4 months in and suddenly he's gone quiet on me


Home Forums Complicated Situation / Mixed Signals 4 months in and suddenly he's gone quiet on me

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  • #506399 Reply

    shally

    been with a good boy friend we shared everything bout us and feelings for two months then he invited me to his place, went there briefly took coffee and left, went second time coffee and left, 3rd time was dropping surprise cake for his birthday hugged for the first time and left, 4th time we kissed, 5th time we went to next level, pap he went cold i was bothered and i asked why he said nothing wrong, coz i was missing our relationship before intimacy tension came after, he came back we met again after a week, he went cold again and i accepted his silence and backed off though i said i wasnt comfortable if its intimacy that has killed our friendship i wud do anything to rub it and go back to our official page,,, went quiet for 2weeks i was tempted and asked to meet him this time but not at his place he dint respond i had proposed the duration of our meeting he dint respond completely so i gave up and i dint talk completely, a day later that is yesterday he showed up where i work said hi and send a text hes soo happy to see me, i was like oh good to know..at night he was like goodnight messages, now am very careful i need to knw how to handle him after what has happened, meanwhile while he was quiet have been busy chatting with other buddies who managed to deviate attention from him, i love him though and he knows,.kindly help me have orderly steps.

    #516535 Reply

    Sonam

    Hi Guys,

    So I have a similar problem
    I am 25 years old and have been dating this guy for almost 3 months, who is 26 years old.
    He is a great guy, someone who I always longed to meet and we hit it off instantly. He is an introvert but is very talkative whenever i am with him.
    So we usually meet once or twice a week and the last time i met him was nearly 2 weeks ago. I started the topic about whether we are actually ‘exclusive’, as i don’t see this is just dating. He agreed and said that he classes me as his lady rather than the usual cliche talk about being bf / gf. He also said he wants to meet my Mum and i agreed to that too.
    His family are aware of me too, so he says.

    However since we last met, we have had daily contact via txt but we haven’t spoken on the phone. He then didn’t contact me for 2 days which was very out of character, so I gave in and attempted to call him but no answer. I then messaged him just to see if he was OK. He messaged me the following morning saying ‘Good Morning’ like things are normal. I replied with a delayed response saying ‘morning.’ Since this, no contact has been given. It’s approaching 2 weeks since i haven’t even heard his voice, what should i do?

    I feel like im going crazy because I have seriously fallen for this guy?

    I know i should give him space but i feel so lost and confused.

    #516574 Reply

    Janet

    2 weeks is a long time!!
    It sounds like he has moved on…even if he hasn’t l would suggest you do. A man shouldn’t treat you like this. 2 weeks silence is simple rude imo.
    Sorry you are experiencing this.

    #518874 Reply

    Shary

    Hey
    It’s been six months we are together and there were little up n downs and one major fight but then he returned back to me after blocking me from everywhere within 15 days, coming up with things like I miss you and stuff. Recently over the weekend I had an argument with him n he was on mistake so he apologized me whole night n things went normal. Even the next day we were talking in routine then at night he suddenly being non responsive n he blocked me in the morning by saying he needs ten days time to think about it and I miss him so bad afteR that going through swear depression. I send him several texts after that but he is being non responsive he reads them but don’t reply.

    #553242 Reply

    Jen B

    Hi, I have been with this guy for four months and we have been madly in love but two weeks ago we were supposed to have a weekend get a way together, he cancelled for work and that had to travel so I decided to travel for the weekend alone, while their I kept in touch and he told me he had gotten a food poisoning and un well, I felt bad and checked on him until when he returned and kept his phones off and we haven’t been communicating for like two weeks, I love him but I even don’t know whats going on between us. He has three kids, got a versectomy so he cant have more children and I love him anyway I chose to underlook that, but do you think he loves me well enough, iam scared I love him so much, thank you. Jen

    #553243 Reply

    Jen B

    HI Amy

    #554354 Reply

    Sarah pinkroses

    Omg.same problem with me. So how your situation? I know how you feel

    #554355 Reply

    Sarah pinkroses

    Oohh no…im facing a same situation. Already 1 week he silent from me. We dont fight, but i dont know

    #560597 Reply

    Mohita

    I have been through this too. One of my ex was a big time cheat, he was married but pretended to be single. He also played the same Meet and Withdraw game. Anyhoo, I sent a nice big email and all photos, selfies he had shared with me to his wife and her brother. Coming to my current boyfriend, we met over the weekend and since then he is silent. We were not dating but had feelings for each other. I even talked to his friends briefly when they called. We had a great time but I don’t understand the silent treatment. I guess I am just unlucky in love. 😔😔 After all this drama, Men claim that Women are complicated. I guess someone else caught his fancy, as I can see him online on whatsapp for late hours.

    #568320 Reply

    NicT

    Ok, so I met a guy via a dating app…we chatted via the app for about a week and I gave him my number. We’ve been texting everyday for almost two months with occasional phone calls and he was supposed to come see me this weekend and meet friends at a local event. We spoke on the phone Monday night, and texted Tue am…he texted he couldn’t wait to see me.

    I texted him Tue eve with no response, no biggie but didn’t hear from him at all Wed. I sent a “Hi” text and a “Hi” via the app on Thur nothing…emailed him yesterday (Fri) that I hope he’s okay because I’m worried about him.

    Now it’s Sat and I haven’t heard from him at all, I feel like a total fool! I will not contact him again but I just don’t get what happened? If he couldn’t come see me why not just say so, I don’t understand this “Ghosting” mentality. It hurts more to just be dropped then at least some sort of explanation…wondering if he’ll contact me again, just feeling defeated!

    #568430 Reply

    Raven

    I believe the term is catfished…

    #576890 Reply

    suzana

    Ladies stop making yourself guilty to give them space we need space too
    Suddenly he pulls back and and he will call when he feels It does not matter what ladies want but what the guys want…??
    He has been busy chasing another pra
    Hire a detective
    And move one ASAP

    #576899 Reply

    SS

    This rubber band thing sounds crazy. You have to know what you want. Do you want a guy that disappears for a few days? Because he will keep doing it. It should be unacceptable. Find a guy who is all in. Not lukewarm. I assure you, you deserve better than a guy that stops talking for a few days. if you’ve been seeing each other for 4 months he should know how he feels. Its not a question of will he come back..etc, It’s a point of don’t settle for less than what you deserve. Find someone who doesn’t make you wonder if they are interested. especially after 4 months.

    #578178 Reply

    DIANE MITCHELL

    after reading some of these posts i need to say im in avery new relationship . we r both in our 40s ..some weeks i see him 3 times others none depending on work at first txt loads with little emjoi hearts on txts then stopped and ignored me for 2 days then got back in touch said things were moving fast etc but still wanted to be with me …took me away for 3 nights ..was brill come home now quiet i know hes back at work …but im confused …am i just his play thing ..or is he just busy

    #580144 Reply

    Teresa Spiers

    I started seeing a man 2 mon the ago. We were, I thought, on the same book, same page. He has 2 twin 17 year old daughters and a 14 year old. He told me things like he was totally into me and that I was ” right ” for him. This past weekend he tells me that while he was getting ready to come over for my birthday, the 14 year old asked if he had a date and he said yes. She said same girl, he said yes. She said ” Well don’t bring her over here, I’ll do something if you do, so don’t bring her over here. ” So I asked if what she said would have an effect on him seeing me and all he says is ” I hope not.” Now mind you that he thought that what she said was funny. And now all of a sudden he has stopped talking to me and I have no idea why.

    #580149 Reply

    Phillygirl

    Teresa you are wasting your time with this guy. While children should always come first, it is not funny the way she spoke to her father.

    I don’t introduce my son to anyone unless things get very serious (and that takes a fairly long time of dating so I can be sure) but I would also never allow him to be so disrespectful, belligerent, or dictate how I (an adult and his Mother) will conduct myself. Of course, I also wouldn’t bring someone around my child this early on either. It sets a very bad precdent to have dates popping and out of our kids lives. They need stability, for us to set the right example, and for us to show we will consider the impact of our decisions on them, first and foremost.

    I do think people are way too quick to bring a romantic interest into the lives of their children, but that’s an aside. However, if he has a habit of bringing new women around I could understand resentment from his daughter. Regardless of all this, you are new and his children will come first.

    If you are already unwelcome and he thinks it’s funny, it shows how little he respects this situation and I’m not impressed with how he handled this. Why did he need to tell you that? Unless he’s trying to make it very clear you shouldn’t get attached.

    I’d do myself a favor and tell him thanks but no thanks, this isn’t going to work.

    #580151 Reply

    Raven

    Teresa… He’s reflecting.

    Minor children at home, always trump :(

    #605507 Reply

    Lori

    It saddens me to read all of these experiences women have with men because I’ve had them all myself. I’ve made the same attempts, had the same patience, gave the same space, made excuses….and on and on. I’m 46 and one thing I know for sure: I simply do not want a man who goes silent on me like that. I am most certainly not a woman who needs a ton of attention. I enjoy my own space and me time. BUT, I do require a man to respect me as a person they love. Going silent for a week at a time (in my experience) is not love…it’s total fear and insecurity. A day …maybe 2 tops is ok IF you’ve been together a long time…and I mean a year or more. To love someone and be in a relationship means you RELATE equally…not just disappear.

    It all comes down to work for YOU. If it doesn’t feel right for YOU then simply don’t do it.

    #605536 Reply

    Amanda

    This post is like 3 years old….

    #606203 Reply

    Maria

    This is almost two and a half years later but I have the same problem. My boyfriend going into the man cave and going no contact for three weeks, I’ve messaged and called to no avail I did nothing but support him and be sexy with him. Maybe he was overwhelmed by it all, I feel he will come back but it’s very nerve wracking not knowing why he did this. He wants space? we all do, just tell me you want it, and I’ll leave you alone.

    #606278 Reply

    Shannon

    I agree with L, if you haven’t heard from a man in a week it is done. Especially if you’ve been reaching out. This isn’t him needing me time in his cave, this is him ghosting. Please, do not take this behavior from anyone. Going into your cave is a short period of time, not weeks on end of leaving you hanging. That’s a guy who is not into you but will date you if there’s no one else. Please have more respect for yourself than to take this behavior.

    #640658 Reply

    Jan

    I’m over 40 seeing a man for 9 months we were friends for 7 months before that. He does the same thing. When we are together it’s great he’s loving romantic and we have fu he always pays for me. But when I’m not with him he’s single and meets lots of people as he’s a golfer and loves music. He won’t commit to me it’s caused fights and the last one was final that I’ll cut him out and he comes back. But its on weekends when hes away golfing he only texted me twice in 3 days last weekend. I saw him last night he’s cold but tired. I’m suppose to see him today. It seems he’s loving when hes drinking. He loves another woman but pretty sure it’s long over that was 1 yr back. He’s never married or had kids and spends ally of time with male friends he sees me 2 times a week. I feel maybe he’s no and loves men more but I love his company.. ..

    #640675 Reply

    Raven

    You’re settling for his company… I bet you could do WAY better…

    #641012 Reply

    Thandekaile

    dear

    I feel like a failure in life. I had can ectopic pregnancy, I underwent surgery, he was so supportive so I thought. he left me for her. I feel like to be on a silence mode for some time. help me please

    Thandekile

    #649054 Reply

    J

    Hi everyone, the same thing is happening to me right now little over 5 months know, I am also doing the same thing what did I say what did I do. I called a few times but the ne t day I only Tex once. I read all oh yours guys stories..We we’re doing perfect as well. Then this happened

    Thank you because I will give him the silence that he needs

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