he’s just an additional benefit (or an annoyance) and not a major wrecking ball to your emotional state.
The funny thing about love and relationships is that it will bring up all that is unloved within ourselves. It’s a process life forces us all through, but most people try to find some way to ignore that process and it drags out over the course of years and years (when it could be handled once and for all quickly…)
Believe me when I tell you that Sabrina and I both have gone through extreme relationship pain back in the day – you don’t get wisdom or growth without pain and struggle. That’s part of the deal.
It sounds corny, but the love from your relationships is only as good as the love you have for your life and for your self. It is THE limiting factor on your love life: As long as you allow conflicts or fears within yourself to remain, your love life will suffer in various ways.
The way that you eliminate that pain and “regain” that part of yourself that you feel you lost, you must end the suffering that you are creating for yourself.
This sounds funny, but when I think of what it is like to end suffering, I think of an animal… like a dog or a cat.
The animal might suffer in an acute moment of stress / fear / fighting, but when it’s done… it’s done! And the animal is fine and enjoying being in the moment.
You have the choice to be “fine” too… that’s the life lesson you will get to learn from this situation. Whether or not you want to get rid of the guy from your life is up to you – the most important factor here is your own growth.
Hope that helps,