Home › Forums › Complicated Situation / Mixed Signals › He told me to block him
- This topic has 9 replies and was last updated 4 years, 2 months ago by
alia.
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Violet
First fight with my man tonight. I said to him he needs to make more room for me in his life. He gets defensive. Starts arguing with me, tells me “you don’t respect my schedule and the things I want to do” (all because I asked to see him more). He then said “I’ll never be good enough for you, you like making drama all the time, done feeling like this, just block me”
I tried to talk with him more but he kept saying “block me”, so I just blocked him on everything. Now I feel rubbish. Don’t understand why something so simple, had to end this way? Why he couldn’t talk through our problems.Zoe
Keep him blocked. Nothing will change AND IT WILL BE WORSE if you unblock him
Do you want to fall even lower with him?Paige
I know this is painful, but his behavior (and since I don’t know either of you, I’m extrapolating) seems to be that of a guy who wanted to break up with you, but didn’t want to be the “bad guy,” so he takes any little thing as an excuse to argue and accelerates the frequency/increases the intensity of the arguments until he’s pushed you to the point where he can say, “Just block me, then. Go ahead! Block me! It’s what you want to do anyway! Just block me!”
He has accomplished his goal: He broke up with you by making it seem as if you wanted to break up with him.
Having lived this way myself, I am telling you that you have dodged a HUGE bullet.
Block him. Keep him blocked. Find someone else who doesn’t manipulate and twist words.
He doesn’t care about you.
The sooner you face that and start building your own life, the better you will be.
If he were to get back together with you, you’ll end up feeling to blame for everything and doubting your sanity.
You’ve been given a gift. Take it and move on.
Shoshannah
Wow that really sucks. Not trying to defend his s****y move, but you’re sure there isn’t more to this story? It sounds like he was feeling seriously suffocated and it would be insane if all that drove him to this was that you asked to see him more. Was it a normal, exclusive relationship? How long have you been together?
mama
Shoshannah is wise in thinking there is more to this and asking questions to clarify. We really don’t know the situation. They could easily be feeding off each other’s drama for all we know.
kaye
You know I’m going to tend not to agree with the others on this. Why? Because you say this is your first fight. Therefore, you don’t know how he normally deals with conflict. Does he get all worked up and say things he doesn’t mean and regret them later? Does he need a cooling off period of a couple days before he can be calm and talk through the issue? The answer to both of these questions was yes with my husband. As a matter of a fact, neither of us dealt with our first fight very well because honestly I thought he was done and he thought I was done and it took us MONTHS being so stubborn for either of us to contact the other.
What’s funny is he’s the more emotional one and I’m the calmer one. So his reaction to me was like he was done and my reaction to him was like I didn’t care! When neither was true! I would unblock him and see if he comes around in a few days. If you haven’t heard from him in a week I would reach out and see if he has calmed down and wants to discuss what happened.
kaye
Oh and I have now “trained” my husband as to how to fight so we don’t ever get in that situation again! LOL
Khadija
This seems rather explosive for a first fight.
Has the amount of time you spend together come up before?In no way am I defending his behavior but, just trying to get more context.
mama
And it sounds like it was all done via text. Never fight over text, it rarely turns out well. :(
alia
He reversed psychologied you into a breakup. Very crafty. Please keep him blocked indefinitely.
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