Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › A smidge proud of myself today
- This topic has 1 reply and was last updated 3 weeks, 1 day ago by
AngieBaby.
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Amanda
Hello, All:
I came here to tell a very quick little story as my poor friends suffered enough with my freaking out and complaining these past few months. Two weeks ago I ended it with a guy who I had been seeing for 3.5 months or so. I really really liked him when I ended it but despite telling him over and over again I wasn’t getting what I needed. He wouldn’t commit to exclusivity, he had only taken me out three times (the rest were home dates) and he was jealous and accusatory any time I would go out without him. Despite being devastate to do so, I ended it two weeks ago. I was struggling until very very recently (I actually met a new guy on Monday – quite unexpectedly, out in the wild so to speak and I’m really excited about him so far!) For the first two weeks after I ended it I would text or call him when I got drunk or really sad but I have been radio silent for about a week now. Well today he sent a text saying Merry Christmas and asking if he could stop over today or tomorrow with a very small gift. I said no. It wasn’t even hard. I’ve realized my self worth and I refuse to settle for crumbs. I was nice about it but definitely not agreeable to that. Maybe one day we can be friends – today is not that day (and I did also laugh at the irony of him suggesting we meet at a home instead of for a drink or something lol!) Anyway, I gave myself a small pat on the back for that one.
Happy Holidays, yall!
AngieBaby
Amanda, this is really good. Well done!
Now… why would you want to be “friends” with someone who treated you that badly? If it didn’t work out, it’s fine to simply wish him well and go on your way without further contact.
And PLEASE slow your roll about being so excited about this new guy. You want to avoid getting into the same situation again!! Everything’s hunky dory when you first meet someone and it’s easy to miss the early warning signs because you’ve got your rose colored glasses on. I meet someone new – anyone whether it’s personal or business – I think, they seem nice, let’s see how it goes. I deliberately hold myself back from getting too invested. And I watch and listen. People will show you who they are fairly quickly if you’re paying attention. If you don’t jump in with both feet it’s much easier to extricate yourself from a situation you identity as not for you.
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