Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Can physical attraction grow?/sexual chemistry
- This topic has 2 replies and was last updated 9 years, 9 months ago by
buttercup.
-
AuthorPosts
-
Feeling shallow
Hi all,
I am feeling bad right now because I don’t know if how I am feeling is valid or if I’m just being a bitch. So I’ve gone on several dates with a guy who I really enjoy. He’s nice, fun, interesting, and understands me and my humor, I feel like we click well personality wise. I’ve met some of his friends as well and they are all very cool and people I could see myself hanging out with and I feel like he would get along with my friends as well.
Here’s my issue. I don’t find him totally unattractive, but I don’t find him very attractive either. He’s okay looking. Well last night was the first time we got physical after a night out with dinner/drinks. He is a good kisser, but I dont feel like the sexual chemistry was there. When we were hooking up he didn’t make me feel like he really wanted me, didn’t really make any moaning noise that much, and his penis is on the smaller side. Granted, this was all after we each had a good amount to drink so I realize that wasn’t helping. It was just awkward and I wasn’t happy with it.
Sex is important to me but what’s more important is someone I can just enjoy hanging out with all the time. I just need to know if sexual chemistry can build or if I should wait to date someone who’s clothes I want to rip off. The last guy I dated was the best sex of my life and so attractive to me, but that’s all it was. It’s hard bc I now compare this guy to him sexually . I just don’t know what to do. Should I continue seeing him? Am I being a terrible person for thinking this? Please help me
susa
No not a terrible person. We feel how we feel. We think how we think. My grandma once told me there is two kinds of love the forest fire, burns hot, and can leave behind embers that keep you warm for a life time, and the pearl kind of love which is slow, and quiet but no less loving and leaves you with a jem worth keeping safe in the shell that your lives make. I only remember this story because I asked her which kind of love she had for grandpa. He had passed away years before. She said neather. That she had married a man she liked, felt safe with but was not attracted to. They made a life togeather. You feel how you feel. You think how you think. If you want fire than you should have it, if you want nice guy than you should have that. No one should judge you. I know none of that helps you.
buttercup
You could just give it some time and not think too far ahead.
I know what you mean though. I think. I dated a guy a couple years back. We got on great. I loved his company. Wasn’t really attracted to him though. I thought maybe sex would change that. It didn’t. I felt no emotional connection in bed at all. Where as he seemed to think it was amazing. I slept with him about 6 times in total. Nothing changed.
See what happens. First time sex can be awkward.x
-
AuthorPosts
