7 Myths About What Men Find Hot post image

7 Myths About What Men Find Hot

You might not know the truth about what men really find hot.

Here’s why: Magazines, TV and all forms of entertainment are lying to you about what actually attracts men, so that they can sell you products. These days, marketing doesn’t just happen during the commercials and ads either.

The beauty, fashion, skincare, diet and fitness companies spend billions of dollars to seamlessly insert their product everywhere they can, along with the message that men won’t find you attractive unless you buy their product.

Magazines want you to be insecure because insecure women make better customers.  Point being: you really can’t trust magazines, TV or Hollywood to tell you what men actually respond to.

To make matters worse, if you’re one of the women who’s been misled on what men actually find hot (and most women are), then I have bad news: Men aren’t going to correct you.

I know, it sounds evil. A woman’s appearance is already a hot-button topic and, frankly, men don’t want to deal with the potential emotional aftermath from commenting on a woman’s appearance. It’s never a comfortable topic for a man to sit down and say, “Hey…I don’t really care about your nail polish color, just so you know…”

These seven myths will shock you, make you smile or have you nodding your head. By the end, you will have an entirely fresh perspective on the truth about what men find hot (and what men could care less about).

As I said at the beginning, magazines, TV, Hollywood, etc. lie to make women insecure in order to prime them for the sale.

This is true, but because I’m pointing this out as the lead-in to my article, I need to make something clear:do recommend products in this article.  My intention is not to make you buy them… or to suggest you’ll be “better” or “more” if you use these products.  I am simply sharing products that I use myself because I feel good using them.

I want to make explicitly clear: You do not need products to make you sexy.  You already have all the sexiness you could ever want inside you – no product can give you the sexiness you already have and nothing (and nobody) can take it away from you.

I just had to make that clear before we began because it would seem awfully hypocritical if I lambasted magazines for hawking products and then wrote an article to advertise products.

You have my word that this article was written for you.  This is to help you feel better, happier and sexier… not to be yet another beauty article pushing product.  We’ve all had enough of that.

So now that we’re clear, let’s begin!

Myth #1: Men care about boob size
Reality: Men like all shapes and sizes, but the hottest thing is your attitude about what you’ve got. If you really don’t feel comfortable with yourself, it won’t matter if you have perfectly sculpted breasts…your inner attitude will not be attractive.

Tip: Buy a push up bra so that you feel extra confident when going out on the town, or on a first date. The right bra can make a huge difference in the way you look and feel, it can also make you look slimmer. I know it may seem silly to splurge on a bra, but trust me, quality is key.
Try: Ampere Chelsea Bra, $95.

ampere bra

MORE: 5 Ways to be Irresistible to Men

Myth #2: Men love when you leave nothing to the imagination
Reality: Men don’t generally feel most attracted to the obvious attempt to appear provocative. The truth is, men are attracted to a glimpse, but not a full frontal, designed to specifically get attention. There is nothing wrong with enjoying attention, but if you are uncomfortable and trying to impress, it’s an automatic turn off. It’s important to maintain a bit of lust n any relationship, whether you’re in the initial stages of dating or have been settled into the comforts of wedded bliss for many years.
Tip: Choose one part you feel best about to show off. Don’t try to impress by wearing a see through dress, heels you can’t walk in, and a boob-bearing top that makes it look like they are dying to spill out. This gives off the impression that you are trying too hard to impress. Men are attracted to comfortable women who know that they don’t have to wear a suffocating dress to be hot.


Here’s are a few styles that will help achieve that balance:


Adrianna Papell Lace Sheath Dress ($118); French Connection Feather Ruth Classic ($150); Felicity & Coco Crochet Back Maxi Dress ($78)

Myth #3: Men care about nail polish
Reality: Men don’t notice your nail polish. Sure, some might be confused about why you are wearing neon or yellow, but the bottom line is: if you feel sexy in it, wear it. If you don’t, don’t.

Note: this doesn’t mean do nothing to your nails…keep them clean and throw on a base coat and you’re good to go. Also, chipped nails just look sloppy, so if your mani is starting to wear off, just get rid of it. Guys may not care that you’re wearing this season’s hottest new shade, but they do like a woman who takes care of herself and clean nails give off that vibe. Do what makes you feel comfortable and what you love, not what you think will be hot.

Myth #4: Men care about your accessories
Reality: Men look at basic, simple “hotness.” Accessories are something women fixate on, but the truth is men don’t care if you’re wearing a stacks of bangles or the latest statement necklace.

However, men do find it attractive when a woman is wearing something that draws attention to specific areas, like a pendant necklace that rests on your bust-line, like this:


Vince Camuto ‘Summer Warrior’ Tassel Pendant Necklace ($68)

A man will love looking at your naked body contrasted by a staple piece, like a strand of pearls. Whether you shell out thousands or not, it’s the same to a guy.


Kate Spade ‘All Wrapped Up’ Short Glass Pearl Necklace ($128)

The point is, if you enjoy wearing accessories and it makes you feel sexy, go for it. If you don’t, don’t think to impress a man you have to.

Myth #5: Men hate makeup and only like “natural looks”
Reality: Men don’t hate makeup. Men don’t hate “fake women.” Men are, however, put off by women who try to do things to appear a specific way.

There is nothing wrong with wearing a lot of makeup. What turns a man off is if a woman cakes on tons of makeup then proceeds to dismiss his compliments and instead complain about her appearance.

Men are attracted to a woman who is comfortable with who she is, and does things that make her feel sexy. It’s not about what makeup tricks you’ve learned, it’s about your mindset and why you’re trying to go for a certain look.

MORE: What Do Guys Like in a Girl?

 Tip: Men tend to love a good cat eye. Pick up Bobbi Brown’s Long-Wear Gel Eyeliner ($24) and you will have a seductive cat eye looks that stays put for the entire night.

Myth #6: Men only like toothpicks
Reality: Men love skinny women. Men love curves. Some say men want a size zero, others say men want something to grab onto. It’s silly people get so caught up in this debate because in reality…. men want a woman who doesn’t care about “what men want” when it comes to body weight. They want a woman who is comfortable in her own skin.

Men love when a woman is healthy, loves taking care of her body, loves eating right and staying fit, and is kind to herself.  Men want a woman who does not look to specific standards of beauty as some guideline on what to be…men like healthy weights…but all different sizes.

MORE: What Do Guys Really Think of Skinny Girls?

Tip: Apply a fake tanner at night for a natural, healthy and glowing look first thing in the morning. Not only will you have a healthy glow without needing to put on makeup, a fake tan will automatically have a slimming effect. You’ll look five pounds thinner overnight. I recommend St. Tropez Bronzing Lotion ($30).

Myth #7: Men love contraptions and lingerie
Reality: Sure, men find a basic bra and panties hot…but going all out and bringing out all the stops honestly does nothing for the majority of men…sure, it can be fun and if it is fun for you, then it will be sexy.

But the reason it’ll be sexy is not because of the material of your luxury lingerie you purchased from Victoria’s Secret or La Perla, but rather…how much fun you have in what you wear and what your attitude is about it…

If you think a super contraption-oriented lingerie bodysuit is the key to turning a man on, think twice: a bare, naked body, or basic bra and panties with a few spritzes of perfume on your wrist, one trinket of jewelry, and a pair of heels is all you need to drive him absolutely nuts.

If you have seen Sex and the City, I’m sure you have noticed Carrie’s signature “boy underwear” and bra-less white tank top. This is a sexy, simple look that requires no expensive trips to the lingerie store.

Here are some of my picks:

Victoria’s Secret Hiphugger Panty ($11.50)
victorias secret hiphugger
Victoria’s Secret Lace Satin Slip,$49.50
victorias secret slip

Keep in mind, what men find most seductive is when a woman is comfortable in her skin and takes care of herself. If you find yourself comparing yourself to other women, always remember: confidence is the sexiest thing a woman can have on.

At the end of the day, if you feel sexy in something, go for it. Don’t base what you wear on a man’s opinion of it.

Got any more male myths to debunk? Tell us in comments!

– anastasia smith

Written by Sabrina Alexis

I’m Sabrina Alexis, the co-founder, and co-editor of A New Mode. I love writing relatable, insightful articles that help people understand relationship dynamics and how to get the love they want. I have a degree in psychology and have spent the last 10 years interviewing countless men and reading and studying as much as I can to better understand human psychology and how men operate. If you want to get in touch with me, hit me up on Facebook or Instagram.

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iam 68. been dating for 1 1/2 years. have looked on a few dating sites. have looked at close to 250 ladies. have mesg 70-80. have got back 20-30 mesg. have went out with 7-8. once or twice. have gone out a lot with 3. i think these numbers are about avg. but now have 8 as reg friends on FB. i feel very blessed. so dont feel bad when you cant date very many. unless you have money and time to travel dont talk ladies not near you. when i look at a lady the eyes and smile tell me a lot. if she cant smile shes out. but iam sucker for blond hair, so now the girl iam, dating is not blond. shes 74 but will pass for 60 in a hart beat. yes its good for the old mans ego to be with a lady that looks prettier than i deserve. when i started dating i wanted a FG. but God gave me what i needed. some of best reg friends i could want. above ALL allways be a gentleman.

Reply June 10, 2017, 9:35 pm


Very good your article and I found it absolutely true…thanks for the tips.:)

Reply November 18, 2014, 3:03 pm


I love your articles. They have been very helpful and a joy to read. However, I have an issue that is never addressed in dating forums. I am a divorced, single mother of 2 teenagers. My youngest is 13. While your advice has helped me get back in the saddle so to speak, it never addresses the issues of dating with children. It would be helpful to have any kind of a guide or direction to a site or articles that would help in that area. Think about it, you meet, get along well with…but at what point do you begin to do things together. How do you deal with the your place or mine dilemma. It’s hard to become emotional or develop a relationship when you have kids. It’s not just how you feel but how they feel and how he feels about them. I have been dating a guy for almost a year. We tend to “get together” at his place because his kids are grown and they don’t ask us those kinds of questions. He is really a great guy and I have no idea how to proceed or whether to get more seriously involved or how to approach these issues/questions with him. Thanks!

Reply July 25, 2014, 2:16 pm

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