If he would just let me go…


Home Forums Break Up Advice If he would just let me go…

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  • #775138 Reply
    Stop watching me. Go away.

    I’m trying. Im trying to get better. I’m trying to be my best self. It’s not going to happen over night. I’ve been working at it for years. I’m tired of all this wasted energy and no longer want to chase ghosts. I do not want a life coach. I don’t claim to know everything and I’m fine figuring it out on my own. I just want to be by myself for awhile. I want to be free to do whatever I want no matter how contradicting it is with out imput or studied like a f×king lab rat.

    I have my goals and I have my own way to achieve them. I fall down and get back up again. Most people may not agree or question what i do and why i do it and my life is none of their damn business anyway. I’m not out to seek revenge and the last thing i ever want to do is purposely make someone feel less than who they are. I don’t want the help. I want to be free from this. Circumstances would probably be a lot different if we actually knew eachother instead of jump to our own conclusions…I’m so sick of the games.

    I hate the mental break downs.

    My entire life I’ve figured out how to heal and do things on my own, I rarely ask for help. I never like asking for help. I do not want help. I do not want him to challenge me. I want him to let me be. I just want him to let me go. I’m letting go. Im going back to what i was doing before all this rediculous unnecessary drama happened. Let me go and MYOB! Billions of women are out there 1 less is not going to make a difference.

    I’m thankful for the lessons. I’m thankful for the times he was actually helpful. He isn’t helping anymore. It’s causing issues with ny mental health and wants to make it all about him. I was impressed at the lengths he went through to ‘claim’ me. I’m not open to receive it and for YEARS now it’s been off putting. Especially when he started pulling malicious stunts like pi$$ing on my cabin filter so I get blasted in the face with the smell of urine when I turn my a/c on in 100 degree weather or leaving dead rolly pollies all over my apartment. Haha so f×cking funny I forgot to laugh. At least it made him happy so who cares what it did to me?

    I’ve been trying to negotiate my way out of this. Igaf who he is anymore i just want to move on with my life with out this person thinking that Im living and doing things for him. I’m focusing on me and it’s real hard to do when someone is stalking me.

    I do not want a man like that in my life. Who wants a man who makes you question your own reality, treats you like trash, and makes you doubt your self worth?

    Go away.

    #775167 Reply
    J

    “My entire life I’ve figured out how to heal and do things on my own”

    I think this is a lie mate.

    “I rarely ask for help”

    You post for help under a different name, weekly.

    Just out of curiosity do you get professional help?

    #775168 Reply
    J

    Also think you should invest in a diary. I mean all these ramblings aren’t anything, anyone here can discuss with you.

    Get therapy, get a diary & perhaps look into a forum specially tailored to meeting your mental health needs.

    #775270 Reply
    Fk this guy i want someone better

    Not looking for a discussion mate.

    It’s not me posting under a different name weekly. Its him. Any post you see from me has my avatar next to it the different names i use are because i know what he is doing.

    This is the only way I can communicate with him. I am BEGGING HIM TO PLEASE STOP!

    I give bad advice. I don’t ask for help.

    I want him out of my life. I hate being watched. I hate being stalked. I hate the feeling like im not alone at times when i want to be alone. Most days its all i can think about. They are not ever good thoughts. I have nightmares. I wake up having panic attacks. I want it to stop. I want who ever is stalking me to leave me alone. I fking hate these feelings and its HIM causing it im trying to end it. I dont want him. I dont need him. I want him to go away.

    Could a therapist make him leave me alone?

    “My entire life I’ve figured out how to heal and do things on my own” let me rephrase…

    “My entire life I’ve figured out how to cope with life by myself and never wanted/needed anyone.”

    This is me crying for my life back.

    #775271 Reply
    Fk this guy i want someone better

    I want the person who gives me seething anger and makes my depression worse not better who makes life a living nightmare to leave me alone so i can fking get some peace and enjoy my life.

    #775276 Reply
    Better off single

    I do not want to work it out.

    I will not accept poor treatment.

    Every time i stop thinking about him, he does something to let me know he is still watching me.

    Everytime i start talking to someone new, he does something to let me know, I’m still not alone.

    “omg someone actually cares this much they p!ssed on things and stole things I worked so hard for. He blocks messages from guys im interested in and does what he can to keep me away from my best friend. He gets me to feel every negative emotion under the sun that I spent years burying in the deepest part of my mind and now they are resurfacing. It MUST be true love!” -said no woman ever.

    I will not accept moving on with my life as he lurks in the shadows. Go away.

    That is what I want. No grudges. No revenge. I just want to move the fk forward without this dead weight keeping me from walking faster.

    I do not follow who i think it is on social media. I think the only time I ever left comments they were nice ones. I never showed much interest in his life. Why doesn’t he just match the interest and let me go? Why does he have to watch everything I do? Why doesn’t he get that I don’t want this, stop doing it, and let me go?

    #775279 Reply
    The sound of change

    I will not betray my own principles by matching his toxic interest.

    #775282 Reply
    The sound of change

    I’m better off without him. The times when i am finally able to let go, I feel at peace and like I can get s×it done.

    There’s a truth that you know and you are deceiving your own self by not acknowledging it…it wont EVER work out between us as spouses/lovers/friends. Let me go.

    #775284 Reply
    J

    “It’s not me posting under a different name weekly, its him….the different names i use are because i know what he is doing”

    Well that makes sense, lol.

    Do you have schizophrenia?

    #775319 Reply
    Hey gaslighter leave me alone

    No. The only time I become mentally unstable is when someone else fks with my reality.

    You’re a real jerk.

    #775332 Reply
    ANM Staff
    Keymaster

    Not looking for a discussion mate.

    BoS, as I’ve said before, I appreciate your participation in this community, just like I appreciate everyone else here. But this is a discussion forum, so if you’re posting here, you should expect discussion.

    From your perspective, J’s comments may come off as glib or rude, but I think J is a reasonable person that is sharing a reasonable reaction to the things written here. I’m not saying I agree or disagree with what’s said; I’m saying that I’m not shocked that you’re receiving a reaction like that. And I expect more of those type of reactions to show up. That’s why I’m not keen on having diary-type threads like this. I suspect that they’ll attract unhelpful discussion.

    I’ve said it before, and J said it above: If it’s important to you to post these thoughts publicly, then please turn to a diary-type site such as tumblr. I can understand if writing these things is a form of catharsis that helps you, and I feel bad saying “don’t do that”. (Some of our other long-time community members take the time to write long and heartfelt (constructive) responses because writing, to them, is a form of catharsis. That’s good, and it makes me happy we have this forum.) But, again, if you’re writing things only for your own benefit and don’t want community interaction or constructive criticism, then this is not the place to write it.

    I give you my best wishes. Please seek something constructive that will help you.

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