This topic contains 4 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Lane 2 months ago.
April 1, 2020 at 8:24 am #788578
My friend [21 F] is so good looking and guys stare at her everywhere, she’s very intelligent and independent too. I would say she’s like 5 times more attractive than me but when we go out to bars, all the guys come to me instead of her.
She matched with the hottest guys on dating websites, but they always ghost her? Is this because the most attractive guys have loads of very attractive options. She has a lovely personality and likes to talk to guys that aren’t pushy, forward and too sexual.April 1, 2020 at 10:21 am #788582
No from my experience attractive and smart women dont have issues finding a partner. most of them find equally attractive partners (sort of) and get even more attractive kids. And im not talking about myself since im average attractive. Also your examples are weird. You assume getting attention from guys in a bar and matching with attractive guys equals getting a good bf. Not true. Maybe she signals she looks for high quality men. So your logic has no basisApril 2, 2020 at 1:31 am #788611
Yes. Very beautiful women have an extremely difficult time finding a good match. Here’s why…
1. Being very beautiful, you have a Target on your back. Men want the ego boost of dating a hot girl, which makes for a shallow connection.
2. Insecurities. Being around very attractive people can bring out insecurities. Insecure men will do many things to cut beautiful women down to size, like ghosting.
3. The assumption is that your heard to get, you have too many options, your high maintenance. People project their ideas about who you probably are, and to avoid rejection they pass you by.
It’s frustrating to the very attractive person, who is down to earth, sweet and just wants a life partner. Notice how most super models date billionaires? Regular guys can’t handle them.April 2, 2020 at 4:21 am #788613
I’m 29. I’m an attractive girl and all people wonder why i don’t have bf. I have no problem attract hot men. But I have been struggle to find a boyfriend. Men don’t ghost me btw I just can’t tolerate them after some time.I didn’t want to settle with less attractive guys and many hot guys have suck personality. They are self-centered. Some attractive people think they have all the power. I will date average good men in future.April 2, 2020 at 11:05 am #788637
Its not about the attraction but the connection you make on a deeper level. I personally stay away from hot or very attractive men because they are more apt to be superficial and shallow v. one who doesn’t get lots of attention. I’m not saying ALL are this way but the majority I’ve come across just don’t seem to have the ability to stick with one, at least for very long, so they aren’t worth the time or energy to make any investment in. They are fun for a short bit but they lack substance so I gear towards more towards average (6 – 7 scale) where I’m more interested in their intelligence, how we communicate about a range of topics about ourselves to determine how we mesh and gel in important/major areas that will take us further than some superficial attraction.
Your friend needs to date the OPPOSITE of these men she’s been giving her time too. Like they say “a form of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again yet expecting a different result.” In a nutshell, she needs to stop dating time wasters and only date a guy who is putting in a lot of effort to get to know the person she is beyond the surface, which they do by asking her a lot of questions about her family, likes, dislikes, hobbies, favorites (food, places), etc. They want to get below the surface to find out how she truly ticks, not how she looks on their arm. If they aren’t putting any real effort in getting to know her (beyond the surface) after a couple dates and it feels superficial to her (like them ghosters), then she needs to stop giving her time immediately, and only hold out for the one who’s truly interested in developing something deeper than just taking her on some dates.
The key factor to look for is how much the MAN wants to be IN HER LIFE, not the other way around!