Should I just give up?


Home Forums Did He Lose Interest? Should I just give up?

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  • #932422 Reply
    Paula

    We met on internet in the mid of January. Throughout February things were good, we were texting almost everyday. At the end of the month I got overwhelmed with my personal stuff (which made me stressed out) and I feel the way we talked changed. He was never talkative, he would rather observe what I talk about and when I said I do not wanna “talk to myself all the time”, he backed off even more. He would tell me that he likes to read what I say, but never gave me much about himself… He used to send me texts to start a conversation like “have a good day” but how do you respond to that over and over again?…March was very silent for us, we were not talking for several days in a row, only few conversations happened and I always initiated them. If I text he always responds (quickly) but always with dry, short answers. He mentioned two times (since february) that we should meet, because he does not like to text and prefers in person communication, but that’s it. We never took it more that way. When I tried to see if we could actually find some time he laughed (or I took it that way, cause he sent me a laughing emoji ) even though he came with the idea in the first place… We are both introverts and deep conversations are not our thing… I am kinda getting tired of trying to figuring out the ways to continue our talks and don’t want to be annoying…right now I really don’t know what to think… I don’t know what he thinks… Should I hope he will contact me or just move on?

    #932424 Reply
    Raven

    Move on…
    If he contacts you you can reconsider.

    #932425 Reply
    Maddie

    It sounds like you never met in person, even though he asked you twice and said he’d prefer that to texting? I think this is your problem right here. He doesn’t want to be pen pals but that’s where things seem to be heading. Maybe he wasn’t aggressive enough in planning a date since you seemed lukewarm about it and he’s introverted anyway. If you’re not intending to meet him, you should move on. If you are, you may take the initiative here since he’d already asked twice but you were going through personal issues. If you meet and hit it off in person and are clear in your interest from there then it will be back on him to initiate more dates. If it starts fading out again, which it very well may since it’s not a good sign that you didn’t meet in 3 months if you’re local to each other, then you can be sure it’s just not working. Good luck!

    #932426 Reply
    Rox

    Very low effort = not interested.
    He was not interested in you.
    When you meet online. Try to meet them in the first 2-3 weeks. Otherwise, how do you know if that person is even who they say they are. Please just move on.
    What did you like about him anyway?

    #932434 Reply
    Liz Lemon

    You’ve been texting for 3 months. You haven’t even spoken on the phone. This guy isn’t escalating your interactions–a guy who’s serious about dating will gradually escalate. Ask to talk on the phone, ask to meet, arrange a date, etc.

    This guy has done none of these things. You’ve been initiating the texts. You’re struggling to find ways to continue conversations. You asked to meet and he sent a laugh emoji. Bottom line, he’s not interested in meeting. I would let this go. Rox is right, when you connect with a guy you should meet soon, within a few weeks, to see if you click in person. Definitely don’t text a guy for m9nths without meeting– guys who do that aren’t serious.

    #932439 Reply
    Paula

    You are all probably right. We should have met in person already… Actually the first time he suggested the idea, was few days after we started texting but I got scared that this is quick and wanted to know him more before that.. I guess I messed up here, but I am new to the scene of online dating.

    #932427 Reply
    Trixie

    He is not taking you seriously. A guy can only fall for a woman who takes themself seriously. You are coming across as unattractive because you are investing in him and he hasn’t earned such attention, and that is what he is noticing. I hope this helps.

    #932456 Reply
    ANM Staff
    Keymaster

    @Trixie – My apologies, the forum held-back your post, and it shouldn’t have. I’ll go ahead and publish it now!

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