Advice about a new guy

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  • #941570 Reply

    I’ve gone on 3 dates with this new guy and things have been going well. He seems to be into me on the dates but no so much in between. We have kissed/made out but nothing more. I don’t feel a strong connection towards him like in some other people who I have dated but I do still like him. I just don’t feel like he likes me as much as I like him. He will text every once in a while in between dates but not everyday and only a few message exchanges. I’m used to guys in constant contact when they are pursuing me. He has interest yes, because he is choosing to go out with me but I also feel like it’s a “he’s just not that into you situation.”

    Am I overthinking this or am I right to end things now before they go any further.

    #941571 Reply

    Does he seem to primarily to use text to make plans and not just to chat? If he’s attentive and into you on the dates and consistent in setting up the next date each time without it being weeks between, then just lean back (and you can keep talking to other people too, you’re not exclusive yet) but give him a chance. He may just not like texting or starting relationships at warp speed. If your gut continues to say he doesn’t seem interested and nothing is escalating after some more dates, then that means the pacing isn’t working for you or maybe he’s not that interested, and cut it off then. But I’d give him a bit more of a chance first, just don’t rush to invest your feelings in him quite yet. It’s only been 3 dates, it’s still early and you’re getting to know each other.

    #941572 Reply

    What means something is seeing the person. As long is he is leading seeing you consistently, he likes you. Texting literally means nothing. Men are singularly focused, he just assumes he will see you and you will download then. Men who overtext are not interested in you, they are interested in creating a thin fantasy or a projection.

    #941659 Reply

    I would continue to date him and see how things go in person. If you got out a handful more times and he doesn’t contact you in between dates except to set up another date, there’s no harm in saying something like, “I noticed you only call me to set up another date. Is there a reason for that?”

    Men do what they want; they do not do what you want. If he’s not calling in between dates, it’s because he doesn’t know that he should or doesn’t want to. You don’t want a guy who’s texting all the time because it’s a distraction and shows he has no life, but I also would expect someone who’s interested in getting to know me more to keep in touch. Extremes (texts all day long every day or only texts to set up a date with days of silence in between) are both bad, in my opinion.

    #941670 Reply

    my boyfriend was like that, he could go hours without texting but he was making plans to see me, we always had a date lined up.

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