Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Should I reach out to him? please help!! :(
- This topic has 5 replies and was last updated 4 years, 3 months ago by
ANM Staff.
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lovesick95
So I have been with this guy for 7-8 months now and well he was very hard to deal with from the start. Some days he would be very loving and the other day he would act very distant (typical men nature) I was patient at first but then I wasnt able to tolerate it for too long so I told him that I am leaving.Also another guy was pursuing me very actively and when he found out he kind of freaked out so After that he changed, started showing more love. But we never defined our relationship and I hated that! Anyways everything was fine and he took me to his place to meet his parents but then he became distant again and I am going to be very honest ladies. It just really hurts when he does that. So I was getting very impatient and because of that I sent him a message “Can I go meet John (the guy pursuing me)? ”
I know I know it was a dick move. I only did that to gain his attention and I know I shouldnt have done that. But after that we had a huge fight and he said that you disrespected me by asking that question and it has changed my thinking. I asked if he wants me to leave? He said I dont know. I apologized and he said we’ll talk later. I said ok.
Now ladies should I reach out to him? Talk to him about it? Dont get me wrong I am not an insecure person. Its just that he never defined the relationship and it makes me worried. If he tells me where we stand then I wont mind him being distant or busy or whatever because I am also a very busy person but I make time for him. Should I talk to him or wait for him to reach out? I am thinking about asking him where we stand and I just want him to be clear about it because then I would be at peace. whether its something serious for him or not. He confuses me at all levels and I hate thinking about this all the time because its very toxic. PLease help :(Raven
Sorry Honey, You already know where you stand…
Danielle Pritts
Oh lord, you need to understand something. Don’t expect something from someone if you wouldn’t want it done to you. You played mind games and you hurt his feelings. At first it was okay but now that it has been 8 to 9 months into it. Now it’s just wrong. You apologize and now it’s time to give him his space.
It’s at least what he deserves.
Better off single
YOU CANNOT MAKE A MAN CHASE YOU!!!!!! From what I understand from your post, you tried to and it had the opposite effect.
You know the answer on where you stand. You pissed the guy off. Leave him alone.
Sensy
The way you went about it was not goid. Lean back and watch whether he chases you. If he chasies you by genuinely wanting to spend time with you (dinner or activity oit of the house) then accept and let things get to a happy, content and easy place with you (note do not bring up anything from the past). If he doesn’t lock you down,then tell him you’re a bit confused by your relationship and if he still is not clear with you, then start leaning way back not being available to him any longer and keep your options open and let him know once you do.
ANM StaffKeymasterMod update:
Hi lovesick95, thanks for sharing your story with the community!
Please stick with a consistent pseudonym, and don’t change names between threads. You posted under “Wanderer” a couple days ago, and now that you’re posting under “lovesick95”, people may not realize that you’re the same person as in the other thread. We ask you to stick with a consistent name to show respect for the community’s time and emotional energy that they put into their responses to you.
Thank you. Best wishes!
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