I want to give up but


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This topic contains 7 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Anon- not the poster 3 weeks, 5 days ago.

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  • #796416 Reply

    Anon

    So me and my ex have been talking again for about 3 months now. And I kept having these feelings that he was only talking to me again because he was bored or when it was convenient for him. We haven’t discussed our relationship or the possibility of getting back together because I wanted to do it in person and because of distance it was hard to plan. However he recently started a new job that has long hours and as soon as this job started he just started acting the same way he used to when we were together and about to end things. He started leaving me on delivered for 8-9 hours at a time even though I know he was on his phone I mean what job doesn’t allow for breaks?? When he did respond it was very short and so I responded back short too w a simple Ok. He left me on read and I got so angry because he was the one who started acting different and yet when I do it, it’s a problem? So I texted him again saying he was the one who acted like a d*ck so why leave me on read. He hasn’t answered but he’s been active and at this point I’m done with the games. I feel like I’m going down the same road I was a few months ago and I don’t want to repeat that hurt again. It just makes no sense – if you don’t care for someone why spend everyday in and out texting them and holding conversations just to do this and act so cold. He is definitely the petty type but I didn’t even do anything wrong so what is there to be petty about. I want to cut him off entirely from my life however here’s the but. He has a piece of jewelry of mine that I adore and he knows this I love it so much and I genuinely cannot replace it. It’s really valuable to me and I want it back but how can I get it back when he won’t even respond to my first message. I just don’t know what to do. I’m more sad about potentially never getting my bracelet back then losing him forever at this point which says a lot too I guess.

    #796419 Reply

    Alice

    How long have you been divorced?

    Who initiated the divorce?

    Who reached out to who to start talking again?

    Were you two talking about getting back together?

    #796425 Reply

    Anon

    Hi Alice , sorry for the confusion. We were never married just dating and we ended things back in March. It was him who initiated but I was the one who reached out a few months ago. We hadn’t discussed getting back together but we talked like we were already in a Relationship and he would show signs of jealously over me and flirt a lot.

    #796434 Reply

    Alice

    I’m so sorry for the confusion.

    So he initiated the break-up and things ended right? Then you reached out a few months ago? Just want to make sure I’m getting this all right.

    If he’s distancing it sounds like there might be someone else, I could be wrong though. It just doesn’t make sense it would all stop like that. Was this why things initially ended?

    I say forget about the bracelet, even though I know that’s hard. I’ve lost a few things in breakups as well but it was for the best because i just didnt want to see my ex again.

    #796452 Reply

    Sensy

    Couldn’t you just show up at his home and ask for the bracelet?

    #796493 Reply

    Newbie

    What is it with women leaving pieces of jewellery at guys places? Is that a territory thing? Or a reason to get back in touch? If you love it so much send him an envelop in an envelop with your adress and poststamp on it. When it comes to your story, i cant even make out if you have seen each other again. Because you say you wanted to discus getting back together but that never happened. I think your gut that he was bored is spot on true

    #796494 Reply

    Lane

    I’m sorry but did you honestly expect him to change? He was bored, as were millions of other people during the lockdown; and he now is focusing on his new job, so his need for idle “chit chat” has ended. I truly hope you learned a hard life lesson here, in that, a man who has dumped you would have to move mountains in order to get back in your good graces. Texting is not moving mountains, that’s cheap, lazy and easy to do. Mountains is doing everything in their power to “get you back” and if he did none of this then he never had intention of doing so.

    You want to entertain lazy men, then do so at your own risk.

    #796501 Reply

    Anon- not the poster

    I like Newbie’s idea about the envelope. One thing to remember, when you breakup- get all your stuff. Otherwise it looks like you were looking for a way to meet up again. Remember the advice of you only allow people to treat you the way you want to be treated. He’s not treating you well, don’t speak/text him again- ever. I’m actually learning this lesson with a female friend I have, I gave her another chance as she seemed to change after having cancer and I don’t think she has at all. I don’t plan on encouraging that relationship at all so no texting or meeting up with her. People do change, but it’s rare and very hard and they have to choose to do it- there’s nothing you can say it do to make someone else change.

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