Who should be leading?

I’m really not in the right mindset to do that. He seems so resilient and has his life together (albeit previous drug addiction) well, we are both ex drug addicts but he kind of relapses from time to time. I just clicked why I’m so scared to reach out. When he found out he has to go abroad to work on his thesis he told me he felt sad but mostly happy that he met me and we lived something intense and full of emotions. He said that we will f* it up but on the bright side where we left things it’s going to be a memory he’ll carry with him. The next days of course we kept meeting but didn’t mention the moment of separation. At the airport, he gave me a long kiss and told me see you next time baby. What ever that means.