Confused what ex Bf wants…


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  • #795007 Reply
    Girl-needs

    Views pls, last weekend i broke up with my bf bec he said we have different views in life. That he feels i want more which he’s worried he might not be able to give. And that he doesn’t want to be feeling confined in a relationship. So to me it felt that he wasnt sure about me so i broke up with him…
    Now i received a msg from him asking how am i doing and he just wanted to say sorry

    So i asked what is he sorry for? That he is right …i want commitment and everything a relationship entails and that i want him to be happy and dont want him to feel confined but i cant be with someone who’se unsure of me

    His reply was “Yes you do deserve all you want blah blah” and he’s not unsure, He just think we look at life a little different, nothing wrong

    I didnt reply anymore coz im not sure what he wants..is he just making sure im alright after the break up or what… but for me, just leave me alone if u cant give me what i want..so i can start to heal.. idk..

    #795011 Reply
    TinkerBella

    He wants exactly what he said, to say he was sorry, but he can’t give you what you want. If you really want to start healing, I suggest you block him everywhere and go no contact. It’s difficult to block at first but it’s the best way to go about healing. Wishing you the best.

    #795012 Reply
    Girl-needs

    thanks for the reply @Tinkerbella. Yeah, he was just probably sorry about our break-up. I was just confused because he was still calling me sweet stuff like..just like to say sorry honey and with all that heart emoji bs! So weird!

    #795013 Reply
    TinkerBella

    You’re very welcome❤️ I agree with you, he is sorry and yes, I’d be confused too if I was still being called honey and getting heart emojis. I am sure he’s already missing you. This is where the blocking and no contact really helps you in letting go and healing.

    #795015 Reply
    Newbie

    He may not be entirely sure he wants to be with you. So give him space so he knows what life without you means. I think you handled this so good, although its hard to walk away. You read him right and acted on it. When it comes to you, stick with what you told him: you deserve someone all in. Take care

    #795033 Reply
    Sensy

    I totally agree with Newbie. Try to put your focus only on what you deserve. Don’t reflect on what could have been. Let go and let life happen

    Fast forward you will be saying.. “wow, glad I respected and took care of myself”. Good things (what you want) are in store for you. :)

    #795058 Reply
    Girl-needs

    Thanks newbie and sensie!

    Sucks as my heart still hopes But that’s how it is, will muscle exercise! :(

    #795305 Reply
    Steve

    Sounds like he has feelings for you, misses you, and may have some regrets.

    Or he’s just sorry that he can’t give you what you want.

    If I were in your shoes I’d go no contact but I would not block him. Not yet.

    #795335 Reply
    TinkerBella

    I agree with Steve, don’t block him yet.

    #795392 Reply
    Sam

    For what it’s worth, my fiance acted the same way when we took a break. He sounds confused. Give him time.. you never know :)

    #795990 Reply
    Girl-needs

    Thanks for all your responses. So i went no contact, didn’t reply to his last message. Now, after almost two weeks, he message me again just asking how am i doing. Should i respond or continue with NC?

    #795995 Reply
    Lane

    Do not respond, whereas a non-response sends the biggest message that you are moving on and have no desire to engage in chit-chat with him. If he’s not going to step up in any meaningful way then there is no reason to keep contact as its only going to hold you back from moving on by giving you false hope.

    He needs to fully feel what his life without you in it looks like. If you keep engaging with him, all you’re doing is teaching him that its OK for him to *pop in* anytime, and that you will always be there. If your not interested in entertaining him, then don’t entertain him.

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