Ask A Guy: Is This Guy A Gentleman Or A Desparate Loser? post image

My roommate met this guy at a bar a week ago. the first date, he took her to Gramercy Tavern (one of the nicest restaurants in New York City). Last night was their second date and he took her to another equally nice restaurant. Before their second date, he had some of his friends meet her and he tells her how much he likes her every other sentence.. When she got home, she was getting concerned that this guy was a desperate loser because he was exposing all way too soon. Tonight, he came over and when I came out of my room I saw a HUGE vase of a dozen roses that he brought her. Now my roommate is convinced that he can’t get a date and probably wants to marry her next. He’s also in his 30s, a lawyer, and looking to buy a place or probably settle down. She likes him but she thinks he has no game and too much strong feelings too soon is creeping her out. What do you think? Are we just cynical and can’t appreciate a gentleman taking us out or does this guy really have signs of desperate loser?

See our guy’s response after the jump! [continue reading…]

Ask A Guy: Am I Right Or Am I Nitpicking? post image

I don’t know if it’s my personality or what not, I tend to nitpick a lot with my boyfriends, either because I really am like that or because they are not ideal for me. This was a big problem in my last relationship, which ended really badly. After, I told myself that I would never get into another relationship where I end up nit-picking or feeling unsure of whether or not I should be with him. Anyway, I’ve been seeing this new guy who really loves me and is the epitome of an ideal boyfriend. BUT,- there always has to be a catch- there are certain things I don’t like about him. I think I can overlook it, but I am extremely scared that we will end up badly just like my past relationships because I can still find things I don’t like about him. So what should I do? Do you think I have emotional baggage? I don’t want to break it off because I love him, but I am thinking, should I find someone that I can’t nitpick with so I will never be this confused?

Read out guy’s response after the jump! [continue reading…]

I have been friends with this guy for months- he’s really funny and makes me laugh. When I first met him he was all over my friend and trying to have sex with her. She now has a boyfriend and he started acting the same way with me. He always says how beautiful I am and how happy I make him and is always telling me how much he loves my personality and how much he wants me.

Does he mean it or is he just trying to have sex with me too?

See our guy’s response after the jump! [continue reading…]

Ask A Guy: Is He Committed To Me? post image

I recently started dating a guy who sometimes works night shifts and sometimes day shifts. When he works the day shifts I see him every day, but when working night shifts, we only have time on weekends which means I don’t see him at all during the week. Anyway, when Friday comes along he chooses to go out with his friends rather than being with me and I’m really confused because he always tells me that he loves me.

He also suggested that we buy each other rings as a symbol of commitment to one another. I told him I will think about it since we have only been dating for two months but I now I’m don’t think it’s a good idea to buy the rings, especially if he can choose to go out drinking with his friends over spending time with me.

I just don’t know how to tell him that I think it’s a bad idea since he hasn’t shown he’s really committed to me. What should I do?

See our guy’s response after the jump! [continue reading…]

Ask A Guy: Why Did He Vanish? post image

I recently met a guy out of the country and I thought we hit it off. I visit the country often and plan to return in a few months. I hung out with him the last 2 days before I left so I didn’t get to spend that much time with him. The last time I saw him we discussed him coming to visit me as long as I got time off from work. And it was all his idea to come visit me not me. We also said that we would keep in touch through messenger. FYI- he and his ex girlfriend (first and only girlfriend) were together for 6 years and they broke up last year in March. According to his family (we met through our families), she treated him really badly and controlled his every move. She took advantage of his niceness. He also briefly told me about her and she sounded a bit psycho, but I believe they still keep in touch.

It’s been 2 weeks and I haven’t heard from him. I texted him last week and never heard back. I also emailed him a few days ago and included a pic we took and I still haven’t heard from him. I’m no longer going to bother making my effort because he obviously isn’t but what do you think happened???

Read our guy’s response after the jump! [continue reading…]

Ask A Guy: Is He ‘Just Not That Into Me?’ post image

I met this guy online about two years ago. Everything was amazing at first and we dated for a month before he left for medical school. For that whole month, we saw each other almost every day and he said he really liked me and I was everything he was looking for and all the stuff guys say in the beginning when they really like a girl. After that month he left for medical school in Nevada (I live in California), making it a long distance relationship.

We tried to keep it together at first, I even flew out there one weekend, but he ended up sending me a long email telling me that he just couldn’t handle a relationship at that time because he had just started medical school and he was dealing with a lot. I didn’t talk to him for about six months after that. For the last two years we have been talking off and on but never actually got back together. Recently, we started talking again, but just as friends. About a month ago he confessed that he’d had a girlfriend for the last 6 months and she just broke up with him and he was really upset.

I gave him advice and I was there for him as a friend, trying to make him feel better, all the while still having feelings for him and wanting him to like me. I finally decided to tell him that I wanted a relationship and nothing else and if he didn’t want the same thing I couldn’t handle being friends with him and to not call me again.

Read on for the rest of this question and our guy’s response! [continue reading…]

Ask A Guy: Am I Too Old To Have A ‘Friend With Benefits?’ post image

As I enter deeper into my twenties, any time I’m around family or friends (that I do not communicate with on the regular), I get the question, “Are you seeing anyone?” And I never really know how to answer. For a while I’ve been “seeing” this guy who is absolutely lovely, but isn’t my boyfriend. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want him to be my boyfriend. We are just friends who get along great and are sexually attracted to each other. I just don’t want a relationship right now and I think he feels the same I like my weekends open to go out with my girlfriends or whatever comes my way.

While I do like this “thing” I have going on, I get the feeling that people look down upon girls who have friends with benefits. Even though I’m not going out and picking up guys every night, I still get the feeling that people think I’m doing something wrong. I don’t really want to give up the deal I have right now, but I don’t want to have to lie to my friends about who I’m going out with. Am I being promiscuous? Am I too old to have a friend with benefits? What do I do?

See our guy’s response after the jump! [continue reading…]

Ask A Guy: Does My Boyfriend Really Mean What He Says? post image

My boyfriend and I have been going out for about three months now. We’ve already had sex and I think we took it way too fast.  He says he wants to be with me forever and that he loves me- I mean, could see us being like that but does he really mean it or is he just saying what he thinks I want to hear?

He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me, but sometimes he won’t call or text the whole day. It makes me feel unloved but I don’t know how to let him know that without him getting mad. He’s like “Oh yeah, I’ll text you tomorrow.” Then he doesn’t! It makes me angry but I don’t want to be like “Why didn’t you text me?!?”

How do I know if he really means what he’s saying or if he’s full of it? 


[continue reading…]

Introducing: Ask a Guy Feature post image

Introducing: Ask a Guy Feature

I’ve done it, you’ve done it, all of our friends have done it, and it’s pretty safe to say that it is a common practice among women around the world. Of course, I’m talking about the hours spent dissecting, analyzing, hypothesizing, and trying with all of our might to understand why men act the way they do. Men seem to greatly enjoy playing it ignorant and innocent, but trust me, they know what they’re doing and there is always a reason (and no, it isn’t always because ‘he’s just not that into you’).

I’ve definitely had my ups and downs in the love-department and my experiences have taught me that when you need a shoulder to cry on, round up your girl friends and when you need answers, ask a guy. It can be difficult to find the right guy to solicit for advice (again, it comes down to that ignorant and innocent thing). Fortunately, my blog partner is not only a straight guy (and a very attractive one at that), he is an expert on relationships and will be making your lives better and brighter by answering all of your burning questions.

If the guy you’re seeing, or dating, or in a relationship with is doing something that you just can’t understand, don’t drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out- just join the A New Mode newsletter and we’ll answer your burning questions (and send you daily game-changing relationship tips too).

We will post the questions and answers weekly (don’t worry, we’ll keep you anonymous) or maybe a few days per week more depending on how shady the men in your life have been acting!

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