Interested in an international student?


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  • #932014 Reply
    Olivia J

    Recently over spring break, I matched with this cute guy on Tinder and after he messaged me first, we realized we both go to the same college. He was in my city during the break and asked me to go out to dinner with him, but I had to decline. However, once we got back to school this week, I reached out to him and we grabbed dinner together at our school. That was only two days ago, but I’m just wondering if I should ask him to hang out again or not. I noticed how shy and reserved he is, but I made him laugh a lot while we were together which was nice. He’s from South Korea and got sent to the States by his parents to study. Since then, he’s been snapchatting me first and sending funny pictures of himself. It’s only been two days so it’s way too early to be overthinking haha, but I admit this guy is super cute and I’d love to go out with him again if he asked. I’m in no rush to be a thing yet, but I don’t really know how to approach him. Even though I’m Chinese, I’ve lived here my whole life, and it seems I can’t really apply the same American dating/flirting cues since his culture seems quite different. Even with social media, he never had any when he was in Korea and only just downloaded Snap and Instagram a few weeks ago.

    I was wondering if any of you girls had experience with foreign students and how getting to know them worked out for you? Especially if they seem pretty reserved like this guy? Should I wait for him to ask me to hangout (since I did let him know while we were walking around campus to text me if he wanted to hang again), or just let him come to me?

    #932021 Reply
    Khadija

    Don’t ask him to hang out with you. If he is interested in seeing you again, he’ll ask.

    #932025 Reply
    Liz Lemon

    He knows enough about social media and dating to download Tinder. And he contacted you first on Tinder, so he knows how to take the initiative. So he’s not that reserved, he knows how things work.

    You asked him to hang out the first time, now the ball is in his court. Let him ask to see you again. It’s only been 2 days, don’t overthink it and don’t ask him again or you’ll look desperate.

    #932091 Reply
    Eva

    Does it count if I’m the international student? lol
    You inform yourself how dating in his culture works, but don’t change your behavior because of it. There are things other cultures do in dating that might offend you before you learn it’s nothing bad in their culture. But you shouldn’t significantly change your behavior to accommodate him. Let’s say you start dating, what then, will you be going against your instincts the whole time?
    Shy or not, in most cultures it’s man’s job to initiate. If he doesn’t, let it go. You don’t want a guy where you will have to do all the work.

    On a side note, differences in dating cultures should be addressed early and discussed often

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