Friendly or Interested?

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This topic contains 5 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Tammy 1 week ago.

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  • #935294 Reply


    3 years ago I met a guy on a dating app and we talked for 6 weeks before I ended things with him since it was long distance and we were in different stages in our lives and I found him to be immature. It was not a clean break as he was not happy with me ending things since he had already decided he wanted to marry me. During this time, his younger brother was very involved with giving him advice on how to impress me and teasing him constantly about his attempts (especially his texts). After things ended, the guy went on to meet another girl and got married 1.5 years ago.
    Fast forward to the present day and I ended up running into him, his wife, and his brother at an event that spanned multiple days. He tried his best to avoid me as much as possible but his brother made an effort to meet me in person and talk to me and my brother individually and on multiple occasions and told me goodbye before I left. I would never date an ex’s brother but my friends feel his brother may be interested in me and not just being friendly. Additionally, I do not consider him an ex as we did not go on a single date or have any physical intimacy but it still is a weird situation. His brother also told him at one point that I am “a timeless beauty and the best thing that has ever happened” to him so he should “not mess it up.” I do not think of myself as a timeless beauty but I have never received such a superlative compliment. Additionally, his brother and I have a lot more in common and think on the same wavelength – I know this because we are both public speakers and writers in the same field. I am very hesitant but also curious. Should I try testing the waters? Can this be done without embarrassing myself?

    #935299 Reply


    Hi! It sounds like he might be interested in you. I would approach the situation delicately and pursue a friendship first with the brother. There’s nothing to be embarrassed about here because you felt like you got along well and would like to hang out and meet up for coffee or something casual. Test out the waters a bit and see if he’s giving you flirty vibes or just being friendly.

    #935309 Reply


    Yes, you can do this. This seems perfectly normal to pursue whatever you would like with him, friendship or more eventually.

    #935340 Reply


    Maybe he was just being friendly. Has he tried to set up a meeting or shown interest in asking you out?

    #935368 Reply


    Thanks everyone! @Patricia I would be open to coffee or something casual but unfortunately, he lives out of state. @Tammy He has not tried to set up a meeting or asked me out since we last saw each other a couple of days ago.

    #935387 Reply


    You have answered your own question. He comes across as friendly but not interested.

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