Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Do you ever find yourself randomly crying over your ex husband?
- This topic has 3 replies and was last updated 3 years, 4 months ago by
A.
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A
I dated (and was married to) a guy for 10 years. We were married for 7 of them. We loved each other but it was just not working out. It was an unhealthy relationship. I think part of the issue is that we met each other very young (21) and we just grew apart over time. He is the only long and serious relationship that I’ve been in, in my life. We have been divorced for three years now. He is remarried. I am still single.
Every now and then (more recently) I think about the good times we had, then I burst out in tears thinking about how things ended. We didn’t have good closure and it was a tough divorce.
I’ve dated a handful of guys in the past three years, but nothing has had any meaning, so I move on after a few dates or a few months. I feel like maybe I’m not over the divorce and this is why I can’t move on with someone else.
Please help. Thanks!
Tallspicy
Please find a therapist to help you grieve.
Elvira
Hi A
I think the fact you haven’t been able to connect with someone else is making you feel lonely and thinking about the only true love you knew is making you sad. I do agree that speaking to a therapist may help. I also think it is normal for us to reminisce about those we loved and feel sad at certain times especially when we feel like the other person moved on. I don’t believe in closure by having a conversation with the other person it isn’t going to bring closure, closure comes from within. The problem would be if you let these emotions control you. I don’t think that is the case here with you but seeking an unbias opinion and someone who will hear your concerns may be helpful. I would also suggest trying out some dating sites and meeting people simply to get yourself out there. Do not look at it as finding a new husband but someone you can connect with even if it is for the time being. Dating gets easier once you go into it without too many expectations. Good luck!A
Elvira,
Thank you so much for your response. Sometimes I feel alone in this and have wanted to text him 100x, but the fact that he’s remarried has held me back from doing so. I know that I need to get over it, I’ve just very hard. You’re right about a therapist. I’ve been meaning to find one.
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