Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › We aren’t progressing and I’m thinking bout ending it
- This topic has 3 replies and was last updated 2 weeks, 4 days ago by Raven.
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Lottie
Hello everyone. I’ve been dating a guy for two months almost exactly. We talk on the phone and text every day. He initiates most of the time. We see each other 1-2 times each week. But here’s the thing: we don’t ever hang out on weekends because he always seems to have plans and I’ve twice now extended invitations to him to events with my friends so he can meet them and he’s declined both. He’s not invited me to meet his friends or to go with him to events he’s filled his weekends with. For the last 3 weeks our dates have been home dates so he isn’t even taking me out anymore and the real kicker – I am the first person he has dated since his divorce many many MANY years ago so he’s told me he feels he should be dating other people too – BUT ISNT! He’s twice now been offended by things I’ve said to him that he’s taken COMPLETELY the wrong way. When he told me he thinks he should be dating others I continued dating others as well because obviously. But then if he asks me about it and I’m honest he gets mad at me. He’s said he feels he can’t go out with others because he’ll “feel like he’s cheating” on me and recently told me he “wasn’t supposed to meet (me) on day 1” and he’s “scared.” He said it feels like he’s known me forever and it’s “not normal.” And two months in and we aren’t even social media friends. Anyway, the lack of dates, the rejecting offers to meet my friends, the fact that he’s altogether stopped taking me out on dates where we are actually doing something other than hanging at his watching sports or movies and his constantly booking up his weekends has me feeling like a placeholder and unimportant. I think I need to look out for number one now and tell him this is over. Thoughts?
GaiaRun! Get out of this relationship and go and start dating people who want to be with you. You are a placeholder. He told you that you were by saying he wants to date other people.
Know you are worth so much more than this. There is no need to argue with him or convince him of your worth. The right person would not treat you like this. Between 3 and 4 months is usually when a relationship either starts heading somewhere deeper or ends for various reasons. Some men know whether the person they are dating is going to be a placeholder, long term girlfriend or wife material right away. So it might end sooner. This guy sounds like he’s basically keeping you around until he finds better and will totally manipulate you by getting mad when you keep dating even though that’s what he wanted.
Find a better man.
AngieBabyNever, ever be the first woman a newly divorced man dates. Odds are too high against it working out.
This man isn’t relationship ready, not even close. Throw this one back. Two month is enough, you’ve seen what you needed to see to make a decision.
RavenHe’s hiding something…
Does he come to your place, or are You doing all of the work? -
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