Ask a Guy: Does He Like Me? post image

Ask a Guy: Does He Like Me?


There is this guy who I see often but have never actually spoken to. The only contact has really been him indirectly talking to me. One time he told someone that I was a “good kid”, when I was standing right next to him.

He also stares at me sometimes and then doesn’t look away when I catch his glace. There are other things along those lines as well.

Does he like me or am I overreacting?

To answer your question from the information you’ve given me… I honestly can’t say.

From what you told me, my read on what you’re trying to figure out is one of three scenarios:

a) you want to know that he likes you because knowing someone likes you feels good,
b) he is indifferent to you (in the romantic sense), but you want him to like you and you’re seeing what you want to see,
c) you don’t know whether or not he likes you, but you’d be open to starting something with him.

I’m going to go with the assumption that you like him, mainly because if you didn’t, you wouldn’t have asked.

So let’s assume that I’m right and you like him and you’d like it if he wants you back. I would even bet that you’re probably hoping I write back that he does like you.

But deeper than that, what you’re hoping is for me to confirm that I see things the way you want them to be – “he loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, etc.”

You ever play those games? Look at horoscopes? Look for “signs” that it’s meant to be?

At the heart of all of these games and guesses is doubt. It’s a sense that you don’t really believe that it could be true, but you really want it to be.

A lot of the time, women fall into the trap of playing “emotional detective”: They dig into their memories and observations and go through EVERY insignificant detail to try and uncover some “hidden message” or “secret code” that the guy is sending.

The reality is that playing emotional detective usually only succeeds at doing one thing:  Making the girl go absolutely crazy.

My suggestion is rather than trying to “solve the mystery”, assume that things are the way you want them to be. At the heart of it, that’s what confidence is…

Worrying what the other person thinks usually just creeps them out… but assuming that they like you in the way that you want them to… well, that usually leads to them actually liking you! But you have to get good at believing in yourself and assuming that what you want to be true, is true.

I’m not saying to delude yourself or to totally ignore reality. But if you don’t know one way or the other what he thinks of you, assuming that he likes you will automatically cause you to act in a way that’s more… “likable” and attractive.

And as a result, there’s a really good chance that he’ll end up liking you back (in the end) if you assume that he does like you. In psychology, they call this a “self-fulfilling prophecy”.

Put your focus on really liking yourself and believing that the types of guys you like also like you… The more you like yourself and believe that you can have what you want, the more likely you actually will.

Now, in the remaining part of the article, I’m going to talk about ways that you can tell if he likes you. If you’re going to read it, keep in mind that how you think and your mindset is way more important than what you do.

So make sure you let the first part of what I said sink in.

OK, so what are some signs you can tell if he likes you? If he does several of these things, he likes you. Here’s a checklist off the top of my head:

  • Does he start conversations with you?
  • Does he ask you things that he doesn’t necessarily need to ask you? Questions he could ask anyone…
  • Does he look at you/check you out? (Sounds like yes, in your case.)
  • Does he tease you? (Most teasing is flirting… and I would encourage you to interpret teasing that way regardless… It’s not every guy’s style though… only some guys.)
  • Have you ever heard of him asking anyone else about you or bringing you up to someone else?
  • Does he act differently when he knows you’re around than when he’s just naturally going about his business (when he doesn’t know you’re around)?

.

That’s a pretty good list of things that can let you know if he’s into you. Some guys play it cool and don’t overtly show a lot of signs, so if you don’t notice these things it doesn’t necessarily mean he doesn’t like you.

Now, what can you do to up your chances of him “making a move” with you? For starters:

  • Smile. Smiling is sexy and inviting, it is super attractive to guys. I think it is really sad these days that magazines, movies and the modeling industry push the idea that looking pissed off is sexy. It’s not, it REPELS guys in real life. Don’t try to look like some model who’s all cold and couture – it sends the message to guys to stay away. NOT sexy, not attractive, DON’T DO IT. If you don’t believe me, go on hotornot.com or facethejury.com and post two pictures of yourself – one with a straight or “model” straight-face look and one with a nice smile. I guarantee that the smile picture will score much higher.
  • Look your best. Guys respond to it, that’s a no brainer. It’s not to say that guys only care about looks, but it is important. Working out will give you a positive glow, inside and out, so definitely work that into your life. You will look and feel better – both are important. If you’re on our site, looking your best will not be a problem. :)
  • Tease him a bit in a fun way IF you can make it work with your own personal style. Again, teasing is not for everyone, but if you can incorporate it into your style while still having the vibe that you are a nice girl, you can usually stir a guy up in a good way. Guys like a little challenge to wake them up – just don’t go overboard. What’s good teasing look like? In a nutshell, it’s pushing on areas where you know he’s strong or takes pride. If he’s good at something, you can tease him in a fun way about it. If he’s bad at something, DON’T tease him about it. Simple enough.
  • Balance your pushes and pulls. OK, I say this next part with caution – do not abuse this. There is a truth about people (men and women) that we value what we have to work for. In the beginning stages of dating or attracting a man or woman, it can help spark chemistry if you mix signs of interest with signs of not being interested. People refer to it as sending mixed signals or playing hard to get. What’s a good… (continued on next page)

… (continued – Click to keep reading Ask a Guy: Does He Like Me?)

Written by Eric Charles

I'm Eric Charles, the co-founder and co-editor of A New Mode. I love writing articles to help people free themselves from suffering and have clarity in their love life. I have a degree in Psychology and I've dedicated the last 20 years of my life to learning everything I can about human psychology and sharing what gets people out of struggling with life and into having the life they really want. If you want to contact me, feel free to reach out on Facebook or Twitter.

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Ms Summer

Hello there’s this guy at my work place who I seem to hit it off with …but we frequently talk online but I try not to make things awkward at work. And I avoid him ,I also become shy and quiet when he’s around me what should I do? His chats with me basically borders on sexual stuff but he has asked me out online but never face to face ,he doesn’t call except the two times he video called me and suddenly we stopped talking for like 4 days now and no word from him ..
I’m confused and I want to know if I should say yes to his request for us to be together or should I just send him a text instead .. I’m afraid of being too needy or desperate
Fyi we just met recently like 3 months

Reply September 4, 2022, 9:18 am

Eric Charles

OK. Let’s talk about this.

Right now, you’re afraid to make the wrong decision because you don’t want to appear needy or desperate. There’s other things, too, but let’s tackle this first.

You don’t have to worry about “appearing” needy or desperate… you only need to concern yourself with actually being needy or desperate!

In other words… if you are, you’re not going to be able to hide it. And if you aren’t, you don’t have to worry about it. Am I making sense so far?

So then the question becomes: In essence, what is it to be needy or desperate?

It comes down to you trying to force a situation.

Look, a situation is what it actually is.

He’s either interested or not. He’s either open to something or not.

In other words, this is not about impressing him but rather just discovering what’s actually there.

When you look at all of this as a process of discovery, it can become fun and natural again.

If you look at it like you need to impress him or make him interested, then it puts a ton of pressure on you.

And you know how a person acts when they’re under a ton of pressure to make another person respond to them a certain way?

Needy. Desperate.

They “need” the other person to respond in a certain way or it will “mean” something bad about them personally.

In other words, a person who’s being desperate and needy is someone who’s taking everything happening as personal and meaning something personal about them.

So what do you do instead?

Treat it as discovery. You are just exploring what’s there. You’re just playfully discovering, you’re not trying to make something happen or make them interested or make them see you a certain way.

OK? Very important.

The people who are “your people” will love you. And the people who aren’t? There is nothing that will win them over. If you try, you’ll either get a humiliating rejection or worse, if they’re a very not-nice person, they’ll toy with you, use you and then reject you!

So… you don’t have to worry about any of that if your attitude is that you DISCOVER people, not IMPRESS people. OK?

Now it sounds to me like there might be something here if you’ve been chatting outside work and even video called sometimes.

If there’s anything possible, best thing is to get offline and into something in real life but outside of work.

Now, as a quick disclaimer, this is not me advising you to do this. Whatever you decide to do is your choice entirely. I’m just mentally walking through what my thought process is, do with it as you please.

I would want to meet somewhere light and easy, something chill where there’s no pressure. You can kind of talk about things you’re doing, places you’ll be… examples of this would be like you’re going to buy something but going to hang out at the coffee shop for an hour… or you want to go to some place but have no one to go with. That sort of thing is enough of a green light to an interesting guy to say he’d be up for it.

Don’t overdo it, again trying to force something is coming from that place of it meaning too much to you personally, when you really want to just discover what’s already there.

On that quick note, I’ll mention that if you’re going to have something with someone, you want there to be as much interest on his side as one yours, right? So a mistake desperate people make is that when they sense a person isn’t as interested, they try to “bridge the gap” and pour in more effort and interest on their side to make it easier for the other person to say yes. Bad choice!

OK. Those are some quick ideas there. If you have more questions, let me know.

Reply September 4, 2022, 10:30 am

Jamie

There’s this guy that went to the same primary school as me and now goes to my high school. We used to actually be friends when we were younger but at this moment I basically hate him- and I’m pretty sure he hates me too. I always catch him looking at me and when he talks to me it doesn’t seem like he hates me, in fact it seems like he enjoys talking to me a lot, and when he sits near me he will go out of his way to talk to me. He’s said some things – “she’s a dick because she has one” (not true btw) and “the happiest moment of my life was when I hit her in the face with a ball”. So it’s fair to say that I’m pretty mad at him. I don’t have his contacts bc I blocked him and even though he said he hates me, he only said that after I blocked him. I think it’s my fault he doesn’t like me anymore- that it’s because I started to hate him that he hates me now. But idk if he hates me, I mean all the things point towards him hating me right? But he was joking and acts friendly, flirts and always looks at me. I don’t know, someone please help. Tell me that he doesn’t have any feeling for me so I can stop feeling guilty

Reply June 16, 2022, 6:54 am

Prapti

Hello! So i had a relationship of 3 yrs , and tbis yr we broke up due to several reasons. Now , after breakup we talk but i dnt know sometimes he says that he still likes me . Now after our break up when we takes wid me abt his girl -frnds i dnt y but i get jealous. I dnt know what to do. I dnt know how to moe on from this current situ. I really need help

Reply November 16, 2019, 2:02 pm

Becks

I’ve had the biggest crush on this guy but I’m not sure he likes me. We’re colleagues and his office is just next to mine. He teases me a lot but he teases other people as well. He tests me often, not daily though, but I’ve seen him texts another woman at work every day. On the other hand, he gives me high fives, he pulls my hair sometimes and I’ve never seen him touch anyone else. But it could be because I’m one of the youngest in the company and maybe he sees me as a kid? He has made jokes like “if only people hear you bit me” (which never happened) or other jokes that make it sound like we’ve been… more intimate with each other. Is he just a flirt, is he playing me, is he interested or does he not care? Cause considering my feelings for him, I cannot trust my own head right now

Reply September 14, 2019, 2:59 pm

Confused Rose

Eric,
There’s this guy…he showed signs of a person who’s interested on someone. He always looked at me when we were talking, initiates talking, ask questions about something i’d mention before or something about my family, ask my opinion about things even in ordering food, always lean closer to me when we were talking and ask me to repeat things while looking straight into my eyes, looks away when he thinks I’ll look in his way, sometimes he’s too close to me which he never did before and I was really afraid because I am not used to this. So I tend to flinch or stay away from him…I don’t look his way and pretends I don’t care nor interested in what he’s doing. And now he seems to be pulling back. And there’s more, I was thinking he’s gay when I first saw him that’s why I told myself that maybe he’s just like that to everyone or maybe I am misreading him and just assuming that he likes me. He’s already 40 something and still not married. What do you think about it? Is he really into me or is it just I am misreading him?

Reply May 9, 2019, 2:01 am

girl in love

does he like me IF……

Well……

At lunch he will look at me and full on smile.

the one time I was going to walk by him and like a couple feet before I got close to him he scooted in his chair so I could get by.

He stares alot…. :)

He always looks at me when I come in the room….

He started the conversation at least 2 times

And like more then that based off of this information, do you think he likes me?

Reply April 9, 2019, 3:28 pm

Marissa Rothwell

Hi,
There is this guy at my school, we have been friends since September 2018. I’ve known him for 5 years, but I haven’t really talked to him before now. A few days after we became friends he started this game of tag that we still play now. Our group of friends always goes outside. Last week it was really cold and I complained-ish about it, so he went to his locker and grabbed his jacket and we headed outside. Just before we got outside he offered me his jacket, but I said no… I think that might have set him back a bit. Today he kept trying to touch my knee with his own. (kinda enjoyed ;) ) He has been doing this for a while now though.

There is also this guy on my hockey team and he is in the grade above me at my school. when we pass each other in the hallway he looks at me and when I catch him, he looks away. At our last game he kept trying to talk to me and he usually doesn’t really talk to me. Then he kept looking at me on the bench.

Im confused with both boys as I haven’t had much luck in relationships. HELP!

Reply February 8, 2019, 11:23 pm

Ariana

Eric hi, it would be great if you could explain in more detail the balancing of pushes and pulls (provide examples etc). I am sure I am doing it all wrong.. please..:) xx

Reply July 27, 2017, 4:24 am

Jody

I’ve known this guy for 8 years of my life. We met when I was only 15 and he was 17. Over the passed 8 years we have both been in relationships- long ones and short ones. But, despite having dated other people, he has still made sure to remain in contact with me respectfully of course over these 8 years. Now we are both single for the first time in 5 years, and he says he’d like to go out with me on a date because he’s always wanted to. I’m not really sure what to make of this guy since he has listened to me so many times about my relationship problems but has still continued to want to talk to me. Any clue on what this means and what should I do?

Reply July 12, 2017, 1:15 am

Nicole

I need help please, I’ve known this guys for 7 years he knows everything about me and I know everything about him. But here this past few months he’s been acting different. He’s getting more touchy, he’s tickling me more than normal, always finds a reason to touch me or much hands, I’ve caught him staring at my face and I’ve also caught him staring at my body. And now he’s starting to holler more at me to get my attention when I walk by. He even start closer to me, so there isn’t literally no space between us. I don’t know what to do or if he’s flirting and trying to tell me and I’m just not realizing it…Can you please help me??

Reply May 29, 2017, 1:21 am

Philosophy

I need some help pls. There is a guy that I catches staring at me. Sometimes, he gets closer to me. He makes an eye contact to me but I am the one who break it. Then sometimes I can see him grinning while looking at mebut he never admitted that he likes me and i never admitted that I like him too. Does he likes me??
But there’s a rumor that he has a girlfriend that’s why I’m confused right now. What should I do? Should I stop liking him or not??

Reply March 8, 2017, 4:38 am

Bella

He showed me almost half signs he likes me but he never talked to me or made a move!! Is it because he likes me or is it because he hates me !! What should i do??? Please tell me its urgent or else i would be late i never showed him a sign that i like him !! Tell me please

Reply February 6, 2017, 9:49 am

Bella

CAN ANYONE PLEASE TELL ME IF THE GUY LIKES ME OR NOT IN THE COMMENTS HERE PLEASE!!
TELL ME AM I TOO LATE OR I CAN MANAGE EVERYTHING EVEN NOW(IF THERE IS)!!

He looks at me a lot
His friends look at me with a grin
He smiles at me whenever i am around and tries to hold my gaze but i often neither smile and even break the eye contact 1st
He once got red when i entered the class and stopped talking to his friends
He once was looking over and over again at the door with a tensed face and when i entered the class he looked relaxed
He once laughed very loudly on one of my most silly jokes and even he tried a lot to make me laugh
Etc etc
BUT HE HAD NEVER TALKED TO ME OR MADE A MOVE
Does he hate me or does he like me comment please please

Reply February 6, 2017, 9:41 am

grace

i think he likes you. but i think he is just shy

Reply February 10, 2017, 7:06 pm

Isamarie

Should i ask a mutual friend of me and my crush to ask him if he knows me or anything about me(indirectly if he notices me that well)??Would he tell her if he knows anything about me or likes me!!???

Reply February 6, 2017, 9:28 am

Zoe-Lucy

Theres this boy and hes a year younger than me, i’ve known him for about 2 years now we go to the same school. He got out of a relationship about a month ago and his ex is now one of my good friends. But, the thing is i think he likes me. He always gives me hugs and touches me also he gave me a shoulder massage and massaged down my back too. We always flirt and when he is saying goodbye he gives me a hug and buries his nose in my neck. I dont know if he likes me or what but im sortof mixed weather i like him or not too.

Reply February 3, 2017, 4:38 pm

Moe

I met this guy abt two years ago on the internet,for months he wanted me to go out on a date with him but I usually turn him down cos I was seeing someone .A year ago my bf travelled and told me he won’t be coming back to the country so I decided to meet this mysterious guy,it wasn’t really a date,it was more like an event he invited me for which he was quite busy on that day ,we didn’t even talk much.Few months later we met and we had sex,the sex was great tho but I didn’t want it to get too far.we continue seeing each other and having sex,I started to notice he calls me once in a while and he is always like I don’t call ,why? Was already calling me his gf,I was shocked and had to ask him if we were dating and then he told me he really really likes me he even said he loves me like I thought we were just having fun,he was hurt wen I said that.So right now av decided to give him a try cos I really like him too but I don’t want to rush things but the way he looks at me wen I close my eyes or wen I look away gives me butterflies.Am I wrong for dating this guy ? I really do like him now tho but don’t want to rush things

Reply January 25, 2017, 7:06 pm

Candy Allen

OK I need advice. I have this crush and I don’t know if he likes me but I was getting information through my friend who was also my crushes best friend (kind of obsessive I know but I’ve been friend zoned for three years) but my friend recently confessed his feelings for me I love him but I love him as a friend and I don’t know what to do because I can’t ask him to play detective because that is a really horrible thing to do to him and I don’t know what to do. Help!

Reply December 24, 2016, 11:28 pm

Kessian

Mines is very complicated,i am dating this guy,he has a girlfriend,i know it’s wrong but I didn’t know he was with her in the first place,so I ask him,if he loves his girlfriend so much ,why is he cheating and he keeps me enemy for askingthat,so I assume he probably do love her,w what do you think,he loves her

Reply August 18, 2016, 5:17 pm

Emanuella

Hi Eric,
I’m from the Netherlands and 1 year ago I met my current boyfriend from America. But this summer vacation I met someone (also from the Netherlands, we met in France at a camping area) and we had a click. I liked him so much and he me too. But today my boyfriend asked to me if I wanted to be his girlfriend and I said yes because I liked him 6 months ago and thought the feelings were still there. But I’m hesitating..because my thoughts are still with the guy from vacation. And idk what to do..Help me please..

Reply August 17, 2016, 1:26 pm

Charis

Hi, I have to ask questions about my relationship, my boyfriend know I love him with all my heart, I don’t feel like he feels the same, but it was he who said we are in a relationship. And he has always kissed me whenever we saw each other.a few months ago I sent him a message, but to my surprise he called me he don’t call everyday but when he does its good.hes a musician and he also take care of his dad . now back to he and I he says um his baby but I can’t read him , but I really hope he loves me to. We’ve kissed alot but never had sex he’s 50 and I’m 43. I love him so much.so tell me what you think.

Chrissy

Reply July 24, 2016, 7:20 pm

Cecilia

hi Eric
well I have this friend he’s just like my best friend we’ve been friends for 13 years now well we were separated for 4 years but found each other again it so happened that I had a boyfriend by then and he had a girlfriend(we were in love for years but none had the courage to tell the other) it so happened that my boyfriend got me pregnant then left me after learning that my best friend apparently saw me through it all now she’s 6 months,however my best friend says he’s not in love with me but he gives mixed reactions he cares for me so much he says he can’t stand losing me, he is always missing me and likes teasing me a lot,he plays father figure to my daughter and always trying to attend my important occasions he broke up with his girlfriend is he really in love with me?

Reply July 3, 2016, 1:03 pm

Excel

I don’t know???

Reply July 7, 2016, 12:30 am

Kaleah

Was married 17 years and finally am delegated and now divorcing. one guy has listened to me complain and has given me advice about things for five years! Good advice; not selfish (although the he seems to have gotten frustrated when I mentioned a guy who recently called). Our kids were best friends and we agreed never to be alone together while I was married out of respect that our kids were friends. After moving 1500 miles away I sense something stronger than ever before. He asked for my address to send a book he bought me. I have no idea what it is. Every time we were ever around each other inambunconfortable, gritty, I feel tension….and like he would never want me. He doesn’t purposely do anything to make me think that other than we agreed years ago that due to my being married and kids that were friends we would never spend time in discussions alone. Well now his kids are moved away (16 and 17) and no longer spend time with mine; I notice things he says or emails that seem like a puzzle. He has always listened intently and only once did I see him with a girl at his house and he didn’t even introduce us! It seems our life plans are similar and heading the same way. I have felt giddy and excited and like I was in love before…but this has hit me like a ton of bricks. I told him in an email that I had something to tell him but I wasn’t good on the phone (fear of rejection). I’m very confused and feel this is make it or break it time. Any thoughts as to if I’m sensing / reading this correctly?

Reply May 26, 2016, 5:02 am

Alexis McEveritt

I got drunk at a party and sent a guy nudes when I got home. He is popularish and I was confused at first as to why he was asking me but he did. I sent him pictures and the next day he told me we should hook up and continue our “relationship.” I thought this was very funny considering he acted like I didn’t exist in public. I told my best friends and they laughed with me but then told other people. Today he texted me and said, “you need to stop telling people you sent me nudes.” I responded with the very appropriate wtf and went on with my business. He texted later saying people were asking him about it and he needed me to stop because he doesn’t want that kind of reputation. Does he mean I have a reputation and by associating with him I kind of transferred it or does he mean the reputation of someone who receives and sends nudes? Which he already has.

Reply May 23, 2016, 11:33 pm

anna

hey Eric
from last august i am in love with boy
he works at the grocery store but i think he is between 18-20 and i am 17.
when i first met him i wasn’t attracted to him , in my view he was just a vendor, but he smiled at me and try to joke with me ,and that repeated at the second time , then i fall in love with him,i started to go there a lot more than usual, and one day a boy was trying to be close to me i asked him to be away but he pretend as if he wasn’t hear me , then the boy i love asked him to be away from me ,that’s make me love him more ,and he always smiles at me when he see me and sometimes i smile too and sometimes i try not to smile but the smile appear in my eye , when i see him my heart beat fast,he flirt me 4 times till nw ,even though i will buy only a chocolate , i saw him in my dreams a lot ,one day he saw my drawing and he like it ,i was so happy , and when he he heard me talking to mom on phone about the final exams,he asked me which school year i am in, and i told him , but i was shy to ask him the same question . and he wished me the best at the exams and asked me about the last day of exams , but at the last day of exams he didn’t asked me about he didn’t talk to me about the exam , but he smiles at me and joke with me too , my sis and friend tell me that he loves me and that he afraid to tell me but he do this things to show me that he love me , sometimes i agree with them , but i am confused , I am afraid that he may do the same thing with any one ,
please tell me if he love me or not and what i can do.

Reply May 22, 2016, 10:03 pm

Kylie

Hi Eric,

I am so confused and would love your advice.

I met a guy through online dating He put an amazing first date together with a few things I mentioned I liked doing, we ended up the day / night with beers and lots of kissing and said we’d catch up again. Since then, we have hung out and been a few more great dates all in which he has put together. He has had some emotional things happen to him with a person close to him getting really sick and he come to me for support and we spoke about everything. Everything when I am with him is AMAZING!! Thing is, our dates / catch ups are very spread out (maybe once a week), we have been seeing each other for just under 3 months. I know he’s still online dating as he’s matched with a friend of a friend and following her on social media and has continued to do that with other girls… Am I going crazy, do guys still do that when they supposedly really, really like someone (as he’s told me so many times)… Should I continue dating? He seems like a genuine and nice guy but from my history I keep second guessing him. I am so insecure at the moment I can feel myself about to sabotage everything as I don’t know where I stand and feel it’s too early to ask>?!?

Reply April 14, 2016, 9:57 pm

latoya

hey ,I met a guy and we have been talking for the past four months .I first send him an message not expecting any responds from him. But nine months later in November I got an email from him.we kept in contact with each other ,however ,I started having feelings for him.i was not expecting to meet the type of guy I am looking for .unfortunately I told him how I felt and he told me I am too young for him .love has no age .we kept in contact with each other .surprisingly he opened up to me telling me everything about himself and his family etc .he started telling me personal information about his self esteem etc. one day we were talking and he described the type of woman he is looking for and he found that I have some of the qualities he is looking for .but he keeps on saying I am too young I got lots of time.i realize he wants to tell me how he feels about me or am I jus imagining things?he has kept on telling me I am really kind and he likes talking to me .we have some of the same qualities but I know we will not be able to be together .I recently talked to him and I told him I love him and after I send the message I realize what I said and he just snicker.can I get your views.

Reply April 7, 2016, 11:21 pm

Megan

I’ve been talking to the guy I like for almost two weeks now. I do find him attractive, but his personality and just how he is is what draws me in. I first gave him my number almost a month ago, but never received a text. Rather than leaving it alone, I asked him to go to the Military Ball with me, to which he replied that he would. However, he hasn’t been replying as frequently as he would before (within five minutes).
Our conversations aren’t very awkward, rather, we talk about a lot of things like favorite stuff or ambitions or what we’d like to do in life and generally, we agree with each other’s views and add on our own opinions. With this, he has asked about things such as “how far have you gone with someone”, “what’s your opinion on love” or things that seem to be related to relationships, how I am, and/or how I feel. Both of us are shy and introverted with anxiety, so, in order to take stress off him, I usually text first.
He does show signs of interest such as body language (he’ll copy mine at times and also I’ve caught him staring, too). On the other hand, he said that he finds relationships to not be as worth it at an earlier age (both of us just turned 18). So…why are there so many mixed signals?

Reply March 1, 2016, 10:13 pm

Red

I’ve known this guy(A) for almost 11 years he has acted like everything to me, friend, boyfriend, big brother etc. He asked me out before we became friends, i was underage he wasnt, he quit his job and we went our separate ways. A year later i was dating this other guy(B) and he happened to be friends with (A). upon seeing eachother again (A) and i hugged and naturally asked how the other was doing. (B) and i split up and are on good terms (A) (B) and i would hang out from time to time. Anyway while i was dating (B), (A) was always around for me to talk to and we got really close. (A) acts as if he’s my boyfriend when we go out as a group, i tend to stray off on my own and he stays with me, he is comfortable just laying around talking to me, has to hug me before he leaves all the time, drives down to my place in the middle of the night, has text me until one of us is almost asleost always says night last, always been there for me, has held me while i’ve cryed myself to sleep and not moved, stop by randomly without warning (not in a creepy way just a hey was down this way or i forgot to give this back to you last time i came down and since i was in the neighborhood), the list could go on.
Anyway a few years ago i said something about how i wished we had went out (which i do) and how us going out probably would have saved me from the bad relationships i had after. He told me he was glad we never did he was a jerk and we probably wouldnt be the friends we are now. We have only had one misunderstanding where we stopped talking, for 6 months, and when he asked me why i hadnt talked to him i told him i thought he hated me. He told me no he couldnt hate me. The rest of the time we joke around, have debates with eachother, challenge eachother, tease, and just be ourselves. (B) that we hadnt seen in years, was out with us, about 4 months ago and asked about (A) and my relationship, i just looked at him as if he grew a horn and asked what he meant. His response was ‘baby girl i think he’s in love with you.’ I asked what would make him say that and his response ‘ you know he hasn’t dated anyone since you came back around, and i could tell when we were together that there was something there, he watches you out of the cornor of his eye all the time, you move he moves, you get mad and he follows you to calm you down, and the way that he’s always hugged you, its not a normal your one of the guys hug, he pulls you in, holds you for a few extra seconds like he’s scarred to let go and there is that awkward silence that follows after he hugs you. Not to mention he closes his eyes.’ I thought (B) was crazy at the time, now i’m not sure.
When i was talking to (A) earlier i made a joke about how we wouldnt get along so well if we werent so difficult with eachother, he laughed and said difficult, you’ve had me confused since the day i meant you.
Now for the questions
Does it sound like there is a thing there, or is he just being a good friend?
Should we try if there is? I really dont want to lose him and he’s told me that he doesn’t want to lose me
And what does he mean? How could i have had him confused since the day i meant him?
Thanks in advance for any help.
Red

Reply February 21, 2016, 5:12 am

I.T

Hey I am in desperate help of your Eric!

There is this guy I really really like. We met in holiday vacations for the first time. He was kinda my best frnds ex boyfrnd! But they are still frnds as they have a whole group of old frnds from uni. So they as far as I know are jst good frnds now.. So during vacations we started liking each other.. And he told me that how amazing he thinks I am and how much he want to be with someone like me. I kept putting him off and then finally the whole flirting and all turned into hooking up.. Things were going smooth until my best frnd showed that she wasn’t in support of this! And asked the guy to shop with the whole thing.. This guy let’s call him ” RS ” is still a really good frnd to her ex! So he wanted me to be more private and not show our affection infront of her.. I was ok wasn’t happy but was like ok.. Then After the holidays were over he called me the next day saying it can’t work out and by doing this we are hurting a lot of people.. And that he thinks we should jst be frnds. I was taken by suprise as I was the one who didn’t want to break the girl code and be with my best frnds ex and now after everything he doesn’t want all this, and wants to be jst frnds. But well I tried to take everything in a cool manner I didn’t show anything to him and told him that it was ok and maybe it’s best for both of us! Thought it hurt me inside real bad. Couple of days passed he called me up being all nice and sweet again telling me how much he was missing me. So ransom txt and calls started .. He would call me once a day or drop in a couple of txt every day.. And then one day he came to meet me ( forgot to mention we live in different countries but only 1hr far by plane) all the way from his country saying that he wants to spend time with me and he wants to tell me something. I thought Maybe this was it.. We met spend the whole day together had an amazing time . He told me that he doesn’t want her ex to find out that he was here to see me so I keep it to myself as well.. Which was very hurtful for me.. I mean she is his ex! And he cares more about her me? But then he told me that he jst doesn’t wanna hurt anyone one so I Jst closed my eyes and said ok.. he kept on praising me the whole day and evening! Telling me how special I was and that how amazing he thinks we are together.. That night we stayed together at my place.. Everything was going well until the time came to take off his pants! He freaked out.. and got all cold feet . And started telling that he isn’t looking for anything serious and that he is not in his life phase in which he wants to commit with anyone but what we had was amazing! ( random hookup ) I don’t want that! I want him to commit to me! Be only mine! He started off that he want to do it with me someone who he thinks he can have a long relationship with (which is weird! Guys don’t think like that) and then him not doing it made me feel like there was something wrong with me! But all night long he kept on telling me while we did other things that how hot I was! And how he couldn’t have enough of me! And that he loved me And how hard it was for him to control! I tried so hard so hard to turn him on enough that he could not control! But he jst didn’t give in! Coz he thinks things become more serious if u have sex! Well I didn’t push him more . the next day he left.. We have been talking more on call and txt.. He has been more caring towards me.. But he doesn’t say I love u or anything! And today he told me that he wants to come over again but this time for a week.. And want to spend more time with me.. I am scared! I am falling for this guy! And I don’t know if he will commit to me or not! And I don’t know how to make him commit to me! Should I ignore him and show him that I am a high value women he can’t jst get me easily he needs to commit to me to get me. Or should I keep loving and taking care of him until he feels the same way for me.. Is he still in love with her ex? I really like him.. I don’t know what to do.. ????

Reply January 23, 2016, 9:51 pm

I.T

?

Reply January 23, 2016, 9:49 pm

Levi

Emma marketing are the ones helping me with my twitter management, I really don’t have time between school and designs to take care of social media for hours everyday. very helpful ! (emma-marketing.com for the curious)

twitter

Reply January 18, 2016, 10:08 am

LyNea

Hi
I’m not a dating kind of person. But I deceded to change that after 61/2 yrs of celibacy. So I get on a generous man site. I shoot many down (but not in a mean way). Suddenly a handsome rich man shows interest. We exchange messages until with satisfactory he ask for my number. We text back and forth. He’s direct but not talkative. I have to make most of the conversation. I’m thinking, I see why he text. He is happy with our talk. He continues to text asking for different favors. I’m not a game player so if I’m interested I oblige. At a point I send a less attention getter video of who I am. Immediately after watching he says he wanted something more explicit. I oblige. He has already asked and received his other similar request and was happy.
He is aware that I am unskilled and acknowledge my inexperience and reluctance in doing certain favors but he continues to ask for favors. After last request which I was a bit uncomfortable with (and it may have shown) I send and he just stops all contact completely. Wow. What did I do?
He was so into me. Really. Now he cut me off completely.
And he will not tell me why. I’m so hurt and ashamed.
I know I’m extremely hard to get when men come on to me. But when the one I want comes I may try too hard to please him. But my thing is I don’t like game. I don’t do game. Game never really works in the end. So when its there I don’t come with play hard to get games or pretend to be uninterested or don’t answer when he calls or don’t show your true feelings yet or make him wait on purpose or all the foolishness. That’s not mature or real to me. Its game. Playing with folk minds. Silly.
Either we both will be real with our likes or forget it. Playtime is over. Let’s do this in real life. All games aside.

Reply January 11, 2016, 1:26 pm

LyNea

Also after sendings he made a day for us to meet.

Reply January 11, 2016, 1:30 pm

Kirsten

There’s this boy in my school and before we met he commented on some of my pictures then the next day in school he was asking people who I was and he was looking for me then we being hugging everyday and he’s kissed my cheek a couple times he always walks me to class and tells people we go out we don’t go out but he always says we do he says he wasn’t a to marry me and that that he loves me and he always calls me his girlfriend … Does this mean he likes me ??

Reply January 10, 2016, 7:28 am

Kirsten

He wants to marry me *

Reply January 10, 2016, 7:31 am

help me pls

ok so I was wondering if u can help me w/ a guy????? there is a guy I just meet him about two months ago and he his showing me mixed looks + he likes to stare at me and its akward because I don’t like him and how do I know he likes me and how do I tell him I don’t like him with out him laughing at me if he doesn’t like me pls help me I’m so confused !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Reply January 8, 2016, 6:45 pm

bailey

so there is a guy I liked and he use to like me then said he liked me as a friend. and before he told me things he would use to rub my lower back and touch my thigh and hold it. Now he is giving me mixed feeling and mixed looks. and he still looks at me still. and then when he saw me he told one of his friends that he as a girlfriend
can u tell me
1)If he actually liked me when he said so.
2) still likes me
3) is he trying to make me jealous.
sincerely,
confused girl

Reply January 8, 2016, 6:35 pm

Kirsten

He clearly likes you !!!

Reply January 10, 2016, 7:30 am

Halima

i have a best friend,lets name him A. A and i are very close best friends. People used to say that we love each other and we are hiding it but there was nothing like that. We were sincerely best friends, at that time we both were not dating anyone, we were both singles but never thought of dating each other.No one believed that we were dating till A got a girlfriend,i was happy for him but the worst part was that his gf disliked me.Because she thought i can take A from her anytime so,she started the mission of separating us.First she started telling him that she wanted to be both his best friend and his girlfriend which means that i should backoff then. He was confused,he didn’t know what to do,then he came to me and told me everything, i saw that pain in his eyes,the pain of not wanting to lose neither me nor his gf but has no other option but to choose one. But then i gave in and gave her the title “best friend”.That’s what he used to tell me, “just give her that title,and i promise that that won’t change anything between us,we were,we are and will always be best friends”.

Even after giving her that title,she didn’t rest.She then started telling him to block all the girls that she knows and also know him,so, am included,she didn’t had the guts to tell him directly to block me so she used the word “all the girls”.One day i went to visit him,on our way to back,he told me what she asked this time,i never wanted to make things hard for him,so i told him that am ok with it,he can block me as long as that won’t affect our friendship.I could do anything to save our friendship and to make things easy for him.But he couldn’t live without talking to each other,so he unblocked me but he used to delete our chats and block me again whenever she is visiting him or they are meeting up.This girlfriend of his wasn’t stupid, she came to know that we used to tall to each other,then she came with the idea of hacking his phone, which was a lie.She told him that she hacked his phone so she can see whom he is chatting with and whom he is talking to.As always he told me everything when we meet up and as always i made his work easier by coming with the idea of writing letters to each other. We then used to write letters to each other,we used to write the letters at night then he gives the letter to his sister when she is leaving the house and i used to exchange the letter with his sister when she brings his letter.His sister was our Postman. things went on like that till one day she told hom that she didn’t hack his phone.He could get angry but he was happy thinking that we can now communicate through phone and no more troubling his sister.Things went on like that,playing hide and seek with his girlfriend. It was stress but also fun,we learnt a lot and our friendship became stronger and stronger as things get harder and harder.

Now his girlfriend thinks that we don’t talk to each other and also hate each other.That is what we made her think and now she is less interested in him because she was dating him because he was “the cool guy” and she was competing with me,it was really an unhealthy competition, isn’t it.Anyway,that unhealthy competition helped me a lot, i got to know that no one can separate me and A.

After all those ups and downs, I’ve now fallen for him.Like a dream,i can’t explain how much i love him.i never thought that i would ever fall for him.He always used to say that one day he will marry me and I’ll be the mother of his future kids but i used to be like “eew never, you are my best friend and i can never fall for you”.But i don’t know how this happened, suddenly my feelings changed for him without me knowing.I don’t even know if he also feels the same for me but there is this thing,he cannot see me with other men.He always stops me from dating.Whenever he gets busy and he doesn’t visits me for long,starts replying my messages after hours,all i do is tell him that I’ve got a new boyfriend or update my status to “in a relationship”.He then starts calling me,visiting me every day,chatting with me the whole day.He also jokes a lot about loving me but i don’t know if he is really joking or he really means it.Now am planning to propose to him on the new years eve.But how do i propose to him?how do i tell him that i love him? because I’ve never proposed a guy,its my first time,and I’ve never thought that i would ever propose a guy, specially to my best Friend.Yeah i know he has a girlfriend but she is about to move to USA.its not that am thinking of to propose to him now because his gf is about to move,am doing this because I’ve recently realized that i love him and i don’t want to lose him because of my silence. Am really confused, should i do it or should i not.And if it is to do it,what will i tell him,what will i say when i would be proposing to him.Oh my,Please help,i really need help in this.

Reply December 30, 2015, 4:38 pm

confused

Okay.
So, there’s this guy I’ve known literally my whole life! That makes us have a close bond that makes it look like we’re together all the time. We’ll hug, hang on each other, change in front of each other, talk to the other about every thing, tease each other, etc. I really like him but he gives me these weird mixed signals… He’ll either be commenting on how beautiful I am, kiss me on the cheek, and hold my hand, and will stare at me and won’t break eye contact unless I do or he’ll be talking about his current relationship (he wants to break up with her now)/girls he could be interested in and if someone brings up that we’d be “a cute couple”/”we have to get married” he will blush/get shy and say that we’re just great friends that love each other. I really can’t tell his feelings and I don’t want to ruin our friendship by telling him… I don’t want to make him feel awkward about it…

I have read so many different articles and this seems like the best one so far! I have also taken the quiz but I just don’t know!

Is he really into me or am I just imagining it?
Should I tell him anyways?
Would you think the mixed signals mean something?

Reply December 6, 2015, 10:19 pm

laurence caravel

so he does like me

Reply June 5, 2017, 5:02 pm

Laneja

Hi a guy I like I asked told me he doesn’t want me to die and wasn’t weird when I told him I like him.I sometimes see him staring and he talks to his best friend about me in whisper but in front of me are these sign

Reply December 1, 2015, 6:04 pm

Confusedgirl

Oy, where to begin. I have a manager who became a friend over the years. We both have kind of hit relationship snags lately. I’m married he just broke up with his girlfriend. He always asks how home life is going. He pulls me in his office to talk about personal life stuff. He wants me to help him with work stuff all the time. When I walk by him he always smiles and says my name. Most the time my full name. He comes up to me randomly at work to vent or to just talk or say hi. I’ve been married for 8 years (separated recently) and know I developed some sort of crush does it seem he’s feeling the same. Thanks from this super naive girl.

Reply November 24, 2015, 5:24 pm

Angel Lee

Hi Eric,
Please give me your opinion. I’m totally confused. I move abroad 3 years ago. Before that I was going out with a guy for two years, we never got to date formally but become very good friends and lovers. After, I moved to USA, we keep in contact, he never got a girlfriend but just recently a week ago I saw some pics of him with a girl that is his girlfriend. To my desapoinment I wish him well without making any drama, I even told him that he deserves to be happy. He wrote me back telling me that he was thinking to tell me about this relationship but he didn’t know how :( but that he wanted to let me know that he loves me not matter and this will not change that I can always count on him. He told me that we are far away and whith out seen each other for so long thinks were very difficult realistically. After all this we both agreed to continue being good friends and not let this situation affect our friendship. So, now yesterday I stopped by to say hi to him in a Pm and he started telling me how beautiful I look in my new profile picture and asking me to sent him pictures of me. Eric, please help me what’s going on in his mind?? Is he happy with his girlfriend ? -why he acts this way if he should be happy with her and not looking into another person?
He never was this time of man, he always was very serious.
Any advise I will very much appreciate it a lot.

Reply November 19, 2015, 11:44 am

amy

hi Eric Charles,
please help me with this situation. So there’s this boy in my class and we always talk and end up laughing, at first I didn’t have any feelings for him but then I started to like him. His friends always would say something if I was there and they still do, I even took the quiz mentioned and it said he definitely liked me. Up until yesterday I thought he liked me as I always saw him glancing at me. But my best friend texted him and asked him if he liked me, his response was only as a friend then changed to maybe. She then asked him what he did like about me and he texted I don’t wanna about it and stopped replying. When I went to school today he did talk to me and we laughed like usual but something seemed off. The last period I had at school we had a couple minutes to ourselves and my teacher felt generous enough to let us talk amongst ourselves. I was talking with my group of friends and he was nearby with his, I heard my name in the conversation and I couldn’t hear anything after my name was said. Me and him then started to have a conversation and he was asking who one of my guy friends liked and that topic came up but whenever the topic of liking someone came up he never asked me who I liked but neither did I since I liked him and didn’t want to ruin what we have. He even complimented me multiple times the day before, he looked serious and I thought he did like me but I’m not so sure anymore despite the fact i did just take that quiz. I thought I saw him glancing at me today but he might have been looking somewhere else in my direction. I don’t know what to do anymore. should I tell my best friend to try to talk him into telling her how he actually feels or just see what happens?

Reply November 12, 2015, 5:33 pm

amy

i meant to say he replied saying I don’t wanna talk about it,sorry

Reply November 12, 2015, 5:36 pm

Martha

I have been talking on and off with this guy he is in his 30’s and we been like that for 3 years now. We have hungout and we have gone on dates, we have kissed and everything else except have sex. He has told me he wants me. The thing is i know he likes me or else he wouldn’t come around but the thing is I don’t understand him or what he wants because we can be texting every once and awhile and all of a sudden he’ll stop. Then later on he starts texting me out of the blue again like nothing happened. Idk he’s weird at some points but at the same time I don’t want to come at him like, im crazy and say things like hello why haven’t u been talking to me or anything like that. My question is if he’s just keeping me around cuz he’s bored or if he’s just not the type person to commit. I know that i can just ask him but i have tried before and he really doesn’t give me direct answers. Idk if that makes since. For example: he text me and said hey sexy what u doing? So I replied what I was doing and then i said I missed him. So he replied back but didn’t mention he missed me too or anything so i asked if he even missed me and he said well of course i do or else I wouldn’t have text u…..but my problem is that im just confused after 3 years we haven’t took the next step.

Reply October 13, 2015, 9:05 am

Ashley

I’m really confused by this one guy that says he wants to live with me but doesn’t want a relationship. We have been intimate in the past and says he’s willing to stop if that’ll make it easier to live together. So he wants to live with me why? I don’t understand why live with someone of the opposite sex whom you have been involved with but want to keep it platonic?

Reply October 2, 2015, 10:34 pm

Kellen

Hi, so I am having an internal debate with myself on whether this guys likes me or not.

So I have met him 6 weeks ago for an exchange programme, and we started talking normally, since we were in a small foreign group together we would always eat, go out and have classes together. My friend she ended saying she “fancied him” and as we are great friends I backed away – girl code. And at the beginning I thought he liked her too.

Then a week after we met, we went out and she started saying how she thinks he likes me and how she knows I like him too – since it was crystal clear (her words). Which I didnt know where she was taking such ideas from. Then we – this guy and I – started to talk and whenever we were having dinner we would make faces at each other, we became slightly childish; everytime I was walking alone or at the back of the group he would somehow be there next to me. Would playfully annoy me and find ways to have small conversations. But there were also times where he would be talking to his friends or stay quiet. Then once we had a group chat I gave my snapchat away so that if anyone wanted to add me they could. He was the first one to do it. Whenever we circled in a group he would come up and be centimeters away from my face, maybe he was just playing. And the closest we touched was forehead to forehead when I was telling him to drink slowly and drink with a straw hahahaha. We would sit down next to each other or just play around.

After the exchange of adding each other on Facebook and Snapchat we began to exchange snaps, we are each other’s bestfriends and has the fire streak for days. Whenever we would see each other he would make stupid faces and I would smile or laugh at them.

Now that I came back to my country we still keep in contact, when I message 95% of the time he answers straight away and so do I. My friends say that he likes me and he is interested, so I mustered half the balls to ask him online, because his friends kept interrupting whenever we seemed to be alone in person. And he said that he likes me as a friend and would be stupid to have anything go further in 5 weeks, which I understand since we dont even live in the same country. Also we had friends that had a relationship during these weeks and knew that they would end the relationship once the programme ended and this guy said he didnt want to do the same thing to anyone. And he said that we became friends and stayed as friends

We still kept in touch everyday and it seemed like I was always the last person he speaks to before he sleeps. The time I asked him for favours or suggested something he would do ir or accept it. Most of the time he is the one to message.

I dont know if its because he is being a good friend or maybe he does like me. I dont know I am the worse person to understand signs from guys, so maybe I am already in the friend zone and hoping he would like me just a little bit for nothing. His friend – well the guy he met before we went to the exchange programme said that he is not the womanizer kind of guy, so what is he?

Can you please help me understand him. He iss getting me really confused and messed up inside.

Reply September 26, 2015, 1:52 pm

Nathalie

Dear: Eric Charles

I have been receiving your emails for some time now and at first, I didn’t want to look into them because I had thought they were nuisance. After reading a few of them, it’s seem to have capture my attention and interest in what man really want in a women and how women can capture a guy’s heart and soul so easily. I would like to thank both you and Sabrina Alexis for continuing to sending me these emails about all the relationships advice, I’ll be very sure to read and carefully used them.

Normally, I don’t email people I don’t know or have heard of before, because I feel that it would seem silly and weird. But I do have a few questions for you that I’m pretty certain you have already answered, However, I would like to have answers that are more descriptive or illustrative. For example; I was watching your short video about the “7 Secrets to Make A Man Love you”, which I thought were helpful to used but I wanted to know a step by step process or guild lines in how to used them. For example; The first Secret that you had mention was : “ Man want to Win ”, that I understand and could definitely relate because I also want to feel like a winner some times too. What exactly is it that women do to make the guy feel like a winner? or that he had won something? I would like a better understanding of how it works, that pretty much goes for all the 7 secrets as well”. That was one of my common questions that I just wanted to ask you and for you to elaborate more on ( if you do not mine of course).

Before I continue to ask you more questions, I wanted to let you know a little bit about myself first, My name is Nathalie (As you already know), I’m 21 years of age and I am a college student majoring in psychology. I’m very mature for my age, I like to sing, dance and read books for fun and even go out shopping once in a while. I’m a very nice person with a great personally, but I’m also shy and quiet. I was recently in a relationship a few months ago with someone who, at first I was not interested in, but after getting to know him, I realized that he seem very nice and interesting after all. However, we have never been out dating, he doesn’t really spent time or texts me as much. He also has never brought me any gifts for me to show that he really likes me. After everything, I still had feelings for him by the end of the day. Til this day, I still feel some type of way for him, even thought were not together anymore. So my question for you is “ how do I get over him”? What should I do to get him out of my head, I don’t want to feel like breaking up with him was a big mistake or having second thoughts about coming back together with him.

Before long, I have never been in a real relationship, hell, I never been asked out on a date. I have had some men say “ if I want to hang out with them and I said yes, But after that it never happens. I used to ask some of my female friends (who had a real relationship) for advice. I would ask them questions like how did you meet him? what did you do or say to make him like you? Where do you go to find a guy? The majority have said that they have meet men online, around their neighborhood or even at church. Here’s the problem, I don’t trust online dating site because they cost to much and I cant think of being with someone who might be a psycho. I am not a party person, I do hang out at the park or movies and eat out at restaurants, but you will never find me in night clubs or bars. It is even difficult to find a guy at church, and I go to church pretty much every Sunday or when I’m able to. So I wanted to ask you these basic questions including this last one next; where and how can I meet (not just any guy ) the right guy for me?

I really hope that you read this short letter, I would like to hear your answers or comments that you might have from reading this personal text; You already know my email so your can just send your replies there. Again, Thank you so much for the articles that you have posted and your emails, I truly appreciate them.

Sincerely, Nathalie :)

Reply September 15, 2015, 12:31 pm

lacey

Ok this boy in my class keeps looking at me and one day I had my head down because people where being bullies and he came over and asked if I was on then he asked about my glasses and when I was getting new ones . My friend keeps on insisting that he likes me is she right?

Reply August 31, 2015, 12:55 am

lacey

Oops I ment to say okay not on

Reply August 31, 2015, 12:57 am

Elisa

Hi! I would like your advice on a situation i can’t quite get please ????
The son of my dad’s best friend got me a job at his workplace on my father’s suggestion. Two weeks after my first day he texts me, we talk and we agree to go drink in tokyo and spend the night there. However, 1 month after he has never spoken about going out again (we still haven’t gone to tokyo). When we are alone he never tries anything, never speaks about us and has not initiated a text convo. I have when i needed him for something but he has not answered to the last one (just quietly done what i needed him to do). It’s not like he’s shy….
At work i am always associated with him and we occasionally spend the day as if we were best friends.. He has introduced me to literally everyone that he knows. I always catch him looking at me… gently touches my arm/back in a friendly way
However he has been in a relationship for 5 years but says he wants to be ‘free’ as she has moved to America.
I used to be sure he liked me after our text convos and have tried to give hints that i like him too, but now i am not sure ???? is it possible that i have been friendzoned?

Reply August 23, 2015, 11:22 am

Anna

I really need advice. So a co-worker and I have been joking around for a while now about getting together for a drink and he has always said ‘and what else’ but lately we have been texting…yesterday he stated to me “what am I looking for” I responded to get to know you outside of work; he then responded “then what” then I stated you tell me what you are looking for he didn’t respond except stated “you tell me whatever you say will always be our secret I don’t kiss and tell. The only thing I know of is in a previous conversation he state you looking for a relationship….I’ve been there many many times happy where I am; I did let him know I know me too and I’ve been divorced. I’m not sure where this is going? Not sure how to respond but I am attracted to this guy…advise please

Reply August 8, 2015, 10:48 am

Beene

I don’t kiss & tell ….I think he just wants sex.

Reply August 17, 2015, 11:34 pm

dianna

I have a co-worker that to me is attractive. he some how started staring at me. lately, the staring is more and more. I can be working and I can feel him stare at me and when I look up, i always catch him. but he doesn’t look away at times. we lock eye contact and i smile at him. he smiles sometimes and other times he doesn’t. help me understand. thanks.

Reply August 4, 2015, 4:52 pm

Michelle

I met this guy and everything was cool I didn’t even put too much attention to him but then God he was so nice and seemed fun I got used on going to bed texting him and waking up texting him soooo then we had sex and after that he TOTALLY changed no more frequent texting, no more nice fun dude, no more of “we should do this together” and I just let it slip but then we had sez for the second time and he is even more distant. I’m the one writing to say hi or something trying tpo act normal like I usually am but he answers me cold or after hours or he leaves on “seen” he says he’s tired because of his work and that’s all but I mean I met him when he was working already and he wasn’t like this. Jeez this is exasperating, I got used to him and now I want him outta my head for good. What do I do!?

Reply July 22, 2015, 11:25 pm

Judy

Okay so there’s this guy and we’ve gone on two dates and one group date and he told me a while back that he did like me, although he never made a move, but every (texting) conversation we’ve ever had I had to start. So I stopped for a few days and he just didn’t reply, and I caved and texted him and he saw the text and never replied. What do I do

Reply June 28, 2015, 6:08 pm

jocelyn

Theirs this guy who works right next door to me.He’s really cute and I like him.I work in that store with my mom she owns it well sometimes I catch him looking at me,passing by the store alot.Like today while I was cleaning I saw him standing in his store and he was just looking at me and I know I saw him look at me its not just in my head.Also today I caught about 3 times standing by the exit of his store looking at me.My mom said when I left to buy something he passed by the store 2 times the store looking for something we don’t talk to each other but I think he could actually like me I don’t really know but could someone tell me what to do help please!

Reply June 15, 2015, 12:52 am

angel

My bf, used to visit me every weekend! Now not anymore, seems like he lost interest in me, he is not chatting to me like he used to, when I asked him about it he said I shouldn’t push him too hard, I must just let him be! He asked me once bout my feelings for him, I told him I love him, he told me, he is crazy bout me! Feeling sad becasue I didn’t heard the love word from his side, so a week later I asked him, he said, he don’t love me yet, but he is craze bout me! What do I do? What do I think? I love spending time with him! He is real a fun loving guy to be with!

Please help

Reply May 24, 2015, 8:56 am

caitlyn

hey,
so i dated this guy for quite some time and a few weeks ago he flung me off for his best friend (again) but the day he dumped me his friend (“mr.H”) started talking to me and well he has a girlfriend but he said it’s a verbally abusive relationship and that they always fight. he keeps telling me he likes me, i don’t know whether he’s just saying this to help me get over my ex or what’s going on in his mind but…. he just dumped his girlfriend but i don’t have credit to talk to him- my mind is a flutter right now help

Reply April 11, 2015, 11:03 pm

Niamh

Theres a fella that works in a pub that i go to on a Friday for lunch . He alway speaks to me first.. He hid my keys on me for an hour last week and he is always messin and jokin about when i went up to pay he called me chick .. Is he just being nice r is he flirtin ?? My cousin seems to think hes flirtin and that he does like me but i dont no

Reply March 7, 2015, 5:34 am

Felicia

He’s probably just being a good bartender looking for a good tip… But you can try getting to know him like saying, you seem to be here all the time.. Do you ever get to leave this place? Ask what he’s interested in and try to set up an out of the bar meet up. If he sounds cool about it, gives you his number or doesn’t back out then he could like you.
The fact that he called you chick means nothing lol

Reply March 22, 2015, 5:53 pm

Terra

Ok, I have been seeing this guy sporadically, mostly every other weekend. We text a bit throughout the week, but do not speak much via phone. A couple weeks ago, while on a date, I brought up (in a laughing way) that I was amazed how I hadn’t ran him off… He chuckled and said, “After meeting my friends, I thought I ran you off.” He went on to say that he just wants to take things slow, and that he thinks it important to become friends before we become anything else. We hug on every departure; the hugs seem to be getting longer, and he looks me in the eye when we talk. He is really sweet, but I’m just not sure if he is really that in to me….

Reply March 5, 2015, 1:04 am

Springfairy

Long story here.

I started working at a grocery store a year ago.I was very shy and not very talkative.
This other bagger was very nice and started conversations with me.Of course I wouldn’t talk to him much because I was shy, but slowly I opened up.About 2-3 months later, he started asking questions such as “Do you have a boyfriend? What was he like? Why’d you break up? Would you go back to him?” I just answered, to be polite.

One day he told me another co-worker said that I was the perfect girl for him and that he should take me to dinner.It didn’t kick in there that he might be asking me out.I just told him our co-worker is being silly.

Slowly, things progressed, one day I was having a bad day, so I went outside during break and he was going home, He noticed I was sad, so he walked over, I tried to pull away, but he kept getting closer.And asked what was wrong.I wouldn’t talk, then he said “You can tell me when its just the two of us.I’ll be here.” Then he rubbed my cheek and told me I was beautiful.

A couple weeks later, we were in the break room, and he was playfully teasing me.I accidentally tripped and felt stupid, but he found it cute.He said “You need a boyfriend to catch you when you fall.” I responded with “When I find a boyfriend, I will let you know.” He gave me a puzzled look and then said “How about going out with me?” I said yes, we set up a day.He gave me his number, but didn’t want mine.He added me on facebook as well.

The day came to go, and I went there.After about 20 mins, I texted him.He told me his brother had a heart attack and asked if we could schedule, so not to be a bitch, I gave him the benefit of the doubt and said sure.

The next day at work, he wanted to make sure I wasn’t upset.He kept asking if I was mad and apologize.I told him I understood.He brought up rescheduling a few times, but I never did.

After a while, his flirting and attempts stopped.And so I assumed he wasn’t interested.So I stayed away, and didn’t bother him, but when I did this, he assumed I was upset with him, and kept trying to get me to tell what was on my mind.

One of our co-workers got divorced, and I saw these two come from the yogurt shop.So I assumed he was interested in her, She was on my facebook friend list and so is he, and she was on his as well.Until recently, he started in again.

I was upstairs and he was waiting to clock in.I was sitting there.He starts looking at me and smiling.I glance his way, and he smiles, I look away and go back to texting.He looks back at me, and then finally I say “What’s your problem?” He laughs and says nothing.I start watching youtube videos and he starts making weird noises.I start laughing, and he does too.He said “Good, I’m getting you to laugh” I looked away.He’s like “That’s a good thing you know.” I responded with “Yeah, okay.” He then said “I dare you text me right now.” I was like “Ok” but kept watching youtube vidos.He said “Come on, text me.” I asked him what he wanted to text me.I said “What do you want to text me?” He told me to text anything.So I wrote hi.He responded, what’s up.And then he sat and watched me, I read it, but I kept watching youtube.He said “Come on, keep the texting going.” I was like “Why?” He said “I have a surprise text for you.” I said “We’re sitting across from each other, just say what you want to text.” He goes beat red and laughs.And keeps looking at me until I finally text.He asked me to lunch again, and gave me his days off.I told him I worked both days, and he yelled at the top of his lungs “Darn it” I said “say that again, I don’t think they heard you in africa.” He laughed.

The next day, same situation. Except I got the hiccups, and he started teasing me.I went to take a drink of soda and he was like “I don’t tink soda’s going to help.” I said probably not, but oh well.He laughed.And he started talking about how much was his favorite month and asked me to guess.I again got the hiccups and got up and got a drink of water from the fountain.He said “Your funny.” I was like “I’m not trying to -hiccup- be” and he smiled and laugh.So I guessed he liked march because it was his birthday.He said yep, guess my day.I said the day and it was a day off.He was like “that was a great guess, smart woman.” Then he asked me what he should do for his birthday, I told him I didn’t have any ideas.He said maybe go to hard rock.I said “That sounds good.” He then went to tell me about a place he flies to that he enjoys, that he thinks I might enjoy.I told him “Sounds fun, but I hate flying so I won’t be traveling there.” He then went on to ask why I hated flying.I told him how I have very bad panic attacks on planes.He said “What if your mom or friends were with you.” I said said “Nope, they hate flying as well.” He then looked over and said “What if you were with me? Would you feel better?” I paused and said “Maybe, I don’t know.I really hate flying.” He responded “You could hold on to my hand for as long as you wanted, I wouldn’t let anything happen.We’d go to Vegas and have a good time.” I kept insisting that I hate flying, he kept insisting he’d protect me and we’d have a good time.Then he asked if I liked hockey and had ever been to a game.I said yes and no I haven’t.He did a “hmm” Then it was time for me to clock in.

That night when I went on to facebook, our other co-worker had posted a disney quiz she shared.And I noticed facebook no longer said “1 Mutual Friend: so and so” so I checked my friend list and both were still there.I was puzzled as usually facebook states when we have mutual friends.Then I noticed he was no longer on her list.Either he removed her or she removed him.Made me think that he was just leading me on and their involved.Got a bit hurt, but I went on with my night.

Next day was my day off, so I went in and got a haircut in the salon next door to my store.Then I went into the store to buy a snack and kitten food.I was cashing out and he was bagging.He said “You got a haircut? It looks lovely.” I said “Thank you” and then he said.”It smells nice too.” This embarrassed me a bit, I admit.I turned away and said “Thank you.” the cashier turned to him and he said “Are you hitting on her?”
The guy in question laughed and said “I’m not.” The cashier responded. “I’m gonna tell your girfriend.” He went red and said “I don’t have a girlfriend.” So I joined in, and I was like “Yeah, we should tell her, she’s not gonna be happy.” He was like “Really, I don’t have a girlfriend.” I was like ” We’re embarrasing him.” He responded. “Yes, yes you are.” I responded.”Good, you embarrased me multiple times.” He laughed. I grabbed my bag and he said “See you later, sweety.” I said bye and left.

Yesterday at work, I wasn’t feeling well.I was waiting to clock in.He was walking by to go bag, and then he looked and saw me.He stopped and said “Hey,(used my name) But I didn’t respond.He asked if I was okay, I smiled, but didn’t say anything.He started walking over in my direction, but I pulled a way a bit.He said “Oh….I’m getting a drink” And I I noticed I was blocking the fountain.I responded. “Oops, sorry.” He asked again if I was feeling okay.I said “Yeah, sure.” He touched my shoulder and told me to let him know.

Then He was bagging next to me, he keeps looking at me all the time when we’re working together, I can see it out of the corner of my eye.But I don’t look because I don’t want him to catch me looking.He always fidgets with his clothes a lot.More than what I consider to be “needing to be fixed.” Anyways, he was talking to a customer.And the customer asked how he was doing.He said “I’m doing good.But I need a good woman in my life.” He said it loud enough for me to hear.And I took it as
“I’m not interested in you”

But I’m so confused because he has done a lot to make me think he was interested.
He always is trying to please my mother.And has told my sister that I’m a beautiful hard working girl.

What is everyone’s thought on this.

Reply March 4, 2015, 2:02 am

Autumn

Also one day, I was clocking in, and then I started walking around the corner.We ran right into each other.He was like “HELLLLLOOO” and laughed.

Then later he did it again, but this time I was clocking out, and I turned around, he was right behind me and was reaching for the clock.I’m like “God, you gave me a heart attack, don’t do that.” He laughed “Sorry, hun”.

Reply March 4, 2015, 2:06 am

Felicia

This seems super childish. I think he likes you based on all he’s done and said (possibly a bit of a creep, but if you like him then its fine). I think you should just go up to him and be like. Do you want to go on a date with me or not? Or next time he flirts tell him to make good on it and take you out. If he doesn’t then tell him to quit it.

Reply March 22, 2015, 5:59 pm

jhane

hi, i just want to know if My crush like me back,, i started to notice him when he called me “hi miss ” the first day he notice me, then the next day when i walking home he called me “Babe ” that when i started to like him then i told to my self if he talk to me tomorrow that means he like me too but he didn’t so I’m upset,, i don’t know if he just making fun of me I’m confused,,, what can you say My situation? please answer me i just really want to know if he like me too…

Reply February 13, 2015, 10:15 pm

Jay

There are these two guys in school, one of them I’m sure really likes me and he has made some moves while the other one has told me and has chased me for complete 4mnths but I turned him down and now he has backed out and I miss him although he steal glances at me, but when he was after me he didnt regularly call but he texts regularly on social networks. The first guy regularly calls but don’t always text, he is the shy type though. I just want to know how I’ll start up a convo with the second guy that will make him chase me again without looking awkward. I try to make him jealous at times by hanging out with other guys.
Jay

Reply January 22, 2015, 3:15 pm

Hailey

Hi!
I am a freshman in high school and I have three guys that I THINK are interested but I have no idea how to be sure.
The first one I have known FOREVER since like, second grade. He will talk to me and tease me. Sometimes I even catch him staring at me. He also tends to sometimes ignore me. He will like touch me and stuff, but he does so to like EVERYONE. He has also talked to me about this other girl he likes. Mixed signals…
The second one is a sophmore who I just met doing a play. He will goof around with me and tease me especially. He tries to talk to me but we are in rehearsals…
The third one is a football player in my math class. I sat next to him the first semester and he would constantly compliment me on my drawings. This semester we both moved teachers and we are in the same period math. We were put in a group to work on a worksheet and he teased me (in a good way) about my stupid anticipation of the fire drill that was planned. I’ve also caught him staring multiple times…
Please help, I am so confused on who likes me and who doesn’t. I like all three and I can’t use the “kiss” method because I haven’t had a first kiss and I’m afraid to have it with the wrong person. Thanks!

Reply January 21, 2015, 9:27 pm

shirly

I have been seeing this guy since july, we met online and he was charming. Throughout the summer we saw each other on a good basis but then school started and we only saw each other once every month. We haven’t had sex since october and we recently a week ago or so finally got alone time but did not go further than making out and touching there and there. And the times that we saw each other after the last time having sex he would make the effort of taking the train from his school to come see me in my town but he has only done that twice right before the last time we have sex and after. At that time( the 2nd time he came to see me) I felt myself being kinda clingy to him and him being kind distant but still good to me) after that time we had made plans to see each other thanksgiving weekend because he was going to have his car. a week before i made a comment that i might not be able to have sex because there was a chance i would be on my period. later that week i told him that i wasnt sure i wanted to see him because i felt like he was distant or something and he responded “oh.. well whatever decision you make is fine” of course i felt awful but all i wanted was to keep him and went back on what i said a few things went back and forth. so the next day we were talking and i asked about saturday and he told me that he couldn’t. so i asked about sunday and he ignored, and i could see he read my message so an hour later i said “?” and he read too and ignored me of course i was furious so later that evening i told him he was awful and he ignored that too so in the morning i txted him saying stop ignoring me, its the worst u could do so to this he texted back im sorry i didnt mean to, and all im thinking is yes u did u could ignored me without thought. and his excuse was that he was going to a concert with friend for his friends birthday i was still really up (upset in way that i was crying all night) but i asked him a few questions and forgave because all i wanted was to be with him. and tbh i think that im still really hurt till this day, i just feel like betrayed or something so later that month i asked him if he could see me that weekend and he said ill see if im free. dont ask how i found out but later that night this other girl asked him about the weekend too and without hesitation he said yes to her (it wouldve been the first time meeting with her) of course i was angry with him so i texted him saying nevermind i have other plans and he said okay.. the next day he texted me saying hi and i acted like nothing was wrong because i wasnt supposed to know about this girl. i have also found a lot of things about him that later i have casually asked him about myself like “i bet youve told other girls u want to see where things are going” and i knowing that he has when he says no i know he is lying to me. and this has happened a few times. but a week ago when i saw him, he kissed me with intenseness and told me how much he had missed me told me and that he wanted to see me again. there were times in that date where i was just sad because i had been hurt by him even though i acted like everything was okay at the end of it he asked me if i was okay because there were times where he would look over and i had a really sad face on( i didn’t think he had notice) and i told him that yes i was okay and fine. lately ive been the one texting first but occasionally he does. and when i lash out on him for not responding to a text (even a simple text like mhm, i dont know why i do this) he tells me that he does care and this stuff that in my head im just think god this is bullshit. and i have rambled on probably havent made much sense in this comment but all i want is just someone to look at this and tell me im wasting my time or something. i just dont know what to do and i feel lost. every conversation with him sucks and we have nothing to talk about. tbh what i really what is for him to tell me truth u know tell me that he is not interested anymore that he is only leading me on or something because he keeps saying that he isnt leading me on and that he cares and such but i know that his doesnt and maybe he is trying to distant himself but i won’t let him and idk how many times ive told him to stop ignoring some of my text (he never ignores hellos) but he just doesnt t and from your articles ive been told that the nagging only encourages them to keep doing it so idk if thats the case or its his of saying i dont care. theres also been times ive been like one more time and its over of course he doesnt again and its not over and maybe he sees me backing down from my remark so he knows i wont go away. but thats the thing though i like him so much that i find impossible to just get up and leave and i guess what im asking is how i can make him tell me the truth and give me straight up reason to be done with him.

Reply December 31, 2014, 6:31 pm

Kimberly

He is obviously not into you. Im sure you can clearly see that but, you don’t want to admit it
Why do you say you want him to tell you the truth when yalready know the truth.? A
It will only hurt you worse. I say, get out of the mentally abusive relationship before you regret the heartache and tears. There are way more men out there that will love and appreciate you. You should have No doubt and have to question a man’s for you. You must know your self worth. You deserve better!

Reply February 10, 2015, 11:42 pm

shirly

I have been seeing this guy since july, we met online and he was charming. Throughout the summer we saw each other on a good basis but then school started and we only saw each other once every month. We haven’t had sex since october and we recently a week ago or so finally got alone time but did not go further than making out and touching there and there. And the times that we saw each other after the last time having sex he would make the effort of taking the train from his school to come see me in my town but he has only done that twice right before the last time we have sex and after. At that time( the 2nd time he came to see me) I felt myself being kinda clingy to him and him being kind distant but still good to me) after that time we had made plans to see each other thanksgiving weekend because he was going to have his car. a week before i made a comment that i might not be able to have sex because there was a chance i would be on my period. later that week i told him that i wasn’t sure i wanted to see him because i felt like he was distant or something and he responded “oh.. well whatever decision you make is fine” of course i felt awful but all i wanted was to keep him and went back on what i said a few things went back and forth. so the next day we were talking and i asked about saturday and he told me that he couldn’t. so i asked about sunday and he ignored, and i could see he read my message so an hour later i said “?” and he read too and ignored me of course i was furious so later that evening i told him he was awful and he ignored that too so in the morning i txted him saying stop ignoring me, its the worst u could do so to this he texted back im sorry i didnt mean to, and all im thinking is yes u did u could ignored me without thought. and his excuse was that he was going to a concert with friend for his friends birthday i was still really up (upset in way that i was crying all night) but i asked him a few questions and forgave because all i wanted was to be with him. and tbh i think that im still really hurt till this day, i just feel like betrayed or something so later that month i asked him if he could see me that weekend and he said ill see if im free. dont ask how i found out but later that night this other girl asked him about the weekend too and without hesitation he said yes to her (it wouldve been the first time meeting with her) of course i was angry with him so i texted him saying nevermind i have other plans and he said okay.. the next day he texted me saying hi and i acted like nothing was wrong because i wasnt supposed to know about this girl. i have also found a lot of things about him that later i have casually asked him about myself like “i bet youve told other girls u want to see where things are going” and i knowing that he has when he says no i know he is lying to me. and this has happened a few times. but a week ago when i saw him, he kissed me with intenseness and told me how much he had missed me told me and that he wanted to see me again. there were times in that date where i was just sad because i had been hurt by him even though i acted like everything was okay at the end of it he asked me if i was okay because there were times where he would look over and i had a really sad face on( i didn’t think he had notice) and i told him that yes i was okay and fine. lately ive been the one texting first but occasionally he does. and when i lash out on him for not responding to a text (even a simple text like mhm, i dont know why i do this) he tells me that he does care and this stuff that in my head im just think god this is bullshit. and i have rambled on probably havent made much sense in this comment but all i want is just someone to look at this and tell me im wasting my time or something. i just dont know what to do and i feel lost. every conversation with him sucks and we have nothing to talk about. tbh what i really what is for him to tell me truth u know tell me that he is not interested anymore that he is only leading me on or something because he keeps saying that he isnt leading me on and that he cares and such but i know that his doesnt and maybe he is trying to distant himself but i won’t let him and idk how many times ive told him to stop ignoring some of my text (he never ignores hellos) but he just doesnt t and from your articles ive been told that the nagging only encourages them to keep doing it so idk if thats the case or its his of saying i dont care. theres also been times ive been like one more time and its over of course he doesnt again and its not over and maybe he sees me backing down from my remark so he knows i wont go away. but thats the thing though i like him so much that i find impossible to just get up and leave and i guess what im asking is how i can make him tell me the truth and give me straight up reason to be done with him.

Reply December 31, 2014, 6:30 pm

Harleigh Waddell

this boy name Cade he keeps touching my leg, shoulder, & thigh…. He told me that he does not like me, not but he keeps touching me and I have to sit with him… what should I do?????

Reply December 6, 2014, 10:45 am

Davinki

That is one of the most positive, well thought out, true observations i have ever read from a male perspective. It is really just the bottom line, the really fine print, all the cliches that explain the male mind without having to explain them. Mostly women are in control. ( ” I think a good man is well aware of that.

Reply December 4, 2014, 6:57 pm

anna

What do I say to my ex on text for him to naturally be committed to me ? Something about my personality that he doesn’t like and something that broke us apart. Now he is just checking me out but likes someone else meanwhile. He always comes back to me so many times and leaves me for a another girl. I just don’t know what to say to him to impress him and to stay with me and commit to me, no one else. Why would he always come back to me! He is missing me way to much for him to reject me he likes what I look like and how I dress and all of the fun stuff but I don’t know what to say to him. Give me some advice pleaseeeee!

Ps : the way he acts he unreal he always leaves and he just not committed , how do I make him committed to me what do I say?

Reply November 28, 2014, 3:45 pm

Karin

Please help me i need your advice!!
I’m in relationship with a guy i never meet before. We know each other through chatting application a years ago. We lived in different country. We began our relationshiph as friend… he told me he like me and i told him i like him to… every day we became more intimated… And suddenly many things happened for past 6 months. We once stopped contacting each other for about 4 or 5 months. During that time i suddenly realized that i really love him… My friend told me to give up because its impossible to us to be together. I know it well, but at least i just wanna confessed to him about my feeling. so i did it… I conffesed to him and said this will be the last message i sent to him. He replay with surprised. He didnt predict that i would fall for him because the fact that we’re just know each other by chatting app and cant meet in real life. He keep apologize and said that he was a bad man who hurt me. That time i knew for sure he already reject me, so i think i need to give up on him. but, he said to me that he will fly to my country and meet me, he even asked me to marry him (twice). He also asked me to wait for him some years until he have enough money to see me. We’re both students in university. he’s type of person who will fullfill his promises, intellegent and kind so i decide to believe him and wait for him. he told me that he love me in every text he sent me. But suddenly he stop contacting me and said he was busy etc. I dont know what should i do. I mean, i began to doubt is he really love me or not. though i wont ever doubt them. i dont care what people say about me relationship with him or even about me. The told me it hopeless but i really want to prove them it wasnt hopeless at all. But things that he stop contact me is really disturbing. Im afraid that he will leave me. what should i do? Its the first time for me feeling like this. I’ll wait for your answer. Thank you so much and sorry for my bad english.

Reply November 28, 2014, 1:25 am

Rose

Hello Eric

I guess I really need your help..
There is that one guy that I like and I am not sure he likes me or not.
But he is really nice to meet like overly nice to me.
He cooked me dinner more than twice.
He tried to tease me like playful tease.
He started the conversation even it is not necessary.
He always said he is protecting me or will protect me.
When I told him that he cannot carried me,he carried me half of the way home.
He touch my back sometimes and invade my personal space.
When I compliments other guys (his friends) infront of him, he tried to say my compliments is wrong or sometimes he just don’t say anything.
But he told how other girls are hot infront of me and I feel jealous.
Do you think he is interest in me?
Ah..one thing..when I told him..you are just being nice man by cooking for me or helping me out.He said ‘if I think that way, I am dump’
Please help me..I need to know this.
I am 21 and he is 25.

Reply November 25, 2014, 6:06 pm

Stephanie

Theres this guy who I “dated” 6 years ago for about 4 or 5 months. He was heavy into drugs and alcohol and I was neive enough at that point in time to not know what addiction was. As far as I was concerened, this guy was just fun, and cared for me but wasn’t looking for a commitment, but I was. We went to a party and I came out of the bathroom to find another girl in his lap, and I had no real claim over him back then (or I didn’t know how to lay claim vocally) so I just turned around and walked away. Long story short, we parted ways, pretty much with me destroying his life for a good 2 to 3 months. I convinced him and his family that I was pregnant.. I know. It was a horrible thing to do.

I spent the following 3 years with this lingering fear that he would come back and destroy my life as I had his. I had built this wonderful new life, and I didn’t want my past to come back, especially this. Eventually, my secret was made common knowledge and I was past the fear. Over the years, he would facebook message me here and there, and I would either ignore it or tell him to leave me alone.

Back in June of this year, I was in the middle of an Awakening and I was pretty much cleansing myself of all the bad. I finally admitted to him that I lied about it (everyone knew but it was the words that meant something) and apologized and he forgave me. Immediately. We talked here and there until a little over a month ago when he walked in to my store out of no where!

It was a bit strange the first meeting, but we instantly clicked right back into our comfort zone. We’ve been seeing one another since that night. I asked him why he came. He said he was tired of thinking about me and not doing anything about it. (yes, my heart skipped a beat) He told me that 6 years ago, all he knew he had was me and drugs, and he picked the drugs over me. He regretted the influence he was under during our time together and wanted to do it again. He is 100% clean of all drugs and alcohol (I am as well), and our connection just keeps growing.

We live an hour away from one another and we work crazy hours the both of us. I don’t know where to go from here. But I do know, it feels like it’s meant. Is this an example of ‘if you let it go, and it comes back to you, its yours’? Please, any comments, or advice, to keep him in my life forever would be very much appreciated.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Reply November 24, 2014, 8:59 pm

ronamie dosdos

hello eric!

Am I too assuming if I would say that this guy really likes me?
He once told me that he wanted me to be his girlfriend and I told him that we could never possibly be. Because what’s in my mind is that he is too young for me (2 years gap) and that he just wanted to hook up to cover up his previous relationship..

but I could feel it sometimes based on the way how he will hold my hand and hug whenever we sees each other and the way he cares about me especially when I cry.

does this mean something or just some friendly act/ or worse a sisterly act?

Reply November 24, 2014, 6:55 am

anna

My ex keeps on starring at me and he starting to check me out alot and he passes by my locker at school at the end of the day . he didn’t do it since we broke up since now he is starting too and he told his friends that I’m hot and attractive. But im not talking to him? Will he ever talk to me again? Does he like me again? Should I wait until he talks to me or should I start it?

Reply November 6, 2014, 9:33 pm

shirly

so this has happened to me before, and my ex did like me a little but only because he re saw that i was attractive once we got back together we both realized why we had broken up. But if you want him back start talking him but this time be in charge of the relationship don’t let him get on top of you, it will only make him want you more. I did this in another occasion and he was begging for me but once i showed that i was interested in him more then he was in me he disappeared again. guys don’t like knowing that you are over them or stop caring as much so they will try to get that back and once they have they will remember why they broke up with you so don’t let him see that u care about him more then he cares about you.

Reply December 31, 2014, 6:43 pm

Riley Roth

Does it mean he likes me when he stares and then i see him and he looks away?

Reply November 4, 2014, 7:35 pm

Not telling

My crush has a list of who he likes and I am second the girl he likes. Sometimes he takes things away from me and I allow him to sometimes, one day he took one of my earphones and started listening to my music with me what does that mean?

Reply October 7, 2014, 10:36 am

Salima

Eric:

Hi, how are you?

I need you explain at first the circumstances of all of this. So I was working at the switchboard head office of a Bank last summer and as you can imagine we actually receives thousand of calls every day from professionals. Some of these calls were always from the same compagnies, and with one of the guy who used to call, Thomas, (because he said that he was crazy about my voice and because I was always making people laugh) we started to talk about more than “professional staff” and it became more personal. He asked me many questions about what I like, what kind of person I am, and blablabla. he called like 30/40 times a day, and when he couldn’t be in touch with me, he asked my colleagues about me.
My job at the bank ended on Monday 4 August so he gave me his e-mail address, as I couldn’t give him my last name. Before he had to leave on holidays (4 August), he asked me to join him on a BBQ(the 1 August) with all of his colleagues at lunch but I couldn’t cause i was working. But right after the BBQ ended, he called me at the office, and said that he had to drink mojitos because I was not there. (see this is the kind of staff that he used to tell me, or like “after this call , which is the last of the day, you’ll be in my mind”) However on the 9 August I sent him an e-mail, asking how he was doing. the thing is that he answered really nicely, and told me that I had a message from him on Facebook. since that day we became friends on Facebook. In our first messages, we used to speak very politely, and the 30th August he started speaking casually. so I think that it was a big move. One thing, that might be important, it is that after he came back from holiday and before I had to leave to my new city, we planned to meet. however, I had to leave earlier, so we couldn’t make it.
The thing is that I’m always the one who send the first message. and well, it’s been two time, now three that he doesn’t answer right away, have gotta wait like days or sometime one week. well, for the first message he said that he was at work when he read it and completely forgot to answer. The second, during one week I had no news so I sent him a message back and he explained that someone died and this was on 2th October. yesterday I sent him a message to ask him how he was going. But no answer. he read the message, but no answer. when we start texting, it doesn’t stop. We talk about many subjects, but it’s not as it was before when he used to call me at the office. He always ask me how I am doing, if a made friend in my new city (cause I moved from Paris to Grenoble). We laughed about a funny subject, however about it he just said that the principal is that I still be myself which is the most important. and at the same time, cause I didn’t know what do do after he told me that someone died, he just told me that I was cute.
So after all this, I don’t know what is going on. Before we became friend on Facebook, he never sees me, no pictures, nothing. and so before Facebook, it was great. but before Facebook, I was working at the office where he called all the time.
And after Facebook, there was pictures, there was no more office, so no more calls.
I do think that if it was because he didn’t liked the way I look, then today we wouldn’t be in touch anymore, right? but then, what should I do?
how do I know that he likes me as a friend or more?
Because I wanted to to hear he voice again, I gave him my phone number, saying hat he could call anytime, and so he said that he would call me by the end of the week and it is been one month.
So please, tell me, what is going on? cause I’m completely lost!

Thank you for reading it, for your answer, and also for everything you do here. cause it kind of very helpful. because I have to say that when our heart is not at its right place, then we are completely upside down.

girls if you have answer, i take it!
my pleasure,
sam

Reply October 4, 2014, 5:30 am

Patrik

He is constantly raising his eyebrow, biting his lip, and looking at me. But he is dating a girl. He kisses her as fast as possible, but only when I’m around. He’s raised his eyebrow at me when next to her. I’m always so confused by him though, he talks about how she gives him a blowjob, and hand-job, but only around me. He fixes his hair, and even brushes up against me sometimes. Does he like me, or is he just playing a game?

Reply September 29, 2014, 1:54 am

heather

Sounds like he is trying to make you jealous. I would ignore him when he does this, kind of like not rewarding bad behavior and acknowledge him when he isn’t doing this stuff and see what he does.

Reply September 29, 2014, 4:25 am

heather

I have a male friend that I have known for about 12 years.

In the beginning we were just getting to know each other. About 2 years ago he started tutoring me alone at his place for my physics class. That was when I really started to fall for him. Before he was just the cute guy friend.

Over the last couple years we saw a movie alone, did other one on one activities and in my opinion flirting with each other.

The one thing that has always thrown me off is the fact that I need to start the conversations most of the time with him. We have some things in common- movies and music taste, same opinion of morals and we are both loyal people.

Over the last couple years he has stared at me longer than needed, showed off to get my attention, let his hands linger when passing me items, been protective of me when strange men(to him, I know whom they are) approach me to chat, stand shoulder to shoulder with me, hold an umbrella for me once, pays for everything and always stay back to help me carry stuff.

He recently has taken an interest in the freaky sexual stuff I am interested in. He also confided in my recently to the point where he broke down.

It seems like he likes me but I can’t tell

Reply September 19, 2014, 10:09 pm

Patrik

Because I myself am a man, I am almost completely sure he likes you, either that, or he thinks of you as a sister. I am friends with many women, and find myself being protective even though I have a major crush on a boy.

Reply September 29, 2014, 4:55 am

V

Please help, I know this guy for about three months now, and though I am always the one that gets emotionally attached very quickly, I decided to myself that I will have to take another route with this one, as I don’t want to get my heart broken again. Also I just have to mention that we have a long distance relationship, but for the past three weeks we have been traveling up and down to see each other. He told me that his last relationship has hurt him a lot, when his ex cheated on him, so he just want a casual no “feeling” relationship for now. I was open for this, but I am receiving a load of mixed signals, so much that I feel I am getting whiplash from moving back and front with this guy. After the no feeling relationship he wanted for now, he has asked me three times to leave my pills, so that I can have his baby, he has suggested five times that I move in with him and that he will buy me a car etc. I am very independent and he has a lot of money, but this does not matter to me, and even though I really like him, I feel very insecure, as when I start hinting in a direction that I am having feelings, he just reminds me again of the non-feeling relationship we have. What should I do?

Reply August 25, 2014, 7:41 am

Elaine

I REALLY like this guy, Danny. I’ve known him for about 2and a half years now. I met him the summer after my freshman year now I’m going to be a senior. Right now he’s 22 and I’m 17. He’s Said he like me but he said it months ago but at the time I didn’t catch on so he thinks I don’t pay attention to when he talks. I ride the bus for 2-3 hours to go hang out with him at his place, nothing really happens but usually I stay with him from 9am-8pm. One of my friends asked me to date him 6 separate time

Reply August 6, 2014, 11:50 pm

muddslinger

Had a guy boarding at my house a few years back, like over 10 years ago. I think he did like me as I felt him staring at me on the sly quite a few time. Nice guy and I did like him but could say or act on anything at the time due to going thru personal issues & a divorce. Long story short he moved out after a year and within the next year following had married someone else (second marriage for him).
Well lately I’ve run across him a few times and now he just plain stares hard, doesn’t even try to hide it anymore. Far as I know he’s still married. So wtf is up with that. It’s actually starting to creep me out in a way.

Reply July 28, 2014, 9:09 am

muddslinger

Ooops….that should read ‘could NOT say or act on anything’

Reply July 28, 2014, 9:12 am

Tira

Hi Eric,
I really hope I can hear from you. In my past I have been in some bad relationships and so has this guy. We both like each other, we’ve told each other this, but then he tells me that he doesn’t want to hurt me and pretty my friend zones me. I just understand why this is happening and was wondering if there was anything at all I could do to change this. Please help!

Reply July 12, 2014, 1:30 am

Kari

So I’ve known him for 3 years and he knows that I used to like him. I’m pretty sure that he liked me briefly last year. Now my friend has a crush on him and stuff. She hangs out with him and other people in their neighborhood often. When I see him he seems to glance at me a lot and tease me. My friend was upset an told me that he talks about me all the time. Does he like me? What am I supposed to do?

Reply July 5, 2014, 10:12 pm

Sophie

Help. Please. I’m a senior in high-school, he’s a sophomore, We have class together and are in marching band together which means we spend a lot of time either alone of almost (its a small school). We joke, play-fight, tease, compliment, and are pretty close to each other. We talk about everything, even the difficult stuff. He’s told me how attractive he thinks I am, but we’re just friends. Here’s the thing. He has a girlfriend. We’ve been like this for years. My ex and I just broke up because he’s going far away to college. It was a 3 yr relationship. I don’t know if I’m friend zoned or not. His girlfriend hates me and claims she’s losing him to me now. The stress of their relationship makes it hard for us to be friends because I don’t want him to have to lose a girlfriend for me. His friendship is worth too much for me to throw away, but I don’t know how to tell if he wants more.

Reply July 1, 2014, 12:52 am

ashmi

I like dis guy from work.. He was so nice to me a couple of days.. Complimenting about my smile n how cheerful I was.. Then he just gives me tat look..I can feel he’s not tat into me anymore.. Not starting a conversation like he used to start before. But he always looks at me n seems to notice Wat I’m doing..He has noticed me talking to a couple of guys from. Tat place.. I’m so confused.. Does dis guy reli like me.Pls help..

Reply May 26, 2014, 2:46 am

Kim

Wow. I love how the article says don’t over think things. Then there’s like a hundred posts from women who share six paragraphs of over thinking and analyzing. I think we all instinctively know if someone likes us. If we’re rationalizing too much it means we’re trying to convince ourselves they like us when they really don’t.

Reply February 19, 2014, 12:19 pm

Eric Charles

Yeah – I agree with you.

I don’t mean any disrespect to the women who took the time to write comments here (believe me, I appreciate it)… but most of the time when someone is coming to me with a relationship issue, it’s because they desperately want the situation to work out and it’s not a situation that was ever working in the first place.

Another way more accurate way to put it would be to say that they were never on the same page. Maybe the guy wanted to have a casual, no-strings attached fling and she wants him to get down on one knee and have babies right now. Or he’s not that into her and she’s decided he’s her soul mate.

It’s what I call trying to shove a square peg through a round hole. And to your sentiment of women knowing instinctively if a guy is into them, I agree… it’s just that in most cases when a woman WANTS a guy to be into her, she has this idea that she can make him into her. I blame Hollywood for this perverse notion…

Reply February 19, 2014, 2:42 pm

Davinki

I know he is into me and i know HOW he is into me. These words are very simple. I want more from him but I also know what our relationship is. So i can confide he likes me but i cant confide Im his one and only …but i can act like i am until, he makes it clear im not. Be happy when hes into you. He is into you. Its the same with men. Its almost like woman want to conquer in an ultimate way whereas men just want to conquer. Women need to see things on a basic level if they want to reach a man at all. Good advise Eric. Much clarity should ensue …in time i think.

Reply December 4, 2014, 7:10 pm

Springfairy

Well, it doesn’t help when said guy tells you things like.”I had a dream about you last night, and in the dream you kissed me.” Or tells you that he would protect you and wouldn’t let anything happen to you if you go to vegas with him.Or asks you if you would date someone his age or gets touchy-feely with you.Its all very misleading.

Reply March 4, 2015, 1:30 am

Sam

Hi Eric,
I need some help… I feel so silly doing this but I have gotten to a point where things have got weird. So one of my childhood friends got in contact with be in December and we’v been talking none stop for the past few weeks. He I guess made me feel like he likes me but I’m not so sure about it no more. I have tried to ask him out I put my self out there for this guy and he like wont respond. I guess I came on to strong for him. I only say that because he’s tolled me he is shy when it comes to dating so I took the lead and asked him out on a double date. I thought it was a good idea and that if it was a double date he wont feel pressured. But even so I don’t see why he will feel any tip of way we have hangout. I mean it was once. I guess I came on to strong, I just don’t know. I need some advice…

Reply January 17, 2014, 11:00 am

Haley

This guy I thought was cute started to flirt with me and I flirted back, we were like this a couple days, he complimented me a lot, updated his status with things related to me and we laughed a lot. He told me my smile could make him fall in love, and we joked that we were together. He tend today flirted with me further, implying he felt something but then he told me he only liked me a bit and that my personality was awesome but liked a lot of girls the same way. Then I reacted because I hate getting screwed over and I said it was okay and that I was still hooked on my ex. He then reacted to that saying he never meant he wanted a relationship with me. So i said everything was cool and we continued as if nothing happened. Lie, it did hurt me I really thought he really liked me. But I do know that he likes me, that’s pretty obvious by the way he talks to me. Did I do it right? Can I still pursue something with him?

Reply December 23, 2013, 1:49 am

Mercedes

Silly boy. Of course you thought he was trying to pursue something. When he said “Your smile could make me fall in love, blah, blah, blah,” it sounded like he was saying “Hey! I’m falling for you. Just thought I’d let you know!” The reality is, he probably really does like you, a lot. But as a silly boy, he also likes flirting with other girls and getting reactions from them too. You did good by playing it cool but now you have to be true to yourself.. This boy hurt you. That’s not ok. He can’t just say things like that & then turn around like “Dude. I never wanted a relatiionship with you!” He’s playing games. Don’t play into his game girl. He’s having too much fun. You did everything right and now you’re all the wiser for it. Next time he tries flirting you, laugh it off. If he really, truly wants a relationship with you, let him pursue the heck out of you. You’re a gem with an obviously gourgeous smile. You’re worth the effort. :)

Reply December 23, 2013, 10:03 am

Confused

Alright. I’ve been doing bjj for about 2 and a half years now and there’s this guy (who used to be my coach) that I’ve liked since I first saw him. At first I thought he was the best looking guy in the world, but now I found out he’s really cool and has an extensive sense of humor. He’s always knew who I was because I continued to rise through the ranks of my gym, but we never really talked until about Spring Break of my sophomore year in high school (I’m a junior now). It started when he asked me to play baseball with the camp kids everyday during break and we had fun. We would play on a team against the kids and were super competitive. Then school ended and I left for a week to go visit family so I missed the first week of summer camp where I assisted all day every weekday. As soon as I got back he said “oh look who’s here” and then we talked a little bit that day and everyday forward. This was super new to me because he almost never talked to me. The conversations were always pure humor unless he felt like disciplining me for whatever reason (he’s my superior. I’m 16 and he’s 19). As summer camp winded down in the last few weeks we went on two field trips together with the kids in the same car and he would always sing all loudly and we would talk about Vine videos (we still do). He would always take me in his car when he could and sometimes complimented me on my bjj. So summer ended and time went by he began to open up to me more. He went from disciplining me to respecting me and from treating me like a student to being playfully violent and making weird faces and sounds to get my attention. I noticed that he used to get all mad when I argued with him while we played a game but now he doesn’t even care, he just laughs and playfully argues back. During the course of summer camp, I got to see his personality and just about fell in love with it. But it seems like the closer we get, the more problems I have with him. He got a girlfriend that lives in Puerto Rico and she visited us at the gym. She was super cool and I liked her, but I noticed when she was around he got really red faced and barely talked. It seemed like he talked to me more than her (from what I’ve seen). By the end of her visit he denied liking her and realized she was a lot older than him (never heard him talk about her again). So I’m assuming they aren’t together but before he was all about her. Then one day after class we were all giving each other hugs and when I got to him he just shook my hand and hugged the person behind me. -_- Of course I tried to be all mad and ignore him, but it didn’t work because he asked me if I was ok and I sat next to him and we started taking about random things and his leg injury. Now, to this day, he has a record of lightly hitting and punching me, lightly hitting me on the head with random things, pushing me off a couch, making weird and loud noises around me, dancing around me, showing me some Vines, asking me if I’m ok when I look serious, looking at me (sometimes he stares and when we lock eyes, he doesn’t look away), and making me go play games with him and the kids everyday for the kids aftercare program. At this point I might tell him how I feel or ask him how he feels about me because I see him almost everyday, BUT I can’t. Not because I’m scared, but because we’re now coworkers and I see him almost everyday, he’s really close friends with all the other coaches while I have decent relationships with them,
I only see him during bjj related events, and he’s 19 and I’m 16. So I’m waiting, but I guess my question is, What does all this mean? I’m sorry for writing so much but I’ve been confused all year. My main confusion is he touches me, threatens to beat me up, and fake punches me all the time (it’s all out of humor because I do it back), looks at me, and never goes a day without some type of interaction, but at the same time, he’s sometimes an asshole and seems like he doesn’t care about me because we never have serious conversations about anything other than bjj while he talks to the guys all the time. Also, he’s blond haired, blue eyed, and super good looking while I’m a tomboy (more personality wise) with average looks. My friends all say different things but I can never draw my own conclusion. Please help!

Reply December 7, 2013, 11:15 pm

Helping Hand

Hey I had the same sich. All u have to do is be a little weird when u r texting like me for example:
Me: OMG who do u have a crush on?!?

Him: (he tells you my guy told me he liked me) Who is your crush?

Me: Brayten and You

Saying another guys name also makes him jealous (the guy u r talking to) so it’s easy and simple and worry free just be you but weird I’m always weird so it’s easy for me lol

Reply December 8, 2013, 1:17 am

Amanda Wayne

I’m a high school senior who recently transferred to a new school. There’s this guy in my class who I recently developed feelings for. We’ve known each other for about three months now and we’ve been texting/chatting everyday for two months now. We use to text each other paragraphs, but now its a few lines. He’s a nice guy who gets along with everyone. But he confuses me. I really like him, i can’t tell if he feels the same way. I don’t want to tell him because I haven’t picked up clear hints. I dislike feeling vulnerable and putting my heart out on the line. Ive been hurt before.
He’s never complimented my physical appearance but he has called me extremely smart, modest etc. Im not completely sure if he treats me differently but he does tend to get a little awkward around me sometimes. When something is wrong with me, even though i don’t make it apparent, he always asks if I’m okay. I asked him once how he knew, he said he watched my body language. I always assumed that he occasionally looks at me in class, but i was never really sure.When i do catch him looking at me, we have this mini stare down, where we both squint until someone blinks.
Here are a few things he’s done before: 1- He always asks me if I’m okay. 2- We have a lot of things in common and he always points that out. 3-He nicknamed me. 4-I didn’t reply to his text, so he facebook messaged me. 5-When he’s around me, I can tell he’s looking in my direction, but i can never clearly tell if he’s looking at me.

Reply November 19, 2013, 7:40 pm

confusedaboutthisguy

A guy at work flirts with me and shows all signs that he likes me..teases me a lot, makes me laugh all the time, enquires whether I like something or not, talks to me all the time, sits next to me, puts his hand on my shoulder, keeps looking at my face, touches me on my arm or back etc. I like him too and flirt back with him. We are always laughing whenever together. I think he knows that I like him too. The only catch is we work in different cities and meet only during team meetings. I met him 4 times last 3months. He remembers everything about me and refers to our previous conversations. He told me on his own that he is a divorcee and has a child. He said he likes my sense of humour and jokingly enquired whether I have a boy friend. In our last meeting he took my phone no and texted me something funny about other guy who is in the same room. This was two weeks ago and I thought he would keep in contact this time and pursue me. But I didn’t hear from him. Exactly at the end of two weeks he sent me an invite to connect on a professional network! I thought it was such a lame move or is he telling me that this is only professional connection! I am the only woman in a large team so I don’t get to observe whether he flirts the same way with other women. Or is he hesitating because I am a coworker! .He has all the qualities that I am looking for in a man and would love if this progresses into something more. But I am hanging back and playing it cool to see whether he would make an attempt to contact me. What do you guys think of this situation? Hopeful or should I write off?

Reply October 23, 2013, 8:06 pm

Vanessa

I have a guy-friend who i have like for a while now, but i dont know if he like me back… We usually hang out in a group of all female (excluding him) but we are all friends with eachother. We have inside jokes, but we’ve known eachother since preschool and hes really close with a couple other girls in the group too… do you have any advice?

Reply October 23, 2013, 6:55 pm

Cara

So there’s this guy that I really like. He goes to my church, and most of our youth acitvities. He jokes around with me a lot, and hes really nice. And he is only like 3 months older than me. He says he likes my friend (not giving names) but she doesn’t like him back. He is also homeschooled and I don’t get to see him much. Please help I really really like! Hes like perfect for me but I’m not sure about him! I’m too young to date too. Plz help thanx!!!

Reply October 12, 2013, 12:15 pm

Julia

I’m so confused. I met this guy through a mutual friend and I before I left for school he texted me and wanted to go out unfortunately it was too hectic and I didn’t have time to go out with him. He still texts me everyday while I’m at school and he is always the one to start the conversation. One day he told me “I’m so glad I started talking to you you’re awesome” and my friends told me that at that point I was friend-zoned. But I am unsure, I am pretty sure he’s into me and we talk all day long about anything and everything. Is he just looking for a friendship? What do you think is going on?

Reply September 6, 2013, 3:29 pm

Paige

Eric:
I like this guy a lot and I’m pretty convinced he like me. I met him at a camp and he was one of the counselors. At camp he’d be always doing these things that made me feel out of this world. (I later learned by help from my friends he was flirting. XD) some of the things he did were hug me, complement me on my hair,wrote the hair out of my eyes, tell me I had pretty eyes, hold me by my waist, HE really wanted to slow dance with me, and much more that I can’t remember. (Sorry this camp was months ago.) Everyone I’ve asked have said that he likes me but the thing is theres a twist… We are six years apart; I’m 13 he 19. So a little while after the camp I saw him at warped tour and everyone he saw me he would give me a big hug. (: I’m probably insane, but I am truly convinced that he likes me…but I’m scared to ruin our friendship. Please help! Thanks. <333

Reply August 23, 2013, 12:14 am

Paige

We also have some very intense eye contact going XD

Reply August 23, 2013, 12:20 am

heythere

Hi Paige. It sounds like he likes you, but the age difference is important. I’m also a teenage girl, and yes, its exciting when a slightly older guys shows interest in you. But you have to keep in mind, that he may have eh he hem “dishonorable intentions”. He is older and might want you in the wrong way. Its important to choose a guy closer to you age who will respect you and your comfort zone. I’m 16and I am a completely different person than when I was 13. I guess what I’m saying is to wait it out and find a guy who can change and grow with you. He’s 19, he’s already lived through most of his teenage years. He may be great, but he’s been there already. You could make incredible memories and a better future with someone who you can be a teenager with. I don’t want to be all momish and annoying lol, but just be careful! I would do anything to be 13 again, so choose who you spend your time with carefully!

Reply August 27, 2013, 2:42 am

Kristy

Strap yourselves in, this is very long………. But I desperately want some advice… Please Help!!

I have been married for 5 year (together for 8) with 2 small children. I recently found out my husband has cheated on me – again!! A year ago I started getting my car serviced at a new place, the owner immediately caught my attention. Everytime I go in there he is always really nice, smile, etc. Most times he offers to give me a lift somewhere (even home, which is 6kms away) it is in my car, but still. In the car he talks about a lot of personal things with me – like his relationship with his fiance and the fact they have nothing in common, things that I don’t really need to know, he glances across at me whilst hes driving and always smiles at me. I asked him how old he was and discovered that we are both Aquarians born in the same year. When I call to book my car in for a service he knows its me by my voice.. He always appeared to be flirting with me and made sure he was available when I picked up my vehicle. His partner was the office lady and she was always there so I don’t know if he was flirting or if thats just him.

Anyway I went in there thursday night to pick up my car, I rang earlier in the day and said I couldnt get there by 5:30 he told me the other mechanic would be there until 7pm working on his own car. When I got there he walked out. He seemed happy to see me, he gave me the price but said he couldn’t give me an invoice because he was training a new office lady, he then went on to tell me about him and his partner having dramas and after 12 years, she wanted a break. He told me how upset he had been so I told him about what had happened with my husband we spoke for at least 5-10 minutes before someone pulled up out the front. So I left in a hurry and said “well if you ever want to go out, give me a call” he smiled at me and I said “I’m serious” then left. He said “no worries” and I left.

After I left I realised I had a new number he didn’t have, so I sent an email to the business saying if you ever need to contact me for anything heres my number. He pretty much immediately sent a text to my phone asking how the car was. One thing led to another he told me he loved my bluntness and it got him going and we should catch up soon, I suggested the Friday night. He said yes but have to go out with his sister first. We agreed to meet later in the night at a particluar suburb, but not where. his last text was “nite, sweet dreams”.

Then on Friday didn’t here anything at all. At 9pm I sent a an sms saying where I was. Didn’t here back until 11:50pm he said “I’m on my way baby xxx”. Then at 2am he still hadn’t shown up I sent a couple of messages saying “are you still coming? If not i’m outa here”. Got nothing so I sent another one “we are in the car are you still coming” Got a msg back about half hour later saying “just dropping my sister at her house”… So I said “So am I going home?” He said about 15 minutes later ” sorry I can’t make it in bed at my sisters place”. I didn’t reply. The next day I heard nothing so I sent an early evening text saying “sorry for the drunk texting, I was sporting a massive hangover all day, lol”. He said “No that’s fine I had a bit of an upset night just 1 of them things”. I said “I hope you’re okay and our conversations haven’t made things more complicated for you?” He said “No just a lot going on can’t seem to get my head right”. I said “I’m in a similar situation, things can change so quickly.. I’m staying at a gf’s tonight to much awkwardness at home. If you ever need to chat we can compare stories x”. He said “Thanks I will keep that in mind”.

I can’t stop thinking about him and I’m really annoyed he was so keen and then gave me nothing?? If he had never shown interest I wouldn’t feel this way. Should I have not sent him the texts?

I have the car booked in again for Thursday, but the conversation got really off topic and I don’t know if it was booked. Should I send a text confirming the booking? Or cancel the booking, give him some space and let him chase me?

Reply June 24, 2013, 1:45 am

Mai Mai

No. Just… No. Please learn English.

Reply May 9, 2013, 9:41 am

Mercedes

Omg Eric Charles. I f****** love you. =D

Reply March 20, 2013, 11:21 am

Eric Charles

Haha, I love you too. ;)

Reply March 30, 2013, 1:40 pm

Mercedes

Here’s my question. I was dating a guy a couple months and knew him almost 2 yrs. he was leery about having me around his daughter n always made it clear n then after awhile he kept bringing up his hair dresser who’s allowed to be around his daughter n he was asking her n her son ( who is his daughters age) to train at his dojo n so on… They have all this stuff in common n it freaked me out n I told him I just wanted to be friends… Well I realized I was wrong n he asked why I bailed n I sort of told him just not all the details. So we have been talk g for a year n just recently starting hooking up again but now im not sure what to do because while I’ve met his friends I spend time w him outside the bedroom He doesn’t ask me on dates like he did before. I told him I wanted another chance to date n he said he wasn’t rushing into anything which duh but I’m still wondering what can I do to turn him around so we can actually go on a date or if he even likes me more than fwb

Reply September 6, 2015, 3:08 pm

JAZZ

heyy!
so theres dis guy i like and he is always around me ! he is my best friend and i reallyyyyy
like him .. so ive seen these signs
1. he blushes hard when he is talking to me
2. he can chat wid me from abt a minute till a week continuosly nd ofcourse once we did chat for 2 days no break (except sleep) :P
3. he takes my problems just as his own and helps me really well…
4. he in a friendly manner makes kisses and i reply him with one too!
5. we have written sometimes iloveyou to each other in a friendly manner again
6. and almost 30 ppl ( my friends and acquaintances asked me how long ive been wid him to wich i have replied we r frnds )
7. my friends link me wid him and he always blushes
8. i never wave him but he comes and greets me
9. few days bak i did nt msg him for a day so he msged ” forgot me so soon ”
10. he shares everthing wid me
11. he often fyts wid me in a joking manner like eg. huh is my word no its my word etc etc only on group chats
12.but on personal chats he cracks jokes…makes jokes on his own and makes me laugh
13. he finds ways he can talk to me or see me … like i was standing in the corridor and his class was across mine but he came looked at me smiled and came to me shook hands nd went back .

pleaseeeee helpppp…i have nooo idea!! does he like me ????????????!!!!!

Reply March 6, 2013, 12:21 pm

Lily

Obviously! Go ask him out!

Reply October 31, 2013, 11:25 pm

Andie

PLZ HELP

k so I like this guy.a lot. He’s a friend of mine and I have one class with him and we talk a lot and he’s so funny. I also talk to him in the hall, and after school, since we are very alike and do a lot of the same sports and activities. He might like me because…
He stares at me(when I look back he usually either freaks out and looks away, or smiles and looks away)
He compliments me
He took up a whole page to sign my yearbook with inside jokes
He nicknames me
He high fives me
He randomly appears wherever I am
He slouches and acts comfy when I talk to him
He laughs at my jokes
He agrees with a lot I say
And we just never run out of thing to talk about.
The thing is today he told me about this other girl his friends were trying to get him to hook up with (date) but he said no last minute and called her a slut and told me EVERYTHING. Well, does he just see me as one of the boys? He is an outgoing guy in general, but when were together, things just feel different. I don’t want to doubt it’s there, but after today I feel kinda friend zoned because he tells me about other girls… :'(
He’s honestly just a great guy, but I have no idea how he feels. Aarrrrggg guys need to show their feelings more.
Thoughts? advice? Anything? Ppppplllllllzzzzz?

Reply February 28, 2013, 4:47 pm

shelby

ok so ive liked this guy sense july and we have became really good friends…..we talk everyday he comes to the band room before and after school (thats where im at then) and we take time to see each other in between classes……he is always making me laugh and is really sweet to me…..we skype all the time…..and our convos normally last around 3 or 4 hours or more………..so do you think he likes me

Reply January 23, 2013, 11:18 pm

Madeline

Do you think he like me?
I met this guy last week (I know, I’m crazy). I’ve never been so infatuated with a man.
I’m clueless as to whether or not he likes me. This is my last resort.

He loves (likes) me not
1) his responses are often shorter than mine
2) a lot of times he doesn’t ask a question in return to one I’ve asked

He loves (likes) me
1) he’s an introvert by admission, but he talks a lot to me
2) he revealed something very deep in his heart to me
3) whenever I had to leave, he gave me a very warm hug
4) he said I was very smart
5) often after I’d say something, he’d compliment how well said it was
6) we have almost everything in common

Reply January 7, 2013, 8:30 pm

Anonomous

Well There is this guy I have been in love with forever and he ound out by the people around us. And I always always find him staring at me but never says a thing. I don’t know what to do ?!?! I mean like does he like me or does he not?!?! It’s really confusing!

Reply November 29, 2012, 6:33 pm

Helping Hand

Hey just start a convo or bump into him (literally from behind and look away so it looks like it’s an accident) and then say oops and all and then start a convo and look for signs if he messes with his hair a lot or his shirt,shorts,looks down ect. It means he is nervousness wish is a MAJORETTE sign ppl need to look for right away then look for signs that say he likes you then find out how close you guys are by staying in touch and all then when the time is right be weird and start a convo like this.

Me: OMG who do u have a crush on?!?

Him: (he tells you my guy told me he liked me) Who is your crush?

Me: Brayten and You

Saying another guys name also makes him jealous (the guy u r talking to) so it’s easy and simple and worry free just be you but weird I’m always weird so it’s easy for me lol and when he is jealous his face gets red or his eyes get darker or lighter but watch his eyes and if they don’t change see if his face is red or he might grit his teeth or clench his fists

Reply December 8, 2013, 1:30 am

Person

Theres this guy, (no kidding) lol.
So he smiles lots and we text a few times a week. and when we see each other, mostly in passing we talk for a bit. He asked my advice about another girl. just saying “this girl” not mentioning any names or anything. Do you think he is interested in me or is this other girl actually who is is interested in. cos i read somewhere that sometimes they do this to find out what you think?

Reply November 1, 2012, 1:48 am

Something

I don’t think he likes you in that way.. Usually when guys ask you about another girl it means he isn’t interested~ best of luck!

Reply March 30, 2013, 6:26 pm

kei

I don’t think he does romantically. He just thinks you are a good person.

Reply October 31, 2012, 7:16 pm

Ashley

Hi, I need your help for this situation. So, this guy is my “best friend.” Or thats what he calls me. He made a cute nickname for me and is always smiling when we talk. He talks to his friends about me, and I know because I am his friend’s friend. Problem is, he is shy and would probably NEVER make a move. We used to talk for 7 hours everyday and when he didnt talk to me for one day, he apologizes and really feels sorry. Everytime my friends that are girls and I walk around and we see him, he always looks away because he is super shy. We don’t have any classes together this year, which is completely different from last year, we have one class together. I feel like we are growing apart from each other and since we dont have any classes together this year, he is forgetting about me. I feel like he does like me, but i can’t really tell. HELP please?

Reply October 25, 2012, 12:38 am

Allison

I have the same problem as you:( it’s funny because im his “bestfriend” too:( he told me he liked me, but he doesn’t really show it, he isn’t exactly shy soo, ya, but are you guys still texting alot? Because that helps a little. But just keep talking to him, and keep an eye out for any “signs” he may give off? But don’t stress over it:)

Reply December 28, 2012, 10:13 am

Emily

i am really confused on my situation with this guy. we live a small college dorm together and are pretty close friends, but didn’t know each other before we started school. he’s in an “open relationship” with a girl who goes to college a few states away. so he can hook up and date other people, but he often talks about how much he loves his “girlfriend”. HOWEVER, in the past 3-4 weeks he’s gone from just being an acquaintance, to trying to get me to hook up with him (while he was drunk), to actually kissing me and snuggling with me and flirting with me all the time. here’s what he does usually:
touch my face A LOT
stare at me all the time
tease me
make an effort to hold conversations with me almost every time he sees me
compliments me
laughs at my lame-ass jokes
takes care of me when I’m drunk
eves drops on my conversations
talks to me about everything and anything
treats me like a close friend/bro

also, a few night ago, I was a little drunk and playing with his football, he took it from me in a flirty way and when i was trying to get it back, one of our dorm-mates said (and I quote) :”dude, emily and jack are totally gonna hook up, look at them. I dare you guys to kiss right now.” and we both just kind of blushed and didn’t say anything. so, obviously other people notice and both my friends and his friends seem to hint at it.
I don’t necessarily want him to break up with his gf because they’ve been dating for a few years, but I also really want to be more than friends because we have a really awesome relationship!
HELP!
I am relying on your cyber advice to tell me what to do!

Reply October 20, 2012, 10:05 pm

Carrie

well, there is a boy i have known for ages, and i have always had a soft spot for him. he has always teased me, and recently has become more sexual towards me. He began sexting me a few months back, but then i found he did it to loads of other girls who all seemed to gang up on him and so i decided to stick up for him, however… since then he has spoken to me but he just seems weird. sometimes it is serious and other times, he askes to meet up and wonders what we could do when we would get there (he would ask for sexual favours basically) – but he teases me at school, and often i do catch him casually staring at me, and mocking me,… today for example i saw him leaving our class first with his friends and as soon as he walked out the door he look through the glass panel and he stared at me … when there were other pretty girls around. i just don’t know what to do, he is a popular kid at our school and im just merh – retarded. i’m really confused and i have no idea how to behave when im with him, on facebook and texting him i can just mock him without thinking about it and i know it makes him laugh, but when i see him at school i go red and my heart beats so fast. i can’t think when im near him and just resort to calling him an idiot or rolling my eyes if he gets to be a nuissance, which i don’t think he likes much. i have confidence issues, and if i was really confidence i feel like i might actually have a shot, what do you think?

Reply September 26, 2012, 5:01 pm

MJ

So I am in grad school for psychology and there are not many guys around, but there is one guy in particular in my program I can’t quite read or figure out. He was the TA for 2 of my classes and he is a year ahead of me in school, although he is actually 6 years older than me, but anyways. I have had so many interactions with him that baffle me that I don’t know where to start. But in general I usually see him at school or at school functions. My last name is Justice and I had a conversation with him once about my last name and how people always make a big deal about it bc we are in a forensic psychology program. From that point on he started calling me “Justice”. He will shout across the student lounge to say hi to me, he also calls me “kid” if he doesnt use my last name. He is a very friendly person and says hi to everyone, but he seems to make a big deal out of saying hi to me, at least I think so. Also when ever I talk to him he always shares a lot of personal information I didn’t ask for.

So today he decides to sit with my friend and I in the student lounge so he could eat his lunch. He sits down and says I just thought of a joke do you want to hear it, he says the joke and we cant figure out the punch line so he tell us, and it was bad, not like inappropriate but not funny. I laugh at him and tell him it was bad and he told me I should write down because its not bad but its awesome. He then offers me some of his food and then starts talking about all the things he knows how to cook. We also talked about how we both miss the fall because we are both from the east and now live in LA. Then he started talking about his ex girlfriend and how she wanted to move in with him after a month and how she was hard to deal with because she wouldn’t compromise on anything, which is why she is now an ex. He also mentioned that he was single and that single life is better than dating her. He also mentioned that that was 8 months ago when hey broke up. Mind you i have known him for a year and have been struggling with whether he likes me or not this whole time. We end up on the topic of kids because there are a lot of girls in our program and a lot of them are pregnant. We talked about how grad school would not be an ideal time for kids and what not. We end the conversation with him telling me that he doesnt like most of his classmates bc they all think they are the best when they arent and that he liked my class because we are moe laid back.

I am just trying to figure out if he likes me he picks on me and jokes around a lot with me while also telling me a t of personal info about himself. We both have an interesting sense of humor that i thin people usually find odd but I feel like we think a lot a like. There are a dozen other situations like this where I leave wondering if he likes me. But then again I think if he did he would have done something about it by now. Although I think there may have been a time when I missed him attempting to ask me out. After he was working with a group from my class he was a TA for we were talking and he was like I feel like doing something spontaneous and fun. And I was just kinda like of yeah and didnt say anything else. A friend of mine afterwards was like i think he was trying to get you to say yeah me to so he could ask you out on a date but once again I am not sure.

I then end some of my friends keep saying I should just ask him out or ask him if he wants to hang out to try and figure him out. I have kind of done this before, in high school I asked a guy to prom and he said no. But that was when I as a teenager asking out a teenager. Withe an actual man I dont know how to ask hm out or if I should, I have read a lot of articles saying that women shouldnt bc if they liked you they would make a move,and others that say you should and that guys like that. If I was confident in knowing that he liked me I would be more willing to do it. So my problem is figuring out if he likes me and if I should just ask him out. I am concerned because I do not want the next 3 years of school to be awkward if he says no or if it doesnt work out because I like talking to him and him calling me by my last name.

Reply September 26, 2012, 4:14 am

Boy Reliever

Look he is a weird guy (the good kind u want to hang on to) so do what I do to find out if my crush likes me for example:

Me:who is your crush

Him:you (he might say someone else or u and someone else but look in their eyes to see if they sparkle or suddenly change shade or see if they r blushing or playing with something) who is your crush?

Me:you and (say the name of a guy u had a crush on when you were in high school it’ll make him jealous if he likes you so he will either grit his teeth clinch his fists play with his hair or something he might suddenly look down and get a dark look on his face or in his eyes or see if his eyes suddenly change shade)

Reply December 8, 2013, 2:36 am

Isabelle

There is this guy, he’s a very close friend of mine and I’m totally in love with him. He’s been through a break-up a few months ago, because his girl wanted something real serious and he freaked out and decided he was young and needed to have his fun. So he’s “elected” this girl he tells me about, saying she’s his “short term” contract, and after he’s had his share of uncomitting relationships he could go for something more with someone else.
Ok, so we started being friends two weeks before he broke up, and we spent already at the time hours and hours talking at night over the internet. Than it became a habit, we’re always connected together, whether on the internet, or we see each other. He’s asked me to change from fbk tchat to messenger, he said because he thinks fbk is untrustworthy, but I’m the only one he talks to on messanger, and now he’s not over facebook more than twenty minutes a day. I know his ex used to harass him over facebook, too.
So, even when he’s miles away from me on holidays, he’ll text me, message me, tell me about everything and anything. He’s already “implied” I was his type and desirable, recently he’s said he’s lost, but did not tell about what. Then a few days ago, told me this big secret about one bad habit he has and is trying to cure, so he’s a bit edgy and distant with me, cause he’s the proud type and feels a bit ashamed now he’s told me.
He’s jealous of each and every man I talk about, saying he’s better, but if I start to get jealous when he tells me about this girl, he picks at me.
A few days after he broke up with his girlfriend, he was telling me he needed his fun, and live his young life, and realised through the conversation I was attracted to him ( at the time it was mere attraction).I had already had a crush on a friend of mine that wasn’t reciprocated, so as he was telling me about this girl, I thought it would kill our friendship as it did the other one I had. I was expecting some “I’m sorry, we’re just friends” and distance, but what he said was “there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you but I’m young and I need to know I’ve had my share of complicated and stupid things before I settle.” I was waiting for distance and awkwardness, I got to get even closer to him, to have him always needing me for everything and repeating me “a couple in the same class is hard too handle”. (we’ve got another year in he same class left).

So……………….. is the guy into me with feelings he denies or what??

Reply August 31, 2012, 4:27 am

Napralina

There’s a guy I met about a month ago. Here’s what he does:
Starts conversations
Makes jokes all the time
Talks about serious stuff like his parents divorce but also stuff like baby carrots
Makes eye contact
Stares at me but when I glance up doesn’t look away
Says my name a lot when we talk
Smiles a lot
He is a friendly person to everyone…. Does he like me?

Reply August 27, 2012, 5:18 pm

Flora

THAT’S THE MOST EASIST ANSWER IN THE WORLD. YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Reply August 28, 2012, 1:34 am

Taelyn

ok so im totally confuzed!!!! theres this guy i really like… but i dated him a year ago for a round 4 months. he always screams my name down the hallway at school, and he always gives me high fives. and in class he always sits next to me and like shows me his new shoes or is just acting funny! he also is really cute, he has blone hair and blue eyes. And he plays football!!! :) lol but i dont know if he likes me or not….please help me!!!!!!!

Reply July 27, 2012, 8:48 am

BOY RELIEVER

Dude seriously HE DOES its obviouse

Reply December 8, 2013, 2:16 am

Mireka-chan96

Hi!I’ve been reading your article a while ago and this question keeps bugging me..A year ago,there’s this guy in my class who’s 20 cm taller than me that always make me annoyed sometimes..I don’t know why he doesn’t do anything to me but I still feel annoyed..one day,during the first term exam,one of my boy classmates named F (I don’t want to mention he’s name here) wanted to change seat with me..knowing him,I know he only wanted to change with me so he can cheat on the exam..at that time,I’m a really,really,really shy girl and I don’t talk much in school..unluckily my usual seat is surrounded by my boy classmates so without thinking,I agree because I don’t want to stuck sitting around boys for 3 days..I won’t survive that long..and since F’s seat is at the back of my bestfriend’s ..and the next day,I happily sit on F’s seat knowing that I will be sitting behhind my bestfriend..Wee!!I’m soo happy..but at the same time,I have make a big mistake..you see,the guy I don’t like is sitting behind me and I didn’t noticed!!I was surprised!!
During the 10 minutes before the first paper exam starts,he lean behind me and whisper’Eizza,you give the answers to me,okay~’.I was surprised at that time because at that time,I know he is a SMART guy and well-known for his mathematic solving problem brain since he always get an a+ in the exam..he wanted ME!a typical absent-minded girl to give him the answers..I was very displeased..then one of my girl classmates said that he’s doing that must mean that he likes me..’LIKES ME?! PFFT’ I can’t believe my ears..5 minutes before the exam starts,I heard a screeching noise behind me and I can’t believe my eyes..he’s pushing his table closer to mine and I don’t have enough space for me to get out..I said to him to move his table a little away for me and he responded”Why should I~” with his flirty smile..I was in rage at that time..during the exam,he always kicks my chair repeatedly and sometimes he often spread he’s legs around me..I FELT MY HEART BEATING FAST WITHOUT KNOWING WHY..Three days before the exam eneded,my friend who’s sitting a few seats away from me asked him this question ‘What does she mean to you?’ I was curious too of what he will answer to that and then he answered’ She’s my GF’. the classroom at that time gone wild and me?Me?I blushed so hard to his answer and I think he is looking at me at that time..and that is when I started liking him..
That’s not the first time it happened..It happened again in my birthday..
At first the classroom were full with happy birtday songs and I was very happy since I never felt this before and I noticed he didn’t even sing that song..I was pissed and then I told myself’Why should I get pissed with him’ then it all happened..you see.. one of my classmates started to shout to vote for that’person’ in a AF..I don’t know why they did that in my birthday..after my recess time,I noticed him behind me,writing something at the ice-cream board..I ignored it at first but when the japanese class started..I over heard my classmates in front said he is being obvious writing ‘that’ at the ice-cream board..I was puzzled and soo I turned back..I was very,very surprised when I saw him writing ‘Eizza <3'..I tried to erased it but he wrote it with permanent marker and so one of my friends said that she will keep that paper in the mean time..I glared at him and saw him smirking at me..I blushed..
Actually there's tons of things he did that made me puzzled like when I didn't come in school for a week,he asked my friend,E of where is my whereabout..when we're alone,he poke me with his paper and many other things..
But when we reach the next grade(this year) we're in separated class..he didn't spoke to me,he didn't tease me like he always do..he didn't look at me..does that mean he began to hate me or….
I don't want to have these thoughts but since it's driving me nuts..I can't keep thinking about it..I love him but I don't know if these feelings will reach him someday..
I wanted to talk to him but I'm to scared to opened up my mouth..
What should I do?What can I do?Please reply back..

Reply July 25, 2012, 6:12 am

Andie

K well, he def used to like u…but idk if he does now, since people change and u haven’t gotten a chance to talk YET. but don’t worry, there’s still hope! Just find an excuse to talk to him and his friends too if u can. I know it’s hard but ur never going to get anywhere if you don’t talk to him. Good luck Hun!

Source: experience :)

Reply February 28, 2013, 4:27 pm

Mireka-chan96

Hi!I’ve been reading your article a while ago and this question keeps bugging me..A year ago,there’s this guy in my class who’s 20 cm taller than me that always make me annoyed sometimes..I don’t know why he doesn’t do anything to me but I still feel annoyed..one day,during the first term exam,one of my boy classmates named F (I don’t want to mention he’s name here) wanted to change seat with me..knowing him,I know he only wanted to change with me so he can cheat on the exam..at that time,I’m a really,really,really shy girl and I don’t talk much in school..unluckily my usual seat is surrounded by my boy classmates so without thinking,I agree because I don’t want to stuck sitting around boys for 3 days..I won’t survive that long..and since F’s seat is at the back of my bestfriend’s ..and the next day,I happily sit on F’s seat knowing that I will be sitting behhind my bestfriend..Wee!!I’m soo happy..but at the same time,I have make a big mistake..you see,the guy I don’t like is sitting behind me and I didn’t noticed!!I was surprised!!
During the 10 minutes before the first paper exam starts,he lean behind me and whisper’Eizza,you give the answers to me,okay~’.I was surprised at that time because at that time,I know he is a SMART guy and well-known for his mathematic solving problem brain since he always get an a+ in the exam..he wanted ME!a typical absent-minded girl to give him the answers..I was very displeased..then one of my girl classmates said that he’s doing that must mean that he likes me..’LIKES ME?! PFFT’ I can’t believe my ears..5 minutes before the exam starts,I heard a screeching noise behind me and I can’t believe my eyes..he’s pushing his table closer to mine and I don’t have enough space for me to get out..I

Reply July 25, 2012, 5:45 am

Chiara van rensburg

There’s this guy,he’s about 4 or 5 years older than what I am! We haven’t reali had a “one on one” conversation before due to him being friendz with basically every1! I added him on f.book and somehow he didn’t accpt me but accepts every1 else! He doesn’t talk to me but like I say,he talks with everybody else! We wouldn’t rli be near each other but we do make eye contact but then it seems like he flirts with other girls but not neccesarily in front of me so I don’t really notice it! I added him on bbm and we haven’t really spoken as for him not really showin some signs of wantin to speak to me coz our conversations die after that! People say that he’s avoidin me coz he likes me but I’m not so sure! Help please!

Reply July 13, 2012, 9:33 am

Anshi

Hi
i’m actually going mad about a guy of 22 years old. Well i go to college and he works.
I knew him since very long but its strange that i didnt get a crush on him.
3 weeks ago i participated in a competition and he was the one to drive my friends and I to our destination. When he looked int0 the mirror in the van, i looked into his eyes directly and since that time i just cant forget him..I’ve started having a crush on him..There is not even one day i haven’t dream about him..I’m so lost in him..
I get to see him everyday.But i actually dont like the way he looks at me..
How will i know if he likes me or not??
{sorry its a bit like an essay ;) }
any help plz???

Reply June 20, 2012, 8:59 am

anon.

Please answer this, I’m doing my head in thinking about it. So there’s this one guy I really like and people think he might like me as well. One time a friend flicked gum at me and it got stuck in my hair (ew, I know) and the guy I like spent fifteen minutes with his fingers threaded through my hair picking it all out. He also spends a lot of time talking to me when he’s normally quite shy around me. He laughs at all my rubbish jokes and he teases me too. One time another guy was threateneing to push me into the water and the guy I like picked him up, waded out to the water and held him an inch above the water before dropping him off on dry land again. Please… I could really do with an opinion from a guy or indeed anyone. I can’t stop thinking about him.

Reply June 14, 2012, 4:20 pm

Sydney

Alright so my friends and many other people tell me he likes me and this is what he does around me.
-cares about me
-makes me feel special
-sticks up for me
-asks my friends if I am ok when im sad
-starts conversation with me all the time
-talks to me whenever he gets the chance
-acts stupid around me
-pokes me (Poke wars)
-talks to me 24/7 on FB
-video chats with me whenever he can
-and 22 people (yes my friend counted!) think we are dating or should be a couple!

So do you think that he is into me or is this average?

Reply June 9, 2012, 6:11 pm

Nina

Lol, Sydney

I’m no relationship guru, but judging from you wrote I’d say: OH YEA BABY HE DEFINITELY LIKES YOU. Now reciprocate if you like him to ;). If not, go easy on him.

Reply June 25, 2012, 6:53 pm

kk8

theres this guy at my school, i didnt know him, but he somehow knew me… he’d like randomly called my name in the hall once, and i thot that wuz pretty creepy, but apparently one of his friends is in one of my classes, and thats how he knows me… and everytime i see him, no matter at the bus stop, hallway or class, he would call “Hi (my name). now sometimes we hav a class together, so me and him had gotten a bit closer, now he likes to pop up behind me, grab me by the shoulders, and scare me haha ..and a few days ago when i went to social class after school to ask teacher something he was abt to leave the class, but he waited for me, walked me to my locker, where i said “bye” cuz he had to go to his locker and to his gf…but he told me “naaww, i don’t need to leave yet, and my gf may come this way…” and stood there talking to me while i got my books into my backpack. after that i closed my locker, i started to walk away, assuming he was gonna stay there to wait for his gf, but he followed me, and walked me downstairs, in which we continued our conversation… he speaks a language i didn’t know soo i wuz laughing at him, and i told him my parents knew the language, and hes like yea id go like talk to them and be like im your daughers friend, and im awesome and such, and im gonna marry her in the future… i told him “yea rite i hardly know u…” and hes like “r u sure?” this guy, i never really had feelings for before but im starting to like him, but im not sure if he feels the same way…since he has a gf?

Reply June 9, 2012, 12:06 am

Sabby

SO THERES THIS GUY THAT WORKS AT THE LOCAL WALGREENS HES A CASHIER AND LATELY IVE BEEN WANTING TO GET HIS NUMBER BECAUSE I FEEL SO ATTRACTED TO HIM. AND I HOPE HE FEELS THE SAME BUT I DONT KNOW IF HES BEING NICE OR IS FLIRTING WITH ME BECAUSE SO FAR HE TEASES AND JOKES WITH ME, HE ASKES ME QUESTIONS ABOUT SCHOOL AND STUFF, AND NOW HE GIVES ME DISCOUNTS AND AS WELL ILL ASK HIM FOR SOMETHING AND HE’LL GO LOOKING FOR IT WITHOUT ME ASKING HIM FOR HIM TO DO THAT, AND ALSO HE MAKES ME LAUGH HE ALWAYS TALKS TO ME WHEN HE SEEMS ME.. IS HE INTO ME? OR HOW CAN I ASK FOR HIS NUMBER??

Reply June 6, 2012, 4:01 pm

Andie

Ask for the store’s number then wink

Reply February 28, 2013, 4:31 pm

Lona

First thing you gotta do is to stop shouting and remove the caps lock.

Reply March 11, 2013, 4:05 pm

Confused Kat

So I just met this guy this year and he is in one of my classes. He pokes me in the side and says the sounds that I make are cute. He also pokes other girls. He texts me everyday and we joked that we are ‘married’. Our friend keeps saying that we should just go out already. We’re pretty close but I don’t know if he does. He’s told me a secret about himself. It would really help if you could give me advice

Reply May 27, 2012, 11:12 pm

anonymous

ok theres is a guy which you slready know. he started as friends with my cousin in school and stopss hanging out with his friends in the morning to hang with us. recently when we walk he is by me. my cousin says he like me but im not sure. twice we were walking and talking kinda ahead of my cousin when she randomly disapeared or turned around. we kept walking and saw her. she just walked past us. we both wondered why so i continued my way. he said he would walk with me cuz it would be awkward having 2 guys and a girl walking together. my cousins reason is it was his excuse. just today i didnt technicly admit i liked him to my cousin but she started going all freak. she said she was going to his class which so happened to have its door opened. when she went in i didnt go or watch feeling wierd. she came back out and said she told him i liked him and he said he liked me. i cant really believe her and i didnt watch her say it or hear him say it. now im kinda freaked for monday if she was telling the truth. the guy i like now walks with me even if my cousin isnt there and when he leaves we say bye and stuff. he is cute and funny and can make me laugh. surprisingly we had a nice chat about batman (Because batman is awesome :)) i dont know if he really does llike me and its driving me crazy

Reply April 27, 2012, 6:19 pm

anonymous

to add on today he walked with us and started off with “how r u?” and victoria told him but i said nothing. he smiled at her and turned towards me and asked again. later on my cousin said she felt awkward walking with us cuz she said we kept talking to eachother and barely talked to her and is saying we are perfect. i like this guy so much since he, as i mentioned, is funny. we talked about everything from being tired to all the singers we hate (ADELE)

Reply May 4, 2012, 6:12 pm

I want more

I broke up with my ex two years ago. Since then, I have tried to go no contact multiple times. All times, he says he wants to stay friends and keep talking. He gets upset when I won’t talk to him. I get so confused by his behavior! Recently, I told him I can’t talk to him and this time he’s listening for the most part. I told him I can’t be friends with him because he calls/texts everyday, says good morning and goodnight, took me to his family’s house for a holiday, when his dad came to town he asked if I wanted to go get dinner with them, has gone on dates but has not officially had a girlfriend in the two years since we’ve been broken up, wants to watch movies at night, we don’t have sex except for once MAYBE every 6 months when we have a slip up, when my phone somehow blocked him, he asked a mutual friend if they’d heard from me and was worried about me, etc. etc. He sees nothing wrong with this and thinks it’s us being friends. I got upset because I found out he went on a date with someone multiple times and told him he should have told me so I could step out of the way, he got mad and said there was no reason to tell me as we’re not there in our relationship. So now, we haven’t talked for a week, well he text one day twice but I ignored both times, and then the next two days he pocket dialed me which he has never done before, I didn’t answer either time. People say to watch people’s actions and not their words, I have been, and now I’m sad but I know I wnat more and I won’t settle for less at this point. 2 years is a long time to wait for someone. We initially broke up because I was really hesitant about making things “official” so when we had a fight, I was quick to break it off. I realize that, but now I feel like he’s still making me pay for it. When we talked he told me he was fighting something and was scared to say it… but wouldn’t tell me what. What the heck do I do? Just continue with this? That’s my plan.. I just want more.

Reply April 24, 2012, 9:04 pm

amy

I really enjoyed reading what you wrote.if i were in your shoes i would probably continue to like him and see were it heads no matter how long.the second option would be to find a boyfriend and see how he reacts.try to get him jealus.then theres the last option which should be your last.tell him you just cant be with him anymore and cut all ties.i hope you think long and hard about this decision because it could affect you for your entire life

Reply April 24, 2012, 10:48 pm

Hairi

Eric:
Hey so I’m just asking for some simple advice. I’m 15 and I’m very confused with this guy and myself. I noticed this boy who my friends knew at the beginning of high school, he’s a year older than me so we’re never in any classes together. For some reason I’ve been noticing him, but we don’t ever talk! Once in a blue moon we’d speak when he’s standing with one of my friends. My friends always told me that he’s looked at me and turn away smiling. They said he’d change his body language when he noticed me, and how he always glances at me. I’ve been noticing him looking at me too. But I find whenever we meet eye to eye we both look away quickly. I’d asked my friends that if he did like me, why doesn’t he do something about it? They told me it’s because he’s shy and he acted the same way with his last girlfriend when he liked her. Sometimes I think he’d smile at me but I’d look away stupidly not sure if it was at me. I realize that I really like him. But I have NO idea why. I think he’s super nice and he’s very smart. But I don’t know what I see in him. I’ve tried to ignore him but everyday I find myself looking for him. What should I do? Does he have a thing? Is that why I keep holding back?

Reply April 24, 2012, 8:36 pm

Lolala

Lol not a real good advisor but how about you try talking to him? i know we all have ego issues and stuff but try it If you want a relationship cause he obviously likes you. or just go and kiss him? :p

Reply January 4, 2013, 6:59 am

Crystal

I’m in High School, and I am very confused. There is this guy in my class that has been joking around with me and has been doing all these crazy things. I have never been in love, and I didn’t see the signs he was putting off. I didn’t have feelings for him, so I thought. It’s been awhile sense he’s done anything to annoy me. He started calling me mean names. He’s been hanging with one of my friends. I didn’t really care, until he started sitting by her at lunch. One day he got up and looked for her. My heart felt like it was damaged. I had never felt that before. It felt like some one just hurt me, I guess. It was very undiscribable. Anyway, I started asking my cousin for help and she told me he really liked me and that I should talk to him. I was so nervous to talk to him, but I faced my fear. I talked to him. Well really just stumbled on words. My mind went blank. I felt like a fool. I tried talking to him again, to tell him how i really felt about him. I just don’t know what to do. Please help.

Reply April 23, 2012, 12:06 am

babykay

i have a question when a guy keeps asking u if u like him and u keep saying no but i really do think he is hot but does tht mean when he keeps asking me if i like does it mean he likes me or am i overreacting because he kinda is nice to me and he does tease me and talk to in my art class and he keeps saying that i think his hot and i tell him no i just dont want him not liking me and i like him i am fat so tht makes a differentence to so thts y i want to knw.

Reply April 20, 2012, 10:40 am

babykay

also i have heard when guys tease u they like u

Reply April 20, 2012, 10:41 am

JASMINE

ok. its this guy i like we live next to each other, go to same school, we are the only 2 at the bus stop for my area. i gave him on valentines day, said from a secreat admirer, he smiled and ask it was it me, i said yeah he rubbed me on my back and thats was the end of it,
then one da i got my cousin to take him a note from me and i didnt get no reponse.
i ask him one day was he ever scared to say some to someone but you got scared,he said yes
so that got me thinkling he just scare to approach me about it
he smiles at me
stares inmy eyes from time to time and we have a lot of things in common
we never run out of things to talk about
hes in 9 grade im in 10
im a little on the thick side and black
he skinny and white
so that scares me that he might like me but scared what people are gonna say

GIVE ME ADVICE PLZ IM DESPRATE

Reply April 16, 2012, 11:11 pm

meg

i had a huge crash on a guy in my year but we don have any class together. my friends went to him to let him know that im interested in him and he thinks it as i like him (though it’s true). i started to text him but not a lot cuz im worried he would find me annoying. then one day he started texting me first for asking my msn, after that we chat on msn till now. we didn’t chat many times, but every time we talks for hours. even when he’s very tired he still says he want to talk to me. when i tell him to sleep, he would ask “you sure?” “you want me to sleep?” of course i dont, but i reply”if you want to” then he went to sleep. im thinking if he actually wants me to say “no” or im just overreacting?
At school, we rarely meet, and he doesn’t look at me when he actually can see me. last time we went on family meal, everyone sit in the same table, he chose to sit far away from me and talking to other people except me. is he being shy cause he likes me too or just feeling awkward seeing me?

Reply April 6, 2012, 3:06 am

Caitlyn

There’s a guy that’s in many of my classes. I really like him and when I’m around him I usually blush and laugh a lot and he notices. My friend has been trying to set us up (she very much doesn’t take no for an answer) and they talk about me a lot. Although he acts interested to her, when I’m around he doesn’t talk to me. I catch him looking a lot, though. Anyways, I just need some help catching his eye, he knows I like him and just need help getting him a little more interested. I would love it if you would help me, thanks!

Reply April 2, 2012, 7:31 pm

maria

hey . So there’s this guy i really like and ihave him in a class . But iwanna know if he like’s me. He play’s around with me like poke’s me everytime he see’s me in the hallway’s. And in class he playy’s with me like fightinq with me but he just playing around and stuff. He hold’s my hand’s during he fight’s with me . And try’s to hug me too. I sit infront of him . And he sit’s behind me and he bother’s me alot . He poke’s me alot . And when i put my head down to sleep he try’s many way’s to wake me up. And he only does this to me .. Does this mean he like’s me to or no.. /:

Reply March 31, 2012, 11:15 am

lory

hey, im going crazy for a guy at work. hes 7 yrs younger than me. i cant stand him cause im married hes single. were endin up every shift togheter and hes divin me nuts.. im trying to hate him cause idont wanna fall. and i dont know his felings for me. when he with me always tries to bump his leg into mine. he told me if i m single he d go out with me bu thats ll he ever sad except he complimented my hair myy shoes my skirt. i drive him home but notin hapens.. hes trying to stay out of my marriage but im not happy with my hubby [long famlystory]. pls help. where this situation can end?

Reply March 19, 2012, 10:55 pm

ugggg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ugggg im 12 turning 13 soon there is this guy in my class i still like him which ive like him since 5th grade now i am in 7th grade and so is he and i think he is so hot he is blonde with blue eyes and i dont know if he likes me or not he stares at me alot and i dont know if I shud ask him but the last time i tried he said no and i told one of his best friends that he probaly wont date me because he is not ready and when his friend went to talk to him he said he was totally ready but i am too afraid to ask him out because i dont know if he likes me or not so i need some help please somebody helpppppppppppppppppppppppp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! P.S. he stares at me alot and i like him alot did i mention that before???!!!!

Reply March 19, 2012, 9:33 pm

babykay

he more likely likes u

Reply April 20, 2012, 10:42 am

Sara

Ive Send a anonymous message he responded and after a lot of chats he said its mutual!
I need some guy advise to help me through this untill I meet him again

Reply March 14, 2012, 10:51 am

Angela

So obviously there is this guy, and we are pretty great friends. We don’t have any classes together, but we do ride the bus together. We are a year or two apart, him being older. In the mornings, I sometimes catch him looking back at me (In a effort to make me laugh, he does it all the time and knows it doesn’t take long for me to realize) and we will just smile at each other. Before school starts we’ll sometimes talk to each other, sometimes he seems to sneak up on me by surprise. After school, he’ll be waiting outside of the bus for me and walk with me to it, insisting I sit beside him. We always chat, and lately he has taken to ticking me in mini-wars. Very funny! He baked me some cookies for Valentines day; and when will sometimes randomly pat my head and mess with my hair. I just can’t tell if all of this is just his way of being my friend or if he likes me! My friends think he does, and a few people on the bus have commented that we seem to be really, really good friends.

Reply March 4, 2012, 10:40 pm

hopeful

can you tell if he likes me from this
we have known each other since pre-school and i have liked him since ive known him. he liked me when we were little but i don’t know anymore. lately he has been super nice to me but i have always seen him as a nice person. he seemed worried for me because i might be hurt for awhile and said he felt really bad for me, especially because we have P.E. together. when a different guy tried to make me do more than i could when we were doing something in running, he said that i have a condition and he doesn’t want me to get anymore hurt than i am. then, when my
P.E. teacher was being really mean about me trying to go back to sports, i was really upsets (in tears in everything, Cuz the teacher was being really mean) when we went to the next class we were partnered up to to the problems half and half, he offered to do all of them so i could rest. the next day, when i was walking instead of running, he passed me and said good luck and the teacher is being a real jerk. everytime he says something i get all happy cuz its always that nice.
pleas answer soon

Reply March 4, 2012, 4:11 am

Aly

This guy I’ve been hanging out with a lot…is fun, seems like there is a spark/connection. Some of the things he does and says makes me think he likes me, but then other things make me think the opposite. I asked him if he would be my date/+1 to a friend’s wedding. He said “I guess I can go with you.” He later asked what he should wear to it. I don’t see a whole lot of guys going to weddings, was just wondering if this could mean anything for potentially being more than friends? If it is a big sign or anything. Your thoughts Eric?? Please :)

Reply February 29, 2012, 10:07 pm

confused

so theres this guy i jus met 2 weeks ago. weatrted hangin out afte one night of drinkin n i fell asleep on his couch. in the morning he woke up wen he heard me wake up to come check on me n brought me into his room to lay more comfortably…instead of trying to have sex he held me n cuddled for the remainder of the morning. it wasnt until mid afternoon and hours of cuddling he kissed me….we cuddled for 2 days straight ….

that next monday i was textin him bt hiss evening plans n he was gonna jus go home n so i was like ok nevermind then but he decided to stop byafter all….

forgot to mention the night we went out unlike any other guy ever he came up to get me insted of watin in the car…

anyway so he came to my room n we watched a movie for a lil nthen ended up cuddlin n foolin around

the next day we didnt hang bc after work he ended up being pretty tired but we went out to dinner the follwing night n again i stayed at his place n we cuddled ( we always cuddle)

he always tickles me n messes wit me n jokes n stuff

we eat lunch at work almost everyday together

anyway we hung out again that fri-sat morning n then after a long drive he slept over my place that sunday

then that week i spent some nights over his house n one fri he told me not to eat bc he was takin me out….we both paid but

then i found out bt another girl n got all upset n he told me im the only one hes been screwin but hes single n we aint anything serious so to calm down n do whatever

n tht he dont want a relationship right now

so all was back to normal and that thursday i slept oevr again bc that weds he stopped by but didnt take me back home wit him like usual

that thursday he seemed a lil uninterested at first during sex but then was back in the swing of things

we didnt hang that weekend bc he was really tired n i was busy

and dint want me over monday n then

at work i foubd out hes dating this girl…n he is he told me wen i asked

but idk how its possible to spend 6/ of 14 days with me and 6″ home relaxin”
and be dating her for those same 2 weeks….

what is dating? ive read online a few diff meanings….bc he still claims singledom but yet hes dating her n seeing me n “foolin around” with me….

idlk if i shuld end r fun bc it might cause work place drama or continue it

its buggin me bc im into him n clealry hes somewhat into me and hasnt fooled aorund wit her in a while so again i ask what is DATING

thanks

Reply February 29, 2012, 3:10 am

ACK, I'M CONFUSED

So, I really like this boy, and I have for a while, (since grade 6) and we’re good friends, even though he’s a year younger than I am. We were put in the same class this year, and we sat with each other at the beginning, but we talked too much, so the teacher has never let us sit together again. We talk all the time, and I catch him looking at me in class sometimes, and all of my friends say he likes me, even though I think he doesn’t. He also flirts with pretty much everyone but he teases me A LOT and grabs my arm while we’re talking and stuff. But he also, like, hugs my other friend all the time, and she asks him to let go and he won’t, and once he told her he loved her, but when people asks him, he looks dead serious and says No, I don’t like her, so that’s also really confusing…
I’m graduating this year and since he’s in 7th grade, I won’t see him again when I’m in high school, but I think I’m in love, pretty much.
HELP.

Reply February 26, 2012, 4:26 pm

Lora

There is this guy that I really like…once I caught him looking at and when I did he didn’t look away so we stared for like 5 seconds and my friend was like what the hell come on lets go…I don’t know if he likes me but he told e that he likes my friend but my friend kinda likes him and they don’t even talk. The only time I talk to him is on Facebook which is online he always trys to get my attention like he walks past me once he even touched me on the back! I wish I knew if he liked me

Reply February 25, 2012, 12:52 pm

~Kenzie~

So obviously I’m having a guy problem. I’ve known him for a while and we always talk and text. When there are plenty of other seats in the room he comes and sits right next to me during classes. He also ditches his friends to come and talk to me. I’ve caught him looking at me a couple of times and he gets really close to me when we talk like he’s about to lean in and kiss me. He also grabs my hand a lot and rests his head on my shoulder. Apparently all my friends say we flirt with each other but I don’t think I do, on purpose anyways. I admit I think he’s cute but I only see him as a friend. He says he isn’t interested in anyone right now, but I want to know if he likes me or not. It’s driving me crazy. I’m not obsessing, I just really don’t want to hurt him if he asks me out.
Advice?

Reply February 22, 2012, 2:55 pm

Joanna

hey,
so there is a guy in my class….he is really popular and i think i like him… I’ve caught him looking at me once in a while and since his initials are the same as mine we both are group partners alot of time…it’s really embarrassing as i’m really shy …when ever i’m talking to him he looks me in my eye and i look down for some reason….
i was not feeling good once so i didn’t do PE in school and he came up to me n asked what happened…..he usually only talks to me in class but not when his friends are near him or not in the hallways or anything….he’s dated alot of girls before which i dont like at all but he’s single right now….. he used to be really loud even in front of me but now he’s more sophisticated and nice….we never used to talk before but now we do maybe because we r in the same groups….can you tell me what’s going on…..really need help….

Reply February 21, 2012, 10:11 pm

Ashie

Hey, im 14 year old girl right, tht goes to college, well i have my eye on this certain guy, and well one day at athletics he kept on staring at me from a distance, and when it came to relay, he came over put his hand on my shoulder and said “go well” to me! and i was thinking (OMG) lol as ya do, and then he said to this other guy that hurt me last year for athletics “dont stand on anyones foots okay?” bcuz he stood on my foot with spikey shoes and i had to get stiches. and so i thought he was like ya no, watching out for me, but when it comes to school, he just like doesnt stare at me as much, well maybe at lunch time and interval time, if im near him but, im in his class he just doesnt stare at me, but maybe im in an awkward sitting place so i probably cant notice him, but still, when im near he jist doesnt, and hes like one of the popular people ish and im just like un-popular but im kinda confused cuz one day he does like me and then the next he doesnt. its like wat da fug, and he doesnt really talk to me, but yeah. i think hes just to scared to ask me out bcuz im like un-popular and hes like popular and other people will think thats weird…. ya no so help me out here, just saying…. c(:

Reply February 20, 2012, 12:37 am

Marissa

There is this guy I really like in my grade and somehow he found out that I like him. We were good friends before, but now he is just totally ignoring me and has blocked me online. I didn’t confront him and now I don’t know what to do. I am fine with it if he doesn’t feel the same way about me, it’s fine if we are just friends. However, I can’t even tell him this, because I can never find him! Two of our friends have decided to help me, and they said that they would talk to him…but I don’t know what to do at all…Please help!

Reply February 18, 2012, 2:42 pm

confused, inexperienced teenager

I know it’s stupid that I’m even on these websites when I should be working it out myself but it’s driving me crazy.

I thought this article was really helpful and a lot of what you said really made sense. I’m really unsure of whether he likes me or just as a friend though. I have band with him twice a week and since he’s older we don’t see each other at any other time but when I walk past him at random times or he’s having a conversation with someone else he doesn’t seem that happy (not sad, but not smiling either) and his tone of voice isn’t that gah, I don’t know. But when I’m talking to him he’s smiling and his tone of voice sounds that little bit happier. (and he has the most gorgeous smile). Like the signs have said, he has started a conversation a few times (note, I’ve only had band 4 times this year because it’s a new school year) and he has said general things to me a few times when one of his friends is sitting on the other side of him.

I’m just scared that I’ll do the same thing I always do, ignore my feelings until they pass. But what if there’s even a small chance of it working? He finishes school in 2 and a half terms and I don’t wanna feel like I wasted my own time and let myself down once again.

I really want to do something, SOMETHING for once but 1. I don’t know what and 2. I don’t know if there’s a chance of it working. And he’s not that much older, 2-3 years. And I know I should at least work on my confidence because my confidence is close to non existent, only with a few of my friends am I more openly confident.

Anyone, I would really love some advice.

Reply February 17, 2012, 9:25 am

Eric Charles

Hey “confused”,
.
A few things…
.
First, if you think there might be a chance, then go for it. The mistake that holds most people back from going for it is they turn it into some huge ordeal. It’s not – just try to find ways to talk with him and connect with him and gradually try to move things forward one baby step at a time. Baby steps.
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For example, if you don’t talk much, find ways to see each other more and talk more. If you aren’t friends on Facebook, try for that. Or try to exchange numbers so you can text.
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But if taking a “next baby step” still feels like too much, then do whatever you think needs to happen before that step happens. If you feel that you need to be talking frequently and spending quality time together before you add each other on Facebook, then put your focus on spending great time together. Get me?
.
Also… you will never really, truly know how another person actually feels about you. Even if they’re very vocal… you’ll never know for sure.
.
But that’s OK because amazingly, people judge others heavily on how the receiver *reacts* to them. It’s an odd phenomenon, but it’s true.
.
In other words, if you decide that he DOES like you and that he’s into you, you’re going to act (and react) confidently when you’re around him, which will make you attractive (or more attractive) in his eyes.
.
So make the decision that he likes you, he’s into you and he wants to have something with you. Make that decision and respond to him accordingly.
.
If you can take baby steps towards getting closer and you can DECIDE to believe that he likes and wants you, you’ll be fine. Good luck.

Reply February 17, 2012, 10:20 am

confused, inexperienced teenager

Thanks heaps for all the help :D I will certainly try all that

Reply February 17, 2012, 11:54 am

O.E.R.O

So theres a guy who i really like but He really likes my friend but hey dnt talk at all , and well she doesnt really like hime , she thinks hes creepy . well he told me he likes my friend but the thing is ..they dnt talk and she ignores him alot. Me and him are always together . he walks me twe my classes ,waits for me and everything. we get along So great ..once in a while we would be talking and he would call me babe or honey ..nd yeah… well ive asked him who he likes and he always says my friend . hes not one of does guys that are after more than one girl at a time. ive asked myself if he likes me and i would like to know if he does. i would just ask him but i dont want anything to be awkward or something so ill rather just stay quiet and see if like one day he would mention something. So do you think he likes me or what ?

Reply February 17, 2012, 12:27 am

Secret sorry ;)

Wrote on my paper **

Reply February 9, 2012, 12:45 am

Secret sorry ;)

And At the end of last year he wrote on my that I’m amazing and on Facebook on this app he called me amazing :) good sign? Please help. Thx.

Reply February 9, 2012, 12:44 am

cynthiangela

you see, i really love this guy, okay i’m still in high school
but we had been classmates since grade 4 until we graduated but now we are far apart
i started having a crush on this guy but i dont know if he really likes me, every night i dreamt about him..about that we are together talking….last time…my crush and i seldomly talked,,,he just talked to me when he needs something….but i just blushed
sometimes i would caught him staring at me but when i am able to look at him…he glazed away….what is this feelings for?

Reply February 8, 2012, 7:05 am

Secret sorry ;)

Super sorry but I forgot to mention that we have known and gone to the same school since preschool so 10 years :) and lol I think he liked me in preschool too :) and he always smiles at me ;) but I’m super sad cause we are going to different high schools next year :( and I had his number but we both got new phones and I’ve been kinda to shy to ask for it again but when we did have each others numbers, he got a concusion so he wasn’t at school so I texted him ” where were you today” and then he told me about his concusion so I repiled ” aww now I feel bad for you :(” and he wrote ” naww don’t feel bad for me” is that a good sign or what?? Sorry I’m bugging you about this so much :/ please reply though :)

Reply February 8, 2012, 2:01 am

Secret sorry ;)

Hehe also it seems like he is very confident around his friends then when he’s around me it seems like he’s toned down or something.. And I know that my feelings for him are true cause it’s been a year that I started liking him and I still do :) and 2 days ago he was in my class during reccess trying to get this bottle from a boy in my class and so they were like ‘fighting’ for the bottle and the one I like was like hey “my name” :P get the bottle for me so I grabbed it from the other boy and gave it to him, so what I’m getting to is that he asked me to do something for him so is that a good sign?? Btw he knows my name but I’d like that to remain a secret :) and last year when we sat beside each other he would always make his knee touch mine and I never pulled my knee away and he didn’t either :)) good sign??? Please respond cause I really want him to like me or I really would like to know if he does like me before our grade 8 grad cause there’s a dance during that so I’d kinda like to dance with him :)))))) thx :)

Reply February 8, 2012, 1:47 am

Secret sorry ;)

Ok so I am like completely in love :) I’m in grade 8 but still, I love this boy :) it all started in grade 7 so last year, when we had to sit beside each other for the whole school year :) so from that we bonded. Now in grade 8 we arent in each others class so I never get to talk to him except for after school, on the bus ride home. So ya we go on each others bus but even there I don’t really get to talk to him cause he’s got some friends from grade 7 that go on our bus and I have some friends from grade 8 so we never sit with each other very often…. So far this year we have sat with each other 2 times and still barely talked :( but when we don’t sit with each other I will find him looking at me and once we looked in to each others eyes for about five seconds :) and today i think i saw him look at me about 5 times and my friends on the bus told me that we would be a cute couple and one of the girls told me that she really thinks that he likes me too :) but I’m not sure.once he accidentally spilled yogurt on me and he was like wiping it off of me :) I need some help I dream about him every night please comment some help :) (:

Reply February 8, 2012, 1:15 am

Leena

I think this guy in my class is flirting with me..he always does silly things like messes with my computer when I’m not looking and i also noticed him starin at me from his seat…and when I catch him in one of his little tricks he gives me this what seems to be a flirtascious smile(this is almost an everyday thing)…but I haven’t acted on this because I’m in a very committed relationship and though this other guys sweet….I’m devoted to my boyfriend of 2 years.

Reply February 7, 2012, 7:41 pm

Sarah

There’s this guy that I’ve been (best) friends with, and like others, he stares at me. We’re in the same classes and whenever I catch him looking at me, (I think) he grins with big eyes right at me to cover his caught action. (Doesn’t want me to know that he’s staring at me???) He also tries to hold my hand when I’m unaware. I don’t even know what he wants, but could anyone answer this? It really bugs me. LOADS.

Reply February 5, 2012, 9:22 pm

Jay

So im wondering if this guy is interested in me. He is drop dead gorgeous and im unsure if I stand a chance. We never talked at school, then one day while I was talking to a mutual friend of his he jumped in the conversation, although it didnt last long. The next day on facebook I posted a status and he commented on it with something from the conversation we had the day before although it was completely irrelevant to the status. The comments exceeded 300 comments before we finally stopped. A week later he messaged me on facebook and we have been messaging for 2 weeks now, although the conversation is just random things. Could he like me, or just wants a new friend?

Reply February 1, 2012, 1:05 am

Kaitlen

well, it all started in year 8… at school we were reading the book “coram boy” however this was the adapted play version… if you have read the book this will be easy to follow… okay so i got to be Mellisa Milcote, and then this boy got the part as Alexandar Ashbrook… and yes the 2 characters like eachother and they had a baby, however The boy now keeps going around school saying “i had it with you” and wherever i see him thats all he ever says. and now he stares at me constanly in English and i get the feeling that he is kinda stalking me… okay so now im nearly finished year 9 and he still goes on and on about it and then to make things worse we read another book when mine and his character had it and yes he said those things again but i dont know why he is doing this? and now he is paying attention to what colour my hair is or how much mascara i use… So does he like me or does he not…. thanks

Reply January 30, 2012, 9:12 am

I Don't Usually Do These Things

Well, obviously there’s a guy I’m into, or else I wouldn’t be here!

He’s in my class, and we don’t really talk that much. However, I keep catching his eyes a lot during class or in the hallways. I know that this is going to sound like I’m being too hopeful or that I’m looking into things too much, but once when he was in the front of the class reciting an improv speech, he was looking at my eyes the whole time.

And now for the part where I go completely bonkers and read into things too much.

I don’t know if this is teasing, but during drama, he continually blocks my ideas when we’re improvising onstage. Once, when he had the power to “control” the people on the stage, he even made me sing. I refused of course, but he smiled at me afterwards.

He’s also very good at sports, but recently whenever I’m in his group for basketball, he seems to have trouble getting the ball in net. Though I suppose he could just be having an off day… But once when he was on the other team, he actually passed the ball to me intentionally (but another more likely explanation is that his team members sucked and I was a decent player).

There was also a time when he was one of the science fair participants I was researching on. At first he kept messing around to mess up my results, but he stopped when I asked him nicely and scored much higher. I’m not sure if this is a sign of interest, because he’s just one of those guys who looks to joke around. The fact that he only messed with my testing makes me wonder if he likes me or if he just plain out hates me.

A possible reason that he’s not interested in me is that when I asked for his number for a dare, he smiled and told me “I’m not telling YOU.”.

I like to smile at him in those instances in class web we HAVE to work with each other, but I think I might have said something to make him mad. A male friend in my class (he’s not into me) wad trying to prove that my crush wasn’t attractive to the entire female population of our school. This was several months ago, so I was still a new student. When he asked me if I found Anonymous attractive, I told him no (downright lie, now that I think about it), and my crush heard me.

The same male friend asked me if Anonymous had hit on me yet, though I may have heard wrong (my friends chose that moment to have a loud debate over Harry Potter and The Lord of the Rings). Or he could have been speaking to the girl beside me.

But it’s obvious he thinks I’m smart, and he told me so when we were working on a group project.

Anyways, you don’t have to reply, as I’m pretty sure you have better things to do than listen to the problem of teenage girls.

Reply January 28, 2012, 6:41 pm

April

Hey Eric,
Okay so there is this guy that I met a few weeks ago in school. Ever since then we have been talking a lot , and getting to know each other . He initiates conversations with me and is always looking directly into my eyes when he speaks to me. He tends to lean in when we are sitting together and is cracking jokes when I’m with him. I caught him staring at me today, and our eyes met and he didn’t look away and I catch him looking at me frequently. I really like this guy and I’m pretty sure that he likes me . But, I am waiting for him to make a move. I’m wondering what I can do to really let him know that I’m interested without seeming too much? Thanks !

Reply January 25, 2012, 9:04 pm

i am too cute for this

Eric Charles help me please…. so i am in high school and i am in 9th grade (15 yrs old) female and he’s in 11th grade (17 yrs old) maybe idk…. well anyways i really like this guy and i kinda think he like me too… he always staring at me ALWAYS staring at me and i never stare at him even thou i like him… he talk to every girl (my friends) but he doesnt talk to me like one day his friend sat at my table at lunch time and he move…and one time his cuzzin told me he said i was fine and he think he have a chance with me but he doesnt know how to approach me… then i went from being attractive to just decent which i am okay with… his friends are always staring at me it’s like they watching me and telling him everything i do…. i am just tired of the stares i don’t know if i am ugly to him i really need your help… one day i broke the ice… sooo one day i was walking to spanish class and i see him so i hung out a little in the hallway…. and i caught his eye and i ask him can i talk to him he say yeah and i told him i have a crush on him, i thought he was cute and he was blushing and smiling soo hard i swear… it was cute it was… and i also told him i wanted to get to know him more and he told me i can but i never talk to him… so after that day i use to say hi to him and then i stop because when he seen me he’ll never say hi first it was me doin all the work and so it last until a week in a half ahaha i kno…but now it’s just staring again… and i am losing my interest in him and i am not gonna take this any longer… also he has a lot of girls that like him and that always on him but me i am not the type to be all on you i am a relax chick…. and he just always following my ways and tryna get close to me and copying me and if i leave to go somewhere here he comes… but then he play the ingoring game and i do too but i am trired of it now…. sooo what you i should do!!!!thx u=)

Reply January 24, 2012, 7:38 pm

Kate

Okay so theres this guy who says he fancied someone else to his friend, yet he always mucks around/flirts with me and loads of other girls, Recently he adjusted the school headphones so they fit me, took my work and wouldnt give it back and put his basketball bib on my head so i couldnt see. What does this mean? HELP!

Reply January 23, 2012, 12:40 pm

Anj

I have this classmate of mine who is my crush. He’s a nice guy and treats girls nicely. Whenever we see each other in the hallway, he can’t look at me and act like I’m invisible. We never talk in class because I am shy and he always try to talk to me by asking senseless questions. He’s a mysterious guy and lots of girls like him. I’m wondering why he acts nice and cool with other girls, but when he’s talking to me or near me he can’t talk neither look at me in the eye. What does it mean?

Reply January 21, 2012, 2:22 am

Anj

I have this classmate of mine who is my crush. He’s a nice guy and treats girls nicely. Whenever we see each other in the hallway, he can’t look at me and act like I’m invisible. We never talk in class because I am shy and he always try to talk to me by asking senseless questions. He’s a mysterious guy and lots of girls like him. I’m wondering why he acts nice and cool with other girls, but when he’s talking to me or near me he can’t talk neither look at me in the eye.

Reply January 21, 2012, 2:20 am

Chloe

There’s a boy… :)
We started talking and texting about a month ago and we would text every night and he would flirt with me and it was really sweet :) after we came back to school from winter break we kept talking and texting and then one of my friends talked to him. he admitted that he kinda liked me. when he said it he blushed & smilied. I really really like him. We talk every day at school and we make each other smile and laugh. I wanna know does he like me?

Reply January 20, 2012, 9:02 pm

Katie

Hi, I’m 11 and there is this guy I kinda like…. He is really funny and weird but I really like that about him :) Were not really friends though, he doesn’t be mean to me or anything but today we kinda had contact I suppose?? I am like overweight anyways so nobody would like me. But idk maybe he is different?? But nobody likes people like me. Should I just leave it? I have just recently asked to be his friend on this social networking site. I like him, but he wont like me ever!!

Reply January 20, 2012, 1:09 pm

Karen

Awwww girlie … there is someone for everyone :) And your weight doesn’t inhibit people from “liking” you …. you not liking yourself is what keeps people from seeing how beautiful you are :) I say go for it … get to know him better … talk to him :) You never know until you try … and let your inner beauty shine! Good luck!

Reply January 23, 2012, 2:10 am

ali

theres this boy i really like but i dont know if he likes me, we talk a few times a day at school and when im not at school he will text me and ask if im okay and he pokes me and in music he hit my butt with a drum stick one day and he always pokes me and he calls me goth(because im quiet and i always wear my hair down but im not goth) and he always says i flirt with all of these boys (his friends) but i dont and we can text for hours at a time and he has touched my leg before and he flirts with me and stuff but he flirts with alot of girls and he calls me short (not in a mean way tho) and him and one of his friends lockers are by my locker and they always try to close my locker when i get it open (not in a mean way) and when we text he always talks about gross stuff and he has said that he doesnt have a gf to ppl in front of me b4.

does he like me?!

Reply January 19, 2012, 5:11 pm

Haleigh669

i like this guy..I’ve never talked to him before at all.He’s really cute.And my friends know him and said he’s super cool and nice.I’ve seen him around school alot.Some of my friends told him I liked him and he just said ”ok”.I was with my friends at my locker and i went to put on my makeup when i came back the guy i like was right there.I got so scared i ran to the nearest bathroom.i waited and came out he was still there and i ran again!Then one of my friends took a picture of me and i tryed to get her to retake the pic but she had to go.The problem was the pic was blurred and from the angle it was taken it made me look like i had a big fore head.So she came back the next day and said she showed it to him and he said he didn’t like me because I was shy,wore too much lipstick and had a big forehead(because of the pic).But the thing is I’m not shy at all.Im like the life of the party.So I kept trying to make up my mind to at least say hi or wave to him.But every time he passes me i freeze.And when he walks by its like he doesn’t even see me.He acts like he has no idea im the girl from the pic or like nothing ever happened and im scared to say hi because he might think im weird or something because so many people already told him i liked him.and that i wont take his no far an answerWHAT DO I DO!!!HELP ME!!!

Reply January 12, 2012, 10:43 am

Elia

I liked this guy who I thought was quite odd at first.. He always pretended like he didn’t know my name at first and he’d randomly compliment me. He always ask me random things and he’s such a gentleman, always holding doors for me and picking up things I drop. Then I realized he acts Different around me, in a good way. He teases me, and I guess he’s just grown on me. His friends tease him about him liking me and he always says hi to me in the halls. And frankly I love it. <3

Reply January 11, 2012, 8:16 pm

Mikayla

I like a guy his name is Gavin and I have talked to him online a lot but rarely face to face and he ” checks me out ” in the halls of school. He’s always got a smile on his face when he looks at me does this mean he likes me or could like me or not?

Reply January 7, 2012, 11:01 pm

Haleigh669

Well,I look this guy at my school.I never talked to him before…I think he’s cute and my friends tell me he’s really cool.One of my friends told him I liked him and he just acted indifferent.He just said okay.Is that bad???

Reply January 3, 2012, 7:53 pm

amy

hi so i met this guy in guatemala which im recently visiting now to see my family. i live in florida. well my cousin has been talking to him without my knowledge and she asks him if he likes me. all he says is why dont you tell me first if she likes me. so she tells him yes and he says he doesnt know what to do and then he had to leave so i didnt find out anything more. later that night my cousins were going to spend the night at his house and they came back a little while later calling me. so i go down to where they are and my 2 cousins are there with him. they tell him to say it and he finally looks up and wishes me a good night. i dont know if they forced him or they were there for support but my cousins wont exactly tell me. then the next day my aunt wanted to take a pic of both of us together but we didnt exactly cooperate. finally i gave in and sat down but we were far away from each other and my aunt starts complaining so he scoots over more. after she gets the pic we both get up and walk in opposite directions. everyone says hes just shy and that he likes me but i dnt know. he never looks at me, and everyone always teases us when were together. he avoids looking at me when he enters the house or sits behind something so i dont see him but everyone says he comes to the house more often. i just cant tell, can you please help and give me some advice.

Reply January 2, 2012, 3:30 pm

ChRiStInA

Hi!
I have an issue, can u help?
There is this guy i like, of course. And he texts me just about every night, we have long conversations and there not of any importance. But just the other day he started getting a little bit deeper and deeper.. I thought i was getting off lucky! I thought i may have had him hooked. But he has started to involve my best friend in most of the topics.. I tried just shrugging it off and moving on but it doesnt seem to change, Did i blow my chance? Can i get him back?
Thanks for listening. :)

Reply December 30, 2011, 2:58 am

Giselle

I’m a junior in highschool and tend to not care about guys or “relationships”, but somehow I ended up taking an interest in my friend who’s a senior. I’m almost 78% sure that he atleast has an actual interest in me, however he’s sort of “involved” with someone else. This someone else is a freshman girl who I became friends with after becoming friends with him. he doesn’t want arelationship with her , he just wants to have fun. I completely understand why considering she constantly “yes mans” him laughing at everything he says , and he just got outof a 7 month long relationship and will be leaving for college in 6 months. Honestly i dont care that he’s leaving for college soon, I dont want a “serious relationship”, I mean come on im in highschool.. The only thing getting in my way is her. This guy is really smart and loves conversation and challennges, both of which I give him. I just dont know how to handle a situation like this. I think i need to show him that aside from conversation, I can also give him the same attention -physically- that this other girl can. How can I send this message across, or deal with this other girl ? maybe it’s not even worth it??

Reply December 26, 2011, 12:14 am

Jaimee

So there’s this guy… I’ve known him for about 2 years now, and we’ve become really close friends, but lately something feels different. He told me he has something important he needs to tell me, but that he’s not quite ready to tell me yet. What can this mean? Does he like me? And if he doesn’t tell me soon should I tell him how I feel?

Reply December 21, 2011, 1:58 am

Eliza

Hello Eric,

Ok so there’s this boy I really like. I’ve like him for about 2 years now. We met through a choir, and we see each other once a week, and he asks me to sing with his regularly. Anyway, I’m not sure if he likes me. He hugs me whenever I see him, and not just once, multiple times. (he hugs other girls but not for as long, and only once) He always wants to be with me when he can, and we tell each other everything. We can talk for hours, like just last night, we talked for about 3 and a half hours! And lately he has started to say I love you babeh, and just I love you, and also calling me sexy (mind you, I’m not that good looking xD). There’s more, but I will stop there. Anyway, last night while we were talking, he said something that really confused me, because I was sure that he liked me, EVEN MY PARENTS THOUGHT SO!! Anyway, he’s been writing his own songs, and last night he said ‘I need song ideas. One of them is going to be about the struggles in life, and one of the others sounds like a love song, but I’m not in love so I will just pretend.’ I know he doesn’t have to love me to have a crush, BUT DOES THIS MEAN HE DOESN’T LIKE ME? He is 14 and I am 13. Please, please help me.

P.S. I’m too shy to ask him out, so it would be really good if you could give me some tips on how to show him I’m interested without telling him.

Reply December 20, 2011, 9:01 am

Chloe

There’s this guy that I have known since 1st grade, and we’ve always been on good terms with one another. I asked him to a dance last year, but he cancelled a few weeks before saying how he wanted to wait to date, but that if he were to go with anyone, he would want it to be me. now here we are a year later, and when we text each other, he seems really flirty, always complimenting me, saying we should talk more, etc. But what has me confused is, I’m always the one that texts him first, it’s never the other way around. What does this mean? Am I being pushy by being the one that texts first? Help!

Reply December 19, 2011, 1:52 pm

Abby

Hey,
So there is this guy I like A LOT!!! But, he has rejected every girl that has asked him out in our grade… I mean he always starts a conversation with me, asks for a pencil with acute smile on his face, and many other things like today he walked me to my locker. But, I don’t know if he likes me or not?!?!?! It is so confusing… People says that he knows and he likes me back and my friend is blackmailing me about it… What she is going to do is ask him out for me!! But I am too shy to ask him myself…

Reply December 12, 2011, 10:20 pm

TS

Hi,
I have this guy who I feel is giving me signals that he likes me, but he has a girlfriend. We are in highschool, and they’ve only been together 2 months and have had a fight. I don’t wish them to separate, I just really like him. We are friends and talk and whatnot. We lost touch over summer, but started to talk again recently. I feel all gooey inside around him and I feel like I love him! He is amazing! He is funny, sweet, sincere, cute, everything.
When I’m having a bad day and I text him, he will respond and listen to me. When I told him an issue and felt unimportant… his response was that I am important to him. Him and I hug, he’s gotten into my personal space before as well purposefully. We stand next to each other in chorus and when he had to move he was sad and extended his arm out looking sad. He seems to like to make me laugh and be with me. There was an electric tension spark between us last time we stood next to each other. He is glad we are back in touch. I’m important to him he says… he smiles at me, talks to me about his life as well, seems to trust me. He plays around with me, joking with me and whatnot… gives really warm hugs. When I came into school with a cast on, he walked up to me and asked if I am okay and hugged me and signed the cast .He looked concerned and when I went up to him and asked for a hug he gave me a really great hug and seemed into It and wanted to know what was up and seemed truly concerned and like he really does care.
He has a girlfriend. My friend says they make out around the school. They’ve fought once already…
And when he talks to me, it’s like he’s willing to talk to me, but he NEVER mentions his girlfriend. These all must be signs. And he’s done so much more.
I REALLY like this guy! He’s my friend, but when I think about him I am grinning from ear to ear and feel all good inside and yeah…
I like him SO much! What do you think?

Reply December 11, 2011, 6:13 pm

Michelle

Hi
So i like this guy about 2 months younger than me and I’m wondering if he likes me. He like touches my hair once in a while, he makes me laugh a lot, he stares at me like 24/7, and we talk a lot just the 2 of us. I have liked this guy since 3rd grade. I just need to know. Please tell me.

Thx

Reply December 10, 2011, 9:35 pm

Anonymous

I have a friend who I’ve been friends with for about a year now. We’ve hung out before with other people and he has given me rides and hung out during school events. But he never gave any impression of him being interested in a relationship with me. Since he graduated, we only talk every so often. We’ve been talking constantly for a few days now and he said, “We should go to the movies.” I said yes, thinking nothing of it. But it will be the two of us. It’s just a little shocking since he has never asked me to the movies before. So is it a friend thing? Or is it a date? I just want to know!

Reply December 8, 2011, 9:03 pm

Tiffani

Ok. I have an utterly confusing situation right now. I’ve liked this guy Logan since we met and now my best friend has started to like him and she doesn’t know that for three years I have begun to fall in love with him. Now she’s obsessive over him, always talking about him, telling me how he calls her beautiful and all this other stuff. Do you think she could possibly just like the idea of someone liking her since she’s never had a boyfriend or something? I honestly dont know what I should do and it is heart crushingly painful to watch. Can you help?

Reply December 7, 2011, 10:11 pm

Taylor

I went to turkey for a holiday with my mum dad and brother .. In our complex there was a small bar where everyone went to with two working bar men called erhan and ozi now ozi is 27 and erhan is 38 while I was over the bar ozi was looking at me up and down then hugged me, then another day he was staring in my eyes and I kept looking away because I always feel uncomfertable when someone stares at me in the eyes he told me to not be afraid and look in his eyes and he had a wierd look on his face like he liked me..then another day he started charging at me (joking ) with a serious face I walked backwards and hit the table so I couldn’t move he was pressed against me and he pinched my belly while he was really close and stll staring in my eyes.. Then another day I was leaving the bar and ozi shook my hand but held on to it for a Minuit while still talking to me does this meen he fancies me ??

Reply December 7, 2011, 7:29 am

Greg

Lol this is actually kinda fun reading all this stuff.
@ Snickers
If you were that cold to me I would just give up. Don’t pretend shit or anythin like that. If he’s pointing at you and laughing that’s not really good tbh. But I mean if your just ignoring him then he’s gonna distance himself from you. That simple. If he doesn’t have the balls to straight up talk to you then he’s not worth your time.
OH YEAH. If a guy says your pretty then he basically likes you. We never go for a compliment that will mean a great deal as just that, a compliment. If were gonna say your pretty then we have some sort of connection with you. Now if he says your “nice” “good at basketball” “pretty cool” “really chill” “smart” etc. It doesn’t really mean much. Now if he deliberately looks you in the eye and directs something like “Your beautiful.” “Your a great person” something with a little more..power to it..I don’t know it’s hard to explain. Go by tone and use of words that are descriptive. The more descriptive the better I guess you could say. IF YOU LAUGH IT OFF THAT’S THE EQUIVALENT TO KICKING HIM IN THE NUTS.

Reply December 6, 2011, 5:10 pm

Greg

If you give a girl a really long hug THEY* will usually nestle into your arms.

Reply December 6, 2011, 4:55 pm

Greg

Whoa. I was looking through how to write a book and I typed in guy then this website showed up. I know this isn’t a request like all the others and I probably don’t have much of right to post this..thing. But still it’s REALLY refreshing to know that there are girls who don’t go around giving out blow jobs because you give them 20 bucks (That’s legit not even a joke. I know six different girls who do shit like that.) Anyway, I kinda just want anybody who’s actually reading this to know something. Sometimes it is our objective to make a girl go crazy. To mess with their head. It means one of two things, they either a. Just want to screw with you or B. Want you to enhance your own emotions towards him so you will “glorify” him. For B. We usually do something like that (and this is kinda mean) for sexual reasons or we do it because we think you are out of our league. I, myself, have done stuff like that. For instance, really really graceful, nice, just a good person overall. All that good stuff, well anyway she basically fell for me and I found myself getting smothered 24/7, at first I was HELLA HAPPY then after like two weeks I was straight up annoyed. Don’t fall for the tricks, we are all idiots and don’t think ahead. I can truly admit that hahahaha. So first off if you continuously text a guy and he only texts you back on certain days or times that is the basic trick. It actually works pretty well. Usually what happens is that the girl gets aggravated and will wait for a response, once they get it they are actually happy. (I can say all this with absolute certainty, by the way) Another one would be simply giving a hug. Sounds pretty stupid. In my experience if you give a girl a really long hug and will nestle into your arms and stay there. If they pull away once that happens you know that they are just using another stupid trick on you. The list for this stuff just goes on and on. Oh yeah and IF A GUY IS TEXTING YOU BACK IN 20 MINUTE INTERVALS IT BASICALLY MEANS HE’S PLAYING COD. ACTUALLY IF HES TEXTING YOU BACK PERIOD IT MEANS HE LIKES YOU. COD IS COD. Yep. Well it’s already really weird that I’m a guy posting a well-thought-out comment on a specifically girl website sooo..Probably gonna end it here.

Reply December 6, 2011, 4:52 pm

Eric Charles

No shame in posting on a girl site. I do (but then again, I also own the company…) :)
.
It’s actually nice to have another guy posting his two cents.
.
If you really want to make your head spin, check out the dating advice forum… The girls would love to have another dude in there posting his thoughts:
.
http://dating.anewmode.com/
.
Thanks for the comment.

Reply December 6, 2011, 6:27 pm

britt

ok so i like a guy but my friend likes him to and we both know each other likes his but she went out with him any ways and dident ask me if it was ok with me and when she did go out with him she didnt even tel me so i had to find that out on my own then another one of my friends told him that i like him and i didnt want her to so i dont know what to do pease help me any one please

P.S the guy that i like is nova my freid who is going ou with him is leslee the girl who told nova that i like him is amani and i am brittney

P.P.S PLEASE HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Reply December 4, 2011, 2:03 pm

Snickers

Hi my name is Snickers(fake name). I have this boy i like. I’ve only known him since September. We have gotten to know each other. Before he even knew i liked him, he used to show me lots of magic tricks. And well, he and i used to be in cross country. I was a loner in there, but he would always try to talk to me. Towards the end of the season, he kept asking if i am going to join basketball but i keep tlling him no. And he kept convincing me.too. so basketball season start. And well i told him i liked him…. This was recently. From mon.- tues. He would always look at me. And my friend(without my permission) texted him if he liked him.. he said idk and she repeated it and he said as a friend. and her last question was why do you look at her then? and he never wrote back. So like wed. to today i would be coming out of health class last, and he would be like second out. When i go out, he would be standing right there, and when he sees me, he pretends he was doing something else. Or he would be slowly walking out. When he turns the corner he would look back thinking it was me or someone else. One day we did a skit, he was in the front of the class, he was watching me so turned around and closed my eyes, and last on my friend came up to me and said when i turned he was staring at my head. i was freaked out.after that hour one day, when i got to my locker, i looked up to see who was standing right there, i saw it as him,, when he saw me i think, he went to his locker. His locker is like 10 lockers away from mine. And when i was getting my book i could feel he was looking. i made sure to slam my locker loudly. On tues. after 4th hour, he tapped me on the shoulder and said “Clare do you have my notebook?” with the biggest smile yet, and i said no and he said “oh well oka” and i said “i gave it to ms.Charles.” and when i said that i turned and left as quick as i can to health. also today um… i was in advisory(he’s in every single one of my classes) i was readn a magizine with my friend and i saw his head go a little back and he was looking me. & When i was writing my essay in there, i looked up and i saw him well, turn around and look at me. ALso when the bell rang, i was still doing my essay, when i was done i looked up and saw him still there,when i started getting ready to leave he did the same. and before he hit the door , i went to talk to the teacher and by then he was out. when i got out to my locker, he looked at me. Also considering he has a recent girlfriend. i tried to forget him within that week but he keeps popping into my head, and i would catch him looking at me. i don’t really know what to do and i just want to come up to him say “Why do you keep looking?” but i can’t. Also, one more thing, i am a cheerleader and well i don’t look like one because i were black clothes and all but at one of our games, he would watch me. And when i changed at the last game, i was watching the game and he was across the court and i guess when i looked at him once, i saw he was pointing towards me and looking at me and i pretended i didn’t care… Does he like me? or what? if he doesn’t, what should i do? if he does, what should i do?
P.S. sometimes when i go to bed, i dream about him and my dreams are always long.

Reply December 2, 2011, 11:22 pm

layla

there this guy! and my friends say he likes me.because he talks to me when he sees me.
he asked me where i lived (probably because he wanted to walk home with me)
the first time we meet he asked for my number.
he touches me in a playful way eg. touches my leg.
his called me hot and cute before.
he all ways stares at me (in a playfull way) and doesnt trun around when i look at him.
hes laid down on my lap before.
however hes touched a guy infrout of me in a playfull way but i was laughing.
also hes bi.
does this guy like me? or not?

Reply December 2, 2011, 1:01 pm

FeeLingLoved

I have been liking this boy for 6 years now and for the past 3 years ive been sitting behind him in class, We Talk and joke around almost everyday.,And told him i liked this guy and minutes later he asked me if Why did i like this boy.,and Everytime my Friend teases him that he likes me they said he blushes and smiles like this time we were playing truth or dare they asked me to hug him and i did and he smiled and blush. does this mean he likes me? or his just ashamed

Reply November 30, 2011, 10:04 am

Rockkyy

Heyy guys I really need some help!!
So there’s this guy and I think he likes me but I don’t know! So we play soccer together and we made a bet, that if he didn’t get scored on then I would kiss him.. And he didn’t get scored on. So I still owe him. He doesn’t text me often and when he does it’s because I texted him first. We don’t have much to talk about but he’s sexy and I like him. The coach told me that he has a girlfriend at school but I haven’t asked him about that. That’s all the info I have… Does he like me???

Reply November 22, 2011, 6:14 pm

Brianna

There is a boy in my class who I REALLY like. And, after the past couple of months..I Was positive he liked me back, too. Flirty game things we did back and forth, and he always made sure to say something to me at least once every day. Well, my friend was feeling gutsy so she walked up to him, said we would be cute, and asked if he liked me. He said not really. Things after that have been weird and he barely talks to me. I don’t understand how though, after how much flirting he has done. He’s not the player type, either. I catch him staring at me in class still even if we don’t talk that day. Could he have just been put on the spot by how abrupt it was? Or does he really not and I guess he just likes to flirt with his friends? Thanks for the help :)

Reply November 21, 2011, 12:26 am

Roxxi Blueberry

there’s this guy im good friends with at church who im starting to really like :3 . last week he was staring at me nonstop while in service. it creeped me out but i kinda liked it.. so i kept making funny faces and then he made those same funny faces back. i dunno he looks at me like as if im the most beautifulest gurl he’s seen in his entire life. and hes always talking to me… :o does this mean he likes me?? :o plzz reply

Reply November 20, 2011, 5:32 am

Lynn

There’s this guy that goes to my school. On the day of visitation we both noticed one another, but did not speak. Now everytime we see each other we continue to stare, but still have not spoken. What does this mean? Is he interested in me or not?

Reply November 19, 2011, 4:58 pm

taterizzy

Okay… I really like a guy and for about 1 week every time i thought about him my heart would skip a beat…weird i no… But at the beginning of the year I noticed him looking at me alot at 1st i thought it was weird then i started liking hi and we made eye contact in class a few times but he would never talk to me so i went up to him and asked about the spanish homework because i have history and spanish and i started blushing a ton when i told them, and i never blush at all. But i really like him but he has kinda been like looking at me in class then just randomly not for a while then doing it again and now I’m confused but noe i really really like him and he is still looking at me and his friends keep getting his attention when i sort of look his way and look at me funny and smile if i look at him…. And today in spanish we were working by eachother and someone said something and he laughed really loud and turned a little in my direction… Like i said i really like him and I want to talk to him but not in person but i dont have a facebook…i’m not allowed ti have one but he has one… When ever he looks at me to like pass papers to me he smiles really big and when I talked to him he was smiling really big and looked at me for a really long time then i ackwardly was like ok never mind then but thanks anyways… and he seemed more interested since but idk…should i talk to him but like what should i talk about i dont know what to do I’ve never liked anyone like this even the guy i asked out for 4 periods at school then kinda freaked out and broke up with him…but we are best friends… but i like this guy more than the other guy and i asked the other guy out but i freeze around him… idk wut to do please help!

Reply November 15, 2011, 12:44 am

KARAZ

@ AP you know when a girl and a guy looks at each other in a special way there is always something there. You think he would even bother looking at you if hes not interested? A guy who would not look away when you look at him is either just a brave cocky prick, or he has a crush on you. But when you look at each other a lot then you both gotta solve that problem. Life is too short for any regrets so the next time you catch him looking at you and he doesnt look away, hold it and look at him directly in his eyes then move closer to him without looking away. Then say, are we gonna talk or look at each other?

Reply November 14, 2011, 8:36 pm

Elle

i meant class helper lol and also he randomly cOmes up and talks to me making an easy conversation I hope this extra bit of info helps!

Reply November 14, 2011, 7:20 pm

Elle

Hi Eric :)
I really really really need your help. I really like this guy and I was almost positive that he liked me back up until a few days ago, here’s how it started:

So it’s my first year of highschool, so I didn’t know him before. We always play wrestle and “argue” and in gym class he was my partner for dodgeball and we had this thing going on, I try to watch if his pupils get bigger but I cant focus on his eyes quite yet. He texts me everyday and he talks to me atleast 10 times a day, one day in gym class we were flirting and one if the class Hellers asked my friend if me and this guy had something going on. My friend said no and then after she told me she told him… And he wanted to know more about what the teacher had said, so did I but my friend said that nothing else was said by the teacher. Things didn’t get awkward at all we still talked still texted. But it feels like he has been not flirting but joking with other girls kinda slightly treating them the same way and I’m really confused, we also catch eyes with eachother in class and hold it there for a bit and he always smiles when hes around me but I’m sooo confused maybe he’s just a flirt? I asked my friends what they thought and they said they think he likes me but idk it feels as if one day he really wants to talk with me and hang out, but then the next day he doesn’t. Please can you help me?
Thanks and I love your webpage too!

Reply November 14, 2011, 7:16 pm

AP

So, there’s this guy who’s been looking at me for a long time. I always noticed him too, but was already in a relationship. Now, I’m single and ready for a new relationship, I’ve been looking back and smiling when we pass each other (same office building). He locks his eyes on me with a very direct and intense look whenever we pass. But this a.m. we ran into each other unexpectedly. He was with a colleague and I was alone. I noticed him there first; when he clamped eyes on me, we held each other’s gaze for what felt like an eternity. I was too stunned to even smile. Ergh. He even stopped in his tracks. It was almost like we both wanted to stop and talk, even though we don’t know each other’s names.

Anyhow, he looked away first, then walked to catch up with his friend. He didn’t even look back over at me. That felt brutal. I’m disappointed I didn’t get a chance to say hi or even smile.

Was that a sign that he’s really not interested after all? Or was he just taken off guard too?
Should I give up now or smile and say hi next time I see him?

Reply November 8, 2011, 11:45 am

Tara

I like this one guy and I told two people I liked him about a week ago and he already knows I like him. I have to sit by him in math but he didn’t show any signs that he knew. The only reason I know he knows I like him is because my friend told me that he went up to her and asked if she heard the news that I like them, but she was nice and pretended that she had no idea what I was talking about. So mostly can you tell me the best and/or worst case scenarios?

Reply November 1, 2011, 11:15 pm

Nisha

Whoops.. News does travel fast, eh!?
First go and check on the two people you told your news to.
Are you & this boy good friends? If you’re at least decent buddies, you could not be in a bad fix as it seems.

Reply November 2, 2011, 2:52 pm

shariell

if i ask a guy if he thinks im cute and he smiles does he like me??

Reply November 1, 2011, 4:53 pm

Hollie

Hi,
I am in a really weird situation.
I like this boy, but he has a girlfriend and his girlfriend is really over protective.
His girlfriend is really mean to me because she knows I like him.
The boy I like and the girlfriend that he is with have broken up and got back together 4 times now, which yes is really strange.
I really like this boy, but as you see the situation I am in is crazy!!!

Reply October 25, 2011, 3:47 am

v

Hi Eric!
So I like this guy in my class (we go to different schools though). He’s three years older than me, I’m 14 and he’s 17. He seems like the out going guy, because I checked out his Face Book and he has a few female friends who he…seems pretty close with. And so lately he’s been really nice and we share a couple of laughs together.
He’s been asking those ‘questions that don’t need to be asked’ and starting convos, which include “When do you start school?” and “When do your holidays start?” I asked when his last week of class was and he said that it was in a week’s time. He then added that he would be going to my school’s ‘Year 12 graduation/awards evening’ and asked “Are you coming?” …and so I’m just not really sure if he likes me or…if he’s being nice?
Thanks, much appreciated! x

Reply October 24, 2011, 8:11 am

maria

i have a crush on this kid in my fourth period, i only have him for that class. i sit across from him so we are pretty visible to each other. hes kinda the new kid and doesnt really know anyone yet, same as me. ive been single for a while and everyday this crush grows a little stronger. i once caught him looking at me from the corner of my eye, then he looked away. then when i looked at him, its like as if he went to go look at me again and then when he saw that i was looking at him, he turned away really quick and kinda smiled. but other than that, that is the only time we have ever somewhat made contact. i have also noticed that his friend sits infront of me and now he comes up every so often just to ask his friend dumb little questions. and though it may sound like something might be there, he hardly ever looks at me. anyway, i honestly dont think he likes me. it just seems as if he doesnt. and it has gotten to the point that every little thing he does that can sorta be directed to me, i overreact and get all pathetic. and its one of those classes where you dont really interact with the rest of your classmates, so its kinda hard to talk to him and i dont just want to go up to him randomly one day and seem desperate. i know i prolly sound insecure, but infact im really not. its just im starting to really like this kid and i cant seem to read him. everyone tells me to just wait, that its only the beggining of the school year. and something in my gut agrees. anyway, im basically just looking for your honest opinion. should i bother wasting my time? should i just be patient? is there something you recommend? please help!

Reply October 12, 2011, 10:09 pm

GSK

Eric! I need help!!

There is a 15 year difference between us, we’re both of very different cultures and we work together, so it’s really complicated for me.

5 months ago, I met him at a work event. Based on first impressions, he was really nice to me and tried to get to know me better, but sadly, due to the hectic workload, I didn’t manage to respond to him at the time. I thought he was a nice guy until I later heard rumours about him being a lone-wolf type that doesn’t talk much to anyone unless its work related.

After this event, we worked much more closely with each other on special projects, and I grew to respect him for his capabilities and found him more attractive by day despite having some work conflicts with him sometimes.

Then, suddenly it started, we’d have silly bantering and teasing back and forth, make silly bets (an action which is not exclusive to me, he does that with a lot of people), he’d tell people like my boss behind my back that I was great at my job (he’s in the same rank as my boss) and he’d compliment me on my looks. He said I was pretty twice, once, when I was asking him a question one on one and he ended it with “By the way, you’re very pretty today”… and then once more, in front of a lot of colleagues he jokingly told everyone that the room was filled with ugly people, except me, who was pretty. At one point, one colleague pointed out that he liked teasing me, he just shook his head and said “Yeah” in the most cutest awkward manner.Recently, he offered to make me coffee when I was sick at work, which I declined because I just felt it would be unacceptable to have someone on a boss level making coffee for me. By this point, my attraction towards him has turned to a mad obsessive crush.

I have always been able to brush this idea of “he’s into me” off, with the excuse that he’s just generally a nice sweet guy, who sees me as a cute kid.

But it has also become evident to colleagues that he sometimes lets me off easy if I have made an error or I’m particularly standoff-ish with him, he still lets it slide. In fact, if he knows I am pissed off, he tries to mend the words he said for it to sting less. To dismiss this, I explain to everyone that he still thinks I am young and has a long way to learn.

Then last week, he came over to my office for a meeting and came bearing gifts. He would usually get candies for my team to share, but this time, after passing the candies along, he came directly to me with a box… he got me merchandise from my alma mater (which he knows I am very attached to). We talked about this before, his mom lives nearby my alma mater, and since we are both out of the country, he got his mom to buy it and ship it to him so he could give it to me. It wasnt pricey but the idea that he did that blew me away. Is it possible to have a guy that sweet do something that amazing for no reason? I am both smitten yet confused.

I don’t know if I should take it as a sign that he likes me or that he’s just being nice because he’s naturally a nice guy or that he sees me as a kid.

Reply October 11, 2011, 10:58 am

Katherine

I have a big crush on this guy. He’s actually my neighbor. He’s really sweet to me and stuff like that. The problem is my friends asked him if he liked me and he said no. I’ve been taking a lot of quizzes about this and most of them say he likes me back. The thing that Is throwing me off is that he is complementing me in soccer, no one else just me. And he makes direct eye contact and smiles when I’m around. Sorry I this is too long but I need ur help! Oh yes and we also text alot and he often asks what we should talk about now signaling that he likes talking to me.

Reply October 8, 2011, 12:55 pm

kahlia

Hey,

The guy I like has a girlfriend but he seems to flirt with me alot.

He always:
-asks for high 5’s
-gets into conversations that I’m having even when he’s on the other side of the room
-pushes and teases me
-stares at me over his girlfriend’s shoulder when he’s dancing with or hugging her
-asks my friends if I’m ok when I look upset

I really don’t know what this means, can you help me?

Reply October 1, 2011, 6:12 pm

Eric Charles

I’m no rocket scientist, but…

He’s probably into you.

Reply October 1, 2011, 7:42 pm

T

Hi,
Im curious to find out if my guy friend likes me other than just a friend. It seems that I get mixed signals from him. So here goes. When we’ve gone to the club he usually does his thing and I usually do my thing but at the end of the night I usually drop him off and we chat for a bit which is nice but this isn’t what confuses me. There’s been times when we’ve gone out to watch the UFC fights and stuff and he’ll like hug me tightly then there was this one time where he brushed the hair out of my face or there’s been times where ive shown up and he seems happy to see me and insists on hugging me. Then theres times where he just seems to stare at me. But after he’s done these types of things, he seems pretty aloof after which needless to say ends up confusing me. I start to like him when he’s being sweet but then i like lose interest when he acts all indifferent. I dont know if I should bother telling him I kinda like him or just forget it.

Reply September 29, 2011, 6:48 pm

jolie

there this guy at work who I don’t know if he likes me or not but I am guessing it is the latter.
he does pretty much everything on the list and some more like: saying I love you to me whenever he asks me to do him a favor and I do it, also hugging for no reason (this happened several times). he only invites me to hang out with him when he hangs out with his group of friends and I would say no because I don’t want to hang out with a group of his friends who I never met before because I’m not good with strangers in a group hangout. also, he has my phone number but he doesn’t text/call just to say hi or w.e, he would only answer back when I text him about whatever; I rarely text him though, only about something for work. I hope my explanation makes some type of sense. Please answer back if you think he like me or not. thank you!!!!

Reply September 23, 2011, 9:20 pm

Emma

Ok i am younger then most of you, I am in 8th grade. so there this guy I REALY like I think he likes me but I am not hundred % sure that he likes me I mean we had a pencil top eraser fight in tech ed (Just me and him). He said that i am a good Clarinet player and i told him that he is a great trumpet player. I catch his glances now and then. He keeps moving closer to me in tech ed We sit next to each other now. Rereading what I have written i know he at least values our friendship but every time another girl comes around he is a completely diffrent person well not completely but ignores me i am confused if he does like me what do i do should i ask him out or wait

Reply September 16, 2011, 9:19 pm

Eric Charles

Hey Emma,
.
He might like you… I mean, he moved closer to sit near you in class, you and him have moments together.
.
He might like you a little bit… or he might like you a lot and just be shy.
.
Rather than drive yourself crazy trying to figure out if he likes you or not, be concerned with whether or not you like him.
.
If you do, your best strategy is to keep laying bait for him to get closer and closer to you… like give him an “innocent” reason to call you or to hang out… if he keeps taking the bait and taking baby steps toward you, then he definitely likes you and wants you.
.
And if he doesn’t take the bait, then nobody’s embarrassed and you guys can just be friends. And being friends with a guy can be good in itself.

Reply September 16, 2011, 10:09 pm

Kerry Shaffer

My ex and I were together for 8 and 1/2 years (off and on). We just lived together for the past 4 and 1/2. We broke up at the end of June and I moved out at the end of July. Ever since then, he continues to send me texts about dumb stuff every week or so and I never responded to any of them. Oh, by the way, he is already dating a chick 10 years younger with a 3 year old child. I am 40, he’s 37. Anyway, two days ago, he sent me a text starting with, “well, it’s been 45 days since you left”….and went on to say he hopes I found a good guy and hoping that I’m realizing I’m better off without him. He said he hopes someday we can be friends….not!!!! He said he was going to send me a message on facebook, but realized I was no longer on it and was hoping that I had learned some valuable lessons from our breakup. Meaning, I was ALWAYS on the computer and facebook and he thinks that’s why I am no longer on facebook…not the reason. Anyway, when I didn’t respond to the first message, he sent it again 5 hours later… I responded yesterday with a very nice message. Told him I am NOT looking for a good man, I am just enjoying spending time with my friends and family. Told him I was not sure if I could be friends, EVER!!! I hit send and felt SICK!!! My friends said they thought he’d “play games” and he’d wait to respond for a day or two….3 minutes later he responded….ugh!!! Bottom line, I called my phone carrier and had him blocked immediately. Please, can somebody, anybody tell me WHY he sent me a text like that if he has moved on???? I am hurting so much and am so sad about our breakup.
He keeps saying he hopes we can be friends…how can you be friends with someone that was just your lover/partner for the past 8 and 1/2 years? How can you be friends with your ex if you’ve already moved on??? I’m thinking his new chick would NOT be real thrilled. Please tell me why he is doing this…should I count my losses and move on??? I just don’t understand why he had to start the message with the EXACT number of days it has been since I moved out….ugh!!! I hope someone can help me figure this out…. Thanks in advance.

Reply September 11, 2011, 10:45 am

Monica

Well, I say I did everything and he responds. And the checklist , I put a checkmark on them all…. It’s with a close colleague who has a girlfriend..:( What do you think?

Reply September 3, 2011, 12:40 am

Eric Charles

Doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you better than his girlfriend… it happens.

Reply September 3, 2011, 10:23 am

Beth

Hey, would anyone be able to help me out? Went on 2 dates with a guy (well, the second one was just a last-minute invite to hang out with him & a few buddies). Both times he was romantic & a gentleman but made absolutely no moves — barely even kissed me on date 2 (he seemed nervous). When next weekend rolls around, I have no set-in-stone plans with him, but then I get a text from the bar asking if I want to come over & hang out. I go, but when I get there, he’s clearly pretty drunk & still drinking a beer after I arrive. I don’t know what to do, so I make out with him for a while but say up front that it’s “too soon” to go upstairs/do other stuff. He gets a little distant after that night. Eventually we have a chat & I tell him, “hey you were just drunk that night, but I am still interested in sleeping with you/seeing you again… not anything super-serious but I liked you & enjoyed hanging out with you.” He tells me (when I ask) tht he’s “not reeeally” looking for a serious relationship. I tell him “hey if you don’t want to ever hang out again, it’s not a big deal, you can just let me know we aren’t on the same page.” He said “no no, it’s just that the timing is bad right now.” He has a lot of legit things going on in life, keeping his life hectic, and I get the sense that he knows he doesn’t have what it takes to be a good boyfriend right now. But do you think he’d ever come around and want to be with me when the timing’s better?

Reply September 1, 2011, 12:02 am

Alex

Hey Eric,

I really need your help. I met this guy through a mutual friend of ours (this friend and I no longer speak) at the store. He had stopped to speak to our friend because they had known each other from years ago but he ended up talking to me about religion. He’s a Jehovah’s Witness and I didn’t know much about it and wanted to know. So I ask for his number so we can talk some more and we talk about his religion but then we talk almost every night for hours on end. I eventually decided to go to his Kingdom Hall (the place of worship for JW’s) but he said I can’t sit next to him because I’m a girl and it would look weird since we aren’t dating or anything. This was fine with me but as we continue, I notice that he just didn’t sit around me at all. I started a Bible Study with one of the women there. I told her about our long conversations at night and about one time in particular where he met me at a restaurant and we chilled for hours outside this restaurant. He walked me ot my car so I could leave and he leaned against the car and pulled me against him by my hips. I didn’t really think anything of it but after I told her, she told me that the first day I came he was talking about me coming and then when I left, he went out of his way to let everyone know I was coming back. She said that she also believes that the men in the congregation told him to calm it down with talking about me to everyone because it sounded like he liked me. But he had told me before he can’t have a girlfriend until he is baptized and he isn’t baptized yet. And I’ve asked him before if he liked me and he never said yes or no, he just kept saying he wasn’t into that because he was trying to get baptized. But I didn’t ask if he wanted to date me, I asked if he liked me and he kept saying that right now, he’s trying to get baptized so there’s no point in answering that question. This was all back in February of this year. Now, yesterday, I was talking to him and I was about to leave the restaurant we were at (he’s a server and he was my server), he thought I had said I was going to go see a movie. I said I didn’t say that, I actually just had every intention of going home and going to sleep. Then he talked about going to see a movie with his friend and he went and asked if I could go. Then he came back out into the dining room and said ‘Well, I told my friend that you asked if you could go’ and I totally didn’t say that…I actually didn’t even mention the movie. I just asked him if he needed a ride home, which he didn’t. And when I was at the restaurant, my friends that I was with kept saying they thought he liked me because when I was looking at the menu and he was explaining it, they said he kept glancing at me even though he was talking to him. And then after the movie that night (yes, I went), we stood outside for about 3 hours just talking about stuff. Then I took his hat, playfully, and he chased after me for it. He’d put his arms around me to try to get it back and he pushed me against my car to get it. Then there was one point where he was behind me and he leaned on my back with his arm and basically made me bend over so I’m standing at a 90 degree angle and he’s leaning over me to get the hat. Also, I’m going on a diet and I asked him if he thought I was fat. I didn’t really think anything of it, I ask everyone that question, at work, my friends, at school, my family. So I asked him because I knew he’d tell me the truth but he said ‘thats a bad question to ask’, apparently because no matter what answer he gives, I wouldn’t believe him. Which…wasn’t true…but whatever, he said I wasn’t. And I noticed when I told him that my dad didn’t like when I wore shorts, he made it a point to say ‘I don’t know if they were too short, I wasn’t looking’. I asked him if it would have been ok if his niece was wearing the same shorts, then he said he wasn’t looking. And he hugged me like 6 or 7 times before we finally parted ways.

So…does he like me or not? I understand he can’t date me for religious purposes but right now, all I’m concerned with is whether or not he likes me.

Reply August 17, 2011, 1:40 pm

gee

I need help too! So, I’m a single mom and just moved to a new apartment in May and my neighbor is a carpenter and making shelves for my daughter’s room. (He is also single & has kids). Whenever we talk, he seems to be flirty and into conversation with me and I’ve been interested so I recently asked him to hang out sometime. At first he said that he wasn’t sure & things in his life have just been crazy and indefinitely not getting better and anyone trying to get their life together should probably stay away from him, etc (his ex gives him a hard time about everything). So after responding with that I said that if it was me he could just say no, there would be no hard feelings …in which he then said, you know what why not, yes. What does this mean?? Is he into it or not?

Reply August 15, 2011, 10:18 pm

sarah

i just started talking to this guy about two weeks ago now, we work together…he told me i have pretty eyes, im pretty, im mad cool, a fun person to hang with.. he even paid for me on our date at the movies. the first date was at a fair and he asked for my number at work that day and we went on rides and had agood time..the second date was the movies and i laid on his shoulder and we hada good time, he paid for it all..walked me to my door and NO KISS…then we hung out at the mall a few days ago and when he left..NO KISS, just hugs…he said he likes me when i asked but idont know..thing is im always texting him first and it makes me think he dont like me..but once itext him we text for hours.. what does anyone think???

Reply August 4, 2011, 10:07 pm

Alissa Knight

I think you have got the same situation your in except he has been friends with me since 5th grade and now i am in 7th grade i dont know how but i think i am in love with him already and his name i braden he has blue eyes that sparkle that you would be lucky if he looked at you and you get this amazing feeling and you get goosebumps i love him so much i just dont know how to say it i think he likes me to because he always stares at me please ill answer if you answer me please i think he likes me i just dont want to ask him out because i dont know if he really likes me!

Reply March 19, 2012, 9:40 pm

eda

there’s this boy i like and he is a cholo and lots of other girls like him whats one way to ask him out and one way to figure out if he has felling for yuh too!! i meed him on Wednesday and that same day i told him what i feel about him and he reasponed like if he did like me i just wanna make sure he do so i can ask him out

Reply July 22, 2011, 9:07 am

Laurita

hello!
So there is this boy I am really interested in. We started to hang out since the 4th of July and everything has been smooth in a way. Well on our second hang out we went out to the mall and ate and afterwards we went back to his home to kill time because we wanted to catch a movie. While we were waiting around for the movie we were listening to music chilling and talking. I dropped a couple hints that i wanted to hold his hand and we did, but he started to touch me in my arms and legs (which I did not mind.) Afterwards he invited me to his room to lay down and talk (which I was fine with.) So we were laying down talking on his bed and well he started to touch me in my tummy and so on. I kind of asked him if he was trying to turn me on and he laughed and said no. but i told him that i did not mind it at all (but I told him I was looking for a boyfriend, he said he wasn’t.) so yeah there was no sex involved because I am saving that for a special someone (though he DID want to do it, I did not allow it.) We then saw each other the next day at his best friends party and we were inseparable that his friends kept smiling at us. We went out to my car and talked inside because it was chilly and there were too many people at the party that we couldn’t hear ourselves. He again wanted to mess around but I didn’t let him. So when we hung out again the same scenario from last time at his house happened but this time I didn’t even allow him to mess with me, making out and cuddling was all good for me. We still continue to hang out (matter of fact I was just with him lol) but now we just watch movies and talk about him and me (only once he used my belly as a pillow, which I think is cute.) but anyways what I am trying to ask since its been like 2 weeks that we have hung out, I want to ask him if he likes me. I already asked him if he finds me boring and he said no because he is the one who always asks me to hang out. I really want to ask him if he likes me though, or I simply want to tell him I like him. I am kind of scared of doing so because I am scared of what he will say especially when he told me he doesn’t want a gf (and he is in my town for the summer so he will be back in the city for school which isn’t so far from me.) I am not really used to these kinds of things. and I rarely like some boys. so picky.

btw his friends told me to play hard to get, and told me not to be easy. they told me this after we messed around. do you think there might be a way to actually initiate a relationship in the future? oh and he is also a really popular guy with girls.

when we were messing around he told me I was cute and that he liked my unique style, and that he is rarely interested in hispanic girls. which I also find weird about myself because I rarely like hispanic boys.

(sorry for the lack of punctuation and whatnot I was kinda in a hurry lol)

Reply July 19, 2011, 4:40 am

Paige

P.S.
I prolly should have added this but we hugged twice but I went to him he didn’t come to me. And I almost alwayd caught him staring at me. I have no clue why he would like me because I’m awkward and I don’t think I’m pretty and were almost complete oppisites so idk thanks agian
-Paige :P

Reply June 20, 2011, 12:20 am

Paige

Hey I’m pagie and I’m 15 years old. I just went to a camp last week and I met a guy there and I don’t know if he really likes me or if it was just a camp crush. I never really talked to him but just hey and school stuff because we don’t go to the same school. But one night he came up to me and asked if I would go out with him and I said maybe. I got his number and I’ve texted him a few times and were going to an amusment park together with friends next week. When ever I text him he never sends smiles or hahas but I think that’s just how he is. I don’t want things to move to quickly but I also don’t wants things to come to a stand still. He’s super cute and I like him but he isn’t making to much of an effort to continue to ask me out. Maybe I pushed him away. I hope not :( please help
thanks -Paige

Reply June 20, 2011, 12:17 am

Terribly Confused

Hi, there’s this boy,of course, i have a feeling that he likes me but, I really don’t know. He talks to all the other girls more than he talks to me. He sometimes pops up around me and starts the conversation. Sometimes he initiates the conversation or I do. He comes across the room to tell me something unneccesary, for example, “Do you have a pencil ?”. We also shared this moment, just staring at each other, smiling for a few minutes. We also always stare at each other during a conversation, complete eye-contact. His pupils are huge. He also tends to look at me and sometimes when i catch him in the act he look away or keep the glance. I know these are sure-fire signs, but he still won’t do anything. Thank you for reading and please help me.

Reply June 19, 2011, 8:44 pm

elise

good advice… but i think you have the wrong idea of what a feminist is.

Reply June 11, 2011, 10:21 pm

Eric Charles

I went back and reread that line and I don’t like how it came across so I took it out. It came off sounding anti-feminist, which wasn’t my intention or message at all.

Reply June 12, 2011, 12:08 am

Karen

Hi Eric Charles. Would you please tell me if this guy likes me or I’m just seeing things, since I have lack of experience? There is a guy, he and I work in the same place but different sections, at the begining, when he just started to talk to me, he always tried to make me smile,(since I don’t do that a lot, at all), he talks to me rarely, and I think sometimes he is looking for something into the section I work in, also everytime he sees me,(for the first time of the day), he smiles at me, but recently he hasn’t done that; so this is me asking you if is there any little chance that he likes me or he is just being nice or I’m just a desperate 26 years old woman who doesn’t even know what is a kiss, I’m just tired of see my colleagues/friends getting engaged/married, getting pregnant and still I have no one in my life. I am starting to believe that NOT everybody has a match, as in fiding the significant other. We almost never talk, so is it safe to say that he is not into me? and that, is he just being nice right?

Reply April 2, 2011, 1:36 am

JC

Hi Eric,

First and foremost let me tell you I love how your advice is so real and informative. Next, I think I am getting a strange vibe from a new co-worker at my office. I invited him out as a friend after work one day becasue I thought I could give him some tips on the ins and out of the office (not gossip), just who to go to for help, corporate culture and unspoken rules in the office. He and I went together to college (he says he remembers me but, I can’t say the same)and I thought he might need a mentor in the office until he is comfortable.

I will say we hit it off very well as friends and we were both open about having a girlfriend/boyfriend. Nevertheless he has been giving strong signals he is developing other feelings. He hangs up on his GF to join me for lunch ( I never invite him over), stares into my eyes for long periods of time – basicly doesn’t break eye contact unless I do. Is always slightly bragging about his toys, sports abilities and financial stability and has since asked me out to dinner. I will add when we did go out to dinner I had to remind him his GF was waiting for him and it was late – 3 times, I ended up telling him I had to leave.

Still nothing more than just 2 people getting to be good friends becasue they get along. Here is where things start getting strange – he brings his GF over to the office becasue she wants to meet me. On one occasion we carpool for lunch to a restaurant close by to meet the rest of the office and I happen to touch his arm because he had a scar I asked about and his whole body gets goose bumps and he gets very serious about it’s not funny that I gave him goose bumps. That coupled with comments like ” I was just thinking what you said” “You are so like me it’s scary” “you are so refreshing” “I’ve never met anyone like you before” followed by quiet moments and funny looks, this is makeing me wonder.

Last strange thing that happened was we were gonig out for a quick drink after work and when he calls his GF to tell her she basicly gives him some lame story about it’s windy outside and she is worried about him driving with high winds so he should leave immediately home (we are in California. I kind of figured it was probably me so I was cool about it and told him I apologized if I sent the wrong vibes but, I would never disrespect her that way. Which is true I don’t date guys who aren’t single never have and never will. Anyway, I had to pry the truth out of him because he was at first lying to me by saying he had a problem at a rental house, that his car was acting funny but, after I made him relax he tells me it’s his GF and the wind story. Next he invites me over to his house to hang out the next day becasue he wants to show me his motorcycle and other stuff becasue he can’t come into the office the next day. I had to be a little blunt and told him we didn’t know each other well enough for me to be comfortable comeing over to his place (especially after what just had happened).

Next day (his day off) there he is in the office but, doesn’t talk to me just walks by my office several times. Since then I am cool about things by always saying hello and continue to be friendly and professional with him. We didn’t talk for a couple of days after that until I was working over in his area talking to another engineer about an urgent project that came up when he comes over to where we were and blurts out “I like my GF because she doesn’t like to shop”. Needless to say the other eng & I looked at each other a little funny because it was out of nowhere. It was a bit awkward so I walked with him over to his desk and he tells me how he is not really trying to get to know me and he is very happy that his GF doesn’t like to shop and how they like to do the same things. All the while I am telling him thats great but, I’m trying to change the topic to current events becasue, frankly it sounds more like he trying to convince himself.

Am I reading too much into this? I do like this guy and had never thought about him in that way until this started to happen. Of course now I’m just slightly perplexed because of the last incident – I mean he just told me he likes his GF. So right now I am totally being friendly and professional with him but, don’t know what I should do if he asks me out again. I don’t feel I can go out with him as friends if I am starting to think of him in a different way and stay true to my boundries. BTW – in one of our long conversations he confessed he has only had 3 GF (1 in HS, another that only lasted 1 month then this chick who is 6 yrs older than him).

Reply March 30, 2011, 2:45 pm

Cracky

Hi Eric,
Please do help me out with this situation, its literally driving me insane-
My brother got engaged and the girl’s brother is kinda cute and I’m definitely interested in him. He took my number from his sis and started texting me . He shares his problems and all with me and has also told me about his ex girlfriends and his past relationships. I know this is what someone does when u consider the other person as your friend but I’ve a feeling like it is something more than friendship or maybe I’m just seeing what I wanna see.
He appears to be too interested in my personal life and seems to be way too protective about me. Is it because I’m his friend/ would be relative or is there something more to it? He texts me almost all the time and sometimes he also calls up just to say hi or makes some excuse for calling up. When we meet up, he appears too shy and doesn’t speak much (or maybe he’s just dumb!).
The problem is I really really like him and want to get into a relationship with him(as desperate as it may sound) but he never seems to confess his feelings at all. I haven’t told him him anthing about my feelings either but I first wanna be sure if he is interested or not.
On one hand he acts like he is interested in me as well but on the other he never says anything. Its driving me crazy.
Please tell me if he is into me or or am I just assuming things. And either way how can I get him to ask me out ?

Reply March 2, 2011, 5:31 pm

Cracky

Hi Eric,
Please do help me out with this situation, its literally driving me insane-
My brother got engaged and the girl’s brother is kinda cute and I’m definitely interested in him. He took my number from his sis and started texting me . He shares his problems and all with me and has also told me about his ex girlfriends and his past relationships. I know this is what someone does when u consider the other person as your friend but I’ve a feeling like it is something more than friendship or maybe I’m just seeing what I wanna see.
He appears to be too interested in my personal life and seems to be way too protective about me. Is it because I’m his friend/ would be relative or is there something more to it? He texts me almost all the time and sometimes he also calls up just to say hi or makes some excuse for calling up. When we meet up, he appears too shy and doesn’t speak much (or maybe he’s just dumb!).
The problem is I really really like him and want to get into a relationship with him(as desperate as it may sound) but he never seems to confess his feelings at all. I haven’t told him him anthing about my feelings either but I first wanna be sure if he is interested or not.
On one hand he acts like he is interested in me as well but on the other he never says anything. Its driving me crazy…
Please tell me if he is into me or or am I just assuming things. And either way how can I get him to ask me out ?

Reply March 2, 2011, 5:30 pm

Britt

Eric:
i reallyreally likethis guy and we kissed just the other week but now he doesnt text me even though he thought i tasted good and wants to kiss me again we are not going out but i want to and im so confused about him all he does is tease me and make sexual remarks what do i do and does it sound like he likes me because i am so confused he has acted like this since forever and i play along just because he is funn please help

Reply January 13, 2011, 8:26 pm

Eric Charles

Glad you caught my drift. :)
.
I will be blunt here: if you are hot enough, a guy will put up with anything. And if you are cool enough, a guy will put up with anything. So where you can be hot… be hot. And be as cool about everything as possible.
.
I wouldn’t mind dating a single mom if she was hot, had her life handled and was a cool person. If you strive to be the best possible version of yourself in the dating world, being a single mom won’t hold you back.

Reply December 24, 2010, 1:40 pm

kyla

Good advice! Thanks..I like how u implied ur all famous “needing” remark. Made me laugh. Just one more thing though, what’s guys point of view of dating a single mom? His father and I are cooland he takes care of his son. I’m not looking for a daddy, and I make that clear.

Reply December 24, 2010, 12:51 pm

Eric Charles

No. Don’t act like you don’t care. Stop obsessing about him and fill your time other things – the problem here isn’t that you need to manipulate him better… it’s that you need to stop obsessively focusing on him and trying to figure him out. Just focus somewhere else and stop “needing” to figure him out.

Reply December 24, 2010, 12:19 pm

kyla

Eric:
Is it a good idea to act like you don care and your to cool..when first seeing a guy non-exclusively? Even if he knows your playing that game? I need a good game plan for a very confusing guy..who does half the I’m Into signs, and the other half not Interested. I can usually read guys but not him.

Reply December 24, 2010, 1:46 am

Chris

I’ve been in a similar situation for about 8 months now with a co-worker. I’ve been going crazy, looking up silly horoscopes, advice articles, etc. This is the best piece of advice I’ve come across. Thank you so much.

Reply August 21, 2009, 11:14 pm

Ms. Rose

Wow. You totally hit this one on the head. I am currently going through this situation in my current ‘relationship’ however over time when trust gets built all this comes as a piece of cake!

Reply April 28, 2009, 9:11 am

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