This topic contains 38 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Hs 1 year, 2 months ago.
May 21, 2016 at 9:37 pm #533643
Hi, I want to know if, in your experiences, Scorpio men normally start a relationship with sex rather quickly and then bond with a woman this way? Then progress into a relationship? In most situations I have been in with other men, we were friends first and I didn’t sleep with them for about a month or two.
I am dating a new Scorpio and it looks like all he thinks about is sex. I joked about this with him and said I would sign him up for a sex anonymous group. He had a raving fit and did not speak to me for days! I was only kidding and trying to have fun!
Has anyone ever heard of a Scorpio going through the normal courting process – dating, getting to know you – then putting the move on you sexually?May 21, 2016 at 9:41 pm #533646
Interesting, all this Scorpio men talk…
Astrology is bunk… BUT – Run Run Away from Scorpio man!May 21, 2016 at 9:42 pm #533647
This isn’t an astrology site, not sure why you are asking?May 21, 2016 at 9:57 pm #533653
More talk about Scorpios!
First off, a man is pretty much a man whatever his star sign. All the same rules apply and I really think you’re going to see more differences based on other things such as religion and culture than his star sign.
But based on the classic idea of a scorpio, they are usually very sexual and sensual, so sex is an important driver for them. Saying that,my 2 scorpio relationships started out like any other. We went on dates, got to know each other and sex was no more or less important than with anyone else.
Did your guy tell you why he had a fit when you mentioned this? I would imagine either because he is only focused on sex and you found him out (the fit was a way of deflecting attention from that) or he felt hurt and misunderstood.May 21, 2016 at 10:31 pm #533675
sounds like you hit a nerve… which probably (not definitely) means you were correct. If he’s not being respectful and he is more sexual than most men you’ve met, then either you’ve only been meeting strange men, or this scorpio guy has a bit of a sex addiction.
It’s hard to say from such a small amount of info but based only on what you’ve written, my guess is that he does have some sexual addiction problems and that was a little too true for him to take on… I’d cut my losses and move on. It doesn’t sound like he was respecting your boundaries around sex.May 21, 2016 at 10:37 pm #533678
Any male who starts the convo with sex is not worth your time…
There are exceptions, BUT more casualties than exceptions…
How strong are you?May 21, 2016 at 10:59 pm #533687
In which way do you mean strong? Strong enough to endure, walk away?
He is always keen to do sexting, and may even watch porn but I am not certain. He uses some pretty graphic sexual language at times. In the bedroom he is not anything spectacular. Hardly any foreplay. Just rips off your clothes, goes into oral (which I hate) then lies on his back with eyes closed. I ask him if he is asleep or what? He says no but I am never sure what he wants. I am assuming he wants to be “serviced” but all he does is lie there quietly. He is very, very passive and doesn’t talk much between the sheets.
So if a guy is talking lots of sex with you in the relationship, he is just using you? Or can it be that he is a very sensual man with a high sex drive – in which case I don’t consider that necessarily to be a psychological problem.
I am at my wits end trying to figure this guy out!\May 21, 2016 at 11:02 pm #533689
Strong enough to walk away…May 21, 2016 at 11:06 pm #533692
It doesn’t sound like he is a sensual man, from what you’ve just described.
He’s not good in bed, he’s rude and vulgar and he freaks out and disappears if you have a disagreement. What exactly are you getting out of this relationship?May 21, 2016 at 11:14 pm #533696
You haven’t told us why he had that fit?
He’s not sounding like a great catch so far…May 21, 2016 at 11:33 pm #533700
It is not entirely clear why he had the fit. All he said was “I was not impressed with your statement”, nothing more. Then there was silent treatment for several days afterward.
I am having doubts about the relationship and seriously considering leaving. Wanted some opinions regarding his behavior as sometimes we can all blow stuff out of proportion. I have hung around because I feel “sorry” for him, that he is such a mess. He will have to heal on his own. I am not going to become Florence Nightingale.May 21, 2016 at 11:44 pm #533702
Please do not start down the road of co-dependence …May 21, 2016 at 11:55 pm #533703
yeah, do NOT ever stay with someone because you feel sorry for him… first, you are not doing him any favors. You’re reinforcing that he is too pathetic to live without you. That is not empowering or respectful. Secondly, he is not ever going to appreciate it. He will not appreciate the many years of your life you’d sacrifice, having lame sex and putting up with his disrespectful behaviour. Staying with someone you don’t respect (you can’t simultaneously respect a person and feel sorry for them) is only going to lower your value. Then you’ll end up abandoned by a man who was never good enough for you in the first place… believe me, enough of us have been there, done that. I can tell you from experience it is a recipe for hopelessness and it’s not going to do anything positive for either of you. The best way to help a man is to respect him. Men need respect, far more than they need love. And if you don’t respect him enough to be your partner (understandably, he sounds yucky) then at least respect him enough to have faith in his ability to function without you. That’s also a way of respecting yourself… and if you don’t respect yourself, nobody will do it for you.
Hugs and hope that wasn’t too harsh. Tough love, I wasted years on guys like the one you’re with. Nothing but pain and wasted youth and beauty to show for it. Get out while you can and learn how to attract healthier men whom you can respectMay 22, 2016 at 6:58 am #533736
Every man I have ever met is totally interested in sex…mature men hide it better.
Look, the key is how you are treated…with dignity and respect or not. That is what to look for.May 22, 2016 at 10:38 am #533769
I don’t do Scorpio anything. They are aggressive, think they are more powerful etc. I dated a guy who was a Scorpio and yes it was all about sex. Stupid me!
What sign are you?May 22, 2016 at 1:51 pm #533940
Aries here. Quite correct now that I think about it – that men in general are interested in sex, not just Scorpios in particular. Seems to me Scorpios guys are over the top more obsessed with sex. It has just been my experience so far. Other guys I have dated have not been this extreme.
I have learned that if a guy is wishy washy with you, it means either he is not sure of you or afraid of getting too close to a woman period. Who has time to stick around for years while they figure it out.
Regarding feeling sorry for him – yes it is not a good foundation to pursue a relationship with someone. Felt sorry for him because he always seems so troubled about something – upset or brooding.May 22, 2016 at 3:01 pm #533961
I agree with Raven. Astrology is not science. It’s entertainment, and mostly nonsense. I think it’s silly to base any relationship or serious life decisions on.
Gauge each relationship and each situation in life based on the facts, and behaviors, in front of you. What does it matter what sign someone is. I don’t care if it means they are predisposed to certain traits, what does that really matter?
Look at how they treat you and how they treat others, and most importantly pay attention to how someone acts when difficulties and challenges arise. That’s when you get to see what they are truly made of.
If a guy is inconsistent, insincere, rude, uninterested, boring, arrogant or misogynistic (just naming a few traits I find offensive) move on. Or he only talks about sex with you, and tries to get in your pants, then he is only out for sex.
All men want sex (unless they are an eunuch or asexual). But a gentlemen or a guy who is interested in more than sex and getting to know you, actually gets to know you. Mind boggling, huh?
Just keep your eyes and ears open and watch how they behave. That’s the best insight into anyone’s character. Because if they are a liar or something other than they seem, over time the mask always falls off.May 22, 2016 at 3:04 pm #533962
Which is why we keep advocating for going slow and getting to know someone before getting too involved. And definitely keep sex off the table if you tend to bond, or get hurt easily after getting intimate (if you are seeking a relationship and not a booty call or FWB).May 22, 2016 at 3:14 pm #533966
But to answer your question about your guy, a man who is sensual is sensual about everything. All kinds of touch are very important to them, and food is also something they find sensual that they are usually passionate about, In fact, I’d define a sensual person as someone who is very passionate and tactile in general.
You guy does not sound sensual at all to me. He actually sounds emotionally unavailable (or distant), glaringly out of touch of what you want and need in the bedroom (a sensual man can read and interpret what pleases a woman), and very immature and a poor communicator.
Why would you want to be with someone you pity or feel sorry for. Just hearing that is a huge turnoff.May 22, 2016 at 4:29 pm #533988
Well over the years I have felt people should be perfect but that left me alone alot. Now I know you can still care about someone despite their flaws. After all I am not perfect. I still expect friends etc will accept me despite my imperfections.
I see him as a man with flaws but am trying to understand people rather than judge. See all the posts about how much of a loser he is. Perhaps I should just look at him as a human being like the rest of us.
It doesn’t mean sticking around to be abused.May 22, 2016 at 5:47 pm #534010
You can respect another person as a fellow human, and accept we all have flaws. Yes,none of us is perfect. We should not expect perfection of anyone, but that does not mean we don’t have standards.
In fact without standards we accept anything and everything. Not me.
You can have compassion for someone, but that doesn’t mean you need to date them or have them in your life.May 22, 2016 at 6:21 pm #534021
A man’s astrological sign tells you one thing about him: a time frame for when his parents had sex to conceive him. That’s it.May 22, 2016 at 6:29 pm #534024
Haha exactlyMay 22, 2016 at 8:11 pm #534031
Our astrological signs do play into our behavior. Our personalities are based on birth, childhood and society conditions. There is no if ands or buts about it. So, yes, with the comments that men rely on having sex, yes, that is true. But his communication style can be influenced by the Scorpio description. They are very harsh with their expectations, will discredit you very quickly if they are questioned and they demand a lot. I don’t interact well with Scorpios being a Virgo / Libra. Aries are very social and love being around people. They have a lot of friends and treat their friends with the utmost respect and support. Good for you.May 22, 2016 at 8:32 pm #534036
You need to find a balance between perfection and so flawed he’s not fun to be with!
So this guy is passive aggressive, doesn’t communicate and his life is a mess, in addition to bad in bed, sex obsessed and someone that has weird fits?! He really isn’t sounding like a catch now!
It’s very true that all men are interested in sex but some are only interested in it! I think if a man is real interested in YOU, he will want to get to know as much about you as possible and he’ll also want you to know him. What you both enjoy, your past life experiences, what makes you both tick, etc. That doesn’t leave a lot of time to talk about sex. If that’s his main topic of conversation, he’s not interested in getting to know you on a deeper level.
I agree with Philly this man isn’t sensual. My husband (a scorpio!) is and it’s definitely not all about sex. He loves any form of touching. I must say he does adore to lie back and have a massage or me to do the work sexually at times, but he’s not selfish or passive in the bedroom. Could your man have got into bad sexual habits with an ex? If so you’ll have to retrain him!
But it doesn’t sound like a good relationship. You want a life partner, not someone to look after and who is a mess! What if you need someone to lean on at times in the future? Would this guy be there to support you? I doubt it!
I also don’t understand how you can accept him going silent and not address it when he came back? I would want to know why and for him to know that behaviour isn’t acceptable.