Home › Forums › Complicated Situation / Mixed Signals › dating a guy for a few months, hasn't deleted tinder
- This topic has 8 replies and was last updated 7 years, 5 months ago by
redcurleysue.
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Liz
So I’ve been seeing this guy for about 3 months now, we hangout almost every other day, we have dinner, watch movies, go out with friends. We have basically become best friends and we obviously have a intimate connection. We have a really great foundation for a potential beauty relationship. Although we have agreed that we both arnt seeing other people and that we are taking our time to really get to know eachother and let the universe flow. He still has his tinder app. (We didn’t meet on tinder). Point is im not much for jealousy but this little thing is like the only thing that bugs me. I don’t want to bring it up and it become bigger than it is. For all I know it’s just there to remind him of pace and time, or because swiping on tinder is its own game. Regardless I want to know if I should wait this out…. set a date and if it still bothers me then to bring it up. As softly and best I can considering I’m not much for being the pushy girlfriend. Thoughts people ?
L
But you aren’t his gf.
Tallspicy
If you are not man’s girlfriend by 3 months, you won’t be. Is he using the app, or is it just on his phone? If he is only seeing you, he should not have it. You could just say…. it feels icky to see tinder on the man I am dating’s phone. When I am seeing someone and we agreed not to date others, I do not want to be worried he is still looking. Is there something I should know?
Anything other than oops, I forgot to remove it or I will remove it immediately should be ended, as he is not committed to you and by 3 months knows if that is what he wants.
Jamie
Come to think of it, I have a Tinder profile too and I’m also in a relationship. I made it a year and a half ago just on a whim one weekend and I did it once and never opened the app again.
Are you sure that he is ON Tinder? I wasn’t on there long enough to know, but do they tell you the last time someone logged on? Maybe it’s just an old profile hanging around.
L
How do you know he has a Tinder app if you didn’t meet on it? Do you have one that you saw him or did he tell you???
Lane
Do not bring it up.
Single men are allowed to have dating apps. If you were his GF, then you have a right to bring the topic up, but until then, he’s free to use or not use it.
How much longer are you going to the let the “universe flow”? If a man fears losing you to another man he’ll step up, if not, then he’s wasting time. Maybe you should ask him that question.
Nat
He is not single. He may not be OFFICIALLY in a relationship whatever this means, because i don’t know an office that signs official contracts of this type. Tour status is what you both perceive to be. I would not worry about any apps on his phone or elsewhere. If he wants to access dating sites and dating apps he will find a way. Give him freedom and see if he is a decent guy who will act with integrity or he is a typical weasel who would use the “titles” games to sleep around while being in a de facto relationship with you. If he has integrity he won’t. If he doesn’t have it, then you talking or not talking about his apps won’t change a thing.
Khadija
We have basically become best friends and we obviously have a intimate connection.
Basically becoming best friends and lovers are two different things.
He may not see this as a relationship and that’s why this profile still exists.
I’d casually bring up Tinder via conversation as see what he says. I think you’ll gain some clarity from his answer.
redcurleysue
From what you wrote is sounds like you are both single. While at the time you had a conversation about the fact that at that moment in time neither of you was seeing someone else you did not say that you agreed to remain that way…is that correct?
If you are both single you have the freedom to be on ten dating apps. If you are exclusive by agreement – you both say you will not date others in the future – then he has no use for an app and you can question why he has one.
You have to tell us what you are.
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