Online Dating Advice Needed

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This topic contains 5 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  lil 3 months, 1 week ago.

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  • #788322 Reply


    Hi Everyone! I’m Emily from Sydney and would love some advice/input on my situation and what I should do going forward. Background on the guy: Over the past threeish years we have matched about 6-8 times roughly across various dating apps. Nothing every came of the other times beyond joking that we matched again. Last month we matched again and started chatting more and finally exchanged numbers which we hadn’t done before

    Since exchanging numbers we have spoke on the phone about three times (first time it went for 5 hours, other two times were 2 and 3 hours) and have texted every day since. I sometimes initiate first but 75% of the time he does whether it be through a good morning text or checking in with me during the day and later that evening.

    What is bothering me is how he is quite vague about meeting as I am at the point where I want to see if something is there in person or not. When I have brought it up once before he said ‘we will catch up soon’. Just this past Saturday just gone he had a migraine, I brought up again about meeting (s***** timing on my part) he said again wed talk about it soon. Now during the week he’s said once he’s feeling better (work isnt helping as hes a tradie) he would like to catch up (i didnt ask that time, he just brought that up out of the blue). He still uses the online dating platforms as well (which is obviously fine as we havent met, but makes my stupid brain overthink about if he meets other people why doesnt he want to meet me?)

    My issue is, I dont really know what to do going forward. I dont have the best self confidence so I feel like he’s not really that interested in me otherwise he would be more proactive about meeting . . . but then the other side of me thinks he wouldnt be keeping up the communication in some way if he wasnt interested. Tips on how to not come across clingy and what I should do is appreciated.

    And yes, I can over analyse things unfortunately which I am trying to improve on not doing, but it is a slow process

    #788341 Reply

    ANM Staff

    Mod update: Hi Emily, thanks for sharing your questions with the community! I saw your post “trapped” in our moderation queue – we have to ‘silently ban’ certain words because of (a) spammers and (b) google’s prudish attitude towards certain ‘naughty words’. (Avoid the word s**t! :) )

    I’ve fixed it up and released it from the moderation queue. Carry on!

    #788343 Reply


    I dont see how he is interested at all tbh. I think he is a time waster and you should move on. You most likely wont have a chance to actually meet in person i. the next few weeks (months). But then he doesnt seem to be interested in meeting you anyways. Dont waste your time

    #788346 Reply


    Stop responding. This is going nowhere. And never again talk to a man that much! One hour absolute max!!!!

    #788347 Reply


    You are an ego stroke and he is e-tethering you. You deserve more.

    #788365 Reply


    I’m just amazed you spoke on the phone for 5 hours! Please don’t give this much of yourself away to a stranger. No one really should have that much time to give to anyone without doing an activity at the same time and in person.

    He is most likely married. Lots of married men use dating apps for ego or sex chat or he is hiding behind someone else’s photos.

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