Conflicted. Did I overreact?

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This topic contains 6 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  AngieBaby 1 month, 2 weeks ago.

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  • #928878 Reply


    I found out last night that while my boyfriend is with his friends, one friend in particular shows the group pictures of girls onlyfans or nude pictures of girls he sleeps with. I asked my boyfriend what he says to that and he said he makes comments that it’s hot. I got super upset and instantly felt unattractive. My boyfriend was calm and said that he can’t say “ew” to a picture like that in front of his friends, so he says it to mostly fit in but did tell me that it’s normal to be attracted to other people, which I understand. I don’t know why his friend does this and it upsets me that he shows his boyfriend that is in a committed relationship. My boyfriend was sweet about the situation and told me that he is always 100% transparent with me and anytime I have a question he answers honestly, which I appreciate. I just don’t know how to feel. Is this normal guy behavior and did I overreact or is this something to be concerned about?

    #928879 Reply

    ANM Staff

    Hi Gina – I’m sorry to hear about your situation. I’m sure our community has some helpful thoughts to share.

    It might be helpful to relay to the community additional details – is this the same friend that you and your boyfriend recently moved in with?

    #928881 Reply



    #928891 Reply


    Yes, this is ‘normal’ guy behavior…
    Young, old, in between- Single, married, partnered-
    Guys like talking about beautiful (hot) women.

    They like faces, b00bs, @ss, legs!

    Some guys are creepy about it… But, it’s not something you should take personally.

    I’m curious, what specifically bothers you…

    #928892 Reply


    Just worried he’s going to leave me for someone hotter

    #928893 Reply


    You must learn to love yourself.

    The reality… There will always be someone ‘hotter’ out there, Always.

    Tastes vary from person to person & ‘hot’ is very subjective. The important thing for you to remember, always be the best you that you can be.

    Celebrate the things about you that you love.

    #928894 Reply


    He will more likely leave you because you’re so insecure in yourself and unable/unwilling to trust him and his feelings for you. You really need to deal with that – it’s a relationship killer. You can’t control other people, you can only control yourself and until you get OK with that, life is going to be very much of a rollercoaster for you. And… whatever you fear most, has a strange way of happening because you’re giving it so much energy.

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