This topic contains 117 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by gama 2 years, 11 months ago.
June 21, 2017 at 4:36 pm #636136
I will be shocked if it turned out as the OP hoped, which is why I’ve stayed quiet. I’m not a pessimist. But I listen closely and pay attention, and I’m realistic.
If after all this time the guy is only giving lip service about taking the next logical step in the relationship, and needs to take a break to figure out what he wants…that is a very bad sign.
I’ve had a bad feeling since the OP’s first post. It’s always great to hear when a story works out, but I’ll be floored if this works out in her favor. I’d never want to have to drag a guy forward in a relationship. If you aren’t sure, I’m surely out.
I would love to be be proved wrong on this. Time will tell.June 22, 2017 at 6:51 pm #636428
Really hope things are going well Sofia.June 22, 2017 at 7:51 pm #636455
I agree Phillygirl. The signs were not good from the start. But she had to give it a chance anyway, or she might’ve always wondered “what if”…June 22, 2017 at 10:42 pm #636485
Is it just me or do you guys feel like we’ve been dumped? After all the advice support and caring we get…NADA…
Maybe I should start a thread on what it feels like to be dumped when you’re emotionally invested in a poster and get no updates!!! :( :( :(June 22, 2017 at 11:50 pm #636495
I understand your perspective and his. It’s not on the man to approach progressing things to moving in, it’s something you both have to be ready for and mutually want. He just isn’t ready yet and I don’t think taking a two week break is going to change that, because if he was ready he would agree.
The last time I was in a situation where someone wanted me to move in and I did not want to and no amount of time was going to change that. I was okay with seeing him, spending time, but he was not someone that I trusted having a future with and that’s okay. I hope your situation works out in the best way for you.June 23, 2017 at 11:37 am #636605
Lets keep bumping this up like a girl that doesn’t get the hint and keeps contacting when she’s been ghosted. :-)June 23, 2017 at 11:52 am #636610
I am with those who think things did not go well.
Sofia provide an update to everyone, you owe it to the forum girl. LOLJune 24, 2017 at 7:06 pm #636944
Where did she go?June 26, 2017 at 7:26 am #637277
Man, this is crappy. I think the only reason we all wanted updates is because Sofia asked us to think of her up until the 11th hour of their talk, and now silence, lol. Oh well! Hope things worked outJune 26, 2017 at 8:00 am #637285
I agree with those who thing things did not go well. Sofia was strong, but I think this guy was a coward just buying time.June 26, 2017 at 8:41 am #637291
May I ask, what happened when you saw each other on the 17th?June 26, 2017 at 8:54 am #637297
I don’t think Sofia was strong. I don’t think she would have agreed to the break if she was. I think she would have told him to decide there and then, not leave her waiting and wondering for 2 weeks.
But I really do hope it worked out!
Maybe she’s having such a good time she has forgotten out us. If not, I hope she comes back for support if she needs it.June 26, 2017 at 9:23 am #637310
@Hannah – I was thinking the same thing; not that she is not necessarily isn’t strong, but she any man worth his salt would not leave a girl hanging for 2 weeks. 1 week, MAYBE and that’s if he had other things going on, but even then, something of such importance. Anyhoo I was curious and hoping that this would be a situation where the dude did need this time away to actually think and miss.
I am afraid that he didn’t agree to her “ultimatum” but instead fed her a measly words, and Sofia agreed to what he fed her, and this may be perhaps the reason she hasn’t come back. So, she didn’t get what she wanted but still stayed with him anyway. I hope I am wrong.June 26, 2017 at 10:44 am #637337
i’ve been reading all this for nothing omgJune 26, 2017 at 11:47 pm #637495
What happened?June 27, 2017 at 7:51 pm #637722
I feel like we’ve been ghosted, lol.October 26, 2018 at 4:30 pm #726879
This is a year later but I am still curious to see what happened with this situation.October 27, 2018 at 2:06 am #726916
Sofia, it sounds like you are a much stronger and braver woman than I am.
I’m going through perhaps a similar but less traumatizing experience. I’m not young, and my partner is jittery at best on commitment.
God, I’ve seen enough therapists and read enough online help to know the ultimate solution is to love ourselves, and our happiness depends on ourselves more than anyone else, any man or woman may give you.
I’m not saying what he’s doing is right/wrong, men have their way of thinking and it’s often illogical or inconsistent to women. I wish to God that we as a human race didn’t have 2 genders and so many world problems (not just relationship wise) would be solved if there is a unified less manly gender controlling the world.
BUT there they are and there we are.
FACT: You are awesome. From the messages and how you are handling the situation, you sound awesome.
FACT: You can’t control the outcome.
FACT: You will survive this no matter what
Can we ever end up in a meaningful relationship with a thoughtful other partner ever? I don’t know. But that doesn’t need to define us (I hope).
I wish you all the best and just want to let you know that you are not alone, there are tonnes of us out there battling with the same (and some of us not even brave enough to admit it). So kudos to your courage.