This topic contains 166 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Ashley 6 years, 4 months ago.
May 17, 2015 at 4:29 pm #428560
I don’t,M.,,, he does…sorry for the visualMay 17, 2015 at 4:33 pm #428563
Goodness, I mean I learned how to play his game. I don’t think there is anyone in the world made like him. Part of why I stayed was my sense of humor.May 17, 2015 at 4:35 pm #428566
Hi Dauny. I was referring to the way he persuaded her to see him. I don’t know about his sexual behavior. I don’t think your situation can be related to hers.May 17, 2015 at 5:14 pm #428581
Sex with him is not regular I would say, he is usually up to something. Depends on his mood, it can be wild or just trying out new positions. If he is tired he says he feels unwell and only being served can make him feel better. There are times like this one when my needs would be kept on the backseat and there are times when he will show me a good time. I don’t like talking about sex life but I see that it reflects something here. I want to stop this. I am up for all he wants to experiment as long as it doesn’t hurts physically.
It’s night now and no reply and callbacks from him. I left one message in the evening asking if he is back. Nothing. I will think about work and get busy, but what if he calls me there?May 17, 2015 at 5:26 pm #428588
Given your last post I seriously think if you don’t see why you should leave him, you should consider getting some “help” yourself… That whole first paragraph made me feel so badly for you. The fact that he’s capable of convincing you that sex is the only thing that makes you feel better so you oblige is almost sickening. THIS is the difference between being a manipulator *him and being easily manipulated *you. F*CK NO will you EVER be getting a*s from me unless it’s something I want to do… Yes, maybe you’ll have a bad day and I know sex will make you feel better so I don’t initially want to do it but the fact that I want to comfort you and make you happy makes me want to do it= I’m still enjoying it and funding it satisfying for MYSELF in a circumstance like this. Back in the day men used to beautifully court women… Somewhere along the way we lost some of our dignity and they lost respect. So sadMay 17, 2015 at 5:27 pm #428589
*makes him feel betterMay 17, 2015 at 6:17 pm #428600
I am feeling sad reading that. I never thought of it this way. I read that he is probably a selfish dickhead and I haven’t been able to see it. If this is true, I probably need to love myself and do what I enjoy most without being interrupted by him and I need to keep on reminding myself why I am doing this.
I just saw a new girl being added to his FB. We are all mature and over 30 here but hey FB is not a toy. Grown ups do use that to connect. I cannot see where she came from, I am just assuming too much and not liking it.May 17, 2015 at 6:25 pm #428601
This guy has serious issues. I think you should cut him out of your life for your well being. He is just going to continue to give you problems and I don’t see the benefit of being with him. This guy certainly isn’t going to make you happy or feel good about yourself accepting this treatment from a man. You will save yourself a lot of trouble if you just end it now before you get even more unhappy & lose all your self-worthMay 17, 2015 at 6:28 pm #428602
Ashley, was hoping you would see this. Thanks for your post. I am just lost here!! I tolerated his texts and then I supported him and this is what I get !! I want to not just end this but make him realise first what he has been doing or has done! I am full of hurt feelings and out of words here :/May 17, 2015 at 6:46 pm #428605
I know how you feel.. I’ve dealt with some bad guys like this before and unfortunately, when you support them, this is what happens. It does not make the situation good. The guy just disrespects you because he sees you are settling for less so he does not treat you with value. They don’t reciprocate because all they are concerned with are themselves. I know how bad it sucks. The ONLY thing you can do is leave. Take it from me, the time you waste on these situations you can’t get back & you will wish you had just walked away. It’s in no way shape or form worth itMay 17, 2015 at 7:17 pm #428612
Anon, I’m sorry if I made you feel bad, I just hope you know when you look deep into your core that you deserve the best. And someone out there was made specifically to fulfill all of those desires. We all go through this, we all fall for below par guys or stay in unstable relationships so I don’t want you to think there’s anything “wrong” with you… My friends and family are more cynical than myself & I just truly still believe in and have faith in that whole-hearted, deep, almost destined, love… I’m only saying that if this isn’t THAT for you, how you imagine the purest form of love, let it go because I just can’t help but believe it’s out there for everyone :) and if you settle for anything less, you’re truly missing out on what makes life worth living.May 17, 2015 at 7:28 pm #428615
I said before to rethink other issues. But the only thing is, is he really making you happy inside? Without drama and all. If not, just go, plenty of guys outthere, you have a good life, you can find new friends and a new guy. Something is telling me that the stunt he pulled here, suddenly saying i cant do this, is not the only stunt he pulled on you.May 17, 2015 at 9:40 pm #428623
S, I wasn’t just referring to what you said. There was a lot of talk about manipulation. Maybe I hit reply on the wrong spot. Being worrying about being punished in bed and what OP describes in later post sounds a lot like my experience with a master manipulator with narcissistic and even sometimes cruel tendencies.May 18, 2015 at 1:50 am #428650
You all made me look deeper into the issue. Thanks Ashley, Dauny and Newbie. Jenny don’t be sorry, you did not say anything wrong.
No, this is not the first time he did something like this.
Again, in the middle of the night I have two text. 1. I am not well . 2. resting. How do I ignore this? Obviously, I will ask whats wrong! Isn’t it?
It does not say why he is not well. what happened?! I did tried reaching him out but I get that at 1:00 – 2:00 Am .
For now, going to get ready for the day.May 18, 2015 at 1:51 am #428652
How would you suggest I handle it this time? Thanks xxMay 18, 2015 at 2:45 am #428669
We are not in a relationship its just we have been talking for 6 months. Now he doesn’t message me much. Whenever I message he gives a to the point reply and he says he is busy in his work, though I see him online most of the time and if I don’t message him then he is like u don’t message me. But when I do I don’t get a nice reply so I don’t message him like I used to do. I don’t know if I should talk to him anymoreMay 18, 2015 at 5:08 am #428684
anon when he went out with friends he was fine wasnt he?? U are not his mom. you don’t have to text back at nite. u make it v easy for him to walk all over u. no wonder he takes u for granted. I know most people here advice to walk away. u don’t want to. u probably want him to be less selfish and more considerate. but ur still letting urself run at his back and call.May 18, 2015 at 5:15 am #428686
put your foot down and grow a back bone.. stop doing things the way he wants them always. there should be give and take. if its only give and give, things sour and the giver ends up with lots of resentment. learn to say no and learn to put yourself first also.May 18, 2015 at 5:20 am #428687
Hi Anon, the only way that works is that u tell him how much u love and need him.
I am like ur bf. Many a time I do wierd things that even I don’t understand myself. But I figured that it all because I wanted his attention. When he sticks with me through all the hard time I gave him, I know he truly loves me. The only way to deal with someone like me is to ignore all the bad things just like my bf and continue to show u love and care. It will have a profound effect on the other person. But I admit not everybody can do it like ny bf.May 18, 2015 at 5:29 am #428688
I have not replied to him yet. Yes he was fine when he left. Should I just ask what happ?May 18, 2015 at 5:39 am #428690
Relationships can have all sorts of problems . I want to try to work it out before I give up. I love him after all.May 18, 2015 at 6:02 am #428692
I have Texted what happened. Couldn’t call. I will be busy will not be able to entertain tantrums today .May 18, 2015 at 6:08 am #428693
I don’t always believe in walking out. if he’s not like this then move on. if he does not do that then move on. it all comes down to u. u obviously resent him being like this. taking you for granted. that’s y you are on this site. and hence your post.
all I am saying is that try putting your foot down at times and don’t always let him walk all over u. or get his way. no just connect with him tomorrow. he avoided u the whole day. so U can certainly message him after few hours tomorrow. dnt be mean don’t be rude. because that’s not your style I think. but u can be firm and put ur foot down.May 18, 2015 at 6:10 am #428694
that’s ok. ur reply..:-). its funny..lol..gudMay 18, 2015 at 11:06 am #428725
he was fine before then texts you he is “not well” like what? sorry but do you know how ridiculous this sounds? if you are still entertaining this guy then don’t be surprised with his antics because you are basically sending the message you will put up with anything & that is not a good message to put out