Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Why is he still liking my posts?
- This topic has 16 replies and was last updated 3 years, 10 months ago by
Hpchick.
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Hpchick
So my ex broke up with me about 3 months ago. We still follow each other on social media, however I have muted his posts so I don’t see his posts. On Mother’s Day I had put up a post with a pic of my mom and I, he “liked” it and I didn’t read too much into it figuring he probably liked since he had met my mom a few times. A week later I posted a selfie and he liked that as well. Then just this past Sunday I put up a post for Father’s Day with a pic me as a baby with my dad, he “liked” that as well, and he had never even met my dad (my dad lives across the country). I have not liked any of his posts, and I used to like all his posts when we were together, so I don’t quite understand why he’s doing this. I know in Normal situations a like is just a like and who cares? But in this instance it was not an easy break up and feelings were hurt (at least on my end). I also think it’s not as simple as “oh it’s just a like” when it comes to exes unless it was a totally amicable breakup and you remain friends.
I know the obvious advice is to delete him from seeing my stuff, but I have a lot of pride and don’t want him to know these stupid likes affect me lol. I am moving on and have started to date but sometimes I still have my moments when I think of him.
Do you guys think these likes mean anything?
Ss
No. Some people just like everything. Some guys like exes stuff to show they aren’t petty. I don’t think it means much at all. If he wanted to reconnect he would contact you. If he were commenting i might think more of it but a like means nothing really there is no effort involved
Hpchick
Well that’s the thing, he’s not the type to like everything, he’s actually pretty stingy with his likes.
He’s also not one to comment unless it’s in response to something and even then he most often does not comment. The whole time we were together he never once left a comment on anything I posted.
Alice
Was he liking any of your other posts after the breakup or did this just start?
I’m sorry but men can have ulterior motifs just like women and I personally think he’s trying to get your attention. THAT being said, don’t do or say anything to him about it.
HE needs to be the one to reach out if that’s what he really wants. What’s the old saying? Don’t throw him a bone if he doesn’t deserve one.
If anything, use this as closure that he misses you and is thinking of you and leave it at that. Until he reaches out directly, he can “like” all the pics he wants.
Hpchick
The first post he liked was the Mother’s Day one which was about 6 weeks after the breakup. A few weeks later he got into a car accident and posted about it, I think on some level he was expecting me to reach out to see if he was ok, but I didn’t because I knew he was fine.
There’s no way I would reach out to him.
Alice
Ok so he wasn’t liking them after the initial breakup and now his behavior has changed. Plus, I totally agree with you that he probably did want you to reach out after the accident (that’s him hoping you saw the post and hoping you’ll at least send that quick message of “Hey I saw what happened, hope you’re ok.”).
IMO, he’s absolutely trying to get your attention. Your intuition isn’t off there. You’re also doing the right thing by not falling for it (lots of women do sadly).
Something tells me after these efforts of his don’t show results he wants he will try something else. At this point, keep doing what you’re doing and ignore him, stay silent. He will reach out if he really wants to engage with you. In the mean time, you can sit back and be happy with the simple fact that he misses you and is thinking of you.
Newbie
If he is doing this to get your attention then its a very juvenile way, dont you agree? If he really wanted to know how you are he can pick up the phone. I would remember the most important part about your relationship and that is that you are broken up. For whatever reason but a lot of the times because the guy wasnt all in. Just focus on that part as i feel you are already doing and dont get sidetracked
Hpchick
Alice, I found it very odd that he would post about a car accident, wasn’t like him and this is a man in his late 40’s!
I wouldn’t say he’s liked every post I’ve put up, it’s definitely a bit random since he started but I thought once I didn’t reach out after the car accident he would stop, and he did stop up until this past Sunday with the Father’s Day post.
Hpchick
Newbie, yes I totally agree! Especially since he’s the one who broke up with me. In retrospect I do believe the breakup was for the best.
Alice
Hpchick, yea see if he’s not the type to post on social media like it’s his diary (SO MANY people do this) then it’s definitely signaling to you to get your attention.
I do agree with Newbie, it immature. I also see it as him being proud and afraid. Too proud to just talk to you if that’s how he feels and afraid that if he did reach out to you, you might reject his efforts.
I still think he’s going to try another avenue to get to you, but until then you get to feel assured that you’re at the very least on his mind. Keep doing your thing and if he reaches out then you can decide where to go from there.
Ss
I’m sorry but even with the extra info i still dont think it means much. Its not every post. You seem to be really analysing this unnecessarily.
However, if you and Alice are right and I’m just a bit of a cynical bi**h, then as Newbie said its very juvenile and immature behaviour and really quite pathetic. I would keep ignoring him as you have been. If he is really that bothered he will contact you properly.
Xx
Hpchick
Ss, I don’t know that he’s that bothered by it, I think it’s more of an ego thing. Once we broke up he never heard from me again, I never begged I never pleaded…it was almost like I agreed with breakup and I think that’s what bothers him. I think he just can’t believe I let him go so easily. So these little likes might be an effort on his part to get me to reach out so he can get an ego stroke.
Katy
My ex did that after we broke up. He never commented or liked my pictures. I gave 30 day NC. I knew he just wanted my attention. He looked at my photos looking happy without him. He thought that all the pictures with my friends were because of him. Wrong!! I actually moved on. After the 30 days, I gave him NC, he moved on because I didn’t give him any attention. NC is great because you’re simply showing him you don’t want him anymore. It will give you an answer to see whether he would be willing to fight for you. Either way, you win.
Hpchick
We’ve been NC since the breakup 3 months ago. I agree that’s the only way to go. I also got some weird friend request from him on Facebook around 5 weeks after the breakup. It was weird because we were already friends on Facebook and the request came from his birth name (he goes by his middle name). I never accepted the request and the next day that profile was gone.
Sensy
I don’t understand why you would want him in your circle of friends or followers. I would filter him OUT.
Alice
whoa that weird friend request would be creepy. Sounds like he has a lot of time on his hands to me. You’re doing the the right thing by maintaining NC.
Hpchick
Alice, that friend request happened in the midst of the lockdown, I assumed it was because he was just bored out of his mind lol.
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