“I’m so afraid of losing something I love, that I refuse to love anything.” – Jonathan Safran Foer
Love can make you feel like you are invincible. Every clichéd love song suddenly rings true with a new meaning. Food tastes better, sunsets are prettier. You’re so full of sweetness that you’re tempted to lavish it on strangers just because you want to spread that blissful feeling. It’s the same for men as it is for women, we also love being in love!
Where there is a potential for great reward, there tends to also be a great risk. Love is probably the best and the scariest thing we do. That potential for rejection and devastation can make it really challenging to truly let yourself fall for someone.
Saying the phrase “I love you” is just that – a phrase. They are beautiful words, but they don’t create a binding contract. Hearing those words is not always enough to make you rest easy in your relationship. And some guys just might not be so comfortable saying them, even if it’s how he feels. Other guys may be too comfortable saying those words, even when they aren’t quite in that state.
Words are just words. There’s more to the story, which is why it’s important to know how guys behave and what they do when they truly love a woman.
Take The Quiz: Does He Really Love You?
Here are some signs that your man is in love with you and in it for the long haul:
1. He fully respects you.
Real respect is a profound thing. It is a base upon which you can build a stable relationship with a genuine understanding of each other and your values. There’s also a version that is more shallow, where only certain parts of you are appreciated, or where that “respect” can be turned on when it is useful.
You want to be with a man who knows you inside and out. One who wants to protect everything it is that makes you who you are. Instead of trying to change your opinions or bend your boundaries, he will celebrate all aspects of your personality. When he does, you know he holds you in high esteem.
This kind of quiet but powerful respect can have a wonderfully positive effect on your whole life.
2. You fully trust him.
Trust is a crazily treasured commodity because it is something that has to be built. You can look at someone and instantly think they are attractive, or even immediately take a liking to them. But you can never automatically trust somebody.
Earning trust is a vital component in building any other part of the relationship. Without it, everything is shaky and ready to collapse.
Having honest faith in a guy doesn’t just mean you believe he isn’t going to cheat on or lie to you. It means you’re confident that he will be there when you need him. It means you feel safe in opening up to him, in sharing your deepest fears and insecurities. He’s not going to throw a confession back at you in an argument, or tell someone out of spite.
You know that, at the end of the day, he’s got your back.
This hard-earned quality can only be created out of hard work and passion. If you have a truly trusting relationship with your man, you can be sure he has fully invested in you.
3. He loves a lot about you.
Everybody has their own quirks, ones they may not even realize are weird. Sometimes when you spend a good deal of time with someone, they notice these and point them out to you. If this is done in a snarky way, chances are you are not well-matched.
But when a guy takes the time to notice the things that make you “you,” and they make him like you even more, then you really have something special.
We naturally see everything from our own perspective, even our own selves. He may even see you more clearly than you see yourself. He sees your strengths, your potential, and all the wonderful things that make you who you are. Now it’s not all a shiny bed of roses, he also sees your flaws. But when a man loves you, he doesn’t use those flaws against you or make you feel ashamed. He embraces them as being a part of who you are.
4. He shows loving actions.
Telling somebody something is never as effective as showing them the same thing. This is certainly true regarding love. Would you rather be told “I love you,” or be made to feel it? Men are typically very action oriented. Our actions really tell the full story.
Some guys have a hard time expressing how they feel in a conversation. Fortunately, there are other ways he can make his feelings known to you. Take note of where you rank in his priorities. When he walks in the door, does he acknowledge you before doing anything else?
Is he attentive to how you’re feeling at any given moment? Does he show affection regularly, even with something as simple as a squeeze of your fingers? There are a million little ways to show tenderness and affection.
Look for these more unique and actionable ways that he may be showing you he loves you.
5. You’re his partner in crime.
He is not your boss or a dictator. He is your partner, your equal, and he treats you as such. Your opinion is just as valid as his, and he lets you know that. This doesn’t mean that you guys are never going to disagree. It just means that when you do, it will be a discussion between two equals. Neither of you will consider yourself the superior being or patronize the other.
Having a partner to bounce ideas off of and go on adventures with is a real gift. Healthy communication where both parties feel heard and well-regarded makes for a quality relationship. If you’re at this phase of a relationship, know that your man values you in the same way you do him.
6. You are a part of him.
Occasionally, couples get mocked by their friends for transforming into a “we.” For example – “we” are going to the grocery store, or “we” like onion rings. While it can be entertaining to point out the mild codependency between two people, there’s something really sweet about two people fusing together and flourishing as a pair.
It takes a wildly healthy and well-functioning relationship for two people to be able to happily spend copious amounts of time with each other. Undoubtedly there will be bumps in the road and challenges to overcome, but being able to face them confidently together makes them less intimidating.
When your presence has been weaved throughout every part of his life, he won’t want you going anywhere. If he can’t imagine life without you, it means you’re ingrained into the essence of who he is. This is not a passing fancy. It’s a heavy commitment that should be appreciated.
7. He makes you a priority.
We’re all guilty of saying that we don’t have time for something when the reality is that it isn’t a priority for us. Instead of going to the gym, maybe you spent a little too much time on social media and decided you’d better just get started on whipping up dinner instead. You’ll always find excuses for why something that isn’t that vital to you can’t be done.
However, you’ll never neglect a person who is significant to you. The people who are important to you know it. They feel it. You always make yourself available to them when they really need you.
Naturally, this is true for a man in love. He will make you his number one priority. If for some reason there’s a day where you can’t come first, it will be for a very good reason. In addition, he’ll make sure you’re okay with not coming first before he commits to it. The point is, men, and people in general, make time for the things that matter.
8. He loves being with you.
When you’re with the right person, something as mundane as watching TV suddenly becomes more attractive than the most exciting party you’ve ever attended. Trivial things like grocery shopping are now a blast. You’ll look for any excuse to be around that person because being with them (no matter what you’re doing) is always the best option.
If a person goes from living a wild, single life to being in a loving relationship like this, the difference can be quite remarkable. Love can come from out of nowhere and change the way you live your life.
If your man seems excited at the mere idea of being in your presence, he’s hooked. He doesn’t need anything fancy or extra on top of the treat that is being with you.
9. He doesn’t give up.
Being with a man who seems like he might have one foot out the door is stressful and unsustainable. A guy who threatens to break up at the first sign of trouble is not a good candidate for a long-term relationship. A guy in love will be in it.
This kind of man will look at a problem as an opportunity to grow and mature with you, not as a roadblock to your future. Instead of throwing up his hands in defeat, he’ll restate his intention to be with you and figure out how to get past the issue.
When you’re with a man who makes you feel secure in that way, you’re able to offer the same devotion in return. That mutual respect and commitment make for an inspiring and empowering relationship.
I hope this article gave you clarity on what a man in love looks like. One last thing to keep in mind is that there’s a crucial period in your relationship that will determine if you and he end up together, or if the relationship falls apart. At some point, he may withdraw. It might seem like he’s losing interest and he may suddenly need space. Do you know how to handle it when he does this? If not, you will probably make one of the major mistakes that most women make that can irreparably destroy your relationship. Read this now so you don’t risk losing him forever: If He’s Pulling Away, Do This...
Another turning point in the relationship will come when he asks himself: Do I want to spend my life with this woman? The fate of your relationship lies in the answer to that question. Do you know how men decide if this is a woman they want to commit to? If not you need to read this next: The #1 Things Men Desire in a Woman
Take The Quiz: Does He Really Love You?
This is Exactly How to Know If Your Man Truly Loves You:
- He fully respects you.
- You fully trust him.
- He loves a lot about you.
- He shows loving actions.
- You’re his partner in crime.
- You are a part of him.
- He makes you a priority.
- He loves being with you.
- He doesn’t give up.