Home › Forums › Complicated Situation / Mixed Signals › If a Guy Cheats on his GF, Does that Mean theres problems in their relationship?
- This topic has 34 replies and was last updated 8 years, 4 months ago by
Kelly.
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Bri
I have a girlfriend who is going through the same situation and as I told her, she deserves better. Just like you do. And yes there is clearly something wrong in that relationship. If you were to ever go out with him…how do you know he wouldn’t cheat on you and do the exact same thing again? If he truly cares about her he would come clean and work out the issues between that relationship, but in order to answer why? There could be multiple reasons as to why he cheated. Perhaps he believes he still loves her, but feelings do fade over time and things change, who knows? But i do know that whatever they are going through you did the right thing and stepped away.
Lady T
Hi! Yes there’s a HUGE problem in their relationship. It’s the fact that she’s with a HUGELY dishonest piece of shit who’s cheating on her. I’m not usualky this blunt but nothing to sugar coat in this situation.
Ana
Hi, Briana. I was in very similar situation like yours, it lasted for a year. I only finally managed to break off him a month ago.
I kept telling myself he’s a selfish liar, there’s thousands of reasons why I shouldn’t look back, go back. But all this didn’t stop me from missing him, and I still miss him every single day, It’s tons of tears and heartache.
I’m now dragging myself to go on dates with other guys, goes to gym, and hang out with friends.
I come here to remind myself why I left him, what his actions say about who he really is, to stay firm with NC. I need to get over him and heal up, seriously.
Hope u move on real soon
xxxredcurleysue
Any man or woman who has an exclusive relationship and goes out on the other person without them knowing is lying to them.
It is simple – if you want to act single be single. Otherwise you are a wolf in sheep’s clothing.
I think it takes guts to end a relationship when it is not working. It is hard to do but deceiving other people is even worse because inside you are then really messed up with what integrity is all about. The person you hurt the most is yourself. You are then like a leaf in the wind.
All humans are tested, some cheat and some do not. End of transmission.
sophia
oh my goodness, what a relief it is to find a majority of people in similar situations as i am in! … or at least was, I don’t know its kind of hard to break it off.
here is my story:
i met a guy through a mutual friend of ours at a bar. he came to accompany my guy friend because he needed someone to talk and vent to. well, a few drinks later instead of talking to my guy friend he talked with me. through all of his venting it was obvious that he was having relationship problems / break up issues with his “ex”. after that night our friendship was strictly platonic, i was just the friend that he would come to vent to when he needed the advice from a girls perspective. well until one night he decided to out of the blue ask me to go on a date, i was hesitant at first because i knew the situation within his love life, but i said what the heck? well, that was the first mistake i have made. i started to gain feelings and so much like for this kid that i would slumber at his place or he’ll slumber at mine. sexual advances were made towards the third month i would say, and we made lust very frequently. well, one day he had gotten a voicemail while he was asleep. at this point in time we were exclusively dating so he gave me the password to his phone. i never got the urge to check until a familiar name popped up and it was his ex. long story short, i read the voicemail, then messages, and realized that shes attempting to work things out. it was devastating! i need desperate help! i feel betrayed and so stupid and so disgusted!
Tara
I would like to propose a new name here for all the guys/gals that intentionally use someone for sex, and justify it by thinking, “well, he/she is letting me.”
Fucktard.
A Fucktard is, according to Urban Dictionary:
A person of unbelieveable, inexcuseable and indescribable stupidity. (Stupidity being defined as “knowing how and doing it wrong anyway”)
Kze
Anna!!! You are so right..
When I first met up with the trash bag, he told me he was single, flat out to my face.. Then as his behavior changed and his texts lessons. He was “seeing someone but it was nothing serious”.. Then when he came back in my life I just assumed it hadn’t worked out… I gave him what he wanted.. Foolishly.. Then come to find out this “nothing serious” chick has been his steady girlfriend for six years! Lmao! You can’t make this **** up people. It was actually my new guy that told me.. And helped me gain the courage to tell him off (we work together) and to tell him that I will no longer be speaking to him. Karma is a beautiful woman;-)
Stephanie
Sounds familiar. Unfortunately, in my situation I knew he had a gf at the time, but our story was a bit more complicated. Him and I met, went on a few dates, but I rejected him on the basis that he was in his 30’s and still living at home with his parents. For whatever reason, I could not shake him out of my head. Him and I had a total blast together, we could talk on the phone for hours, laugh, and have the deepest conversations. I hadn’t felt that connection in forever. So at this point we were friends, but I was starting to feel more for him. I then find out he just recently got a new gf. He said he couldn’t wait for me forever and he didn’t think I’d ever want him so he started dating someone new. He cheated on her twice with me. When I started pushing him to leave her, he would say “she’s just so sweet and nice…I can’t do that to her.” But at the same time he was saying how awesome I was and how horrible she was in bed. Then he said he was confused because he didn’t know if he still had feelings for me or if it was just sexual. The more I pushed him to break up with her, the more he refused and said, “I have to do things the right way and stay with her. I unfortunately no longer have feelings for you because I turned them off when you rejected me the first time.” He said he wanted to stay friends…and we did, but I really want to be with him. So, I was in a dilemma if I should try to break them up….where he’d never know it was me….or if I should just move on and take the high road. I don’t think I could ever trust him even if they did break up and he came crawling back….also, he told me he didn’t have feelings for me anymore. But I’m also mad and feel like she should know since their relationship is so new so she can runaway and find someone else who treats her better….also want him to be upset that he lost her. What would you do? Let it go and move on or tell her and move on?
Vanessa
Stephanie, start a new thread.
This one was started July 2014 and people have jumped on it in the last year and a half. Annoying because people usually read from the beginning only to find that this is a whole new girl with a new problem. And you’ll get more responses that way.
Kelly
Hi Steph!
Thanks for your post. I know where you are coming from!
Unfortunately I was that “nice girl” before. He is just using her and honestly for once I actually think you should tell her. But if possible telling her your story will make a lot of sense and help her see that you really are just trying to save her from what a fuck tard he is.. Be glad you dodged a radioactive bullet with this one. He’s emotionally “unavailable” and notice how he blamed everything on you and basically acted like a little baby or a little boy on why he couldn’t leave her
He clearly doesn’t love anyone or respect anyone. Clearly not even himself!
Believe me as much as it hurts, this guy has put you through the ringer and you’re exactly right.. People don’t change and he would unfortunately just do the same to you. It’s nothing personal from your end at all.. He’s just a user and toying around! What a jerk! Good riddance and hope you feel better
Kelly
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