Can i ask out again? When and how?


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This topic contains 12 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Lane 3 weeks, 4 days ago.

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  • #777149 Reply

    Eric

    Met a girl thru online but only briefly- i had to cut the meet short for a reason.

    Next day i text her for a casual 2nd date, a hike.

    Her reply – could potentially do sunday.

    Then silent.

    I nudged her 3 days later on wedsday with a hows your week.

    She replied 2 days later… (ive been bust ect)

    Chatted up for a while through saturday.

    I didnt wanna push her the date cuz we’re texting on ig and i can see her being on a weekend trip with her friends all the while.

    Turns out she crashed with them in my town saturday night.

    Sunday morning she says shes hung over n not sure about the hike

    ‘How about some food then?’

    Couple hrs later- ‘im rlly hung over and heading home. Sorry for being a trash person.’

    It reads to me like sorry for rejecting you but can i still make one last offer and if so when/how?

    #777151 Reply

    Raven

    Why you chasing a girl who is clearly not interested …?

    #777152 Reply

    Kathy

    This girl has given you about 5 or 6 hunts she’s not interested.. Do you not see that?

    If you don’t like rejection, don’t ask her to do anything.

    #777154 Reply

    Warasen

    Ask her out again. Go for a Friday night.

    Don’t worry about rejection in the dating game guys get rejected all the time you just have to develop a thick skin. She didn’t out right reject you and hasn’t ghosted so you’re still in the game.

    Also don’t put all your eggs in this basket. Hit up other women.

    #777156 Reply

    Eric

    Would a weekday dinner to her town would be too much?

    Im actually free till the end of this month b4 my new job starts and shes rather close by.

    #777157 Reply

    Shoshannah

    I think maybe this shows a difference between men and women, because the only person who doesn’t advise to give up (and the only one that Eric doesn’t chose to ignore) is Warasen’s. Quite often I shake my head on how stubborn men are in not taking hints… Even at the moment I have some male friends who don’t get that me not replying for days and being busing “busy” all the time is me not being interested (when we have mutual friends or work together I try not to ignore them completely). I finally decided to upload a public picture with my man on fb so that they see that I am in a serious relationship, hopefully that’ll help (although I know from experience that a serious relationship won’t stop some men either… sigh).

    Eric no, she’s not interested. And you’re not in a game, sorry, pursuing this further will give you an illusion of a game at most, a false hope.

    #777158 Reply

    Shoshannah

    *being busy

    #777160 Reply

    Warasen

    Media has taught us men that women like to be pursued. The attention will eventually win her over.

    True or not the math tells me it doesn’t hurt Eric to ask her out again. In this day and age most people (for what I have gathered) do this via a text. That text only takes 5 minutes at most to compose and send. Let’s say he is the same or a slight variation of the text for 20 other women, that cuts the time for each text down to seconds. Eventually he’ll get a date with that.

    If she hasn’t blocked Eric then it’s almost an invitation for him to reach out again.

    Eric a Thursday night dinner would be appropriate.

    #777162 Reply

    Better off single

    The attention will eventually win her over.

    So don’t take no for an answer. The subtle rejections don’t mean back off at all. Be a controlling obsessive stalker until you get your way and she’s head over hills madly in love with you.

    #777167 Reply

    kaye

    I’m agreeing with Warasen here. You met her online and cut the date short so maybe she thought you weren’t interested when you actually met her. Then you ask her out for a 2nd date which she says she could possibly do on Sunday because you know she has weekend plans with her friends. So if you didn’t set up the time then, that’s on you, not her. You waited 3 days to reply there, why?

    Sometimes you’re hungover and nauseous and feel like crap. You’re certainly not going to want to go on a hike or grab lunch with a guy you could be interested in. You want him to see you at your best.

    Sounds like she felt bad for cancelling but then the date wasn’t formally set. I would set a date where you agree to the day and the time and don’t be so casual about it. If she’s too busy to schedule or blows you off then you’ll know.

    I mean what do you really have to lose by asking again?

    #777173 Reply

    Pegg

    I am with Kaye-you blew it when she suggested she was free Sunday and you did not give her a time and place to meet and have your date. Try one more time,but be specific. “I would love to take you for dinner at The Seafood Feast on Thursday. Can we meet there at 7?” easy peasy.

    #777176 Reply

    Dangerouse

    Go ahead and ask her one more time. If she isn’t busy or drunk maybe she will accept. Then quit trying. She has met you so if she is interested she will say yes.

    #777232 Reply

    Lane

    Agree with both sides but I would make it ‘low key’ something light, and interesting…not too long or boring. Is there an interesting local event taking place? A local comedy show? Fair?

    I would try once more, preferably during the day/early evening, on Saturday/Sunday (we are usually pretty tired after work) so it doesn’t feel so ‘datish’ and in a relaxed environment where you can talk while also fill some of the time up with an activity so it feels less like an interview.

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