Too Soon?


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This topic contains 12 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Tallspicy 2 months, 2 weeks ago.

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  • #782945 Reply

    Meg

    I’ve been going out with this guy for 2 weeks now, we’ve had two dates and everything’s been good so far, but how do I know he like me? Or is it too soon to tell?

    #782946 Reply

    Better off single

    So approach this as if you’re meeting up with a friend and avoid getting your hopes up. Match interest with interest. Watch his actions not how much he texts you. If he is into you it will be obvious.

    #782947 Reply

    Better off single

    Put off sex as long as possible.

    3 months. A guy realizes if he wants it to be long term or not after 3 months.

    #782948 Reply

    Better off single

    The less you care the more he will chase you.

    #782949 Reply

    Lane

    Keep your expectations low and treat him like any other stranger, male or female, you meet while listening, watching and observing to determine if he is worthy of YOUR time and attention! He is not the prize, YOU ARE, so sit up on your pedestal and judge him as well as other men too based on how much they are wanting to get to know you unique and interesting person you are, not what lies between your legs…all woman have those so its not any special or magical than any another woman who possess one.

    Be yourself, and if he likes you he’ll make his intentions known IF he’s interested enough to continue, if not he will stop making plans to see you. Do not engage in too much texting, if he is not making plans to see you, drop him like a hot potato and keep it moving! I highly suggest you keep your options open to meet other men too so you don’t get to overly focused on one and is easier to see which one’s are interested (keep asking you out) and which one’s aren’t (stop asking you out). Only spend time with the guys who keep asking you out, if YOU like then enough!

    #782951 Reply

    Meg

    Thank you Lane!

    How soon is it too soon to start hanging out with his friends? Cause he has some friends coming over next week but I don’t know if he’ll ask me to hang out with them.

    #782953 Reply

    Lane

    There is no specific timeline nor does it mean anything, so don’t make it out to mean something when it may have no meaning at all. You don’t know him well enough to know if meeting friends is a big deal or not as he could have introduced a dozen of them to his friends, so again, don’t get too excited or ahead of him, just lean back, let him lead—if he enjoys the time he spends with you he will want to keep spending it with you, if not, they stop.

    #782954 Reply

    Newbie

    Its way too soon to hang out with his friends. You only been on two dates in two weeks. Thats around 6 hours of knowing each other. He is more a stranger than someone you know. A guy takes around 2-3 months to know its serious.

    #783022 Reply

    Tallspicy

    You are already over invested. Please calm way down. One date at a time.

    #783082 Reply

    Meg

    Tbh I feel like he’s pulling a slow fade. After our last date last friday he said he’s got the flu and he’s been texting a lot less, but it’s not like he’s ignoring me, he’s just not on his phone as often. As soon as he gets online on insta he replies to me but then he goes like more than 10h without going on social media, which is not normal for him. Something’s going on or am I just too paranoid?

    #783093 Reply

    Lane

    Meg, I know its hard when you really like a guy but stop stalking him! As a grown man who has a life whether he’s dating or not, he’s allowed to text or be on social media when he wants to and need to step out of “mommy mode” because you are not his mother and men have no desire to date or be in a romantic relationship with their mother.

    I think its possible he was getting that kind of vibe from you. You are overly infatuated with him, heck I and others can feel it just in your writing, its palpable to the point I believe he felt that pressure (vibe) from you on the last date and it turned him off.

    Its highly possible he is giving you the “I’m not interested in pursuing this any further” excuse. Do not text, poke or prod him any further, the ball is in his court and if he doesn’t pick it up and asks you out again, then it means he wasn’t the right match for you and that there’s another guy out there that is. Stop stalking him, its stealing your freedom away to do funner and better things which is the mindset you need to have in dating…light, fun and pressure free!

    #783094 Reply

    Aus

    your anxiety is palpable; just from reading your posts. I imagine this guy is picking up on it, and might be pulling back.
    Easy does it honey

    #783095 Reply

    Tallspicy

    Oh honey , no no no. You should not be contacting any man who is not your boyfriend. Especially if he is not being consistent. You are acting needy. When you were first dating you need to let him lead. He should be doing almost all of the initiating. You are responsive and receptive. So if he’s consistent it’s OK occasionally to reach out. My guess is that you’re coming across very intense. The fact that you know you’ve been dating for two weeks is a sign because when you’re dating for two weeks you were not dating …. you’ve met each other a couple of times. Please please please look at how you view dating and honestly until you are committed you should be giving 0 f’s.

    and one last thing and this is somewhat tough love. You should not be looking at Instagram to do anything about our relationship. Please grow up. Any communication should be done by text and preferably phone. And seeing each other in person. Insta is not a communication tool. It’s a place where you put pictures. Please learn to date like an adult. I know that sounds really harsh but the sooner you learn it the better.

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