clearly speaking to him about addressing the toxic dynamic directly, you have clearly given him the opportunity to choose how he’d like to proceed.
He might choose not to change, in which case you might choose to end the relationship (or drastically limit your exposure to him if completely leaving is not possible).
He might fight you hard at first, but without your negative reaction to his habitual communication to you, he might begin to change when he realizes you really will leave if things don’t change.
Or… he might be surprisingly understanding and receptive to what you tell him and be willing to work with you on improving the relationship together. That’s the best case scenario, and remember, you really are in this together.
If you do decide to stay in the relationship and he is willing to consciously work on how he communicates with you, make sure you remember that you’re on the same side and you’re right there with him (not standing back waiting, judging, and watching with your arms crossed).
I mention this because too often I see articles about toxic relationships putting the blame 100% on the other person, which doesn’t serve you since it’s always important to be conscious of your what you’re putting out there as well. It serves you to always have this awareness.
Relationships happen in real time, moment to moment. They are not “things”, like a rock or a car or a bed. They are an ongoing, living, breathing dance with another person and you choose to dance with them every single day you have this relationship with them.
Always remember that you choose them every day… and you have the power to stop choosing your current relationship dynamic if it no longer works in your life.
Good luck in your relationship, I wish you the very best.
Hope it helps,