December 13, 2015 at 8:13 pm #487288
I worked with a guy for 3 years. We got close and became really good friends. Just recently we started sleeping with each other but he has an Ex girlfriend he hasn’t quite let go.I feel like it’s a thing of she’s been around so long that letting her go is a scary thing for him. Is any real relationship with him doomed already? I feel like he enjoys our time together. He texts me everyday and goes out of his way to help me with random things done. He tells me his plans and I really feel like we have a connection. Other people have said it to me, that we have this vibe with each other that can be felt, that it’s obvious.December 13, 2015 at 8:14 pm #487289
I’ve been in this online relationship with a guy in Cali and I live in Ohio. We met twice he calls us one step above casual we text everyday but I have to plan it if I call him. I think he has another out there or is playing me. I have feelings but he barely shares his tells me I’m suppose to get that from his actions. How do I get myself to stop loving him and walk away. This obviously is not a good relationship but every time I try to leave he talks me into staying and I give in. I’m getting to the point where I tell him how I feel about it but I don’t get much response from him. He was the first one that flirted with me after my divorceDecember 13, 2015 at 8:14 pm #487290
What do you do if a man won’t commit?December 13, 2015 at 8:14 pm #487291
I have been dating a man for about 6 weeks .we hit it off with chemistry right off the bat. We had sex about a week ago and he didn’t text or call after 2 days after I decided to reach out. We ended up going Christmas shopping and he had a gift for me waiting after we went shopping. I am just concerned about him not making another date right away. My friends tell me he is just inexperienced. I am suffering from getting attached and feel really nervous although he is buying me gifts and doing nice things for me. I think I just need to chill and withdraw.December 13, 2015 at 8:14 pm #487293
I have gotten so much useful information from subscribing to your emails! So helpful! Thank you. My question/situation: 2 + years, living together, decided to separate so we got our own space, still seeing one another and it’s great! but he will pull the no contact card out without notice If I text him a compliment. (There’s more to it than just a compliment but he deserves it!, he try’s to tell me he thinks I’m still in love with him, who gives a damn? That’s none of his business! Haha) it’s driving me crazy! It never lasts long a few hours, a day at most, I give his space because I need it too. How do I tell him that if I am making him feel like a winner it isn’t fair for me to feel like I’m not winning when he pulls that card?December 13, 2015 at 8:14 pm #487294
I go on lots of dates but I do not find many guys attractive. I have discovered that for me to feel chemistry he needs to be at least 6 and not skinny. Is this being to picky? It seems very superficial but I have tried to like smaller men but the chemistry will just not develope. Can I change what attracts me?December 13, 2015 at 8:14 pm #487295
Hi Eric and Sabrina,
My guy doesn’t want a relationship and is afraid of marriage. We are in a 24 hour long distance
“relationship” for more than 2 years!! We used to work together before that and got to know each other only for 5-6 months but no dating till the last month . Then I changed Job (which I had planned before but he didn’t know till that last month). I am in my late 20s. I will move to a place 4 hours from him in 1 month. I both do like each other and have been honest throughout as far as I know. I am also going through some career changes . I do see the potential in this guy but should I stay or just focus on myself and leave this “relationship”.December 13, 2015 at 8:14 pm #487296
I had this “friend”. He kept telling me he didnt want a relationship but always wanted me around. We had fun at times but it was mostly about him. So it got to the point I couldnt do it anymore and he was bringing me down… then I started to get to know God and started learning how to pray for things. I asked God to remove him because I wasnt strong enough to let him go myself and he did. Lift your hands up and ask God how to handle your situation. Literally surrender and just watch and tell him to take control. God is like the father with a gun… if its meant to work God will work on the man you are praying about to make it work. If the man is not meant for you then he will remove him. Don’t go chasing what God has removed from your life. God doesnt make mistakes.December 13, 2015 at 8:14 pm #487297
I am in school working on my degree and I met this guy who is really sweet, gentlemanly and we have a good time together. There are a couple of issues. Some superficial and some are not. The predominant issue is what he is studying in school he doesn’t actually have an affinity for and I don’t know if I can support him in a career that he will not be successful in… He also seems to be moving a little fast like stating that he wants me in his life for a long time etc. only after a few days of knowing each other and he just now went cold. No contact for a few days and I’m not sure how I feel about it because there are so many deal breakers in place already, but I still kind of like him. Thoughts?December 13, 2015 at 8:14 pm #487298
How should I have responded to a guy who sent texts such as “I really want to see you again this week, but I’m kinda busy every night and then go out of town this weekend;” “I was going to see if you wanted to do something tonight, but I got stuck at work;” “We should do XYZ soon;” “I have been busy with work lately but I want to hang out again if that’s ok with you.” All of these were without me prompting him, however I did indicate my interest in seeing him again when he was free.
For the record, we never ended up getting together a second time. It ended up being a five week, texting pointlessly every day thing (him initiating more than half the time). Not sure what it was about, but it ended with me getting frustrated with the situation (which caused him to stop texting me).December 13, 2015 at 8:14 pm #487299
Hi! I am in a LDR with someone who is 8 hours away. He and I started datin in September (met on eHarmony) – he referred to our phone conversation as a date (I didn’t think about that) but we talked basically every other day by text and calls in the beginning. At 6 weeks, we met halfway from where we both lived IRL, hit it off with amazing chemistry and ended up sleeping together. He was still pretty sweet to me when we returned to our homes but within days of meeting IRL, I misunderstood something he said and had a bit of a freak out. I realized that I overthought everything but could tell he was pissed at me. I tried apologizing but he didn’t contact me as much – just texting every few days to check in with me and call me once a week. It has been a month like this. I figured he just needed time and space so I gave it to him.
Now I think I have inadvertently set a standard with him because he now only calls me once a week and rarely texts me anymore. He still seems to want to talk to me and be with me sexually (and every once in a while that old spark comes back…the chemistry is still there) but I would like a way to encourage him to text me again the way we used to. He must still be interested in me because we have made plans to see each other at Christmas, but I just wish he would go back to involving me in his life more. Is there some way I can do that without having to outward mention that I don’t feel he is connecting with me as much as he used to before the misunderstanding and how I can encourage him to reconnect with me even somewhat the way we used to?December 13, 2015 at 8:15 pm #487300
This guy showed interest and was texting me but then I jumped the gun and invited him to study with me but he never responded. I’m now being scarce and not contacting him or anything.
Is there anything I can do to re-inspire his interest? Any tips would be great thanks!December 13, 2015 at 8:15 pm #487301
i met a divorce man w two kids. He is always busy with his kids, work and sport training. He also always cancel our date even if it is only a one hour lunch date. I only get to see him like 1 hour lunch a week or some time 2 hour after work in 3-4 weeks. The time we spend together is really little and as he cancel more and more often he also reduce his text because he claim busy. When I push him he said I am impatient and I keep pushing. He is a future talker and he tends to talk about a lot of things we might possibly do in the future, but with the amount of time we spend together I think that will only happen 2 years later and I don’t have the time for that. His text is always short and no feeling, hard to communicate using text. And he sheild his thing and what he do most of the time as he is very private so many time he avoid most of the question. It is hard to get him to share as he is someone who need to earn his trust but how to earn when text is not working and I don’t get to see him. It’s tiring. When the ex wife is in town for treatment he have someone to talk to at home he text lesser and meet even lesser.December 13, 2015 at 8:15 pm #487303
Okay so my ex bf broke up almost 7 months ago and he’s now dating a new girl, I’ve had on and off conversations with him and from what I can get from it is that he finds me really annoying, his partner says that he did handle bad situations with me pretty poorly and somewhat apologizes for it, is it even possible that he still likes me? Do you still think I have a chance?December 13, 2015 at 8:15 pm #487304
I dated a guy who seems very confused. We dated and had amazing chemistry in and our of the bedroom, but eventually had to end it. He moved away because he was training to be in the army, so he didn’t want to be in a relationship. After evaluating the situation, I was fine with that. I was prepared to never speak to him again. But on the day that he was leaving, as we hugged goodbye, he said to me to contact him as he will have his current number for awhile still.
After several days, I decided to see how he was doing. And we sort of continued texting from there, almost every week, at least once or twice. About a month and a half later, I needed to know what he was thinking, he gave me his new number and would continue to text me, but never seemed to have much interest in how my life is doing. So I brought up how I was feeling and that’s when he told me that he feels like I may not be his “forever match”. He said that he’s not sure if that is how he really feels as he under a lot of stress but he likes me a lot and thinks I’m really sweet. I said my “goodbye” and stopped speaking to him, I deserve better than that.
Am I being too harsh?December 13, 2015 at 8:15 pm #487305
My boyfriend/fiance lives in the southwest, me in the Midwest. WE met on a dating website 18 months ago and he was working in my area at the time. Now, he is back home and working but his job takes him where ever the hail storms hit. He was married once and it was a very bad marriage and an even worse divorce. He swore he would never marry again. I am the first he has ever considered marrying since his divorce 5 years ago. He is still very scared about the prospect. He has two kids, 12 and 4…mine are all grown. He says he WILL marry me but give him some time, but when I bring up the subject or want to talk about moving there to NM to be with him, he says he doesn’t know when or that talking about it gives him a headache. He tells me he loves me every day and he calls/texts me first thing every morning and checks up on me throughout the day. So how should I be handling him to get him to really want to talk about our future and see the importance to getting things rolling. I fly to see him all the time and he has driven here 3 times to spend time with me. Im baffled!December 13, 2015 at 8:15 pm #487306
Hi Eric/Sabrina, What makes a guy like a girl enough to ask her out? What are some signs he wants to ask her out?December 13, 2015 at 8:15 pm #487308
Hi Eric and Sabrina – thanks for hosting this. Does the NC rule work for a LDR breakup where the relationship was one year long distance but only two weeks face to face (but over three trips)? He lives in Asia and I in the US. Can we maintain contact without going into the friend zone? He knows that I am moving to Asia in a few months and I hope we can reconnect and try to start over then. Thanks!December 13, 2015 at 8:16 pm #487309
Sould we have audio with this?December 13, 2015 at 8:16 pm #487310
I have been seeing someone for about a few months. I finally gave him access to my bed and it was great. He continued to peruse me. He went out of state for two weeks, he came back and we reconnected, telling me again how much he likes me, thinks about me all the time, too old and doesn’t want to waste time any more. We talked about a relationship together. I texted him mid week just to say hi, he replied a short reply, I sent one more just to ask if he was out of town for work this week, then never replied back to me. This was a week ago. I haven’t budged on messaging back but this is so weird and unlike him. What happened?December 13, 2015 at 8:16 pm #487311
I was recently dating this guy for the past five months. Things were going good, except the occasional ignoring my calls when he went home to visit his family. I moved to another city and would come back to visit him on weekends. The last time I seen him we had a great time together, but after that weekend he just started ignoring my calls and texts for about a week. He would then call out of the blue and act as everything is fine. I then decided to stop contacting him and move on. He then started calling and texting me weekly, “just to check on me.”
I would just like to know what was up with the check ins after we suddenly just started ignoring each other?December 13, 2015 at 8:16 pm #487312
Me and this guy have been dating and he told me he loved me. Every morning as soon as he woke up from work he would shoot me a gm text. He was very sweet and charming. One day I got upset and I flipped out on him and told him I wanted to just be done. I regret it now and when I try to talk to him he ignores me. I haven’t spoken to him in a week? Could he be done ?December 13, 2015 at 8:16 pm #487313
If it is about “winning” with men, is cheating inevitable? Meaning, the thrill of the hunt/conquering by being with different women? Also, is “losing” for some men mean being with someone who is sick?December 13, 2015 at 8:17 pm #487314
I met a guy through an online dating site at the beginning of September. He lives about 2 hours away driving distance, so it’s a long distance relationship. We’ve been casually dating/ talking and we’re both introverts. We’ve been very sexually active, but he seems to be very sweet and gentleman-like. He says he doesn’t usually let anyone know his business and he doesn’t talk to a lot of people often, but we’re on the phone 2-3 times a week for about 2 hours each time. We always say we need to stop, but we’re having active conversations. After 3 months, I casually told him I think of him as more than just a friend and he didn’t respond for a few days- then when he did he said he was sorry and he got nervous that I was giving him an ultimatum, then he realized I was just vocalizing how I felt. He said he likes where we are for now because he’s not sure when he’ll be ready for a relationship again, but that he feels relationships require always feeling like you’re emotionally and financially drained because you always have to perform because that’s how things were with his ex. I actually feel like he’s doing great as is and he puts in a lot of effort. I asked him why he puts in so much effort if he’s not ready. He said he might accidentally be misleading because he’s trying to be nice. Should I bother thinking it will go anywhere? Is he trying to tell me he’s nervous or he just doesn’t want a relationship with me? I think we should take more time getting to know one another for a few more months, but I don’t want to put in effort into a possible dating relationship if it’s not going anywhere. I can’t tell right now because he’s been so sweet, thoughtful, and caring. Thanks!!December 13, 2015 at 8:17 pm #487315
I made a mistake a big one a few months ago. I hurt a a guy friend. I tried to apologise but they felt I was insincere. He told me to never contact him. I felt very lost sad and anxious for several months. I feel like in my heart I tried and I think I’m finally ready to just let it be and move on. I’ve done a lot of soul searching and growing but wondering if reaching out would be ok. Not sure what to do? Should I just let him be or try to fix things?
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