Is it low interest ?

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This topic contains 12 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Alice 1 month ago.

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  • #795508 Reply


    Hello everyone,

    I dated a guy briefly one year ago for one month but since we were not on the same page I stopped seeing him (he was looking for something casual as he is travelling a lot). I met him on Tinder. After that I deleted my account.

    I made a new account on tinder few days ago and just when I finished creating my account I started to swipe. Few minutes later I found that guy again, and he super liked me.
    I swipped right as we left in very good term.

    He then send me a text on watsap to ask me how I have been and why I was so far (at that time I moved 1h away from the city).
    We chatted a little bit and he asked me when I will be back in Town. I told him I will come back the 6th july but to leave for spain until 10th august. He asked me if I was leaving the same day and I said yes.

    He then gave me his friend contact so he can give me good recommendations.

    He hasn’t asked me out or anything so Im wondering, does that mean much ?

    I really like him, we have a very good connexion. He may be more open for a relationship now that some time have passed by.

    Im not making any moves anyways, I will wait to see what happens when I come back. I don’t want to have any fake hope…

    #795509 Reply


    To give more info, I was very clear to him that Im looking for something serious. Im the one who stopped the relationship…

    #795515 Reply


    Why do you think anything has changed for him? He is on tinder for casual hook ups. So far youre no exception and he hasnt even asked you out. Probably because he knows you dont want hook ups. But even if he would ask out, i dont think his attentions are different.

    #795519 Reply


    Im also on Tinder, doesn’t mean I want to hook up.
    He is now more stable and he has found a job in the city.

    Why would he super like me then? He is not the type of guy who “play”.

    He hasnt asked me out because I wont be in town for more than one month.

    #795520 Reply


    That you are on tinder doesnt mean he suddenly is into serious. And even guys looking for casual can super like a girl they dont want a relationship with. Look this is my best guess. If you take it as signs he is interested, by all means go ahead

    #795521 Reply


    I won’t make any moves.
    Im just trying to understand his motives.

    Anyways, I will forget about it all.

    #795534 Reply


    Sophie, sounds like he just wanted to see how you are doing and catch up. Perhaps he wants to keep you as an “option” but if he hasn’t asked you out or made any effort to communicate he’s ready to date you seriously there is no way to know his intentions.

    At this point, take it at face value. You two chatted some and caught up, leave it at that. There isn’t much more to go on. You’re doing the right thing by just living your life and seeing what happens along the way.

    #795535 Reply


    Thank you Alice.

    I think I got too excited and got my hopes up… It sucks haha I always do that, I can’t just detach when I like someone. Like I said I will forget about it.

    You are right, he might just wanted to catch up and he was just being nice. He always been very nice to me anyway.

    #795548 Reply


    Sophie, you are human and to be fair I don’t think there is a woman alive who wouldn’t be happy to hear from a guy who she found attractive. You’re smart to know the reality of it all though.

    I just can’t chase guys like some of my friends do, I just feel gross doing it. Are there guys I’ve met who I’d like to have chase me? SURE! But I stick to the reality of things, if they aren’t earning me then there isn’t much I can do.

    #795553 Reply

    T from NY

    What Alice said

    #795555 Reply


    “I just can’t chase guys like some of my friends do, I just feel gross doing it”
    haha Alice, same! I can’t… It has to be the man to chase otherwise I will never know if he truly liked me in the first place.
    So I won’t make any move.

    What is meant to be, will be.

    #795568 Reply


    It’s been a tear and he is still very active on tinder! Sounds like nothing much has changed. He is still looking for hook ips!

    #795576 Reply


    Exactly! And honestly my friends who chase guys never are happy in the long run, the guys just end up knowing that they are more into them than the guy is and it all goes to his head and just becomes a jerk.

    If a guy doesn’t pursue you, then it just won’t work. End of story.

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