This topic contains 17 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by Sarah.L 8 months, 3 weeks ago.
September 4, 2018 at 4:32 am #719227
I understand all individuals are different.
But as humans we do share some kinda patterns
My friend also a lover, we fight constantly.
Over stupid things, it been going over 2 years.
Yesterday we had massive argument over text message.
He accused me of been angry and insulting.
I wasn’t, I was just expressing my frustrations.
But since he accused me of doing something I didn’t do.
I said to him how is this for swearing:
F**k you and and bull*hitting ways” and I gave him the middle finger.
He said he was gonna screenshot that and save it next time I said I was not rude to him.
And then I said, add this to your screenshot, and I said the same things with extra middle finger.
He then said I was extremely rude and enough was enough
Have a nice life”
And blocked me everywhere.
Obviously I don’t want to stop been friends with him
So I just wonder if any of you ladies had guys who blocked you out of anger came back and unblock you.September 4, 2018 at 5:04 am #719228
that depends, you were rude to him for whatever reason, from your message it looks like it happened before. It is not how you should talk to your friend or a lover.
if I was him I wouldn’t unblock you , this guy has just showed you he has some self respect and showed you he won’t allow you to treat him that way!
accept it respect it and move on, and most importantly learn from it!September 4, 2018 at 5:29 am #719231
did you expect him to stick around after what you did? and twice over? :-) I think you have to give him time and reconnect after few weeks. 3/4 weeks hopefully he wld have forgiven you by then. only time will tell.September 4, 2018 at 5:44 am #719233
It happened before where blocked me on WhatsApp but not messaging or calling.
If I apologise I know he would forgive me.
But I don’t have the opportunity as he cut me off completely.
So the ball is in his court to reach out if he wants to.
I am hoping he will miss me or think of me after awhile and unblock me or get in touch with me.
He is really busy person so I think he can easily block me out of his mind if he truly wants to.September 4, 2018 at 5:59 am #719234
I don’t think the text row and blocking is the real issue here, I think you need to analyse a bit deeper. You say you argue over stupid things all the time. What is that all about? Is there something essential lacking in your life that you have to create dramas out of nothing?
Text is for quick hellos. making arrangements, short and sweet messages. It is not the place to express frustration or to argue. If you have a problem that you need to talk to a friend about do it in person, or at least on the phone. If you need to sort out an issue with someone, do it face to face.
The way you have handled this row sounds totally dysfunctional. Tit for tat insults, catching one another out and the sulks. And he’s right, you were very rude.
Probably best you two don’t talk while you identify what is meaningful in your life and decide whether you want to treat one another with mutual respect and stop having these ridiculous rows. Though an apology from you for your rudeness wouldn’t go amiss – try an old fashioned letter!September 4, 2018 at 9:53 am #719244
Is that real? You treat him like this and then you say “obviously” you don’t want to lose him? Not that obvious to me. If it was me, I wouldn’t unblock you, sorry.September 4, 2018 at 2:20 pm #719277
Jacquetta We some have codependent relationship.
Mainly from my part.
I have tried to cut contact before or Minimise our contact but when I do he always see that as problematic so he pulls me in and I do like it.
And then when I feel I am not getting full attention or he is ignoring me like yesterday I go get upset with him.
I’ve asked before if we could take 6 months no contact period and he refused by saying “I don’t want you out of my life for whole 6 months.”
So yesterday he said to me while now “you always asking for this so have a good life” he was referring to me asking for a break.September 4, 2018 at 2:46 pm #719284
Omg I am glad my life makes yours great.
I hope he comes back one day.
But I am gonna try to give myself that 6 months to see if
I can get over him and over friendship, regardless how Dysfunctional our relationship I am regretting how it ended and missing greatly .
And if after 6 months he does not contact me and I still him and want him back in my life, I will reach out to him.
But I am hoping he will before that.September 4, 2018 at 2:52 pm #719289
Is this even a real post?
If so you really need to grow up and learn how to communicate maturely.
Honestly, if someone I was dating spoke to me like that I would block them and never speak to them again.
This “relationship” sounds toxic, time to move on.September 4, 2018 at 3:54 pm #719299
Gemma, not many guys would want to marry a woman with this type of temper and such insulting manners. Just a thought for you…September 4, 2018 at 4:21 pm #719306
The disrespect is high here. I do not understand how two people who disrespect each other so very much want to keep it going…to do what? If you were to stay together and marry the kids would learn the same behaviors….really, on its face does this seem normal…is this how mom and dad taught you?
Think!September 4, 2018 at 6:45 pm #719339
Hi again Gemma,
I feel that your reply to my comments is about you looking deeper than the texting/blocking drama. That seems a positive move to me. As you used the word “co-dependent” I wonder whether you could use some help around this, being supported to look at and work on yourself.
I do know that life and relationships are not black and white, that a seemingly daft thing like a petty row can be a trigger for change, good or bad. I hope you can use this positively.
Good luckMarch 10, 2019 at 10:00 pm #742438
So I someone that wasn’t only a lover but a best friend to me. Short story short….we’ve known each other for years I’ve always loved him. Been there for him. But I just would never try to date him because of how bad he messed up long ago when he knew I liked him. But that was far long ago. I chose to move on from that, but I did promise myself I’d always be there for him. And I’ve kept that promise…..but then he got a girlfriend, a good one this time. The rest he’s dated I’ve never cared but this one….she seemed like a threat to my chances of ever leaping to go to him to pursue anything so I just gave up. I wanted him to be happy. But when he had sent that message saying hey yeah sorry was talking to my girlfriend idk why I just blocked him. I guess out of hurt and anger I waited until I cooled off. I unblocked him. Then I messaged him saying I think it would be good for me to let go. Detach myself from him and just move on because I want to be happy and I want him to be happy………but his response was very negative and he said some very….very hurtful things, he even said he hated me…I felt really bad. Cried a little too. I just wanted space and time to move on from him. So I don’t see him as a romantic lover. I just needed to see him as a friend only. But idk. I’m not sure if I made a mistake. And Idk what I did wrong other than blocking him for a few hours……I don’t believe in rushing relationships and I was scared wasn’t ready and I felt like I was going to lose him. And I was just accepting the loss. At least I didn’t say anything horrible. But he blocked me I haven’t heard from him in awhile. I miss him.March 10, 2019 at 10:07 pm #742442
you need to start your own post/topic. This thread is not yours and is 5 months old.January 24, 2021 at 8:46 am #838677
Hi @Gemma! It has been 2 years since your posted ur issue. Now, I’m living the same situation as urs. I fought with my best friend (my crush) becoz he didn’t want to change some behaviors. I always told him that i will leave forever but he as always held me back. You can say he was chasing me and I did like it becoz deep inside me I didn’t want to leave him. He said (you are someone important to me = no love here) tho,he has other girls that he flirt with…:( Anyway, I left him abd hurt him several times but he always tried to keep me beside him as a good friend to him. In the new year, I made a swear not to back to him so he got angry Coz I broke our prosmise of being best friends forever.. While he was texting me, I deleted my account (I was rude yes but I was angry and mad).. I even blocked him on fb. After one week, I called him on the phone but cut it off. He sent me message (yes?) Like he waited for me to apologize and back but becoz of my ego I said it was just a challange with my friend. He kept calling me. So, I unblock him from Fb to say it was just a game and here he said (Wasn’t it enough that you hurt me before and now u play game with me, I don’t believe ur reason of calling me (he knew that it wasn’t a game:() I sent him this emoji 👍🏻(I was mad and rude yes again).. I wanted to explain after my work but after 3 hs he blocked me in return.. It’s been 15 days now since he blocked me.. I know I was rude but I want to know if he might come back to me or not.. Hope i hear from you soon since we both had the same story.. ByeJanuary 24, 2021 at 3:17 pm #838713
i think you should focus on improving your temper in case he comes back, or to not to lose the next person you care about in your life…January 24, 2021 at 5:25 pm #838726
Firstly, thank you for the answer! You right! My weakness is that I’m sensitive and I get angry easily when my beloved hurt me. I was so rude with him and with your reply and others opinion, I confirm that It’s imposdible for him to forgive me this time. I lost him forever how sad! Thanks again for reading my storyJanuary 31, 2021 at 6:38 am #840126
Update: He unblocked me 1day ago (After 21 days).. But I wont text him in order to not bother him and move on in my life as if he doesnt exist
Thank u all