Am I overreacting?

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  • #795558 Reply

    Diana, M

    I’ve been dating this guy since May and recently he asked me to be his girlfriend, there have been 3 incidents that have happened and I was hoping to get some advice.

    1st Incident – First date was to the beach, we were supposed to meet up at 9am, I woke up super early and got ready but didn’t hear from him until like 2pm, he claimed that he overslept and 9am was to early for him. So I told him, why didn’t you tell me that, we could have made plans for a later time, and his response was “oh thats smart” so I was like, you just decided you weren’t going to go, and let me know the day of that 9am is to early.

    2nd Incident – We were talking on the phone, he told me to hold on, it was silent but about 5 mins later, there was a lot of rumbling on the phone and tapping. About 8 mins later, i yell “hello” and he says “hello, wow you’re still there, i totally forgot you were on hold and I was scrolling on facebook”
    I responded and said wtf how do you forget you have someone on hold, he responded, I thought you woulda hung up after all that time, i figured you hang up and I was just going to call you later. I’m like so you should have just told me you’ll call me back and not to hold on.

    3rd Incident, we hung out on Saturday and he told me Sunday, I better not eat anything because he was cooking a lot of food and going to bring it to me and we were going to hang out etc. We spoke sunday at around 12pm, he told me he was going to drop off some food to his mom and then come to me. I didn’t hear from him all day but he had time to post frequently on social media,so at 9pm, after not eating anything all day, i decided to go out and buy some food because i was about to pass out from hunger. I texted him “hey, I ended up buying food cause you clearly forgot about our plans and I’m starving”
    He responds with ” what do you mean, i didn’t forget, just got caught up doing stuff”

    I just didn’t respond and he never even called me to say goodnight, we always talk at night. And he just texted me this morning saying ” hey babe” like if nothing. I haven’t responded to him yet. I am so upset that he would hype up not to eat anything cause his food is “sooo amazing” and tell me he is on his way but then not hit me up almost 10 hours later. I mean so inconsiderate that he could not even communicate.

    Am I overreacting?

    #795561 Reply


    No… you are ignoring the fact that he is not respectful and will never be.

    #795563 Reply


    RUN Bambi, RUN! Seriously, this guy has the attention span of a gnat! I bet his mom went hungry too, so you’re probably not alone. She however is probably use to his flaky behavior, and doesn’t expect him to follow through…sad these are the types of men being raised today.

    Do not be this guy’s GF, he hasn’t proven himself to be a good BF. Raise the bar!

    #795571 Reply

    T from NY

    Diana, I am concerned you are not in a good enough emotional spot to be dating if you didn’t drop this asshat for even just one of the incidents you describe! Please believe me when I say everyone on this thread wants you to be happy, and emotionally safe. His behaviors are so beyond the pale there’s no question you should never see him again. After you break it off, I also think it would benefit you greatly to read a book about how men should treat you before you venture out again. Dating can be tough and confusing even for women who really have great self love – but it should not look like this. Maybe start with Men Love Bitches and maybe others will have other suggestions. Good luck to you.

    #795577 Reply


    I’m so sorry you got mixed up with this dude. He sounds VERY immature and not ready to date or be a boyfriend for that matter.

    Even if he’s not intentionally playing games, he’s just very awful at being present with you and holding true to his word.

    I’d tell him to go fly a kite, you have places to go and people to see! You don’t have time for this sort of run around.

    #795612 Reply

    Anon 2

    You actually did not eat anything til nine at night??? Sod that, i would have eaten when I wanted too, certainly would not have starved myself that long. As Lane said, RUN!!!!

    #795614 Reply


    Girl! Why are you still talking to this manchild? Seriously. Let him be someone else’s problem.

    #795616 Reply


    I know this man, his nickname is ‘needweed’

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