because I sure as hell don’t now .

Reply February 1, 2018, 11:39 am

maryanne

i dont know if this guy is into me or just playing, but the signs are whenener im out meeting new friends he comes out of his house and listens to what i have to say, he wants to know who im talking with, is he interested?

Reply October 18, 2017, 12:44 am

Cookie

Ok so the think is that there is this guy I like and I’m not sure if he likes me or if he likes someone else because he’s really into beatboxing and for some reasons he always beatboxes around me and I don’t know if that is a sign or what plz help me I’m really confused and I don’t know what to do because I really like him.pkz help me.om only 12 and he’s 11 and I’m so confused because to me he is REALLY cute.i really need help plz get back to me as soon as u can

Reply September 4, 2017, 11:46 pm

Crade

The problem I have is that this guy is a coworker. I know from talking to him that he is very ambitious. He started the eye contact flirting and I responded. However, we both pulled back after sometime. The problem is that I have grown to like him a lot. Now I want him and Keep getting mixed signals. The eye contact is there on and off, he responds well to communications that I initiate but does not initiate. He never talks to me about a girlfriend or anything like that. I have said some things that I regret due to ego i.e. Suggesting that I am not looking for a relationship because I sensed a rejection from a coworker. I am not sure if he likes me or not but I know I am deeply infatuated with him. To maintain my sanity I have started a no contact period. I am in werk2 and it is driving me nuts. It must be like breaking an addiction. Pretty hard. I have never felt this way about any man before! I like his personality and looks and find him very sexually attractive. Being coworkers made connection difficult as I have given mixed signals too! Sometimes the situation does not make things obvious. Even he may not know that I am crazy about him as well! Fear of rejection and coworker sensitivities can cloud the waters!

Reply July 4, 2017, 8:41 am

Sophie

So there’s this guy I like and he’s a smooth guy but he’s always shy around me, I’d catch him staring a lot at me sometimes with a smile on his face, even in the club he was watching me for a while but if I ever Snapchat him he never replies. My friend is positive he likes me but I’m not sure! Any ideas? And how could I approach him if so? Please help!

Reply June 27, 2017, 9:30 am

Alek

I think I’m the only guy in the world that doesn’t just go for looks. Personality makes up 90% of a woman. I’ve found women and thought they were attractive, but when I got to KNOW who they really were like, basically jerks, my interest in them went completely out the window. Respectful and caring women are the most attractive.

Reply June 22, 2017, 7:09 pm

Chloe

Your a nice guy I hope I will find a guy just like you.

Reply August 29, 2017, 5:53 am

Lili

I been in long distance relation shift for 5 month my virtual boyfriend want to come to visit me to my place.

My question is I planing to rent a limousine to pick up him with champagne please advise if it is ok or it is too much investment ? How a guy see it?

Thank you

Reply June 1, 2017, 10:34 pm

Rhiana(not actual name)

Well,I am just going to find out whether my ex(don’t whether to call him one)likes me still.Because he told me he choose me out of his current girlfriend and i wasn’t sure if that was true.Before that he told his friends,we were going out,then asked to go to park

He gets really fidgety when he’s around me,although i don’t know if he trying to use me.His girlfriend is now acting a little mean and over-protective when I’m there.My friends him cute but I’ve got to say I’m not going to fall for him.

Old feelings mixed up with his new self.

Reply May 2, 2017, 6:31 pm

milcha

ummmm… so i like this guy, hes my best friends ex. we strted talking a few days bfor they broke up. in class he used to walk over to my desk and start talking to me even tho he didnt have a seat he’d just kneel in front of me. he would walk me to our next class and keep me company. after one class i’d walk past him saying “hey” or something and meet up with my friends and lately he would push me the other way and have me walk him to his next class even tho i said i had to meet ppl. idk what to think. appaently he has a “thing” with another girl…

Reply May 1, 2017, 4:25 pm

Amy

I like this guy and I think he likes me to. we’ve never actually talked much but I think he always stared at me whenever I was around and when I looked at him he would just not let our eyes meet. When we are with our friends, he listen what i talk but rarely joins the conversation until he is asked something. I dont know if he likes me.please tell me what to do.

Reply April 7, 2017, 11:17 pm

Alessia

So I like this boy since 2 years. He never talked to me about anything in the past years. But this year, it’s not like that. At the start of this year he used to talk to me
about homework and all. Now he is kinda open and makes dirty jokes. But HE!!! FLIRTS!!! WITH!!!! EVERYONE!!!!! and on top of that, he does not even realize he is actually flirting. -_- Back in January and February, he used to touch me ‘by accident’ idk by accident or ‘by accident’ and We kinda chat through bio’s on Instagram. Ik it’s weird…I updated my bio saying I know Spanish because his biio is in Spanish. (Neither of us actually know spanish…) And now his captions are also in Spanish. Idk it’s just a coincident or… :/ I really crave for advice pleaase someone help me out. Y_Y Pleasee…

Reply March 27, 2017, 1:30 pm

Kadence

So this guy is always acting mean around me and my friends and then when he texts me he acts all nice and stuff. What does that mean?

Reply March 13, 2017, 10:59 pm

Alessia

He is either a player or maybe wants to be with you ONLY and not your friends. Or maybe is shy because, It’s public! idk tho

Reply March 27, 2017, 1:32 pm

Carla

Maybe he’s trying to impress you, because men express these feelings in a different way. But, he could totally be in to you!

Reply May 17, 2017, 5:02 pm

_themenace

Yes Emily Gourdin Bischoff, I love you :*

Reply December 30, 2016, 10:21 am

Becca

My boy friends ex is my friend and she really love him and she don’t know what’s going on between us what should I Do

Reply December 28, 2016, 10:46 am

Matthew

Just one thing I want to say, even if a guy doesn’t like you back NEVER EVER feel stupid about misreading the situation.

I’ve had girls that liked me and the feeling was mutual and others who liked me but I didn’t reciprocate the feeling and when they found out they felt embarrassed. But it’s not like I looked down upon them for doing what humans do. If anything I felt kind of flattered.

If a guy thinks less of you because you liked him while he didn’t, it’s because he’s immature and stupid and this is coming from a guy, me. Always remember that!

Reply December 5, 2016, 8:11 am

sho

I’d like to add something about number 4, that is acting differently around you – in particular with respect to those guys who are outgoing, friendly etc.

My recent crush is like that – friendly, easygoing, smooth talker, everyone likes him. You would think that he was like that with me too and so it was difficult to tell… – nope! The thing with such guys is that whereas they smooth with everyrone, they are not smooth with you! I didn’t even notice that he is not that smooth with me until we met together another girl in a bar and he started to talk to her. He completely wasn’t into her, but he was super friendly, talkative, they almost exchange numbers after a few minutes. That was the biggest tell! With me, he was all guarded, a bit nervous, shy…

So, that’s the clue to look for with those smooth ones.

Reply December 5, 2016, 12:13 am

Kate

Last school year there was this guy that obviously liked me. Since I have low self esteem I told myself that he probably didn’t like me and it just seemed like he did because it would be too good to be true. I liked him back but I tried not to because I thought I would just end up heartbroken. Over the summer when I saw him it was extremely obvious he liked me so I started to like him even more. When the new school year started and I tried showing him I liked him, it seemed like he kind of lost interest. Sometimes it seems like he could still like me but then other times I’m not so sure. I was thinking that maybe he got intimidated because I never really showed him any interest but I really don’t want that to happen because I really like him a lot!

Reply December 3, 2016, 11:34 am

zoe

Okay so… I have two guy friends. I like one of them but I don’t know if he likes me back, and I think the other one likes me. For example, the one I like is always very fidgety and stressed and if I talk to him it always gets awkward. I’ve liked him for a while but I’m wondering if it’s lost its spark, you know? The other one (the one that I think likes me) is literally the polar opposite. I can talk to him about anything and I know I can trust him with very personal stuff. He seems really interested and I think having a relationship with him would be wonderful. He’s committed, sweet, and relaxed. But the first guy also has told me before that he thinks having a relationship with me would be “exciting.” It made me a little uncomfortable, honestly. He’s sweet and nice, but it’s just awkward around him! I don’t want to hurt him in any way at all, but I don’t know if I should actually commit to him (the first one). Can someone help me? I’m so confused!

Reply November 3, 2016, 7:25 pm

Loriane

Go for the one who you can be yourself with him. It feels nice and natural, and you don’t question yourself. You just know you want to be with him.

Reply March 25, 2017, 10:46 pm

CN

See… Now im more confused cos hes half yes and half he doesnt so its like he likes me but yheres a wall… Meh. ☹️

Reply September 23, 2016, 6:18 am

Tara

OK so since I moved to my area nearly four years ago I’ve been running in to this guy. I have to walk past his house to go to the beach and he surfs so he’s always at the beach too. Sometimes I ran into him so often it was awkward. I never tried to talk to him and have always avoided eye contact, he tried to say hi a couple of times and tried to talk to me once but I kinda blew him off. I wasn’t interested in any guy and my confidence was a bit low at that point… I wasn’t feeling anything with him but felt some sort of ‘vibe’ from him. I didn’t know how to interpret it. Anyway… I moved to another area and didn’t see him for about a year .. And walking my dog one day and I see him standing there out the corner of my eye staring at me, he was with his dog… Like waiting for me to come over… So I did and he started a conversation with me but never acknowledged that he remembered me…. Which to me was awkward… He talked about his dog and went on a bit, then asked what I was doing on the weekend,then he asked where I was from and I told him I remembered him from the old area but now I live down the road and he seemed shocked. He tried to ask me questions but I didn’t give him much to work with because I didn’t know if he was flirting or being friendly… He tried to keep the conversation going longer than it should have and at the end said ‘alright I might see you around sometime’ and for some reason after he left this chemistry just came over me and I felt like cupid hit me with his damn arrow… And I was so closed off! Stand offish…. I didn’t give him anything to work with, I was too confused and now I haven’t been able to stop thinking about him and how I might never see him again. Does it sound like he actually likes me or have I way over analysed? What do I do? I haven’t had a crush in ten years and the one I ended up being amazing and I was spot on.

Reply September 15, 2016, 4:03 am

vassi

Hey,
So i have a huge crush on this guy . We have just talked once in all 1 year of knowing(just so you know it was one of the best i have ever had , lots of eye contact) . Yesterday i was busy reading in the library and i heard him. He was in the same aisle with a friend , i was take aback heart beating faster and he looked totally calm. Then he cracks a joke and i think he was staring towards me , so i smiled and looked towards him. He glanced away and told his friend to make it quick . And then left quickly.
Should i have hope or try focusing on moving on ?

Reply September 10, 2016, 10:22 am

Alessia

If you still think about him, Yes. Approach him. ONLY IF YOU STILL THINK ABOUT HIM. <3 (this is something else ) Idk what's going on in your life but always try to find happiness in everything! (I'm just in a mood for talking like this and all , you know. to make someone's day brighter. ) Remember there is someone out there who truly loves you. Maybe you found him now. Maybe the one you're dating right now isn't the one you actually deserve. Maybe you'll find the right guy in the future. Maybe he is infront of you and you did not realize it. No matter what, we will always love you and YOU GO GIRL! You're awesome!

Reply March 27, 2017, 1:41 pm

madison

Im with this guy but,I think he doesn’t like me anymore and he doesn’t make any effort to see,talk,or look at me and he does little gestures but, then he just stops completely and every time he does the gestures they give me hope then….*bam* I have no more hope and I’m left wondering if I should break up with him………..PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!. YES or NO????

Reply June 29, 2016, 11:10 pm

Joshua

there is this cute girl in my class and basically I really like her and she is the kind that seems very reserved and like doesn’t open up so I obviously didn’t expect any sings from her but one day she really surprised me by asking me to add her on snapchat but due to a crisis I couldn’t and the next day she completely ignored me and she started acing strangely then afterwards I told her about how I attempted to add her but failed to do so and asked her to add me and she said she would but she hasn’t added me and the thing is she is usually doing whatever I am doing like she does sometimes mirror my movement so if I were to start playing with a pencil she does the same thing and she remembers thinhs ive said weeks ago do you think she even likes me and if so why is she acting starnge now a days

Reply June 3, 2016, 9:02 pm

Sam

If she’s really a shy and reserved person then it must have taken her a lot of courage to tell you to add her on snapchat. Technical issues or not, she must have seen you not adding her as a sign of disinterest. The thing is that shy people get disheartened really fast (I know, cause I’m a shy person) . Currently your best bet will be to remain persistent and not give up so easily. If she really does like you then she’ll open up sooner or later, or else tough luck.
All the best buddy

Reply June 5, 2016, 2:10 am

madison

Joshua,if you like her then when you feel like telling her that maybe pull her aside one day or say”hey can I talk to you?”.If she says “I like you too” or “you do?” then yay your in the good luck pit. Also just so u know if she studders or blushes or runs away or maybe even just stands there surprised don’t do anything to blow your chance!! I sometimes blush and runaway because I think to myself “did he really just say that?”so if you like her great but,just don’t blow it……and maybe you could ask her out you know! Well good luck joshua and maybe I’ll see you around one day!! :)

Reply July 1, 2016, 1:31 am

jeanie

Best guess please! I really like a certain guy, but i am stumped. In public, he does the “male splay”, turns his WHOLE body to me only, makes jokes TO ME, and makes eye contact – tons. When we’re alone, he barely looks at me, he mumbles, and stares at the ground. Does this mean he doesn’t like me “in that way”, because he’s avoiding intimate settings, or that he does like me, but is scared of intimate settings? I’m so happy to “know” him, as friends or more, i don’t want to stress the relationship. Just thankful he’s in my life. But if he’s interested, i certainly am, too! Zero idea how to interpret his polar reactions……. We’re both middle aged and divorced.

Reply May 2, 2016, 8:05 pm

Andrea

I noticed a guy who would look at me from far away, but I ignored him. But second semester I noticed him looking at me more often and I started to take interest but then I found out that he had a girlfriend and they’ve been going out for more than a year. Which confused me because he’s always looking at me during class, I found out that he was pretty smart and I took more interest in him but when I found out he had a girlfriend I backed out. He usually looks at me but doesn’t makes it obvious but sometimes it is. He sometimes positions himself towards me even though we’re not in the same group in a class and he glances at me often. I know who his girlfriend is and I see her but we’ve never developed a conversation and although I’ve tried to stay away from him since I started to find some interest in him we usually get closer because of class. Once he accidentally brushed himself in my arm. I started to develop some feelings even though I didn’t want to and I’ve tried to ignore him but it’s becoming harder and I don’t know what to do cuz I don’t want to break their relationship. He still looks at him and when he talks to me he sometimes avoids eye contact. And I’m confused by his actions and I’m not sure if he likes me or what he’s trying to do since he has a gf.

Reply April 17, 2016, 4:03 pm

amy

There this guy I might have a crush on and he been visiting a girl that’s in a hospital and he said sorry he hasnt been responding to my Texts and he says I’ll be honest I use to like her well not anymore but his actions lately say differently he just was so scared what happened to her I didn’t ask him to explain to me that information but my friend say it’s his way of opening up to me and wants to be honest . idk what you guys think??

Reply April 12, 2016, 11:01 pm

Andrea

Girl, i do understand you. The same thing happened to me a year ago. I couldn’t bear the pain so I just told him and we got together but then I saw he didn’t care about me at all and that was all. I hated him for a long period, but after 4 months of crying, it stopped. And now I’m fine . All I had to do was to release all my feelings.Life moves on. It doesn’t stop at one boy.What I want to say is that you should tell him what you really feel if he doesn’t make any move, you can’t just stay there and watch him ignoring you because you will suffer more. You two should really talk about it. Maybe he’s shy or he doesn’t know what he feels, that’s why he hasn’t talked to you yet. Good luck! Love is pain, but pain is life. It isn’t always how we want it to be. :)

Reply December 30, 2015, 4:17 pm

Andrea

Hi! I’m a freshman and he’s a senior (we’re in the same school). We met each other for the first time when he came to help me at some school subject he excels at. We talked a lot after we did our work and he really showed me signs he likes me.He told me about all the relationships he had with girls and he gave me advice about my future highschool life. We exchanged phone numbers at the end and he said I could call him whenever I’d need him to help me at something or I’d feel I want to talk to him. A week after, we met again and again to work together. He gave me an innocent hug ‘to show’ me how he once hugged a girl at a party and he was permanently looking me in the eyes.
At the moment I’m the one who always initiates conversation or calls to meet up. He always answers and is there to help me but he doesn’t call/text if i don’t. I started to like him…deeply…and I feel like I miss him a lot. I think I should move on anyway because he gives me mixted signals and i don’t know if he really feels something for me too and i just don’t know what to do.Sometimes i just think he’s maybe too old for me (he’s some kind of a wise man and he probably considers me just a kid in comparison with him) .Any help?

Reply December 27, 2015, 3:54 pm

Maryam Nikmaram

Hi. Thank you for being there answering my question.
There was this guy that i got acquanited with via my manager 5 months ago. He was his friend. We took an-hour class together and i didnt feel anything for him till he started coming to our company for the first time and as a result he talked to me about that day and how i saw that class and actually he gave me a great deal of look which i didnt take seriously because i didnt know him very well. Days passes and he comes to our office 2 or 3 times a month but i dont see him. Then on a start of a new project he decides to cooperate with our manager and be one of the investors. He gave me some kind of trying-to-hide looks while i was among my other girl friends and i returned back some of his look the way he looked at me without trying to be flirting. Then he came to our company for some construction changes as he is a building designer and while i was talking to my manager he reached us and stand totally in front me and directly toward me and stared at me while talking to our manager. As he was there for some days, he did the following just to me and not to my other girl collegues as they themselves told me he is so indifferent to them: 1- He came toward me straight and stand by my side and his body completly toward me looking and smiling at me a great deal in front of every one. He talked to me about the person on the phone and said that she talks too much!! He had his cellphone on speaker mode when he reached me and that girl was continusely talking about some business issues. 2- He respected my ideas, listened to my view points about different things, he memorized them and once repeated what i have told before to our business partners. 3- He imitated my body language. He greeted me diffrerently and with smiles and i smiled at him in return. But he suddenly stopped flirting and started being totally indifferent like i wasnt there. He completely avoided eye contact with me and talked to me only if it was necessary. I had definitely no idea what was going on. I was confused. He left with no explanation but 2 days later he called our office and asked my collegue to connect him with me and asked me about the project which wasnt really neccesary for him to ask me. The day after i called him to tell him about the question he asked me and he answered but when i introduced myself he couldnt say even a word anymore. The day after we had a business meeting in which he and i attended and others as well. He was again ignoring me and he was very sad, was dressed messy and didnt really was there, in the meeting i mean. In the end, i took the plunge, i somehow told him i liked him and told me that he was just friendly and he meant nothing at all. And i said ok, maybe i was wrong. some day after he text a greeting message to me and i answered the same way. later i sent him an infography picture and he asked me if i knew a good doctor for hair loss problem and talked to me about his problem and i listened to him and i gave him some advice but he stopped texting after 45 minutes of texting without saying goodbye or thank you. Another night he ended up saying this sentence: There is no game for us! Just your imaginations to which i answered: You made it clear to me once and i have a good memory, sir. And i didnt text him anymore, he either it has been 21 days. and havent seen him even. I have no idea about his behaviour. Thank you, in advance, for your advice.

Reply November 12, 2015, 4:16 pm

Anna

there’s this guy in my school that once actually HUGGED for no good reason and he would look at me in a weird way every time I passed by him. Back then I used t be furious at him and I don’t even know why, But as time passed on I slowly started to have the feeling at the back of my head whenever I passed him that told me “I want him to hug me again” and “I hope he looks at me” soon I was just sure I developed a crush on him. At the same time I had this other guy in my maths class that always knew how to make me laugh but didn’t seem to try and be funny in front of the other girl at my table and I caught him staring at me with this weird calm smile that sort of creeped me out but also made me happy in a way. Then I realised these two are friends and that I feel the same way about them! I’m quite worried if the time will ever come that at least one of them ask me out. What if I end their friendship by saying yes? do they really have feelings for me or is it just my imagination? what if they ask me in the same time? and which one do I choose if they do? I know I might sound a little pathetic and all but I’m really not sure please help me

Reply November 4, 2015, 7:21 pm

kat

I work with this guy who just notice recently few months. we talk every now & then. I like him & would like to know him more. I don’t know if he feel the same, he always smile & eye contact w/me…he’s young but just wanna be friends w/him. how to get him more out of the shyness…

Reply September 23, 2015, 6:41 pm

Alexys

Hi, I’m in middle school, the eighth grade to be exact, and I just moved to Old Lyme this summer. I haven’t realized it until just now, but I kind-of like another kid in my school and I think that he likes me back. But I’m not 100% sure… He doesn’t seem to follow any signs that are listed above… but he does find any way to either “bump into me” or to help me… Does that show anything? I just really hope that if he does like me then he will ask me either at the 8th grade formal or before we graduate because we won’t be going to the same high school… PLEASE HELP!!!

Reply June 9, 2015, 1:57 pm

daisha

I think he likes you.

Reply October 18, 2015, 11:33 am

Jenny

Hi guys im looking for some advice on a situation im in. I started hanging out with this guy a couole months back and we get along great. Ive come to really like him and i wont lie and say we dont fool around. We have never had sex but we do mess around a bit. When i asked him what his intentions were and that i wouldnt mind a relationship he didnt tuen me down but rather said that he had just gotte. Out of a relationship where he had had his heart broken and didnt want to rush into something .he said he wanted to take things slow. I was ok with that intially but now im starting to wonder. I really like this guy and i think he likes me i mean he even invited me to go to Florida with him and his friends! But he has talked about not wanting to lead me on which confused me because he had said he wanted to see where it lead and take it slow. I dont know what to do. I really like this guy but i dont want to wind up one if those gir. That he just messes around with. Part if me wants to twll him that we shouldnt fool around even though i want to but i dont know. I had just gotten out of a 2 and a half year relationahip in november soim worried about being led on and then dumped like i meant nothing. What do i do?

Reply May 27, 2015, 5:36 pm

Confused Lah

So I met this guy on the first day of college back in February. He’s really cute but I don’t think that that’s important. Well he was the one who started talking to me and everything and our conversations were never dull although I would feel a little overwhelmed when talking to him because I felt like he’s too hot to be talking to a girl like me. We have spoken about many things even private things. The thing is, I don’t know whether he likes me or not. I have found myself falling for him but I’m getting mixed signals. On all occassions that we have spoken, he was the one that approached me and I have even analyzed the way he is with his other female friends- when we’re together, there’s always a part of our body that’s touching (eg. our legs or shoulders) but with his other female friends there’s always a gap. He started ignoring me and being mean to me recently and I noticed him flirting with my friend so then I just concluded that he didnt like me and everything that I was seeing was in my head, but about a week ago he asked me whether girls like it when guys ignore them and I told him “I don’t know, I guess it depends on the girl. Some girls like to do the chasing and other girls like to be chased” then he asked me,”What about you? How do you feel when I ignore you?” and I said I don’t know then he asked if I like to do the chasing or if I like to be chased then I said I like to be chased then he said “Well I’m not gonna chase you” now ever since that conversation I’ve been left confused. To me I feel like he has dropped a few hints because, he was always the one that approached me, he teased me sometimes, we spoke about many private things, when we spoke to each other he always looked into my eyes and once when I was with my friend that he has been flirting with he pinched my arm and said “hey beautiful” to me but then he was like “Oh I wasn’t talking to you”
We’re facebook friends and I followed him on instagram but he didnt follow me back and he follow-backs everyone
And this might sound weird but he has tried to headbutt me(playfully) multiple times but I always pull away cuz there would be this awkward pause and our faces would be really close to each other (literally noses touching) and he would be looking straight into my eyes
I just dont know whats going on with this guy, some days he’s nice, other days he’s mean and most recently he has been ignoring me

Reply May 18, 2015, 6:28 am

daisha

How about you confront him, let him know how you feel

Reply October 18, 2015, 11:41 am

Skylar

With this guy who Im friends with, but we aren’t quite close enough for the usual (how to tell if a friend likes you stuff or even the friend zone things) there are a lot of mixed signals.can You help me figure out the signs listed in terms of us please?

1 Initiating
He 9 times out of 10 initiated in-person interactions between us, these are way more common than our not-in-person interactions, but I initiate 9-10 technology based contact interactions.

2 Listens and Remembers
He is a good listener, he leans in, and asks questions. He remembers some tiny things from months ago but will forget a conversation the day before.

3 Body Language
His Body language is almost always the clearer sign of his potential interest for me. He leans in, constantly looks for my reactions, points his body to me and touches me. His touches and looks never (well 99% of the time) don’t seem sexual at all. He will tuck my head under his face/chin or wrap me up in hugs to where the stubble on his chin tickles my neck, and we hold hands kinda often but he never has touched my thighs or lower back even when drunk.

4 Acts Different Around You
He acts different when its just us, or just us and his cousin (one of my best friends), really in any different group. And IDK what he is like when Im not there. I also think he acts different towards me. He says my name in one of two ways always and his voice gets softer, I feel like in general he is a little softer/gentler with me… but I think I tend to pull out most guys protective sides in general. while Im really independent and have a feisty side Im very maternal and feminine and make men feel like they should protect me (so Ive been told very often by lots of men) so it could be that…

5 Compliments
He has given me 4 compliments on my appearance, and tends to tease me other times (which are usually times other guys tell me I look good). But with compliments, he has never used pretty, sexy, beautiful. It’s usually “I like…”or you/ your hair looks really good”. Or he has said (teasing) “you look spoiled” then he re-worded it as “you can tell you like nice things by how you dress yourself” usually he more makes me sound cocky… {1) “You dont know how to act when you get your hair freshly done”} {2) “you think you own the beach dont you?” (he grabed the sweater I was wearing, when I said “I dont need your abuse” jokingly he was like “I like it! You look good”}

so as you can see each sign is kinda there so Im having a hard time determining if he does each of the five enough for me to be confident in his interest…

Reply May 15, 2015, 6:02 pm

Shazza

Ok well this is a long story… There is this guy I like… And I have kinda liked him for like 3 years now… And I can’t move on even though last year my friend asked if he liked me and he said we were just good friends… But this year we seem to be a bit closer as friends and he seems to be interested but I’m not sure if I’m just exadurating the signs and I just really need some advice cause my friends just tell me to move on but I can’t… And when I look at posts/pics that say my happy place is with you it makes me want to cry and just die! I get this empty and hollow feeling inside and I just curl up in a ball and try not to think about it… I Don’t Know if he’s just scared about being in a relationship cause his last relationship was with one of my ex-best friends who we have a mutual hate for, and she treated him like crap… Someone please help me… ????

Reply May 6, 2015, 6:59 am

anet minsrolanh

I know a guy, who’s very outgoing, goofy, and very good guy. I mean it when I say he’s good guy,because he’s Christian, like help people, don’t curse, very intelligent, has a gift of speech, and very charming. At the first time we meet with including one of our mutual friends, we were having a great time. I attracted to him at the first sight because he was so handsome, he look Edward from Twillight, I am not kidding. When we first meet I felt like we were flirting to each. We talked like we had known each other before. He said my smile face looks like Keira Knightley. I was stunned by his compliment. The problem is i don’t know that if he treat me the same as everyone else or different. I like me pictures on Facebook, tease me on Facebook, and we chat on Facebook. On time we ended up talking like 5 hours. He wrote me long message, a lot of emojis, many winky faces, he wanted me to sent him picture of me when with my new hair style, he send me picture of weird and funny stuffs and his works, and he the conversation end by his last sentence. One time I texted and asked him why he spend time talking to me, and he said “cuz” then he changed the subject, then I asked him a second time, and he answered “because we’re friends. I was so sad, and maybe angry. Why I was angry? Because in the I felt like he like me too according to the text he sent me. I started to that I can’t be friend with him, which I really like and i don’t want to pretend to be one. I told him that night that we should no longer message on Facebook, I told him I made a mistake, and his reaction was “A mistake?” He said. He went on and called my name, “I don’t understand.” I was very frustrated, I was confused when he said that he didn’t understand. I told him again that I like him since the day we met, and I told him as a second time I said “Please stop texting me, you make this hard to me, we will still talking if I see you in person.” He stubbornly continued sending me his text and screenshots picture to should that his phone lowing the battery, I thought it was cute. The story got was when, he stop to send me after he got ignored by me, and I felt like hell that night. My heart was ached. I couldn’t help myself so I sent an apologize text about what I did to him. He replied me instantly and he said “that was nice to you to apologize, everything is Ok.” From then we started to talk again. I texted him a first each time, I started to feel vulnerable and awkwardness. I screwed up again. I sent him another message of how I felt that he and I shouldn’t talk. It was so stupid of me. It was the weirdest message ever. :(

Reply April 16, 2015, 2:52 am

Serenity

Okay. I have the exact opposite situation then most of the people here. I am fifteen and I have a shitload of guys who like me and I get confessions everyday. I finally got together with a guy just to have a reason to say no. There is a guy in my class who at least according to my friends is the hottest guy in our high school which is pretty small. He is always staring at me and he gives me occasional smiles, the kind guys save for girls. His bestfriend usually tells him that he couldn’t save a seat next to me as he doesn’t want it to be too obvious. Or so I think. We are the only computer students so when ever we are in the computer science class he is always trying to impress me. I have seen him ignoring other girls to look at me. Once my friend caught him staring at me. He blushed bright red, according to her, and then fixed his hair as if hoping I would turn to look at him. A few days ago, he started passing even more smiles. Our school has a strict no contact with the opposite sex rule, it’s Catholic. So we haven’t talked or anything but he has been doing this for almost six months now. I just shifted to this school about Wight months ago. I have also seen him looking at other girls when I am around but that was when it was just us with the computer teacher. I want to tell him somehow that I am not interested. Any ideas on how I should do that?

Reply April 12, 2015, 8:22 am

dallas

I love this guy he may love me he says he does but now hes moving im 17 what do i do?

Reply March 25, 2015, 4:16 pm

payel

I am in love with my professor of my college, but this has become public and he has come to know about this from my friends in public. He has privately asked me for the truth but since i had my parents near me i could not confess it. But now i cant stay well anymore and I had decided to propose him indirectly in a letter. Is it a right decision or not??

Reply March 13, 2015, 11:54 am

hellobaby

im sorry but that is such a stupid move.

Reply March 18, 2015, 6:45 am

Betty

Oh no, that’s not the way… It’s in his kiss, that’s where it is. Shoop shoop shoop shoop.

Reply February 9, 2015, 8:18 pm

hanna

Okay so I’ll try make this short but there is a a lot to say. Basically there’s this guy that I’ve known my whole life,but it wasn’t until I was around 13 I started getting “crushy” feelings about him…and then around the ages 13-15 I had so many crushes as I went through what I call my “crush phase”(man do I cringe) anyway among those crushes he was still there but I never told anyone…for reasons I will touch on further down. Anyway so by the end of 15 years old-16 my feelings intensified in a way I never thought possible. I should touch on a few things before I continue. One I have never have a bf (whether that is good or bad i don’t know) ..we are friends and the reason why this is so hard is because I never acted on my feelings so I have no idea how anyone feels…the biggest factor,for me at least is the age difference of 6 years(bear with)I know its a lot but when I thought about it, its the same as my parents.(I’m 17 ) at first this age gap scared me as I wondered if it was normal to have these feelings. I told two of my closet friends one who found it slightly weird but got it and the other completely understood…since I told them a lot had happened..( one doesn’t realise I still like them but since I’m busy sorting it out for myself I don’t want to say I don’t like or do. Although I totally do. Oh man I do. ) the next thing is that obviously due to the age gap he is further along in education than me and start of 2014 he went to Aussie and it was hard…I found myself in this situation where I thought that him gone for so long would make me move on…if anything a whole year did the opposite….he came back for Xmas and left before the start of this yr and something tells me my feelings won’t change…obviously I still go ..hey that guys cute etc..but its nothing compared to how I feel about him..whenever I think about him I still get butterflies in my chest. Anyway basically… Nobody knew..except my two friends and I have a feeling its always going to be unrequited love. But I’ve never felt so strongly and for so long about someone before..my crushes were like a term or two long… This has been years…Ive had days where I wonder if I am crazy and then days when I’m so 100% sure…more of those of course…he’s always been a part of my life whether it was him messing up my hair to him piggy backing me when I felt faint…seeing him wveryweek 3 times a week ..for music prac . youth group and church.. I just… I’ve tried getting over him and it does not work. I guess I’m just letting this all out….I’m just gonna wait ..for Xmas when I’ll hopefully see him again..above all I just want him to he happy but yeah..sometimes it hurts so bad and the memories ..ah…OK but I’m stopping now before I make a novel..unless that’s too late. I apologize for spelling errors I am on my phone. …and just to all those people out there…no matter what your scenario… Go for it like I never did. And don’t be so fast to let go..sometimes its too late when u realise what you need was right in front of you….also if anyone is in the same situation as me please reply! I’d love to know I’m not alone..and any advice or comments are very much welcome…otherwise have a nice day. Enjoy reading this and bye ????

Reply February 9, 2015, 3:53 am

Sophia

I really want to have a boyfriend! Even though i might be different and unique and just plan boring sometimes i sure do hope a guy likes me someday. Jehovah will help me with the problems that i go through and that iv’e been through already. I feel very very blessed. What i always say is if a man doesn’t think your pretty then there’s something wrong with HIM.
-Sophia

Reply January 27, 2015, 2:51 pm

Sophia

I really want to have a boyfriend! Even though i might be different and unique and just plan boring sometimes i sure do hope a guy likes me someday. Jehovah will help me with the problems that i go through and that iv’e been through already. I feel very very blessed. What i always say is if a man doesn’t think your pretty then there’s something wrong with HIM.
-Sophia J.

Reply January 27, 2015, 2:50 pm

Shaz

I have been living with this guy for a year now. He asked me to move in with him after 6 months of dating. I’ve met all his family members, attended family gatherings, etc. We’re planning on getting married this christmas. What i don’t understand is, sometimes when i am on duty travels, he makes plans to travel to other cities and let’s me know like on the day or a day before his departure. I also realised that he doesn’t give me gifts or take me out or remember special occassions. The funny thing is he hasn’t met my family. He talks of meetng them and made an effort but one the day we got into an arguement and just forgot the whole idea. He never talks about it again. Last time, i saw a booking he made to fly to Brisbane for 5days and this is around the time that i get to do my next duty travel. He hasn’t told me about this trip yet. Aren;t people living together in a relationship not supposed to keep secrets?
I don’t understand this… Does he really love me? If he doesn’t then why does he want me to live with him and marry him even… I don’t understand this! PLease somebody out there help me understand this person…

Reply January 22, 2015, 6:29 pm

IrishEyes2c

Oh, honey this doesn’t sound good at all. If I were you I would look for an apartment. Tell him that it bothers you and if he is evasive or won’t answer the question, avoids eye contact with you, then there is something very wrong. I wouldn’t want you to not have an alternative place to live. I don’t trust most people in general and he sounds fishy. Is he in the military too? Think with your head and not your heart and the answer will be there.

Reply March 21, 2015, 4:35 pm

mary

I believe since the relationship have move to the exclusive one it should be no secret with both of you hold off from marriage see what happen.

Reply December 18, 2016, 4:45 pm

Cristal

So this guy is constantly talking to me and he tries to touch me accidently he even lays his head in my desk and pushes his legs up against mine, he’s always there for me and I’m always there for him. Yet he’s only there for me regarding school. AND he has a girlfriend although I can tell he really likes me and he’s not once mentioned his gf in front of me. He’s gorgeous and amazing, but he’s taken. She’s really pretty too. I have no idea what to do

Reply January 18, 2015, 8:03 pm

britney

Let him go he has a gf

Reply January 3, 2016, 7:16 pm

Jordan

Theres a guy in my life that I work with who acts EXACTLY like this but he never asks me out outside of work so a large part of me doesn’t really believe he likes me…

Reply January 9, 2015, 7:36 pm

Sue

Dear innocent people
If someone likes or loves you for real! They will hang around you like a fly around food…and many more signs. But better than signs don’t assume they like you, don’t fall for them unless their own mouth tells you to your face : ” I love you”.

Reply January 3, 2015, 4:08 pm

Sares

This is so helpful, thanks! But I need some serious guy advice!
I have been hanging out with this guy for a couple of months. He is super shy (both self admitted and told to me by friends). I met him in January but he didn’t really talk to me in any real way until August. We have been hanging out first fortnightly then weekly and now a few times a week since then. We’ve had what my friends call “sneaky dates” where we have started by just hanging out to do a work related task together and then he’s taken me somewhere lovely (think candles and proper restaurant) for dinner. For Christmas he bought me the most thoughtful gift from my favourite shop – despite him not being into Christmas (his family give cash not gifts). He calls me every day – sometimes two or three times a day. All of these signs tell me he likes me.
But then he has made no move on me. He talks about how he’s never been happier than when he broke up with his ex (as he doesn’t have to “check in” with anyone anymore and he can do what he wants whenever he wants) and he talks about “hot” women (not in a dating sense just how hot they are and how he should get some) He is completely respectful to me so I don’t feel like he is friend zoning me – I just don’t understand what message he’s trying to give me when he talks about picking up a hot chick (note he hasn’t actually made any move on these girls and doesn’t even talk to other women when I’m around!)
So guys out there – what’s your advice? What do I do?!
Thanks in advance!

Reply December 28, 2014, 6:44 pm

juno

Ask him out. He’s shy and he’s giving you hints that he likes you. Shy guys have a really hard time breaking out of that shell and making the move. So maybe you should make the move if you like him back. Ask him directly if he likes you and wants to try dating you. He’ll appreciate your honesty and find it easier to open up to you once you break the barrier.

Reply December 30, 2014, 2:40 pm

happiness

Hey! im just a curious abt something hahaha. but its just that this guy in my school..i mean..we dont even talk (well,only during my orientation day in my school when he asked im from which country) that moment onwards ive had this tingly crush on him till today. No progress. Its okay. The thing is we always bump into each other everyday in school be it at the canteen or library. This is when it starts to get interesting. We would secretly look at each other (nope,im not daydreaming but we usually caught each oher looking at the other) but no smiles just a straight face and this happen all the time. Sometimes when we’re alone we would be in the other’s face like walkng close by etc hahaaha. Its kinda fun actually and its a mystery as well. The other day i was standing in front of the counter where they put napkins there and out of nowhere this guy came without even saying excuse me just took the tissue like its nothing. mannnn i go crazy everyday with these gestures. what is thissssss

Reply November 23, 2014, 7:07 am

mary

Great “post!!”

Reply December 6, 2014, 1:54 am

dehwl

ass mannnn

Reply December 18, 2014, 7:42 am

please help

I knew this guy Seince 5th grade. In 5th grade my friend told me he liked me. Now in 6th grade during gym I was talking about this other guy because my friend was wondering how I knew him and the guy I knew science 5th grade looked back at me and overheard me talking about this other guy and now he stopped talking to me. Doe he still like me or is he jealous that I was talking about another guy? Please help me .

Reply November 15, 2014, 11:57 am

It sucks

You should go tell him you like him, that is if you do. He is probably jealous & still likes you & thinks you like the guy you were talking about. I know because it happened to me but I was too late in telling him Iike him & so he kind of moved on. Our friendship suffered because of jealousy, he did say hi to me today but it was brief, no more long conversations, we seem like acquaintances now, it sucks.

Reply March 4, 2015, 12:33 am

SingleANDHappy

Speaking as someone who has been completely single for the past 20 years and will stay that way, I do NOT understand the headline of this article.

The headline says “5 Telltale Signs He Likes You,” and then the first thing says this:

“He initiates- If you’re at a party, he comes up to you and strikes up a conversation.”

So you’ve never met and are already talking about “liking” someone? There is NO way to know if you like someone just by seeing them with your eyes. Seeing is “physical attraction,” especially if you have never met. It’s not “like.”

The only way to know if you LIKE someone is a whole lotta talking to one another, watching how they react to you and others in different situations, etc. Stay away from ANYTHING physical/sexual and just talk with them. A lot. Then you’ll know if you like them or they like you.

Reply November 12, 2014, 11:06 pm

mary

Absolutely, SingleANDHappy! NO doubt! Yep! U bet ya! Now, THAT’S the “way” to “do” it–finding out if someone likes you or not!!–

Reply December 28, 2014, 10:42 pm

sara

I’m going through some relationship issues and I need major help.
I’ve been dating a guy since 6 months and everything seemed great at first but then things started changing. I know I made a mistake by being very needy and kept bugging him. Above all I used to talk to my friends about my relationship issues and obe day he read my conversation and got pissed but that eventually got sorted. 3 days back he told me he isn’t over his ex as it was a long relationship of 3 years and he needed time. When he started with me he was ready to move on but my behavior is disturbing him and now he thinks we rushed things and should have gotten to know each other as he isn’t able to figure out how to handle me. He asked me to start over as friends. I clearly asked him if he was seeing is ex again but he denied it and said that he is with me only . Also he agreed when I asked that what he wants is that we remain in a relationship but kind off take a break as friends. Anyways then I didn’t contact him and after one day just one day he texts me and tells me he misses me. And then he asks me

“What if after some time I want to get back with you. And you like someone else”

And he at one point is calling me his girl and at the same time a friend. He made it clear he’s doing it so that when a guy asks me if I’m single I have no reply. I really like him. We’re having casual talks and i think we might connect at a different level this time. Right now we’re having major exams and maybe he’s stressed out or something? I’m so confused about what he wants. I really really like this guy and I want him back in my life. Please please help me out and tell me how to get him back
Then we were also having a conversation about a random topic and he said that happens between couples. So I said so we’re not a couple and he’s like we’re on a break. I don’t know what’s going on And it’s effecting me and my studies

Reply November 7, 2014, 11:09 pm

Bo

Hi, I am sorry you are going through this and I understand how confusing it can be. I think you should really focus on yourself and with school. He is being selfish in the sense that he wants to keep you only for later and wants a relationship with you only on his own time, which is very unfair for you and you shouldn’t let him treat you like this. I believe you deserve a better person who is willing to be with you whole-heartedly and to put you first. I am sorry if this is not what you want to hear, but I truly believe that you should focus on yourself and just take a step back and re-evaluate this situation. It is hard but you will be able to get through this :)

Reply November 15, 2014, 1:52 am

Gracie

My crush always does the following(according to my very observant best friend and myself);
-He always stares at me
-He always smiles at me
-Always laughs when around me
-Checked me out three times
-Went behind me really close so I could feel his body on mine
-Found out my sister once told me to kill myself (happened a lot more before but he only knows about the one time) and got really pale
-Sat in front of me during lunch once and I wasn’t eating so he looked away and bit his lip
-When my tank top was falling he was looking at my chest and biting his lip
-He saw me writing something and looked at the top where it said “Suicide Notes.” And he got pale again
-I was showing my friend something on the computer (Demi a quote she said) and he leaned foward to see what I was showing her and smiled a little ( he knows I’m a little [I am actually a lot insecure but he doesn’t know] and it said “I like my booty and thighs. I have curves get over it.)
-He sits in front of me in science and during a video he kicked my feet twice lightly and in the same video it said Turquie so his friend whispered something in his ear and he blushed and looked at me
-He asked me if I still liked one direction and when I nodded and said my name is Gracie Horan he looked kind of (just a little) jealous
– During a project he stood next to me and brushed his arm against mine (he always does that)
– He always stares at me when I walk into the room in the morning
– I went into my ELA class shouting LARRY SHIPPER (DON’T HATE ME I SHIP ELOUNOR TOO) he looked at me and 5 minutes later I looked at him and he was looking at me still
– At the beginning of lunch he was walking towards my friend and I and staring at me the whole time he was talking to us
– One day last year he was absent in math but came back to school for the afternoon and when I was walking to get my paper from the printer he asked me if there was any homework and because I finished it I said no (each time I think I’m done with what he’s been doimg for the past 3 years I’m like nope there’s that one too lol)
– There was an activity in math where I had to pretend to be a guy named Dally Winston from The Outsiders the next day he math he wouldnt stop talking to me about it and my friend teased me about of course she was in our math class wiggling her eyebrows when he kept talking

Reply October 27, 2014, 8:35 pm

Gracie

Torque sounds like twerk btw

Reply October 27, 2014, 10:46 pm

Sara

I got a match on Tinder with this cutie on July 3rd. He’s absolutely adorable, and honestly the most amazing man I could ever imagine God sending me. There are only a few things that make this too good to be true: 1) I’ve never dated a younger guy before just for the maturity sake, I am a very mature 23 year old and I’ve been in and out of long and hard relationships and I am no longer up to playing games. He is 22 and though it scares me, it seems he has his life figured out and he is pretty darn mature. 2) He is in the army. I love our troops and honestly I am really into this guy and I would gladly support him in whatever, but we all know the army guys have a reputation for being dogs. 3) He is getting out of the army around May and is moving to a different state.

I know this already sounds crazy and believe me once finding all of this out I expressed my concerns to him early on. I plainly said I think you are a great guy, but frankly I’m not up to getting to know you in that type of way if you are moving next year, because I don’t want to fall in love with you and then there be no us after May. He basically said he is not the type to fall in love and leave and to give him a chance so I did. The first week he wanted to meet me and of course considering I hadn’t been talking to him that long I was too shy and told him I was busy. He left for 14 days on leave visiting family and friends and then once he got back we kept trying to make plans and things kept coming up on my end unfortunately. I constantly apologized and would try to still meet up on another day, well finally we got the chance to meet, and I swear if you could fall in love on a first date I was probably there. This guy was everything I’ve been praying for and he is absolutely more than perfect. The date was amazing and of course I did something I have never done before and I let him stay over. I’m never that type of girl and I assure you nothing went on but a bunch of snuggling. (PERFECT DATE).

He seemed just as into me as I was into him, he constantly texted me and complimented me, it couldn’t have been any better. Then all of a sudden I noticed this other girl on his fb, instagram and snapchat. I tried not to worry because he hasn’t given me a reason to, but due to my last relationship full of being cheated on I can’t but help to worry. This girl eventually ended up being his number one on snapchat, still not a big issue right?! Well we made plans for that Saturday but the closer it came to it he began to become distant, he texted me Friday saying how much he hated his job and how he had punishment on Saturday for the army and wouldn’t be able to see me. His punishment was a 24 hr duty, well later Saturday when I got home and got on Facebook I saw this picture of him at a white trash bash. The party was just a small gathering of him and his buddies with a few of their wives and gfs, but still I felt like I had been lied to and blown off. I waited for him to text and basically he fibbed about it I believe and I just went off. I explained that I am an understanding girl and that if he had plans all he had to do was explain the party came up and could he see me Sunday or even invite me to go. I mean I wouldn’t have cared just don’t blow me off and don’t lie to me. Well he apologized a million times and I told him to drop it and he continued to apologize so I believe he was sincere about it. Then he made plans to see me Sunday and of course right before he left he got a migraine (he gets them all the time and takes medication for it) so I just tried to dismiss it in my mind as the truth.

I still felt he was being distant that week and I confronted him and just basically said look you know I am really into you (we’ve both already admitted it) but I just want to be sure you are even looking for anything considering you are moving possibly for good next year, because I don’t want to fall for you and you not even be interested in having anything. He replied back,” I want to see where things go. I really like you, but I’ve had relationship mess up fast in the past and I don’t want that to happen to us.” so I tried easing my mind a little. We ended up seeing each other that Friday and I hate to admit it because I’m seriously a good girl, but things kind of went too far and we slept together. I regret it sooooooo much because that’s just not who I am. It wasn’t either of our intentions as we’ve both only prior been with 3 people all super long relationships.

After that he seemed to be a lot better, we they have been super busy at work and I seriously am a very understanding girl, but he just seemed to fade away again, I confronted him the past Friday once more, because I am a straight up girl. I plainly said look I think you are an amazing guy but I don’t feel you are that into me, and that’s fine if that’s the case and once again he assured me he is into me just super busy. He said he will put in more effort and he promises after all this training we will spend lots more time together.

Here is my thing though. As you all can tell I fell really fast for this guy, I feel like I’ve known him my whole life and I am serious about him. I have already thought about careers I could do with my degree if things worked out and I moved with him. I know it sounds a little crazy but seriously I feel like God sent him to me.

Now on the flip side, I believe he is a great guy and he is sincere but honestly I have been hurt so much before I feel like maybe he is just saying that to appease me and that in fact he maybe likes me but definitely isn’t looking for anything. I just believe if a guy is into you that he will make time to see you. And we’ve been texting for 2 months and we’ve only talked on the phone a handful and face timed once and only hung out 2 times. I am beginning to get super bummed and I feel like I am getting mixed signals. I am so scared because I know I am falling super hard super fast and I don’t know what to do. I like him entirely too much to quit talking to him because I already couldn’t imagine my days without him, but I don’t want to be strung along to fall in love and then after May there be no more me and him.

PLEASE HELP ME!!!! =((

Reply September 17, 2014, 11:19 am

Lou

This for guys only.
The truth is that if a woman is interested in you SHE will find a way to make you aware of it. If you do what the writer says you will do if you are interested you will be dead meat.
The choice is made by the woman, always. Especially in the case of very attractive women. In fact, the more attractive a woman is the less obvious you should be about your interest. Nothing is less attractive to a woman than a man she knows she has conquered from the start.
Remember this, from the moment of meeting her nothing will ever happen between you two that she does not want to happen. Deal with it because it’s true.
We all know the old saying that ” it’s a man’s world “, right ? Wrong. When it comes to the world of romance it is exactly the other way around.

Reply September 5, 2014, 4:56 pm

Thomas Chimera

It seems to me that romance is the kind of thing that happens — more times than not — at first sight. You can build to it like I suppose is the adult thing to do, but to me the whole scrambled eggs of it is less a reasonable thing in your head than it’s some form of cupid’s magic. Of course if the magic dust does at first favor you with it’s presence, despite man’s innate efforts to mess it up, somehow the sleight of hand just never lets that damn rabbit in the hat ever die. Peace.

Reply September 4, 2014, 8:57 pm

dharani

hi guys!!!!!am in big confusion,pls help me on thz,am loving one guyz,he also accepted it,we used to chat at late nights,we continue thz fa one month,but now he is telling me”we stop talking fa 6 months” i dono what to do,bcoz i really love him a lot,wat to do guys??!!!

Reply September 3, 2014, 8:22 am

CT

Well, you could start by PUTTING THE F—ING CELL PHONE DOWN FOR A FEW HOURS A DAY!!!! GOD!! You text so much it has taken over for your actual language!! You abreviate thz, and fa, whatever they are….if you meant “this” for “thz” you’re way off the mark, and yet you don’t abreviate “months” (mos.), or continue (cont.), among others. I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt because it very likely that English is not your first language – I hope!!

Reply October 20, 2014, 10:33 am

CT

I mis-spelled “abbreviate”. Oops!

Reply October 20, 2014, 10:36 am

Jessica

I’m looking for insight I’ll almost certainly never obtain from anyone other than the very person who has perplexed me for over 30 years now! Yes, 30 years! This man has to be the shiest person in the world! When a mutual friend introduced us back in the ’60’s we were both 20-something and single. (He asked her for introduction to me.) I had been involved with a different man for about 3 years but he was gone for several months establishing a business when I met Mr. Shy and we started seeing each other. Our mutual friend warned me that Mr. S. was abnormally shy (but ONLY) with women. I could tell and tried to reassure him with smiles, body language even though the man barely said a word all the times we were together. (BTW: we were never involved sexually.) Without seeming full of myself, I need to say that I was unusually attractive and never lacked for guys falling all over me. Needless to say, I was not used to a man who just smiled at me like he could eat me up, and kiss me a few times, but never ever talked about anything. He had everything a man could wish for so I am completely baffled as to why he should feel shy (scared?) around women. And, although he was quiet and well-mannered, he did not appear bashful or socially uncomfortable with others. After a few get-togethers, I became very flustered as to if he truly liked me or if not, why he kept seeing (only?) me. In my frustration, I made a couple of really, really, bad choices. The first one: After an evening of social drinking & music, I told him the only reason I was seeing him was because he reminded me of my boyfriend (they did look almost identical except for height). That wasn’t true at all but I just wanted to see his reaction. He didn’t show any!!! Just kept smiling that beautiful smile. The end to our relationship(?) came when his band had one last gig and he said: “You’re going to be there, aren’t you?” I looked at him and replied: “I don’t know. Good-bye Mel.” I chose to not attend the last session deliberately. I figured if he WAS interested, he’d call and ask me why I wasn’t there. Well, he didn’t call. Our mutual friend was present at his last performance and he asked her and she told him what I had told her earlier when she wanted to know why I wasn’t joining our girlfriends for our usual Friday night out: “I have my reasons.” That was it. In all the years since, I’ve never even ONCE run into him in this medium-sized city we share. I’ve tried to get information about him–if he was married, children? Anything. But there are no records that show he ever married, divorced, was widowed, had any children and, in fact, a friend of a friend who knows him said Mel has never married. We’re both old now. He lives only about 5 miles from where I do–each in our own homes. I married the old boyfriend because he insisted on getting married which was not what I wanted but I figured I ought to be doing what all my friends were doing but that was also a big, huge mistake. I divorced him within 3 years of the so-called marriage and reared our child practically alone. I’ve dated a lot and been socially active, but I’ve never remarried and, in my old age, realize I still love Mel. I don’t want anyone but him. Is it possible to be sooooooo shy as to live your entire life alone? Never marry or have family? Surely that isn’t normal. I’m beginning to toy with the idea that perhaps Mel’s shyness is much more severe than just bashfulness–could it be a form of Autism? Or some other complication? I feel bad he has (seemingly) missed out on so much love and intimacy at the same time I feel even worse imagining what a loving life we might have had together. Is it really better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all? –Jessica

Reply August 24, 2014, 5:53 pm

tacara-mi

#1. Instead of all the hinting and trying to decipher “signals,” just ask him. If he likes you he’ll tell you. If you like him, then tell him. stop playing the games and be straightforward.

Reply August 24, 2014, 2:43 pm

Amanda

Ok so there’s this guy I’ve known for a few months now and we hang out at school at couple times a week, there was recently a game and he won king so I took a picture with him and when we hugged he pulled me really close to him like he jerked me into him. Then there was a dance the next night we got more pictures together the first time he kinda hid his hand under my arm and touched me breast and the second time he put it right under but still touched it. Then we met up at school a few days after and he was staring in my eyes for a few minutes and he started blushing and froze up. I think he likes me but it’s hard to tell because we’re 3 years apart so I don’t know if he likes me. I been thinking about asking him out but I just want to make sure he likes me and if its a good idea.

Reply March 15, 2015, 9:49 am

Sarah

What if he is always acting strange around you, listens and remember about the things you have to say but has a girlfriend. He could be spending time with her he even said he doesnt get a lot of time with her but spends it with me instead. I dont know what to do.

Reply August 5, 2014, 3:30 am

april

Maybe he likes you more than his girlfriend and wants to go out with you instead

Reply November 15, 2014, 12:00 pm

Toma

I need advice . Me and my ex boyfriend . And then he abruptly broke up with me . And then I found out from his and I BestFriend that he started dating his best friend . And my ex boyfriend and I had a healthy relationship . And then I also learned from our common best friend that my ex is confused about who he likes more , me or his best friend . I don’t know . What to do . Help ! Please

Reply August 2, 2014, 7:00 am

Maria Gomez

i just started talking to this guy which i forgot all about but he found me on facebook i really like him but im so confused about his feelings for me he had not text me for 3 days so i decided to text him and tell him it was obvious he didnt like me in a manner i did him so that we would remain freinds that if he needed a freind to talk to i would always be there for him anyways he text me back put a sad face crying and asked if i was dumping him its things like this that makes me so confused about his feelings i asked if he was back with his ex which i know hes not happy at all with but he doesnt respond to my question and when i tell him he was posibly with some other girl he tells me theres no.other girls could you tell me what this means

Reply July 30, 2014, 12:15 am

ken

You’ll get further confirmation of this if he remembers the things you told him: where you went to high-school, your major in college, the name of your first pet – and uses the information to hack into your bank account.

Reply July 27, 2014, 10:16 am

Marty

Can this ever be rectified? I am a woman, 73. In my mid-twenty’s, through a mutual friend, I met and dated a single man my age. It was an apparent mutual attraction but I got impatient because the man is incredibly shy around women and I couldn’t get him to talk much or express himself. In ignorance and inexperience with this kind of personality, I made a couple of BIG mistakes in trying to get him to make his feelings known to me. In so doing, I stood him up on a night of great importance and I never heard from him again. I have been kicking my own butt for 50 years! I still love him, even after marrying, having a child, and divorcing another. I have remained single since my divorce 43 years ago and, as nearly as I can tell from asking around, checking public records, etc., he has never married. We live in the same town, not too far from each other; we’re both retired successful business people who’s homesteads reflect our compatibility. I’m sure he will never, ever contact me and I’m too unsure of myself, embarrassed, etc., to contact him. Is there any hope of us ever getting back together? I would like nothing more than to live the rest of my life making him happy. Any advice? Please email me with your thoughts.

Reply July 26, 2014, 7:19 pm

Prayed up

So 2001 new divorce meets hot guy tells him don’t fall in love . He is younger than me I didn’t want to give him a ready made life I wanted him to live and then decide. This worked perfect for five years no strings I had boyfriends during that time I’m sure he dated but we were just comfort and passion. We finally talked about dating for real after six years. He told me of his last dating experience in which he was stabbed hate to say she was crazy she stabbed him went to jail .. He is a gentle guy fast forward we are happy happy . He and I are supposed to meet out and instead I get a call that he can’t see me he is having a baby. Crazy stabbing girl was five months pregnant. I said good luck prayed for him and stayed away. We ran into eachother and just froze I pretty much ran away from him. He called right away it was crazy to have those feeling and not act but we didn’t . We did stay in touch a year later they broke up we were together since then it’s just been he keeps falling for her suicide crazy bullshit he goes back thinking it’s good for his child we see eachother all the time she knows she has always known about me. So now I’m the homewrecker and everyone’s heart is broken . He wants to be with me I’m his happiness but the guilt and the games the things she says to his child it’s just eating me up. I have prayed and trying to leave it alone.

Reply July 17, 2014, 8:32 am

Dan

The crazy girl probably has a cluster B personality disorder. Your guy friend needs to have as limited contact with her as possible, and needs to start collecting evidence so that he can get full custody of the child. He needs to do it now before he ends up in jail or dead!!!

Reply October 17, 2014, 11:59 am

caitlin

I’ve read all the emails and tried to understand the guy I’ve been talking to. We have actually discussed this and he flat out told me but it seems that he really don’t know what he want truthfully. He told me he wasn’t over his ex fiancé and he does like me and has since high school also I understand that’s happen, hes busy at work or I’m at work. I don’t text him all the time first most the time he texts first. I really like him and I’ve never liked anyone ever(liked the thought of some guys) but I don’t want anyone else and that I just want him but I can’t wait forever. I believe him that he’s not over his ex, but here’s the kicker he’s brought up the topic of having children with me.

Reply July 15, 2014, 3:24 pm

caitlin

I’ve read all the emails and tried to understand the guy I’ve been talking to. We have actually discussed this and he flat out told me but it seems that he really don’t know what he want truthfully. He told me he wasn’t over his ex fiancé and he does like me and has since high school also I understand that’s happen, GE’s is busy at work or I’m at work. I don’t text him all the time first most the time he texts first. I really like him and I’ve never liked anyone ever(liked the thought of some guys) but I don’t want anyone else and that I just want him but I can’t wait forever. I believe him that he’s not over his ex, but here’s the kicker he’s brought up the topic of having children with me.

Reply July 15, 2014, 3:24 pm

Katlyn

Yes, i would like to know how to tell if a guy likes you through texting. There is this guy i like and there is a chance he likes me too. but the only way we talk is through texting. he lives 30 minutes away and we both work. and he tells me im cute and funny and we send the little kissing emojis to each other. but…. idk. please help me!

Reply July 12, 2014, 5:09 pm

Amber

I have been with this guy for 2 months. I think I’ve already fallin for him but I don’t know if he feels the same way. We met online and we live in the same town. I messaged him on a website and in a day I heard from him. We stayed up all night talking and the very next night he took me out on a date. But after that I didn’t hear from him for a week than when I finally got a hold of him he said he had a family problem. Which I understand and forgave him. Than we talked all the time. He’s a truck driver and he’s gone for a week at a time which I’m completely fine with. He would text me when he woke up, called me all the time, and we would talk for hours but that’s when he was on the road. He’s been home for three weeks now and I’ve only seen him twice. He says he wants to be with me and wants to be together and sees us being together for a very long time maybe even getting married and have a kid. But when he’s home its like I don’t exist and I have to text or call him to be able to talk to him. We make plans but something always seems to happen on his side. I haven’t heard from him for a week and its like the second or third time that its been a week that I haven’t heard from him. Ive met a few of his friends but not his mother he says he wants us to meet. I have talked to his mother over text tho but it was really just her saying he was asleep and she would have him call me when he woke. And she knows that were in a relationship. I just feel like he’s not interested and I could really use some help please. Please help me? :(

Reply July 5, 2014, 3:06 am

Kathleen

I have been talking to this guy for a few months. We met at work and had a connection from the start. We had some of the same friends, so when I was with them he was there to. We would be near each other almost the hole time. We become closer as friends. I began to get feelings for him. One day I just told him, I mean what’s the worst that could happen, he doesn’t like me back. He ended up saying he did like me to, but wanted to get to no each other more, and he didn’t want to be in a relationship at the time. We got even closer. We could tell each other everything and everything. We talked about possibly being together in the future but he wasn’t ready yet. He asked me to be patient with him. He said he wasn’t talking to anyone else just me. He had a bad day one night and he asked if I could go for a walk with him, I did. This was the first time we hung out by our selfs. We bumped into each other a few times. I played the I’m scared card cause it was dark out and there was a noise. I grabbed his arm and he smiled at me. We ended up holding hands the rest of the night. He ended up walking ahead of me for a second and I said don’t leave me. He told me he never would. He would say little cute things like that. After i left he texted me and said that my hand felt amazing in his and that he had a great night. He told me he appreciated me being there for him. I told him whenever he needs me I’m here. Went on another walk a few days later and this time he kissed me. When I left he called me and said he missed me already and wish we had more time to spend together. We talked all night. One night he told me I was perfect and between us it always will be. We used to talk all day, but the past few months he has been distant. We only talk at night now. But not every night. And it seems like it’s always sexual. We haven’t hooked up yet, but have talked about it. And every time we try to make plans to chill the next day he never texts me back with a time to meet up. I asked him if we’re ok, and if he actually did want to see me and he yea he does. We made plans for the next night after I got out of work. I again texted him and he never texted back. He texted me at 4 am saying he was sorry he didn’t hit me up to chill, and that he wanted to make it up to me. At this point I’m not getting my hopes up with seeing him. That was a week ago and I still haven’t seen him. At this point I feel like he doesn’t even like me anymore. I no that we aren’t together so I can’t expect to be any type of priority. Should I ask him what’s up, and if he still feels the same way, or should I just back off and let him come to me? Do you think he has moved on? Please help!

Reply July 2, 2014, 10:32 am

Things are getting better. Still working things out but I'm being patient and I keep reading your emails and the books I ordered.

Thanks for the help. I’m learning a lot.

Reply June 21, 2014, 10:35 pm

al

#6- His tongue is in your ear.

Reply June 21, 2014, 2:53 pm

keke

this is keke and ur are dumb if u let him put his tongue in ur ear shit i woukd let him lick my pussy ok dummy

Reply April 15, 2015, 2:27 pm

JAZ

So I been dating this guy for about 5 months, in the start he was all about seeing me all the time we are now in a serious relationship and we’ve met eachothers families, he travels a lot for work… I’m just wishing he was more attentive as far as communicating more sometimes I feel like we are strangers like talk for about 5 mins a day we both have busy Careers but after work. IDK he hasn’t been in a relationship in over 5yrs and I’m the 1st girl he gave a chance to… He’s use to hanging with his friends and working… Not making a woman his Priority. I’m amazing to him i just want the same effort put forth. What do I do trying to have patience only because he not use to it but am I kidding myself?

Reply June 17, 2014, 4:27 pm

Middi

Hello Jaz,

I sense your pain and frustraion as I read your post.

I would encourage you to talk with him, and let him know how you’re truly feeling. Point out all of the good things that you love about him, and let him know that you appreciate him. Remember men are more sensitive then us women..so tred carefully, but be 100% HONEST about how you feel.

He sounds like a good guy…perhaps he’s not aware of how you are reallying feeling. Let him know
that you’re hurt that he’s spends more time with his friends and career than you. Tell him to ‘Put himself in your place’…”how would he feel it things were reverse?”

Since people are rasied differently and come from various walks of life…he may not be ‘aware’ of his
actions. So let him know how you feel, and telll him *what he can do to make you feel more loved, etc.

Now I will throw this in here: He may not really be interested in you anymore, and just doesn’t want to hurt your feelings buy telling you he’s over you. He may have another girl; or it could just simply be that he has so much stress at work, that he needs to hang with the guys to relieve stress, and doesn’t want to bring that stress over to you. I only mention that because he only has 5 mins a day to talk to you??? That doesn’t sound right. No matter how stressed, or angry, etc., a person in a relationship is…they will speak more thatn 5 mins a day. If you care about somebody..YOU MAKE THE TIME..because you WANT TO…Period!

But this next part is KEY: Just state how your feel..DO NOT GUESS/ASSUME ANYTHING & DO NOT PUT ANYWORDS IN HIS MOUTH. Because he might take one of your fears and use that as an excuss to end the realtionship.

So inconclusion dear..BE HONEST…DON’T BE AFRAID. It’s better you get this out in the open quickly so the problem can be remedied, or you can move on. If the latter is the case…FEAR NOT,
you sound like a very caring and loving person..you will find your true love!

Peace and Blessing
:)

Reply June 21, 2014, 6:37 am

JAZ

Hey Middi,
We are Actually doing Great we spoke and yes He’s trying to get use to having someone, He actually been amazing after we spoke and he Feared loosing me our Love for eachother is Growing daily 6months in and I think we are Growing Stronger thxxx!

Reply July 15, 2014, 3:35 pm

Middi

Great News!
Good luck and God Bless the both of you.
Keep the lines of communication open!
:D

Reply July 18, 2014, 7:49 pm

Shaz

Hi Middi, i see you’ve got really good insight in dealing with relationship. I need your advice…

I have been living with this guy for a year now. He asked me to move in with him after 6 months of dating. I’ve met all his family members, attended family gatherings, etc. We’re planning on getting married this christmas. What i don’t understand is, sometimes when i am on duty travels, he makes plans to travel to other cities and let’s me know like on the day or a day before his departure. I also realised that he doesn’t give me gifts or take me out or remember special occassions. The funny thing is he hasn’t met my family. He talks of meetng them and made an effort but one the day we got into an arguement and just forgot the whole idea. He never talks about it again. Last time, i saw a booking he made to fly to Brisbane for 5days and this is around the time that i get to do my next duty travel. He hasn’t told me about this trip yet. Aren;t people living together in a relationship not supposed to keep secrets? I don’t understand this… Does he really love me? If he doesn’t then why does he want me to live with him and marry him even… I don’t understand this! PLease help me understand this person…

January 22, 2015, 6:52 pm

Brian

Did any of you women ever consider that a Guy may like you, even love you but prefer to be social with his guy friends? Or even GASP! with no one?

Reply June 26, 2014, 3:21 pm

middi

Yes Brian, but there is a big difference between spending time with your friends socially, and totally ignoring your mate. For example; If he’s spending every weekend with his friends and only calling his girlfriend to talk for 5 mins a day with no face time(meaning meeting in person, not an apple device)…then there’s a problem.
At this point she can either continue to be ignored, or talk to him honestly about her feelings (if indeed as you mentioned ‘he loves her’), or she can leave him and find someone who will spend time with her. Because let’s face it, you date someone to what? Spend time with them right? It seems for the lady I was trying to help, something’s not right, and a simple conversation with the one you love, would shed light on the situation. I hope it works out for them both.
Peace and Blessings

Reply June 27, 2014, 11:21 pm

JAZ

Brian,

When a man is Truly interested no one can Keep them away not even Friends, Most of his friends are in Relationships as well. I agree he should always have his space and his Boy time I would never take that away from him… Healthy Relationships require that. I would prefer my man wanting to be with me if Not I think there is an issue No?

Reply July 15, 2014, 3:38 pm

patricia

I’ve been with this guy off an on now for a year.we lived together for 9 months. Then he broke up with me. we wrote engaged
He told me he was moving on and with another girl two days later. well that was in Jan she went to jail in in April hr was at my door step that same say she went to jail
We’ve been together off an on ever since we stayed together for one month as friends with benefits then I told him I couldn’t do it anymore and I didn’t want to see him. Well three weeks went by he started calling and texting me again we got back together this time and we was just going tsee what happened OK until know we had a fight four days ago and I having talked to him told him to leave me alone I’m scared I’m being used until she gets out of jail which will be in about 4 more months if I knew he wouldn’t leave me as soon as she gets out I could be happy but I don’t know that and I’m scared love him because I think he’s using Mr for sex. Told him I cant handle being with him one month and being happy then one week sad then one month Happy its to much back and forth I can’t handlevitvno more he needs to decide what he wants. And who he wants I’m so miserable without him my heart aching for him and I mids him so much don’t know should I give up or fight to be with him I have four months left with him irvwithout him I’m so hurt and confused as to what to do

Reply June 15, 2014, 8:47 pm

Middi

My Dear Patricia,

Leave him. Please trust me on this. He is USING YOU. You’re instinct is right. Listen to your “inner voice” it will never steer you wrong! I know it’s hard when you’re in love, but you DESERVE to be LOVED in RETURN! An OFF & ON relationship is NO relationship at all. If he truly cared for you, he would stick by you and try to work things out. Or at the very least..be HONEST about his feelings. And this ‘friends w/ benefits’ thing…There is NO SUCH THING! Because a REAL Friend would have more RESPECT (sing it Areatha! ;) for you and would never even think of using a friend PERIOD. I do beleive he is using you for ***, comfort, company etc., and is buying time until the other girl gets out. And he’s probably using her too!

You see..”hurt people, to hurtful things.” He needs to do some inner healing work, but that’s not your place to help him do it. You see, a person who is well on the inside would never disrespect another human being the way you are being disrespected. I believe you are a beautiful, caring, loving person…put some of that love on yourself! Ask yourself “why do I tolerate such blatant disrespect from this man?” Love your self 1st, talk to somebody, HEAL YOURSELF from the ‘INSIDE OUT’…and once you do..you will ATTRACT the RIGHT kind of man into your life.

I know you can do it!
Peace and Blessing Be Unto you!

Reply June 21, 2014, 6:21 am

Nol

Thanks, for that, Middi… Very well said!!! :)

Reply January 22, 2015, 6:11 pm

Arabia

Asia is right. I ran into one of those a few weeks ago and he almost did my head in. I had to take some pretty hard drugs to get over him, but get over him I did, and fast – in just a few days. The experience has messed me up good though. To do it I had to become a sociopath myself and stop feeling normal human affection. Future guys I meet may suffer due to this as I do not think I am able to feel towards males ever again. Since the “I’m into you oh no I’m not haha” guy? I’ve turned into someone just like him and have this burning desire to go out and start leading men on and teasing them to flip it on them like this guy did, and cause a lot of destruction :)

Reply June 14, 2014, 10:38 pm

Middi

My Dearest Arabia,

Please do not let evil men rob you of love, and a life full of happiness! Yes there are bad men out there..but there are more good men then bad..that’s why this world (as crazy as it has become) is still in one piece. The good WILL ALWAYS outlast the bad.

Please do not bring your self to a low level. You are better than that! Plus, seducing men, and then ‘flippin’ it on the WILL get you killed. Remember you a still a women. Also know that women are emotionally, in intuitively stronger, and smarter then men. Rise above the hate, fear, and anger you have, and shine like the beautiful bright star you are!

As I mentioned in an earlier post : sometimes we “ATTRACT” bad things into our lives, because
we haven’t dealt with certian ‘hurtful’ things in our past. Somethings we may not even be aware of.
So you have to ask yourslef : “Why did I attract this person into my life? What did like about him?
What did he GIVE ME that I felt I needed from him?

Although ‘Sociopaths’ maybe hard to spot, there are always signs like body language & intuition. We tend to IGNORE the RED FLAGS when we really like someone, or are lonenly or have low self-esteem. The simple fact is that you ALLOWED this person into your life..you ATTRACTED that person to you. I’m not blaming you. But the key is to find out why? Then you can do the inner work and heal yourself from the ‘INSIDE OUT” and attract the people that you really need and the ones that will TRULY LOVE you!

Keep your Head up!
Don’t let the wrong doings of others ‘taint’ your beautiful soul!
Peace and Blessings!

Reply June 21, 2014, 6:58 am

useni

i like newmode becouse it talk about the real fact about relationship

Reply May 22, 2014, 1:13 pm

Asia

Sociopaths can do all this and not really like ypu.

Reply November 7, 2013, 7:21 pm

Luke

and shy guys won’t, even when they’re interested, having said that the way shy guys desplay interest makes them seem awkward and creepy, so girls don’t like them.

Reply May 25, 2014, 10:18 pm

Middi

Hello Luke,

I can understand what you mean. But everyone at one point or another has to find the confidence
to over come that ‘shy/awkward’ state. It comes down to REAL ‘Self-Esteem’. Some people get it
at home at an early age, others get it at school, some from Mentors, and the rest through ‘trial and error’. The bottom line is; there are so many ways to get help and information on dating. But it takes time, patience and practice, and some people aren’t even willing to try. Shy people need to be encouraged, and supported by true friends, family, etc. But they have to WANT to CHANGE 1st

Peace and Love To You!

Reply June 21, 2014, 7:06 am

laura

Yes, but they can’t keep that fake mask for long.Eventually, their true ugly face will show.

Reply June 17, 2014, 8:30 am

Middi

Yes Laura, you are so right!

And that’s no matter how much we may like a person, you have to take your time, listen to your ‘inner voice’ (intuition) and acknowledge the RED FLAGS. There are a lot of lonely people out there starved for love and attention..and that could lead them to chose, accept and deal with the wrong people.

Be Brave My Friends…Real Love is just around the corner…but you have to think positive, work on YOURSELF, and be patient in love.

A lot of us claim to want the perfect mate…but are you yourself perfect? Are you what the other person is looking for? The check list that you have for your ideal mate…do YOU have all of those qualities as well?

If so, great…good luck. If not…”how can you ask for something, that your yourself can’t give?”

Peace and Love

Reply June 21, 2014, 7:13 am

Brian

Yes but what you don’t understand is that they don’t care if you find out, by that time they have already notched their headboard and they are done with you anyway.

Reply June 26, 2014, 5:05 pm

middi

My Dearest Brian, all we can do is learn from our mistakes.
The BIGGEST MISTAKE is sleeping with someone too fast. Yes, we all want love, and we all want the feeling that comes from true ‘intimacy”. But like you said; some people will play the game until they get what they want.

Only by WITHHOLDING yourself, and taking the time to truly get to know someone, will you WEED OUT the FAKERS. The 90 Day Rule will weed out the bad seeds, so that the good seed will stick! That means, date without *** for 90 days, and if that person is still around, without pressuring you for ***, then you may be off to a good start towards a healthy, loving Relationship. You see, those that seek ONLY *** or as you said ‘a notch on their headboard’, aren’t brave enough to seek a loving relationship. They aren’t brave enough to face the fact that they want REAL LOVE. They don’t know how to get it or accept it, because they have past issues that they are too scared to deal with. So they go for the ‘easy feel good fix’, then move on to the next one. They are so hurt and angry at themselves, they they don’t believe they NEED LOVE. So they take anything to numb the pain. I don’t want to get into the psychology of it all, but learn from this. You DESERVE LOVE, and we all NEED LOVE. But Love is Sacrificing. And most people have a hard time with this. Think about your best friend, or a close family member. When they **** you off, you work it out right? You all of a sudden become patient and forgiving. It’s not so easy to do with strangers right? Why? Because you took the TIME to get to know your friends and family members.
So take time to get to know the next person you date. And don’t feel bad if you get dumped for not putting out early on. That only means that you just saved yourself from getting hurt/played, and you are also saving yourself for the one that will LOVE you for LIFE!
Have PATIENCE my friend.
Love is on the way!
Peace and Blessings

Reply June 27, 2014, 11:43 pm

Brian

I agree, and you just gave them the recipe. But it doesn’t take a Sociopaths to simply be a hound dog, in fact I think most men for at least some period in their life play the field, and probably try to present any face you want to see in order to take you to bed.

Reply June 26, 2014, 5:24 pm

middi

The 90 DAY RULE will ‘Un-mask’ the bad ones.
Plus lots of talking, asking questions, getting to know the other person and KEY:
get to know their friends, family, co-workers. Reading body language is KEY.
Looking in the EYES, etc.

You see, people with ‘something to HIDE’, will avoid personal questions, won’t talk about family, won’t introduce you to friends, won’t talk about their jobs, etc. Even if they make all of this up and seem believable, if keep pressing, the lies will slip them up and the true will be revealed.

THE SIGNS ARE THERE! And even if I’m giving you some sage advice, or ‘play by play’ info for bad folks to use..it still won’t matter, because evil never hides for very long. They only get away with it because you THINK you’re in love, you IGNORE the RED FLAGS. Introduce them to your friends and family, and they will spot the fakers too! See, when people THINK they are in love, they just want to be with only that person, all the time. You need your friend and family to be the OBJECTIVE view; to see and pick up on the things that you’re to BLIND to see when your THINK your in love.

Common sense is greatly lacking on the world today, but never fear, as long as your are breathing, you can learn and grow.

To your Happiness
Peace

Reply June 28, 2014, 12:00 am

Brian

middi I could not agree with you more on the 90 day rule. If you don’t want to be used you need to know how young men think. I have tried to tell my daughter this but young girls seem to think they know better than an old man :). Or maybe she listened but just didn’t let me know she did.

Reply July 1, 2014, 12:45 pm

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