I had a boyfriend for just over a year, we split up about three months ago because of all the arguing and stress. He is quite ignorant and I’m used to having arguments with him and not speaking for days. As per usual I’d be the one to text first and cave in.
Lately we have been meeting up and occasionally sleeping together, it’s really good and we classed ourselves as seeing each other. But now I find myself feeling ignored, I’d normally expect a text a day or so but I’ve received nothing.
I always text him first so today I didn’t bother, and he didn’t bother texting me? Am I overreacting or does he just want the chase or a relationship?
He probably is busy and just doesn’t want to be constantly texting.
I’ve had this conversation all sorts of times with my guy friends – there’s no such thing as one text to a girl. It’s usually a series of texts and we look at it as an interruption and a pain in the ass if we’re in the middle of something.
Now, I understand that women appreciate the little things like the occasional reassuring text message and little thoughtful gestures. Some guys understand this, some guys don’t.
Regardless of whether or not your guy realizes how much you care about getting a text every day, I can promise you that every guy hates interrupting what he’s doing when he’s in the middle of doing something.
So what do most guys do when they’re in the middle of doing something? What do I do?
They wait. I wait.
I wait until when I have time to shoot texts back and forth with my girl and it won’t interrupt what I’m doing – sometimes that free time never comes for me (I am frequently working on projects and fill my time).
But that’s me – I work constantly. That’s my life.
If I was out with my friends or spent my time relaxing, playing or chilling out, then the work-excuse doesn’t really hold water. But even still, when a guy unplugs, he still loathes interruptions – there is no greater bliss for a man than total freedom from obligation… completely zoning out into a blissful oblivion.
So the most likely scenario is he doesn’t want to be interrupted by having to text back and forth. On the other hand, if that’s his reason, he probably also doesn’t realize how much this matters to you.
I don’t think it’s that he’s trying to manipulate you into chasing him or anything dramatic like that. He probably just doesn’t realize that it matters all that much to you and he’s doing his thing.
Just make a point of making him realize how much you appreciate texts from him.
Something to think about is that there’s a difference between making him “realize” how much you appreciate something versus “telling him” something. That’s another answer for another time.
Hope it helps,