Fwb forgot my birthday

Seems this is more “benefits” to him than it is “friend”.

“So should I give him the cold shoulder and still wish him a happy birthday in a week, or just give him the cold shoulder period?”

First off you admit this isn’t your character, so doing the above comes across quite manipulative tbh. You shouldn’t give silent treatment because you haven’t had things your way. You give silent treatment to punish him & that’s not very nice. Give him the ‘silent treatment’ altogether if this is you ACTUALLY wanting to end this, then yes.

I used to get silent treatment if I done things the ex didn’t like & let me tell you this, its mean and sh*tty to be on the receiving end. You are adult, I assume, so communicate this annoyance to him.

ALSO – he is a FWB, FWB is just that. Half of my friends forget my birthday etc, it doesn’t make them less than a friend. You’re acting as if he is your partner.

AND to top it all off you know he has depression & family issues, its a high possibility that you are not the centre of his world right now. I think you should come off your pedestal, realise he is just casual sex, he’s having a hard time & there’s more to life than your birthday!

I just know what it feels like to be on the receiving end of silent treatment. I actually walk away if a partner even attempts to behave this way with me now. Its actually known to be a form of abuse tbh. Look it up. It is not how adult relationships should be carried out. Communicate your feelings and work through things as an adult.

It sounds as if a FWB situation isn’t meeting your needs. I would have a think if this relationship is serving you. It comes over as if you’re looking for something more committal. FWB is just a casual thing. Is that really what you want?

Go onto youtube and type in “Nu Mindframe anxious preoccupied” and what her video. This is exactly what you sound like.

You need to understand rejection is a normal part of life, if this happens? You will be perfectly ok, with or without him. You don’t need him. He also isn’t the be all and end all. It sounds as though you fear abandonment. Securely attached people, don’t give silent treatment and fear being left. Do you have a lot of friends and an active social life?

Honestly, sending a birthday wish is no different than telling someone to “have a nice a day.”

The only birthdays that have a significant meaning are between a child and parents, as they are in most cases the only parties involved in the actual birth event. There is a higher degree of significance when it comes to a grandparent, godparent, sibling, best friend you grew up together with, or an actual partner you have spent a significant time with but for the rest of people you know, it holds little to no significance other than it marking a milestone (another year) of how long one has resided on this planet.

If not for FB I would’t have a clue when its someone’s birthday as I wasn’t there nor celebrated it with them. The only one’s I remember are my two sons, parents, two siblings, two oldest nephews, ex husband (were married over 20 years), ex mother-in-law (only because I had to remind my ex husband haha), and BF’s—well I did almost forgot my BF’s last year, if not for FB I would have lol.

In a nutshell, he doesn’t attach any significant meaning’s to birthdays of those he hasn’t known for a good part of his lifetime. Even if he did say “happy birthday” the significance of those words would be no different than when he tells someone to “have a nice day.” I would stop expecting people who haven’t shared in this event for most of your life to really care about it like your parents or those who spend most of your life with do.

Honestly I wouldn’t read anything into this. Birthdays just aren’t that big a deal to some people.

My husband was away at a big intensive overseas event earlier this year and a colleague who is very happily married and devoted to his wife forgot her birthday. She understood completely.

I forgot my own one year. I was working away from home so didn’t have any early cards to remind me and only remembered when the emails and texts started!

If someone is depressed they become self absorbed. It’s the nature of it.

I really don’t think this is about you.

Am thinking mirror him. Otherwise you will lose attraction from him.

Honestly, you have a right to feel the way you feel.. I’ve gone threw this before with a fwb …’I think it’s basic human decency to send a simple text saying “hpbd” to the person you’re laying down with.. even if it’s not a romantic relationship. He doesn’t hesitate to text when he wants to get his rocks off smh… Ive learned about myself that fwb does not work for me and I avoid those situations as much as I can. I know this comment is late from your original post but I wouldn’t even have wished him a happy birthday. Trust me, He’s very much aware he didn’t contact you on yours. He didn’t forget! I wouldn’t even do silent treatment, I’d do “cut off for good” treatment and move on., Take the time to heal yourself and don’t put yourself back in the fwb situation again.. it’s not for you either!