I went on my second date with this guy who happens to be a co-worker. Up until that point everything was great: fun conversation, chatting of texts, etc.
On our second date I had nothing to eat that day and we went out for drinks. Long story short, I ended up getting extremely drunk out of the blue, got sick and he ended up having to baby-sit me at his place that night. That morning he poked some fun at me, but was very sweet. I texted him to apologize, but he hasn’t responded yet (it’s been a few hours).
Everything leading up to now has been so good and would indicate he’s into me (holding hands, gazing into my eyes, etc.) Please tell me what I should do next and if I may have lost my chance with him. And if I screwed it up, how do I redeem myself?
That’s certainly embarrassing, but what happened happened… the best you can do now is just relax and give him some space to come back to you.
Everyone makes mistakes and you don’t sound like an alcoholic or anything. You just sound like a girl who made a mistake like anyone does.
But it’s a forgivable mistake and it’s not a deal-breaker or anything. Who knows, it may have even humanized you in his eyes – sometimes people feel closer to others when they see them at their worst, most-unguarded, most-vulnerable state.
Just relax and don’t sweat it. You said you were embarrassed and that you were sorry… that’s all that needed to be said. If you can show that you’re secure enough to just relax and let it go, it will come across as attractive.
Most girls screw situations like this up after whatever original incident they feel was the problem. To puke is human, but to become insecure and needy is deadly to attraction.
For example, I know this girl who met a guy she really liked. They went on a few dates together and everything was going along great.
Now this girl also got into the same type of situation… wasn’t keeping track of how much she was drinking and ended up with her head in the bowl all night at a party.
These things happen. I wouldn’t call this a shining example of humanity at its best, but the guy looked at it as a mistake and kind of felt bad for the girl for having such a rough night.
Problem is: she thought admidst her teary eyes, disheveled hair and runny make-up that there was no way he could ever see her as attractive again and started getting really needy and constantly texting him for reassurance that he still liked her and thought she was attracted.
Moreover, because she thought she ruined her chances, she basically sabotauged herself. When he did try to reassure her, she would dismiss it and say something like, “You’re just saying that…” or “You’re just trying to make me feel better.” Uhh… excrutiating – it hurts my heart to think about it.
The sad part is that when he ran screaming for the hills (and believe me it only took about a week of this neediness for him to want to vanish), she was still convinced that it was the original incident that was the problem.
Oh yeah and one more thing… I totally got sick on a date once for mixing up a bunch of different cheap liquor and not watching myself. Embarrassing yes, but it didn’t negatively affect my relationship because I didn’t let it affect me. She still gave me crap though and it was well deserved. ;)
Just trust that you are still attractive in his eyes and that it’s behind you both. Give it a little time and relax – you’ll be fine.
Hope it helps,