Does "I don't want to rush this" mean he is not interested?


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  • #486578 Reply
    Jess

    Hello all,

    Thank you for reading my post. I am new to this dating world after my boyfriend of 4 years and I broke up about 6 months ago. I met a new guy a couple of months back and I did like him quite a bit. We seemed to hit it off. We talked for about a month via text before meeting for our first date. Call me a millennial but we had a great time and we did sleep together on the first date. He spent the night. I went to work the next day and he texted me less than an hour after he left my apartment and asked if I wanted to see him again. I told him yes and that I had a great time with him. We began spending more time together and he takes me out on real dates. But, also, we spend time together at my place a lot and sometimes he spends whole weekends with me. But we do go out and do things together, not just stay home the whole time. It feels really easy and comfortable for me, even maybe more comfortable that it did with my ex-boyfriend. We never really have any fights. Well, we did get into kind of a disagreement when he said something jokingly that I took too seriously, but I was probably being a brat. He wanted to talk it out and he apologized for what he said and promised not to joke like that anymore. I asked him where we stand, and afterwards I sort of regretted it because my friends told me that was a mistake to ask? I don’t know why I guess. But anyways, he said that he likes me and wants to go with the flow, spend more time together, do more things together, talk more often, but not rush anything. I did not think that that was that bad. He made it seem like he wants to pursue more contact. But a couple of my friends have mentioned that that might mean he does not like me so much. He does initiate contact probably 7/10 times. He usually pays unless I insist on doing so. He thinks of me. He talks to me a lot about what is going on in his life and asks about my day often. But, wouldn’t he want a relationship if he was super interested? Oh, and he also said that he doesn’t pursue other girls and would not want me to pursue other guys.

    Thanks for reading.

    Jess, 23

    #486580 Reply
    Rags

    I wouldn’t worry about it. He does seem interested and not rushing things is good. The ones that want everything straightaway usually burn out and disappear. The problem with asking friends is that everyone has a different opinion and you just get confused. If you and him are both happy with how things are then just carry on. Enjoy getting to know each other and see where it goes. Maybe he’s aware that you’re not too long out of a serious relationship and that’s the reason he doesn’t want to rush you back into one. He’s sounds like a nice guy to me

    #486597 Reply
    redcurleysue

    It has only been a couple of months….what do you want? It is too early to know someone or for them to know you fully yet.

    I would give it another three months and see what happens.

    #758016 Reply
    Walya

    Hi Jess, any update on the guy? Did it progress? I am in the same exact situation

    #758018 Reply
    tammy

    old post…

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