Home › Forums › Dating and Sex Advice › Emotional Drained
- This topic has 12 replies and was last updated 3 months, 1 week ago by
AngieBaby.
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Naomi
Hey everyone. I will try to make this short as possible. I have been with my man for a year and a half and things have been ok. We have had downs but we get through it. I’m just now at the point of being drained out. He is having a down time with money again. He is being distant from me like he always does. I have asked him to bring him food while working and he denies, I asked can he come by and I just give him the hug he needs, he says he will but ends up not doing it. I normally have the money to give him ready in my saving but this time I do not and I feel bad about it. I don’t even understand why I feel bad that I just don’t have it right now. I told him I’ll work and work to get it to him soon as I can. He just blocks me out. I tell him I’m there for him and he just pushes me away. It’s like he is sort of punishing me for not helping him right then right now. I simply can’t. I take care of three households. My friend then brings it to my attention he is all on TikTok following random women left and right. On social media but can’t have a conversation with me and what I can do. We have had issues in the past dealing with other women on socials. In the past I have helped so dang much. Now it’s like if I’m not forking money over to him he don’t want me. I wish I can explain it better but I’m in tears because it sounds stupid but because I can’t help and I feel bad about it. Please help me understand. I love him and I will try to help anyway I can. I’m not rich.
Ewa
Girl open your eyes, why are you helping him? Love is not an excuse here really. He is not even nice to you , what is the point?
AngieBaby
This is the same story that’s been posted multiple times before from the person whose BF is a jerk to her unless she gives him money. All the same details written a little differently, under a different name. FYI, it’s against site rules to post the same story under different names.
What you need to understand is why you’re willing to be such a doormat and a free-flowing ATM. You’ve shown him you will literally do anything for him include hand him all the money he needs and look the other way while he talks to other women, and he’s taking advantage of it. But hard truth: after a year and a half it’s really on you not him. You’re allowing it to continue. Get some self-respect and STOP. And sorry to be harsh, but please stop whining about it while taking no action. It’s 100% in your control. This is never going to change until you take charge of your life and walk away from him.
AngieBaby
And for crying out loud stop with the bringing lunch and giving hugs. He doesn’t want lunch and he doesn’t need hugs. “I told him I’ll work and work to get it to him soon as I can.” You sound like a woman who’s been turned out and told not to come home until she has X amount of money to hand over. Continuing to do all of this makes you look pathetic and desperate, which apparently you are. You are begging to be disrespected and he obliges. You have it exactly right – if you’re not handing over the cash, he doesn’t want you. Quit crying about it and just leave.
Tammy
I am sorry but this kind of post has been posted before. Lady u dont need women here to tell you that he doesnt care for you and is with you so long as you give him money. And whts with this nonsense of working harder to give him money? You make him sound like a pimp not ur bf! Go out and get bac home to me only when u hv managed to earn your daily dough! I dont know abt this guy but you need to hv sm self respect and walk away! If you dont knowing the reality thn there is some problem with you, not him! I apologise for not being sympathetic but you do need to start respecting and loving yourslf more.
Khadija
He’s using you, stop dating him!
AngieBaby
@Khadija the last post from this person wanted to know if she is being used, LOL.
AngieBaby
@Admin, can you look into this post, someone is changing names with the same story over and over.
ANM StaffKeymasterAdmin here. Naomi, I appreciate that you’ve visited our forum and have questions for our community about men’s behavior. I hope that talking with our community has helped answer some questions for you, and brought you clarity.
That said, I need to address something with you.
As our community members have pointed out, you’ve posted on this forum using a few different names, and you’ve been giving details about different situations. Our community members do notice when something seems amiss with people’s questions, and they don’t really appreciate that.
I don’t appreciate it either.
We’ve got a community of people who will answer people’s questions in good faith, with the hope that providing some answers and insight based on their experiences will help a person make decisions that lead them away from confusion and toward’s happiness. That’s actually pretty cool, and there isn’t much of that left on the internet these days.
Don’t abuse it.
From now on, post as “Naomi”, and post real questions about your real experiences. I understand that will make it difficult to post as men who claim to have cheated on their girlfriend, but those posts were pointless anyway.
Best of luck moving forward!
ANM StaffKeymasterAs always, thank you to our community members. Y’all are great. *salute!*
Raven
Thanks @Moderator, that solves several issues 🙏🏼
Mary
Sadly, this is not about him, but your need for self love and growth. Please seek counseling to bring this for yourself. Peace and happiness!
AngieBaby
This person isn’t genuine. Just someone who enjoys making up fake stories to annoy this community. Read the admin post – they investigated and not only has the person posted this one multiple times they’ve posted those dumb threads about “I broke up with my girlfriend” under a guy’s name. If someone is posting such stupid stories they can’t possibly be real, it’s just a troll. They think it’s funny to wind up us up, because we are real people here trying to help anyone who asks a question. For some strange reason they get their kicks getting us all going. Happens from time to time here.
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