Articles by Sabrina Alexis


5 “Desperate Girl” Signals That Turn Guys Off: Signs of a Needy Woman post image

Let’s talk about how you might unintentionally be pushing guys away and turning them off by acting too desperate and needy.

I’m sure you have the best intentions. But as they say, the road to hell is paved with good intentions.

No one ever wants to be the desperate girl, but if that’s the place you’re coming from, then it will come across in your actions.

MORE: 5 Things Every Man Wants in a Woman

I know this might sound harsh, but I won’t be doing you any favors by placating you and encouraging bad behavior. It’s not only that- this needy behavior most likely isn’t the true essence of you you are … it’s a reaction to things you’ve been through. So in this article, I’m hoping to strip that away so you can be your authentic self.

You may not even realize that your actions are coming off as desperate, because some of these signs are subtle, which is why I’m going to set the record straight so keep reading.


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Take The Quiz: Is He Losing Interest?

Click here to take our quick (and shockingly accurate) “Is He Losing Interest” Quiz right now and find out if he’s really losing interest in you...

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Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship: When You’re Dating a Toxic Person post image

Let’s talk about toxic people …

Here’s the thing about dating a toxic person, or even being friends with a toxic person, they very rarely start out toxic. Or at least, that’s not how they present themselves in the beginning.

If you’re in this situation I feel for you because I know first hand how hard it is. You want it to work with this guy, you see a lot of good in him… but something just doesn’t feel right. You don’t like the way you feel in this relationship. And he’s pretty awful to you.

MORE: The Number 1 Signs of a Toxic Relationship

In the beginning, he was so enraptured by you. He was so sweet and so into you- and now it seems like everything you do is wrong and you’re the source of all his problems.

But maybe you’re just being sensitive or paranoid. Is it really you or is he a toxic person? Keep reading to find out.


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Take This Quiz And Find Out Right Now: Are You In A Toxic Relationship?

Click here to take our quick (and shockingly accurate) “Are You In A Toxic Relationship” Quiz right now and find out if your relationship is toxic (and what to do about it)…

Does he blame you for his own negative emotions/moods (which then causes you to walk on eggshells because he might be upset)?
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Getting Ghosted: How to Deal with Ghosting post image

Let’s talk about how to handle being ghosted. Oof. This one hurts. And we’ve all been there. And if you haven’t been there yet, it’s coming!

My favorite ghosting story happened with this guy I’ll call James. We had been seeing each other for a few months and I really liked him, but then he vanished without a trace. But he did resurface a few weeks later … and I remember seeing his name appear on my phone and just feeling so happy and relieved to be hearing from him again. I forgave for ghosting me even before I heard the apology! But he wasn’t calling to apologize. He wasn’t even calling me … he accidentally called me thinking he was calling some new girl he was dating or hooking up with. He hung up on me as soon as he realized and I never heard from him again, ever. 

MORE: Why Guys Disappear and How to Deal

Whenever I discuss this topic, it generates a strong emotional reaction. And I fully understand it. It seems immature, it seems childish, and it’s just so disrespectful. And how can you not take it personally? He didn’t even care about you enough to tell you he no longer wants to see you? So did he ever even care about you in the first place?

You just feel so hurt and you feel like such a fool. What were you missing? How did you not see this coming? And how can you ever trust guys after this?

So let’s talk about how to make the experience slightly less awful. I’ll try to give you some perspective on why guys “ghost” and how you can move on without feeling bitter and jaded so keep reading.

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5 Clearest Signs He Wants a Serious Relationship with You post image

The biggest area where women feel lost or confused in the realm of dating and relationships is in understanding a man’s true intentions.

It’s easy to be misled, or to feel like we’ve been misled when our emotions are attached to a situation. You want things to work out … and you may want it so badly that you can’t see the truth about your relationship.

MORE: Signs He’s Serious About You

I know what it’s like to be stuck in a confusing “situationship.” It feels like he really likes you, but the terms of your relationship are unclear or undefined and you just don’t know if you’re wasting your time or energy.

In this article, I’m going to clear everything up and tell you exactly how to know if he has pure intentions and if he truly wants a serious relationship with you.

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What to Do When He Says He’s Not Ready For a Relationship post image

Let’s talk about what to do when a guy tells you he doesn’t want to be in a relationship or he can’t be in a relationship or he doesn’t like labels, or whatever the case may be!

If you’re going through this, I feel for you because I’ve been through this sort of thing many times and it really hurts.

MORE: 11 Definite Signs He Doesn’t Like You I always say it’s much harder to get over the guys who were never your boyfriend than to get over an actual breakup because the fact that he doesn’t even want to try is just so much more painful. You see how great you guys could be together … why doesn’t he?

I’m going to help you understand what’s going on and how to respond so keep reading.

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5 Signs He Likes You But Doesn’t Want a Relationship post image

If you’re a regular reader of A New Mode then you know our main mantra when it comes to deciphering how a man feels: when a guy likes you, it’s obvious!

OK … so then why does it get so confusing? Why are so many women feeling confused and despondent because they have no idea where he stands?

The confusion comes when a guy likes you … but doesn’t like you enough. When he likes you … but he doesn’t want a relationship with you. Ouch. 

MORE: 11 Undeniable Signs He Doesn’t Like You

This is where everyone gets stuck. You don’t want to let go because he does like you, and you like him, and it would be foolish to let go of a guy you like or even love! But at the same time, you are not getting what you want. You aren’t really getting anything from him … you’re holding onto the potential of what could be.

So how do you know what’s really going on? I’m going to break it all down so keep reading.

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How Do You Know You’re Not In Love? Signs You Weren’t Actually in Love post image

I get a lot of questions from you guys that sound something like this: My boyfriend or my ex or the guy I want to be my boyfriend is not nice to me, he ignores me, he’s disrespectful, he blocked my number, or he’s cheating on me or I just found out he has a wife … but I want him back and I want to make it work, what can I do?

Now I’ll usually respond by saying something like: “That sounds awful, why do you want to be in a relationship with someone like that?” And the answer always is … because I love him.

MORE: Proven Signs You’re In Love

Or I’ll get messages from women saying they can’t stop obsessing over this one guy and can’t move on. So I’ll ask, “what’s stopping you from moving on?” The answer … because I love him.

Ladies — or gentleman, because this applies to you too — this is not what love looks like or feels like!

To clear things up, I’m going to tell you the signs you were never in love, even though you thought you were.

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What A Man Is Thinking When He Ignores You  (Psychology of Ignoring Someone) post image

Let’s talk about why a guy you’re seeing or are in a relationship with is suddenly ignoring you.

Here is how it usually goes: the relationship gets off to a great start, you text and talk on the phone and hang out and it seems like this is going somewhere, and just as you’re settling in and enjoying the bliss of being in a blossoming relationship, he abruptly pulls back.

He may fade away slowly or just completely ignore you or “ghost,” and you have no idea what you did to cause this.

MORE: 5 Steps to Stop a Man From Withdrawing

There is nothing more frustrating than not knowing where you stand with someone. If he doesn’t like you, fine, that hurts but you can move on. When you’re stuck in this gray zone it makes you crazy and sends your brain into overdrive.

The human mind doesn’t like not knowing so we spin and spin hoping to come to some sort of conclusion. All that spinning gets you nowhere, it just makes you dizzy and even more off-kilter.

Don’t worry, I’m going to break it all down so keep reading.

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How To Make a Man Chase You: 6 Ways to Get Him Hooked post image

Let’s talk about a common term that gets flung around in the realm of relationship advice: the chase.

The chase isn’t about playing games or following rules or manipulating a man into wanting to be with you. If you go about it like that, you will always lose.

Why is it important for a man to chase you? Well, it goes back to basic biology. Men are hunters, it’s in a man’s nature to want to pursue… and unfortunately, a lot of women have taken that away from him by going after him hard… which actually only succeeds in scaring him away.

MORE: How to Make a Man Chase You Without Playing Games 

Maybe going after things aggressively has served you in other areas of your life, maybe it got you where you are in your career, but it won’t help you attract and keep a high-quality guy.

The chase is what gets a man to pursue you. Pursuing you leads to investing in you and this is what causes him to really fall for you.

This is how it’s done.

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How to Know He Thinks About You a Lot (16 Signs You Are on His Mind) post image

I get a lot of questions from women wanting to know how their guy feels and if he’s thinking about her.

Men aren’t always so easy to read, if they were, I wouldn’t have this job!

When you don’t know how a man feels about you it can drive you crazy- you feel insecure and unsure of how much to put into the relationship. You’re worried about being blindsided and ending up broken-hearted.

MORE: Does He Care About Me? 16 Signs That Guarantee He Really Does

When you like a guy and you’re thinking about him all the time, you want to know if he feels the same. Sometimes you may want it so badly that you see things that aren’t even there!

I’m here to help and I’m going to share my researched and proven ways to know if a guy is thinking about you a lot.

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He Hasn’t Texted Me in 3 Days! What To Do When a Guy Doesn’t Text You post image

You’ve been seeing this guy and everything seemed to be going great until … he goes a few days (or more) without texting you.

The panic steadily rolls in like an ominous storm. Everything seemed to be going so well, what happened?? Did you say something wrong? Did you do something to turn him off? Is he dead in a ditch somewhere? Why isn’t he texting me?!

Ask a Guy: Why Hasn’t He Texted me in 2 Days?

It is the worst feeling. You just feel completely at his mercy. You spend your days just waiting from some sign of life from him. Every time your phone dings your heart lurches out of your chest (and then it sinks back to the pit of your stomach if the message is not from him…).

You feel anxious and on edge. You just want to know what happened to cause this and if you’ll ever hear from him again.

Keep reading because I’m going to break it all down for you.

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20 Questions to Ask a Guy You Like to Get Closer post image

In this age of endless connection, we are more disconnected than ever and most relationships don’t go very far beyond the surface. Maybe it’s because we hold ourselves back or maybe it’s because we no longer have the tools to genuinely connect, like face-to-face and via conversation.

In order to build the foundation for a relationship, you need to create a meaningful connection, and this comes when you truly connect with who the other person is.

A little while back, I discovered this site called Thought Questions and I started keeping a list of some of my favorites. When my husband and I were still dating, I pulled up the list one night and suggested we play the “questions game.” We also mixed it up by seeing if we could guess what the other person would answer. It was a lot of fun, but also a very profound experience and we ended up learning so much about each other (and about ourselves!), which brought us even closer. To this day we make an effort to spend time asking each other deep, meaningful questions that go beyond ‘how was your day?’ And every time we do this, we discover new and interesting things about each other.

MORE: 225+ Amazing Questions to Ask a Guy

In his book “The Seven Principles of Making a Marriage Work,” famed relationship researcher John Gottman (the dude who can predict whether a couple will get divorced with something like 95% accuracy after watching them interact for only a few minutes) cites “enhancing your love maps” as the first principle. A love map is essentially knowing all relevant information about your partner’s life, from small things like the name of their first pet to big things like significant experiences that shaped who they are. He explains that couples who have detailed love maps of each other’s worlds are much more equipped to cope with stressful events and overcome conflict.

The point is, knowledge is power and asking the right questions can unlock the gates for a meaningful connection and deep understanding of one another. It doesn’t matter what stage of a relationship you’re in, it could be the first date or your 10th year of marriage, people are deep and complex and always evolving so there is always something new to learn.

To help you tap into the power of knowing, here is a list of my favorite bonding questions to ask your guy in order to get even closer and more connected.

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How to Make Him Afraid of Losing You: 8 Ways to Get Through to Him post image

Let’s talk about how to make a man fear losing you and why this is important in a relationship.

Here is what a lot of women do – as soon as a guy comes along who shows a little bit of interest she latches on forcefully. She abandons all other options, she deletes her dating apps, and commits herself exclusively to him even though he hasn’t shown anywhere close to that level of commitment or investment in her.

MORE: How to Make a Man Chase You Without Playing Games

He knows that she’s just there, he knows that he can continue this “non-relationship” indefinitely. So why would be want to change things? He’s getting all the benefits of having a girlfriend without any of the responsibility. He knows she’s all in and he has no reason or motivation to change so the relationship doesn’t develop or go anywhere.

In order to get a guy to step it up, he needs to be afraid of losing you. This isn’t about being manipulative, it’s about knowing your worth and knowing that you’ll walk away if something isn’t what you want.

I’m going to tell you exactly how to do it.

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10 Telltale Signs He’s Losing Interest In You post image

You know the feeling… it’s that palpable shift that you can’t quite put your finger on, it just hangs in the air sending waves of panic throughout your being. Sometimes you think you’re imagining things… that your insecurities and fears are acting up, and things go back to business as usual.

And just as you’re breathing that delicious sigh of relief, the panic reemerges and jabs you right between the ribs. Something is up, you don’t want to admit it, but you know it.

They say advice is what you ask for when you already know the answer, but wish you didn’t, and I most certainly agree! I get flooded with desperate questions from women wanting to know if their guy is losing interest.

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How to Effortlessly Hook a Guy and Keep Him Interested In You post image

Meeting an amazing guy you connect with who likes you as much as you like him is a really special thing. And just when you’re riding that wave of “wow, this is so amazing,” the panic may start to set in and have you wondering: what if he loses interest?

MORE: 8 Scientifically Proven Ways to Get a Guy to Like You

For a long chunk of time, I was great at getting the guy, but not so great at keeping him. That’s because it wasn’t coming from an authentic place. I was great at creating the illusion that I was a confident, fun, secure, happy woman, but inside I wasn’t. And that’s what you need in order to not only attract but keep, a quality man.

Read on to find out how it’s done.

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8 Scientifically Proven Ways to Make Him Fall for You (Guaranteed!) post image

How to Get a Guy to Like You, Make Him Want You, and Fall In Love With You

Love may feel magical, mysterious, and inexplicable, but it isn’t as random as it seems—there’s actually hard science behind it.

This is why we feel instantly drawn to some people but couldn’t care less for others. Why some people hold our interest after that initial attraction, while others don’t. There is a science behind attraction and what causes us to not only be attracted to someone, but to continue to feel strongly for them.

MORE: 5 Steps to Make A Man Fall In Love

Yes, a lot of the time things flow so naturally it’s hard to imagine there are real, rational, concrete things going on behind the scenes causing those butterflies, and that is how relationships should feel. You should never force a relationship, and you can’t make someone feel a certain way if they just don’t … but you may be able to tip the scale in your favor and help Cupid along by doing certain things that will increase his attraction to you and keep him interested.

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How to Text a Guy You Like: Get His Attention and Keep Him Interested post image

There is nothing more exhilarating and terrifying than texting a guy you like.

The stakes feel really high and you want to make sure you’re making the right impression while also being authentic and true to who you are.

The pressure is understandable. Texting is our main mode of communication, and it can be a make or break in a relationship. And a lot can get lost in translation. The wrong text can cause a guy to lose interest or think you’re desperate when you’re not. And the right text can make him go from lukewarm to super interested.

MORE: How to Know If a Guy Likes You For Sure

To help you out, I’m going to tell you exactly what to text a guy to make him more attracted to you … as well as what you should never text a guy!

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Can You Stop Loving Someone? How to Let Go When He Doesn’t Love You Back post image

Being in a situation where you like or love a guy and he just doesn’t feel the same way is the worst.

I’ve been there, I know how deeply it hurts. Why doesn’t he just want you the way you want him? It’s hard not to feel like you’re just not good enough.

MORE: How to Get Over a Guy Who Doesn’t Like You

It’s hard not to take it personally. It’s hard not to feel like you’re somehow defective, or like you’re the architect for your own misery by doing something that just repels any many you have feelings for. You’re not sure what it is about you, but it must be something.

Don’t worry. I’m going to break it all down and tell you exactly how to get over these situations with your self-esteem fully intact.

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Why a Man Won’t Emotionally Commit (and What To Do About It) post image

You’re seeing a guy… but he just won’t emotionally commit. Ouch.

This is usually how it unfolds. You’ve been dating for a little while, the momentum is strong, things seem to really be driving along in the right direction … but then it stops. He starts to pull away and withdraw and you feel like you’re losing him.

Is he a commitment-phobe? Did he lose interest in you? Did you push him away? Why won’t he commit, and what can you do to get things back on track?

MORE: Why Do Men Pull Away – 3 Main Reasons

It’s a devastating feeling. You can’t help but blame yourself. You must have done something to cause this. You go through all the possibilities in your mind and come up empty and meanwhile, he’s slipping further away. What happened?

I’m going to break down exactly why a man won’t emotionally commit and what you should do about it.

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What Guys Want but Won’t Ask For: (Things Guys Secretly Want You to Do) post image

Men aren’t always the best at communicating—he may not always be aware of what it is he needs until he gets it.

Women are more accustomed to talking about their emotions and needs, so a woman who trusts in herself and the relationship enough to ask her guy what he wants, or communicate gently what she needs, can be a godsend.

More: 5 Things Guys Secretly What (But Will Never Tell You)

A guy generally won’t ask for what he needs because a lot of the time, he doesn’t even know what it is. But then when you give it to him, it feels amazing. He feels appreciated and loved, and he comes to love you even more.

And with that, here are 11 things he definitely wants that you can give him, and everyone makes you happier, too.

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Will He Ever Come Back to Me If I Let Him Go? post image

They say if you love something set it free, if it comes back it was meant to be. But is this really true? Also … what if it doesn’t come back?

After a breakup, especially one where you were broken up with, it’s natural to be consumed with feelings of wanting to get that person back. And while you may be tempted to call or text them, or even better, see them … this won’t work. If someone lets you go, you have to let them. This is also the way to ultimately get him back.

MORE: How to Get Your Ex Back in 5 Steps (With Testimonials) 

But backing off and leaving him alone doesn’t work in a vacuum. It’s about what you’re doing while you back off and leaving him alone that will determine if you can get the relationship back on track.

Now, this doesn’t just apply to a breakup. This also works if you’re in a relationship and your guy is taking space or pulling away. It’s all about gracefully backing away and leaving him alone, and how you utilize this time, that will make all the difference.

Let’s dive in a little deeper.

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Why Isn’t He Texting Me? 5 Reasons A Guy Doesn’t Text Back post image

Texting is the primary mode of communication in these modern times so it makes sense that one of the most popular relationship questions we get have to do with a guy’s texting habits, or lack thereof.

The most common question of all is this: Why isn’t he texting me?

MORE: The True Reasons Guys Don’t Text Back (And What to Do About It) 

We’ve been getting variations of that question for a solid decade now with no signs of slowing down. To help clear up some of the confusion, I’m going to break down the five main reasons a guy isn’t texting you back. If you’re not hearing from him, it’s most likely for one of these reasons.

I’ll also tell you exactly what to do to guarantee he never leaves you hanging so read until the end. [continue reading…]

8 Texts to Make Any Man Obsess Over You post image

Texting plays a massive role when it comes to dating and relationships. It’s pretty much our main mode of communication and can be a make or break in terms of getting a relationship off the ground.

A text can send the wrong impression and cause a guy to be turned off … or it can have a huge impact causing him to think and obsess over you for the entire day. It’s not about pretending to be someone you not. You want your authentic self to come across via text but unfortunately, a lot can get lost in translation and you may end up coming across in a way that isn’t true to who you are.

MORE: How to Tell if a Guy Likes You Through Texting 

Texting doesn’t come naturally to a lot of people and may cause you to unintentionally push a guy away before things even get started. That’s why I’m here. I’m going to share some amazing examples of texts to send that will guarantee he becomes obsessed with you.

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How to Tell If You’re an Option, Not a Priority in His Life post image

Everyone has their own unique vision of a perfect relationship, but it’s safe to say that no matter what that picture is, it includes being a top priority.

On a universal level, everyone wants to feel like they are hugely important in their partner’s life. You want to be cherished, not be relegated to an afterthought at the end of the day. You want a man who is over the moon to have found a woman like you, a man who loves you just as much as (if not more than!) you love him.

MORE: What to Do When You’re Not a Priority

Sadly, sometimes a man just isn’t present and connecting in this way. He might be distracted by other things in his life, such as work or family problems. Maybe he secretly doesn’t see a legitimate future with you, and as a result, isn’t putting in the effort.

When this is the case, it’s crucial you spot it as early as possible. If you see the signs, don’t fall into the trap of thinking things will change. Think of your friends who have put their sweat and tears into changing a relationship like this. It never works.

Save yourself the time and emotional stress by seeing for yourself if you’re really a priority in his life. Once you are open to them, you’ll see if the signs are there.

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How to Get a Guy to Like You and Want to Date You post image

What is that special something, that intangible quality that makes a woman irresistible?

You’ve probably seen it in another woman before. We typically find it much easier to see someone else’s charm than our own. It’s difficult to describe, but some women are just magnetizing. Men seem instantly drawn towards them.

MORE: 11 Ways to Get a Guy to Like You

It’s definitely not a matter of checking a list of boxes physically. Your appearance is part of it, but there’s way more to this puzzle. Truthfully, once you step into your full and authentic power, you’ll perfectly embody the most attractive version of yourself.

But how do you do that? It’s all about adopting the right mindset.

Here are 16 things you can do to transform into your best self, and thus make any guy desperate to date you!

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12 Warning Signs a Guy Just Wants a Hookup But Not a Relationship post image

While we all know some men are only interested in hooking up, it’s not always as clear which men those are!

Some guys are super upfront about what they want. Others either accidentally or purposefully send mixed messages. Regardless of how he goes about expressing it, some guys are just not ready for a relationship.

It could be that he’s not in the right stage of life for a commitment. Maybe he just doesn’t like you enough to jump into a relationship. We know this is easier said than done, but don’t take that personally! It happens to everyone.

MORE: How to Know if a Guy is Wasting Your Time

If you suspect your current crush isn’t feeling a relationship, pay attention to that doubt. Considering how easy it is to fall into the trap of self-deception, we have to be vigilant. Be honest with yourself before you end up wasting time on the wrong guy.

To help you avoid that exact scenario, here are the top twelve signs he only wants to hook up:

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What Makes a Man Want An Exclusive Relationship With You? post image

What makes a man want exclusivity with you? It’s a question burdening countless women.

Here is how it usually plays out. You’re seeing a guy that you really like. He seems to like you a lot too. You hang out often, you laugh, you connect … but you’re not an official couple. You try bringing it up to him, but he either changes the subject or gives you some excuse as to why he doesn’t want to be exclusive. You feel hurt and confused. It doesn’t make any sense, everything seems to be going so well, why doesn’t he want an exclusive relationship with you?

When you’re in it, it’s a painful question and the answer can seem hard to find. But it’s actually all pretty basic.

MORE: Major Signs He’ll Never Commit

So let’s look at exactly what it takes to make a guy want to be exclusive with you.

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55 Love Text Messages to Make Him Smile and Get Him to Want You More post image

How can you get a guy to miss you and think about you and want you even more? With the texts you’ll find in this article!

Texting is our main mode of communication these days, and can really enhance a relationship when done right.

We get a ton of questions from women wondering why guys don’t text back, or why he disappeared, or why he stopped texting. The main thing you need to realize when it comes to men and texting is that men will pretty much always respond to texts that make them feel good. And conversely, he will avoid dealing with texts that feel bad.

MORE: How to Give Him Space So He Misses You And Comes Back

What’s the difference?

“I can’t stop thinking about you. Ugh, why are you so hot?” This makes him feel good.

“Why haven’t you replied to my last text? I saw that you were on Facebook earlier so you obviously saw it! This is unacceptable!” This makes him feel bad and he will push off dealing with it.

The texts in this article will make him smile and crave you.  Some will intrigue, some will make him laugh,  some will make him blush- but all of them will make him feel good and that is what will make him miss you and count the minutes until he can see you again.

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Don’t Be an Option: When You Are Not a Priority in His Life, Do This post image

Let’s talk about when a man treats you like an option instead of a priority.

I get so many variations of this question. They usually sound as follows: my boyfriend doesn’t make me a priority, what do I do? … I want to spend more time with him, but he doesn’t seem to want the same … I don’t feel like a priority in my relationship … My husband puts everything before me … How do I make him appreciate me?

MORE: How Do I Get Him to Treat Me Like a Priority? 

When you are not a priority, it’s a horrible feeling. You end up in the toxic cycle of trying to prove your worth to him and carve out space for yourself in his life. You just have this feeling of not being enough and it eats away at you. And how could it not? You’re seemingly not at all important to the person who is the most important to you. It hurts.

You don’t get a man to treat you like a priority by demanding it or even asking for it. You need to inspire it.

Read on to find out exactly how to become his number 1 priority.

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How To Know If a Guy is Wasting Your Time: Signs He Won’t Commit post image

There’s a saying that goes, you can never recycle wasted time, and oh how true that is.

No one intends to get into a dead-end relationship. Most of us want that real, true, long-lasting love and our quest for it can sometimes lead us to stay in situations that are the opposite of what we want.

Why does it happen? Well, we get so caught up in the potential of what could be, rather than looking at what is.

You’re dating this guy and he just checks so many boxes. And you rarely experience this kind of chemistry so you would be foolish to let it slip away! Sure, he doesn’t seem to be on the same page as you, but maybe with just a little encouragement, you’ll be able to get him there.

MORE: 5 Signs He’ll Never Commit

Maybe once he sees how amazing you are … maybe if you can help him get over the ex who broke his heart … maybe if you can just wait it out a little longer … then he’ll step up and be who you want him to be.

I’ve deluded myself in this way many times and I’ve seen many others do it as well so I can tell you: this never turns out well! 

Don’t let yourself be lured by what could be, look at the situation as it is right here, right now, and then decide what you’d like to do. To help you get there, these are the biggest signs you’re wasting your time with him and he isn’t going to commit to you:

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