What is all this? Can't read him

I think you right :((((((( he is a player

I could not sleep so I went online and checked watsup late night. He was online around 11pm and obviously did not find it important enough to text me…. ;-(

Its really weird, when he left yesterday I could somehow feel he would nor come back. We had a really great night. Really great talk. Really great morning.
But just before he left and we started talking about my work stgh seemed to stress him. He looked kinda ,stressed, after I talked about a project and questioned if he really Wd understand what I am saying.
I dont know if it was that or if he saw stgh or whatever but from that moment in I felt he changed from seeming totally in love to never see you again :-(

Just few minutes before he was still hugging me, saying he ll meet me later. Then after that change he just wallked fast to the door, not giving me a tight hug as usual and most importantly did loose that smile on his face he usually has.
I said like 2 times see you later and he just kinda left it in the room.
Did not look back either as usual. Only when I shut the door already i seen trough the window that he quickly looked back but seemed like he was really disturbed :(((((

This / such a scenario happened to me one time with my ex.
I later found out it was cause he snooped trough my phone and found stgh he did not like. However, that could be cleared and we still got together.

This guy now – especially after the long talks, the way he treat me, how he caress me etc – I did not think at all anymore that he is a player :-(
More as written above, that stgh else bothered him He did not tell me.

But however, maybe he is really such a good player!
We did not have sex yet though.
I mean, why would a man disappear before he had wht he wanted?

I dont get it anymore :-( :-(

Now I m exactly at the point did not want to be ever – sad and can’t concentrate or motivate for my work.

Yup. ..that sounded like a ‘ I’ll keep you on a string text. don’t sit around waiting on this guy.

Hmm
He cd have had sex when seeing me again on sunday.
I think it was not difficult for him to realize that.
Normally I m the opposite…. Waiting veeeery long.
This was our 5th date and as said no condoms but i was soo into him. He makes me crazy. I cant explain.
I love it when he hugs me, touches me, tries to plse me.

And i liked it that when he thought i m sleeping he was kissing my forehead, put one arm around me lay his hand on my belly and put one of my hand on his chest plus covered me more with the blanket.
It was so cute.

I donno… Somehow he really does seem to be a nice person. I think he really is,
But then on the other hand sometimes he is confusing.

Maybe he likes me but has ,other obligations,? Like a wife at home? :(

I mean, could be…?

Long post warning…

There’s a (single, straight) guy in my life whom I have had a crush on since the day I met him, but I recently learned that he doesn’t feel the same way but he still wants me in his life as a friend. Since then though (this was nearly 2 weeks ago) one or two things have made me wonder if there could possibly ever be a chance of him liking me as more than just a friend, like him prodding me in the shoulder 2x (the 2nd time just looking at me when I turn my head to look at him), singing jokingly to me eg the song “Hello (is it me you’re looking for)” by Lionel Richie (then saying he was disappointed when I said it wasn’t – “only joking”. On one occasion I felt his eyes on me and I turned to see him looking in my general direction. He’s also come over to me to talk to me which is unusual for him (possibly under the pretext of thanking me for my Xmas card). These things all say he may like me as more than a friend, but then other things like him ignoring my messages say otherwise. I don’t know what to think. Sooo confused :S

WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This was like a friggin train wreck!!

Harley, how are you not exhausted from responding!? LOL! I’m exhausted from just READING all of Samantha’s craziness! LOL

I totally understand that people come here for advice and help, I have too..But WOW!!! Samantha, I honestly don’t believe you’re in a place to be dating ANYONE right now. You really need to work on yourself, in so many different areas. Get counseling, get a life coach, go see a therapist, see a relationship guru..DO SOMETHING!!! Because you are soooooooooooooooooooo incredibly lost and how you present yourself in your posts and to this man and to the world…is heartbreaking.

Stop dating, and start working on yourself!

Come on this is a bit a mean… :-(
I agree – I probably over analyze (in general) but I m working on that now.

But bottom line is that I m really not some little needy girl despritely waiting to be with just the next best man. I have a good job. I m well educated. I make money… Etc.
And I m good looking. Well, this is what I hear almost everyday.
So most guys of course will look for sex…
i get alot of requests from married man…
Then some men are willing to chase for months… Despite theyr married or taken already. They wd txt everyday, take me out, buy me gifts,… Despite not having had sex yet with me. And i repeat, not just for a week… For months… Just in hope that id give it up.

So – how do I differenciate between ,these, and the genuine?

It’s not so easy!
I m certainly not dumb nor were my ex relations dumb. They were all genuine, good, successful men.

So really, again, I m not a desprit women that craves for attention. I m used to attention from men. Men talk to me almost on a daily basis… And thats no exaggeration.

All I want is a genuine nice relation with someone i really like. Someone who is smart nice and down to earth.

Ive seen in that guy what I m looking for. I feel very attracted to him for some reason.
I got carried away okay… It can happen to anybody.

Now I know for almost sure that he a player and I wont see him anymore.
To big the risk i ll be heartbroken.

However, one thing – if he just want / wanted sex – why would he say all that schischi nice stuff despite not even needing to in order to ,cuddle, with me (we did not have sex as you know)? And he cd just have gone home on sunday, get condoms and call me up… We live kinda close so even yday he cd just have tried to ,come over,.
This is what players usually try to do…
Getting a chance to see you at home…

Typical:
,,hey. Had a long day. Fancy some dinner? I grab stgh and come to your place,,
,,lets watch a movie,,
,,…,,,

Samantha…Carrie said great things. You may not BE needy but your whole post had you coming across AS needy. And over thinking everything. from an outsider looking in….This IS how it all comes a road. You need to try to relax and weed the bad guys out. You appear to keep attracting the wrong guys….do stop entertaining them.

Well Update…

One to one he just txted and wrote –
Hi there samantha
Nice seeing you. You are a very nice person, simple at heart.
I appologize if i did anything that may not be appreciated by you in the heart. I believe that it’s very important to take things lot slow and enjoy friendship and get to know each other and have respect.

See you soon. Work is fine. I do hope you are making good progress too. God bless you and many best wishes

So…. Is this a subtle way to say goodbye?
I don’t know but I dont get it…
Or is now the issue that i made it clear I want him physically and it was too early?

My idea is to reply later –
Thank you. I m afraid but I do not actually understand what you are trying to say?

Ok :/

He txt on his own…

Saying that he wont touch me anymore as of now when we meet. That we just remain good friends.
That he felt a bit bad.
Etc
That he think good friendship is more important so we shd not screw it up.

I was like –
Oh, sorry to hear.
Wish you all the best as well.
Just curious – what caused you to feel like that?

He said, nothing really.
That i m a hard working good person.
He felt like he wa already to intrusive in my life.
That he moved too agressive too early.
He just need some time.
Can happen sometimes.

:-(

What a crock of shit. have nothing more to do with him

Oh my God please please do not continue with this relationship… It sounds very much to me like this guy is setting you up to do a drugs run from Amsterdam back to your country.
He is not getting romantically involved with you… just stringing you along until you make the trip in December. Please take me seriously I work in a family support service around drug use and I very in tune with this kind of stuff.
Please beware