This topic contains 27 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Ss 9 months, 2 weeks ago.
October 23, 2019 at 7:51 pm #776080
I find the update a bit confusing towards this guy as i only see flaky excuses on his side but encouraging when you describe your attitude now. Yes do the date, dont have sex and leave him hanging afterwards. That will do itOctober 24, 2019 at 4:47 am #776102
Hey, just sharing my experience which was quite similar. A few dates, great chemistry etc. He has never asked me to be his gf but somehow I assumed we were together, as in dating with serious intentions. I based it on the fact that he indeed mentioned he was looking for something real but… he never said it was going to be with me!
Anyways, similar thing happened to what you have described – and my guy also suggested that he is not looking for serious but he’d want us to keep in touch and see where this goes (or take a break and see afterwards).
As much as I wanted to stay in touch with him (I really liked him!) I had to say no to that. It didn’t come easy but I asked myself what I really wanted – and it was a relationship. But not any relationship, I want to be with someone who genuinely cares about me and sees me as their first choice. I struggle with low self esteem too and my ego gets bruised, but there is a power in positive affirmations and repeating to yourself that you deserve someone who’s crazy about you.
Anyway, similarly to you I have decided to take a break from dating as it stopped being fun. I want to get myself to a happy place (again) where I don’t feel like I “need” to be with someone. Hope all will work out for you!October 24, 2019 at 5:30 am #776104
Newbie – i get the confusion because i guess it doesn’t make sense to go on another date when he has said himself that he is flakey and confused. I guess I am interested to see what spending time with him is like with no agenda for either of us.
Also, I guess it will kind of draw a line under things as its a friend’s date. I know a lot of people don’t think people who have dated can be just friends. I really like this guy on a personality level- yes i am attracted to him too but it was his personality and conversations we have that i liked best.
I know i can just be friends with him as I’ve done it before. I’m really good friends with a guy i dated last year even though he treated me a bit badly – he faded and left me hanging. When he came back round i told him i had no interest in dating him because of how he dealt with ending things- its cowardly and indicative of how he might deal with conflict in a relationship which is not going to work for me. Anyway, my point is i can and have stayed friends with guys i like for themselves even without the romantic side. So i guess i see potential for that here