Six Annoying Traits Guys Wish Girls Would Get Rid Of post image

Six Annoying Traits Guys Wish Girls Would Get Rid Of


If I’ve learned anything over the years as a relationship writer, it’s that men and women really have no idea what the other side is thinking. Each gender also seems to have the same kinds of complaints against the other. And thus, the war of the sexes rages on!

On ANM, we spend a lot of time addressing the issues women have with their men. We talk about why guys act the way they do  (we even wrote a book on it!) and uncover what’s really going on inside their thick, manly skulls.

While that’s all well and good, I’ve decided to take a different approach with this article by revealing the common complains men have against us gals (as much as we hate to admit it, we also have faults!). I’ve consulted with our resident male-mind expert, Eric Charles, as well as some of my other close guy friends to find out some universal grievances men have. I have to admit, I’m totally guilty of committing a lot of these but whatever, you live and learn!

Read on for six annoying  traits guys wish girls would get rid of.

1. When a girl doesn’t take care of herself and just complains about her appearance. Don’t complain to a guy about your weight and get mad when he suggests you join a gym because what you really wanted was for him to tell you how hot your body is. If you’re not happy with it, why should he be?

2. Making him feel guilty for things when really she’s just insecure. For instance, trying to force him to compliment you more and/or be more romantic because you are insecure and don’t trust his feelings for you. Guys don’t want to have to feel bad about your insecurities. If you’re struggling, he’ll be there to support you but don’t make your issues his fault.

3. Not loving herself and having low confidence. A girl can be absolutely gorgeous with a killer body, but if she has no confidence, she will be unattractive to a guy and he won’t want to be with her. A woman is 1000x more sexy when she believes she has a hot body that he wants. Most girls don’t realize that true sex appeal is almost completely mental.

4. Talking him out of compliments. Take his damn compliment! If he tells you that you look beautiful, don’t tell him you don’t and point out the breakouts along your chin. He’s not complimenting you for sport, he means it, so smile and say thank you!

5. Trying to get him to do things by comparing him to her ex or to things he used to do. The worst way to do this is, “You used to bring me flowers every day, why don’t you do that anymore? My ex boyfriend brought me two dozen roses every single day.” This is the number one way to ensure he never gives you so much as a rose petal he found on the floor.

6. Nagging and constantly complaining about his ways of doing things. Guys are all for self-improvement, but if you nag them, they will only grow to resent you and will do the opposite of what you want. If you want him to change a behavior, come from a place of love and appreciation, not criticism and frustration.

Bonus: Not showing appreciation. Men may come off all big and tough, but deep down they are starved for appreciation and acknowledgment. They can’t stand it when women only hone in on the things they’re not doing rather than appreciating the nice things they are doing.
The moral of the story: love yourself, be confident, be proud of who you are and more importantly, what you look like. Also, try to put your gratitude goggles on and show your man some love and appreciation for all the things he does to make you happy, both big and small.

Yes, it may take work to break old habits and grow into a better version of you, but the differences you’ll experience, both in your quality of life and in the quality of your relationship, will make it all worth it.
– SABRINA ALEXIS

Written by Sabrina Alexis

I’m Sabrina Alexis, the co-founder, and co-editor of A New Mode. I love writing relatable, insightful articles that help people understand relationship dynamics and how to get the love they want. I have a degree in psychology and have spent the last 10 years interviewing countless men and reading and studying as much as I can to better understand human psychology and how men operate. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Instagram.

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Julie

Eric, I just spent the last 2 hours reading articles you have written. They have confirmed my confidence as a beautiful, independent, sexy and desirable woman. I am happy and have met a man I am interested in. Thank you for the guidance and assurance that I am making all the right moves – naturally. Keep on doing what you are doing. Us beautiful women need the affirmation. Thanks again! Julie

Reply September 28, 2017, 10:40 am

Kate

While I support your beliefs, I beg to differ on you saying, “you should never submit to a man’s demand just because he asked. I will have been with my husband going on 16 years this March. We communicate. That; is the quality of a good (even great) relationship. Married or otherwise. Kudos on a job well tried.

Reply November 18, 2016, 12:05 am

stacey

Reading the article about unconditiinal love being a myth. The husband is pointing out to his wife that she doesnt need to eat 2 pieces of cake because it was helping contribute to her being bigger than she was at the beginning of their relationship. As if he is trying to say that she didnt exhibit the over eating habits at the beginning of the relationship and wishes her to return to the eating habits that she had when the relationship started.
I know that its not being said the exact same way as in this article which is about annoying things girls do. Specifically # 5. Trying to get him to do things by comparing him to her ex OR TO THINGS HE USED TO DO. The worst way to do this is, “You used to bring me flowers every day, why don’t you do that anymore? OR My ex boyfriend brought me two dozen roses every single day.” This is the number one way to ensure he never gives you so much as a rose petal he found on the floor.:
So its ok to tell your wife she shouldn’t eat as much cake because its making her fat and she never used to be that fat when we first got together.
As long as i subtly tell her, in a nice way, that she needs to exhibit the behavior that she used to exhibit because the current behavior is having an impact on my attraction to her.
But its not ok for the woman to ask the man, in a straightforward way, to exhibit the behavior he once had at the beginning of a relationship. Even though the initial behavior of the guy at the beginning of the relationship was a contributing behavior of her attraction to him.

I understand that its two different things being brought up two different ways, but both are being compared as habits in their own way, all though said differently. I feel as though maybe #5 needs a bit more explanation to not sound as though its being a bit hypocritical. Cuz the point that’s coming across to me is that its ok to tell a girl that she needs to go back to old habits in order to make her less fat and more physically attractive but its not ok to tell a guy that he needs to go back to old habits in order to make him less rough around the edges and more emotionally attractive.
Can you please explain the difference:
Is it the way its being said?
Can guys not take criticism as well as a woman?
Is it nagging if you are a woman, but a simple request if you are a man?

Reply August 24, 2016, 3:00 am

Honestly

I mean.. Maybe women don’t take compliments because they’ve grown up in a society where women are punished for confidence. You’re cocky is you’re confident and you must look a certain why. It’s not women. It’s society.

Reply December 13, 2015, 1:57 pm

Mannat

i have been reading your mail n posts everyday … it irritates me that you give advice to all the girls do this , do that for your guy ,,. but then again my question is what about our feelings ? our expectations ? why is always we girl’s have to make a compromise ,, what we really want is some care n love from our partner . i don’t think this is hell lot of big deal for them .. but then why always why we girls do every sort of change for a relationship which is A two way thing , not just a girl’s responsibility.

Reply October 16, 2015, 4:43 am

poo yee

i did talking out of a guy compliment in the past XDD .NOw ,i did not anymore ,i say tq ;p

Reply December 25, 2013, 9:12 am

mary annie

Seriously? Women have this kind of presentation for the men in their lives? Is there any chance that accepting people as they are is part of the art and science of being with someone who is not exactly like you? And what is it with this self-centered female that she would need to bounce every dysfunctional insecurity off on a random guy? It sounds more like people throwing up walls and digging moats and stocking them with alligators in self defense as women walk the mine fields filled with the flakiest type of player men to move in civilized society since the free love bs of the 60’s. The only things these player doinks are missing these days is the lame polyester suits and the gaudy-awful gold chains.

Reply December 18, 2012, 8:08 pm

Jaz

Thank you for advising us what we shouldn’t do. But could you give us alternative ways to act in such situations? I mean other than saying what we shouldn’t say to a guy, could you include some examples of how we could say it and it would help? For instance in a situation where he stopped working as much around you, complimenting you and doing romantic things. Instead of saying “why’d you stop this..” Or “my ex would do that..” (which to me are obvious mistakes) how do you actually make him understand that you miss that in a non-accusing way? That’s what’s more tricky for me to know.

Reply October 31, 2012, 3:35 am

Jackie

First of all I think you need to evaluate the whole situation & what are the other things that your guy does for you other than those romantic stuff. Men express their love more by actions than words & its unfair to judge a man by simply giving out compliments or some romantic stuff. Second is you also have to look at the way you’re acting around him. Coz lets face it, we women are more emotionally driven & sometimes the things that we think are pretty normal for us & our girlfriends are to a man, it appears more like being a needy or clingy which isn’t good. I’m not a guy but I have a lot of guy friends who pretty much hates those stuff their women are throwing up on them.

Reply November 7, 2012, 2:55 am

Mike

I agree with your last comment, Jackie. Men express themselves differently than women when it comes to affection. On a side note, I’ve noticed that some men have learned to lay it on thick with women (i.e., seduce women by capitalizing on women’s more verbally or gesture affirmative inclinations in love, i.e. Players) in order to meet a short-term selfish goal. If you want to know if a man is serious or not, watch what he does to facilitate you two being together more than solely listening to what he says or being diverted by grandiose gestures imo..

Reply June 10, 2016, 11:11 am

Jaci

Ha! This was funny, and so true!

Reply October 30, 2012, 5:06 pm

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