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Home › Forums › Complicated Situation / Mixed Signals › Friends with benefits complications
Ss.
Confusedchick
We have been on and off friends with benefits for two years. He gets in relationships and when they break up he comes back to me. I went one year with seeing him and we recently seen each other again. We went out for drinks and went to a place that’s like an arcade. Later that night we hooked up and fell asleep. I wake up and he takes me home then he contacts me sends me snaps of him. Everything was ok. The next time we see each other i go over his place and we have sex again except this time I haven’t heard from him since that day. How does it go from us being on good terms the first time around to the next time around not hearing from him at all. When he’s in a relationship he still would reach out to me. So I’m not understanding what’s happened
Better off single
The dude uses you in between women and you are wondering what happened?
Ss
There is no complication. He is treating you as an option for sex because he considers that this is what you are ok with from your actions so far.
There is nothing wrong with this set up if its what you both want and you’ve been clear on that, but it seems you want and expect more.
The guy isn’t a mind reader and he isn’t using you, he is just treating you as a casual hook up as that is how you have presented things to him.
You have three options. One, you do nothing and carry on as a fwb accepting that there are no obligations in such an arrangement. Two, you tell him how you feel and you would like more. The ball will be in his court then to decide if he wants more then fwb. I think its unlikely as he would likely have made that known by his actions already and his actions don’t chime with him wanting more. Three you end the arrangement and move on to start dating men who want a real relationship.
There isn’t anything complex here- its simply you expect more from the arrangement then he does
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