Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Should I be upset?
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Jenna.
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Tiffany
Hi everyone.
I texted my boyfriend and asked him how his day was (we were texting about other things prior to me asking about his day) and he never replied! But he’s one Facebook and playing xbox with his friends…. I almost do and don’t care… but why didn’t he just reply?!
My boyfriend works at a very very difficult job I can’t disclose… so I know he plays xbox with his buddies to unwind… but to straight up ignore me?
Newbie
Its not a very interesting question nor does it need an instant reply. Im sure at some point you will know how his day was.
Tiffany
You’re right! I suppose so :) I was just caught off guard to see him online and not replying. I guess it really shouldn’t matter this much
Emma
If you don’t want to bore your man, do not text such things to him.
Tiffany
What should I text Emma? I definitely don’t want to bore him! He asks me how my day is occasionally as well or how my week has been? Should I stick to the rule: only text to make plans? I mean he is my boyfriend…
kaye
No you shouldn’t be upset. And I agree with Emma this is quite a boring text. What do you expect him to say…fine. how was your day? I tried to never send those kinds of boring monotonous texts to my husband when we were dating.
Instead text something like: Hope your work day wasn’t as crazy as mine and you’re having fun playing xbox and unwinding. It will make him think he has an awesome GF who understands him and doesn’t need his constant attention!!
Tiffany
Kaye, yeah you’re right!
I’m starting to think is it my fault??? He’s not upset or anything right? I’m starting to get the vibe from some of you guys commenting that I may have upset him with asking how his day is? He still hasn’t replied to me… he’s working until 4ish today. I will know what to do moving forward!
He asks me how my day is or how my week is occasionally but I’ll steer clear of this topic and leave him alone until he replies to me :)
kaye
No I don’t think you upset him. Unless you sent him a text later saying why are you online but not replying to me!?!?
And if he’s your boyfriend there is really no harm in sending those kinds of texts. But I know if I’m just wanting to unwind and see a text like that sometimes I don’t respond. Have you not heard from him since last night? Does he normally send you a good morning text or check in with you?
Tiffany
Omg no! I’m not crazy LOL! No we usually don’t text in the morning or at night.. which is fine with me! I don’t mind because I have a life outside of him. But I haven’t heard from him since last night which isn’t weird or anything… but last night was the first night I saw him on xbox and not replying. We don’t reallt text all that much… in the beginning we used to! But now we see each other on weekends when we can.. I get it, the question I asked was boring and very repetitive especially for him and I. Just seeing him on Facebook during his lunch break at work and still no reply today??
Shoshannah
oh come on! nothing wrong with asking how someone’s day was! maybe not the most original text, but let’s not put the girl down and make super self-aware of any text that she sends. my man asks me about my day regularly and it never occured to me that there is anything boring about that.
however, I agree that not geting a reply is not anything to be upset about. maybe he simply didn’t notice your text yet? it’s also true that it isn’t anything that requires a quick reply.
Tiffany
Lol thank you! I was beginning to worry not to ask him that ever again! And yes I understand doesn’t require a quick reply I suppose. I just felt a little down since he’s been on social media and playing xbox with his buddies… but couldn’t reply to his gf! Lol I’ll get over it whenever he decides to reply :) I won’t be too upset about it!
Shoshannah
:) it’s just one text, do not overthink this. unless it happens several times, or there are other issues with him, there is nothing to worry about. (he really might have not noticed)
Tiffany
This has happened before, but he doesn’t even reply to his friends sometimes I’ve relalized and even saw on his phone lol…. but he’s just active on social media. I’m assuming he will eventually contact me since we are dating lol! Thank you!
Tiffany
So he could’ve forgotten but now it’s starting to bother me he still hasn’t texted me… usually it wouldn’t bother me if we don’t text… but I just asked about his day… sorry if I sound annoying just so confused right now
Emma
Why would asking how your day was would upset him? or anyone?
There is nothing horrible about asking this, but we advised you to AVOID boring your guy. These type of texts are “taxing” on the relationship. You feel obliged to respond but it is so blah that you feel obligated almost.
Text something else!!
How if you two text all the time or often and he has not replied to you since last night and this is out of the ordinary, call him TOMORROW and leave a voicemail if he doesn’t answer. Say I haven’t heard from you and a little worried. Is everything ok with you? That’ all. Do not say much more. If he does not respond to that, then things are off for sure.
Tiffany
Yes he is not big on texting I know this.. but my anxiety has just been bad recently with everything going on. I just hate checking my phone to see if he’s texted me yet… I feel like this is something I should bring up? This really did bother me. We’ve gone 3 says no text or talk because we were both extremely busy people…. I may be overthinking! Texting is not the source of a relationship
Newbie
Why are you so anxious? You last heard from him Yesterday right? How long are you two a couple? And does it feel good to you? You have plans to meet up soon?
But not responding doesnt mean he is purposely ignoring you. Seeing your partner online can be very weird at first. But you just have to remember everybody does their own thing to unwind. My partner and i are parttime ldr. When we are not together he makes it a point to send a good morning text with a love song and same at night. Very sweet. In the beginning i would find it odd he would say good night and after that i saw him on fb or something else. But then i said to myself, thats ridiculous, a text to me doesnt have to be the last thong he does, he doesnt have to instantly fall asleep after he says good night. You catch my drift. You have got to stop giving meaning to him being onlinelala
you sent him the how was your day text and he hasn’t responded… how long has it been since you sent that text?
Tiffany
So it’s now Thursday morning. I sent that text to him Tuesday night!
Our relationship is great! We’ve been dating for nearly a year now.. I really don’t know why I’m so anxious we can really only see each other on the weekends due to both of our jobs and we haven’t made plans yet. I honestly don’t want to text him again… seems like I might annoy him. After today if he doesn’t text me I think we have an issue… but I saw him Sunday everything was fine! We went to a movie and lunch and kissed goodbye and texted Tuesday a little bit and then he didn’t answer my “how was your day” text…Tiffany
Also I understand he has his own way to unwind… last night he probably went to the gym after his work and he wasn’t online at all he was probably doing some homework. But I saw him online this morning… it doesn’t really hurt my feelings if he takes a couple hours to reply and he’s online! Because I do the same thing to him! But idk..
Jaden
How can you tell if he’s online or not? I don’t understand that part.
Tiffany
On Facebook messenger it pops up that he’s online or when he was last online… I seriously hate that feature and think it’s an invasion of privacy! But it just pops up on my Facebook wall.
Newbie
I really wouldnt worry about this. You say he is a bad texter, so am i. Thats why i have notifications on, so i at least get a pop up, and i respond right away if i can. But sometimes i cant and then i totally forget about it since i barely go straight to the chat apps. I wouldnt mind double texting in this case but i would pick something funny
Anne ohio
Don’t text him, wait for him to call you.
Anne ohio
How was your day means, text me back so I know you care. Better to talk. So, if he texted back, my day was fine, you would feel loved? That’s stupid. IMO. I talk to my man, not text meaningless things
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