Complicated situation – he's too stressed or not that into me?

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This topic contains 3 replies, has 1 voice, and was last updated by  Zoe 1 month, 3 weeks ago.

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  • #928688 Reply


    I met a wonderful guy online in March-immediate connection and chemistry (kissed me passionately on first coffee date). Wanted to see me 2 more times that week…at least twice a week through April. In May he found out his elderly Dad has 2 forms of cancer. He’s been managing his Dad’s treatments, Mom with house stuff and tried to start up a business. I fully understand his responsibility to his parents, so I would never push him. However, contact and seeing him started to diminish…didn’t see him in June though he kept contact. Went to FL over July 4th weekend (so had time for this) sent me selfie from there out of the blue (not his usual thing). Saw him twice in July, had asked to get together, but seeme pressured. I feel so bad about his Dad & pressure on him, wanted to help – so I made a dinner for them that they could portion out & brougt to his house-he reacted surprised & greatful. Again in Aug brought over another dinner as his Mom had to go into hospital for a few days. Was trying to be supportive even tho not his gf. Again he was very happy but that’s the only time I saw him. Then both of us went on our own vacations. When he got back wanted to see me right away..which was great 2x, then not hear from him in 2 wks (I held back texting), not see now for 5wks, tho he responds to texts, not ask to see me. Not sure what to do? Tell him know your busy, you’re great but thing need to focus on self??

    #928702 Reply

    Liz Lemon

    Here’s the thing. You started out intense with this guy (making out on 1st date, seeing each other two more times that week). Guys who start out fast almost always burn out fast. He basically was very intense with you for a couple months, but it never went anywhere.

    He does legitimately have a lot going on now with his parents, but if he wanted a relationship with you, he would let you know. There’s zero indication that he’s interested in anything serious with you. Not seeing you for months at a time (but having time for a vacation) tells you everything you need to know.

    A guy who wants a woman doesn’t leave her wondering. I think you should date other men and let this one go. Since he hardly reaches out, it won’t be hard to do. The next time you hear from him just politely decline an invitation to hang out (if he asks). If he texts just wish him well & say you aren’t looking for the same things. Don’t waste any more time with this guy.

    #928705 Reply


    Exactly what Liz said. Perfect response.

    #928708 Reply


    Men who loves you would want a woman support in difficult times
    this one is not into you

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